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THE MANIFESTO REMIX You've been pwn'd by ☡.☠ ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| ... links. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0JxrDTJHIc http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PfsJCIl9yA I'm being a nerd today. But not tomorrow, oh no, tomorrow I will be an adult... or at least a nerd in adult clothing. [EDIT][/size} I forgot! Today is Missouri's International Bi-Monthly Talk Like a Dirty Old Man Day! In the comments be sure to leave a dirty old man type quote like Yummy, I'm thinking of a ham dinner tonight!, or The only gland I need to know about is them mammories. If I can feel you leering in your comment you get bonus points. |
| ... John Conner, then Summer Glau would be protecting me. I'm getting ready for the new Terminator movie by watching Fox's Terminator TV show on Hulu. I was told that the show covers some of the stuff that will be in the movie. You know me, I have to go into every situation knowing all the facts, otherwise I can't know more than everyone else. Here's one thing I learned: The TV show is pretty stupid, redundant and unnecessary to my daily survival. BUT! Summer Glau is the best looking cyborg since The Jetson's maid Rosie. The things I could do to her...  ... the things she could do to me  ! I have a special place in my heart for martial artist ladies, and I have to say, Summer's art is particularly martial. But we knew this since Firefly and the movie Serenity. In any event, this brings up another topic: movie/TV franchises that cross over. Imagine it, what would happen if LOST made a movie and the only way to stay up on the beef was to watch the show? You know how badly that would suck! People use movies for TV shows, the same way they use movies for books; it's the cliff notes version where no one has to think. It's kind of like penguin researchers. They spend their whole lives researching penguins and then along comes March of the Penguins, now everyone's a penguin expert and the poor researchers are going, Well, hell, I wouldn't have spent all my life out here in this frozen tundra studying these birds if I'd have known you were going to make that movie. And another thing! Just think about how many vampire hunters are out of work because of all the vampire movies. Everyone knows how to kill a vampire now, so nobody hires the professionals. It's amazing with how many cop shows and movies there are that vigilantism remains relatively low. Like I was saying though, I think Terminator: Salvation looks fairly bitching, and if nothing else it'll be fun to play "In Which Scene Did Christian Bale Throw a Temper Tantrum", it's a drinking game too. |
... blog. A Full Length Blog who? A full length blog who doesn't care if you call the last posts cheating  !Blue months are blue months no matter how "weak" or "lame" your entries are. You guys are blog purists... and I don't know how I feel about that. Saturday my sister-in-law graduated from college with a degree in education and one in history. We's academics call that a double-bagger. Good times had by all, etc. etc. etc., but I have a recommendation to any college in the middle of planning a graduation: Don't let the students speak. Surely at Yale and Harvard the speeches are probably pretty kosher, but everywhere else, they bore. No one in the audience cares about what the speaker has to say, except for their families and they're more than likely as lame as the speech so let's move on. Read the names, take the pictures of them shaking the dean's hand, and lets move on. You know what else sucks about college graduations? The fact that there are usually two ceremonies. There's the departmental one where you get to see your grad walk and shake, etc. There's some pomp, little circumstance, and the students' speeches (bleh). Then there's the "main" ceremony with a lot of pomp, a lot of talking, and one big speech by someone you may or may not care to know. I praise and cherish any grad who only makes their friends and family attend the department ceremony. That's the photo op, the rest is showboating. Anyhoo, college graduations are usually boring and only interest the graduates, but in the end they serve a function I suppose. Where else can you go dressed as a Klansman who had an anvil dropped on their pointy hat and get away with it? Look at that calendar, just gets bluer and bluer. Not a weak entry in the lot if I do say so myself. |
| ... revolution (or so he seemed to say). I'm destroying homework. Homework is my plaything that I can bat about and molest at my leisure. Finishing things brings me a contented, happy feeling. Kind of like the one a fellow gets from watching Touched by an Angel. Mmmmmm. There's nothing a doing here in St. Louis today, so I figure I will have to mock other cities for being even stupider. In a new weekly segment I like to call F-That Place, we here at the Manifesto Remix offices in Charlotte, NC will mock other places. Here we go, this weeks place to be mocked is.... Des Moines. What the F is up with Des Moines? Their largest manufactured good is depression and their only cash crop is loser. You can't be totally down on Des Moines though, after all they're in Iowa, and all they've got is potatoes... no, wait, that's Idaho. I guess Iowa has nothing. Des Moines is French for "The Douche" which is what the residents are. During the French-Indian war, people actually fought to have the other side occupy it. Des Moines is the only place in the US where it's legal to wed not one, but two goats! Yeah, Des Moines... F that place. Alright, Iowa, bring your rebuttal. I anticipate a battle of wits! |
