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2,435 Public Reviews Given
2,435 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I try to be honest and positive. My Christian faith is an important background factor. I hate rating low but have a system that determines how I grade.
 
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My Philosophy of Rating and Reviewing Open in new Window. (E)
How do I assess people's work when reviewing?
#2259390 by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
I'm good at...
More interested in the content of what you write than the style. Theological, political, historical, scientific, or experiential, or indeed anything that paints a vision of the future. A good grammar checker will tell you about spelling and commas.
Favorite Genres
Not entirely sure as I like most stuff. I prefer something with a soul rather than purely secular. But I like Sci-Fi, anything Christian, and also 'What-if' type speculations with plausible plots.
Least Favorite Genres
Anything that fails to look for a way out of the darkness. You can be dark, just don't wallow in it. Generally, I try to steer clear of Fantasy, and most Dark or Horror stories just make me laugh or grimace due to their ignorance of the dark side.
Favorite Item Types
I have really liked some of the heartwarming dramas I have read here particularly personal stories. Thought-provoking poems or stories are cool also though I am no expert on poetical forms.
Least Favorite Item Types
Anything that is just an affirmation of the dark side. I hate empty words. I always look for human intelligence. I try and avoid Fantasy and Horror where there is no metaphorical resonance or connection with real-world truth.
I will not review...
I mainly review at random and just see what grabs my attention. I will usually skip stuff I do not like unless it gets me riled or if it is interesting for other reasons.
Public Reviews
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1101
1101
Review of Little Chubby  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via random review and was intrigued by the underlying philosophical musings here.

Reader Experience

Ingrid is talking to Little Chubby a once beautiful, colorfully decorated and beloved Christmas tree which is now being thrown out and is mournfully contemplating the meaning of its life. Ingrid says you had your moment but all things change and that love is not forever. Some how the tree stands a little taller just before the moment of its death.


Commentary

OK this has to be a metaphor cause Christmas trees do not have consciousness, cannot think and do not have the capacity to mourn their temporary existences. Children may invest part of their humanity in the glittering lights and image of a tree on Christmas Day but they quickly forget that tree once Christmas passes cause there is no person there to remember.

Taken as a metaphor this really does not work cause love does last forever and there is meaning to our lives and in essence that is the message of Christmas. That even the least of us, the poorest and most oppressed can have hope in that something more, because the love of God assures us that is so. Jesus came as a child, He entered our world, to prove that love, ultimately on a cross, by which our broken hearts could be healed and love experienced in its fullness, rather than just glimpsed, as now.

So I would reject this metaphor as nihilistic/pantheistic and not the sort of message you share with someone who just lost his job and is feeling redundant, his marriage and is feeling unloved or someone he loved to tragedy and is wondering if their love will endure beyond the grave and if he will ever see them again.

To man who just lost his job I would say, God has new plans for you in this life or the next, no situation is hopeless and try and look at this from the perspective of eternity

To the man who just lost the woman he loved to tragedy or via divorce I would say there is a deeper love that endures for eternity

Thanks for sharing. I guess your story was quite stimulating and stylistic professional.Look at all the thoughts and words it has generated. I just radically disagree with it as a simple story about a Christmas tree or more profoundly as a metaphor about life the universe and everything.


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1102
1102
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Received this via random review and stayed because today's theme seems to be strange creatures.

Reader Experience

A man, maybe Max, wakes with two people besides him: Mya who looks like a fox and Elder Andrake who looks like an owl. They decide to bite him because they cannot heal him. Biting him will transform him and help heal him. Then Mya bites him.

Commentary

Obviously a lot of unanswered questions in just this chapter alone. Where did he come from, how did he get there, how was he wounded, why are the creatures different in appearance. Why do the humans tend to join the monsters in fighting against these creatures? But despite humans generally being hostile to them these creatures decide to help him , to heal by transformation. Transformation into what remains to be seen.

A few minor errors in the text:

Consciousness does not need a capital C.

taking in first line is probably talking.

Thanks for sharing

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1103
1103
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed because my daughter loves mermaid stories

Reader Experience

Story of mermaids romantically engaged on the beach who missed the tide and got stranded overnight. A car comes and puts them in the back and drops them off in a building where experiments are done on them. People do not believe they are real. While we being transported in a truck there was an accident and they fell into the ocean. They are revived in the water and rescue the two truck drivers before swimming away into the freedom of the ocean.

Commentary

My daughter love Mako and H2O type mermaid series but these have the flexibility of having legs on land and can blend in with the rest of us. Who knows if these creatures exist. In the modern age it would be pretty hard to conceal oneself from all the surveillance technologies available and mankind is more and more intrusive in the oceans, so the probability is minimal but that does not stop people dreaming about these creatures who bring humanity and drama to the oceans, who swim in the vast blue spaces and interact with the abundance of creatures in the oceans. Most of us just stand on the seashore , swim at most 50 meters from the shore, or take a sail boat out a little further. But the ocean itself remains mysterious, miles deep and even the submarines of the worlds navies have only really just begun to explore it and understand it.

Loved your poem, its rhythm and rhyme but the story of how they got trapped in the first place seemed implausible to me given the physical discomfort of being separated from water for too long.

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1104
1104
Review of House Fly  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Received this via random review and stayed because I hate flies.

Reader Experience

Oh you describe all too vividly the fly floating in the air, probably infested with myriad diseases coming to rest on the lip of a cup.

Commentary

When I get to heaven the question as to why God invented flies and mosquitoes will be high on the list. That irritating buzzing sound they make keeping me awake at night or distracting my work. I kill these without mercy. The common house fly is a disease carrier also: shigellosis, typhoid fever, E. coli, and cholera are all on the list of stuff it spreads. So preach it sister, let us raise up an army of fly swatting, fly hating crusaders to purge the earth of this evil. Actually only half joking about thhat last part - I really do not like flies.

Thanks for a beautifully written poem that managed to evoke my full disgust of flies and get me reaching for the fly swatter in an empty room.

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1105
1105
Review of Heading Home  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Received this via random review and