| ... when I used to hang out with Gabby, this was her song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MEVWHMaFR8 I'm sure she'd be thrilled to know that, but it's time to break it out again! I was at the book store here at school and there was some foxy little minx being all European on her cell-phone. I'm not sure what language she was speaking, Bosnian, Russian, Portuguese or Navajo, but she was definitely not some "American" broad. Don't get me wrong, American chicks are kosher, but they're so, yesterday, you know? American chicks were all the rage in the nineties, everybody had one. Hell, I had two. These days though the trend is for something imported. Turkish, been there, done that... twice. Mexican't? Mexi-Can and did. Canadian? Can't-nadian, they're too similar to American girls... unless they're French-Canadian, then I'll French-Kiss Canadian. This is going to sound wrong, but having an American girl is sort of, well, tacky. After 9/11 everyone grabbed a yellow ribbon magnet sticker and an American chick. It was the thing to do, we were grieving. Now though, the war, Abu Grhaib, Gitmo... we elected Obama! We're a nation ready to see other chicks from other countries. That's what Obama means to me. Healing... healing. I say let's talk to the waitress at the Chinese place and learn what it was like growing up in Vietnam. I say trawl port authority for that "love-at-first-sight" moment. I say make a run for the border, not for tacos, ... but for tang. (You see when combines with yesterdays blog it's easy to see that I'm trying to bring misogyny back.) |
| ... a lot of time on this site avoiding my paper, and I came to a startling realization. This site is like all chicks! WTF, WdC... I thought we were bro-tight. I checked my stats... 4 dudes, only 4 dudes regularly click on this crap. But that's not all, here are some other facts and figures about the ugly sexism that saturates this site:  Male WdCers earn only 3/4 as much as Females in gift points. Females control 88% of the top forums and groups. Sexual exploitation runs rampant; 66% of WdC boys want to be "pieces of meat" when they grow up, 20% want to be "objects" and 14% "firemen".WdC has created a glass ceiling. Oh sure, men could attain all that women have here, but you have to degrade yourself in the smokey back rooms of all the Old Girls Clubs. Not me! I'm taking a stand! I say what we need is men suffrage! We need a man-forum where men can get together, talk broads, sports and smoke blogars (blog-cigars, all the flavor none of the cancer). We need an order, an ancient order... an ANCIENT ORDER OF HIBERBLOGGERS where men can be men and blart loudly (blog-fart, all of the flavor none of the odor)! I say to my fellow gents, do we want to populate a site where we are regularly regarded as bartered goods to the oppressive lady-folk? Don't we want the young WdC boys to grow up knowing that they could too, one day, be a beach volleyball star, Secretary of State or even a talk show host? If you're with me, let's start that forum! Our first order of business will be to take back what the women have taken from us... our dignity. Let's put the pants back on David, let's re-inject the testosterone into baseball (barump-bump-ting), and most importantly, lets put the penis back in happiness. It all starts with a sounding shot, the call to arms... this song: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/e6faf388ce/show-me-your-genitals-2-emc-vagina-f... Jon Lajoie is the best thing from Canada since Ashley. |
| ...Thermodynamic Measurements at High Altitudes and You. I realized the other day that for three years I've never made a blue month. How weak is that!?! You can totally cheat and do it by just putting a bunch of sentences in your bloggy-box. That takes no time. So that's what I'm going to do on the slow days like Saturday and Sunday. I think the ends justify the means. I have been LMFAO over this LMFAO song. Where am I? I'm in Miami bitch. Or rather, trick, cause it's edited on YouTube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysJyFAHwVP8 ... in that polka dot bikini, grrrl. I have to write a 12 page paper by Thursday, but I'd much rather procrastinate and deviate to the detriment of my determination. I've been in a totally punk state of mind lately. I think it's because of the cabin fever that started yesterday when I tried to sit down and write the paper, I get antsy and need to throw rocks at something. If I had been born like 8 years later than I was, I would have been a Ritalin kid, fo sho. I would have been on so many pills (without the thrills), and totally zombie-fied. Somedays that doesn't sound like a bad idea, imagine what I could accomplish if a drug made me sit still and finish something. Other days though, that just seems like a bad idea, then authority could make me comply with their rules. I would have grown up listening to top 40 hits and wearing polos. Then I would have gone to law school, cause that's what zombies do, and I would have joined a fraternity cause I wouldn't have the confidence to be independent. I would have married at 25 and moved to a suburb, made a baby or two, and then at like 35 when the pills wore off I would look around and go, "Holy f king - s t! I'm a tool!" Then would come the divorce and yaddi, yaddi, yaddi, you know the rest. No pills, no tools, that's what Thermodynamic Measurements at High Altitudes means to You. |
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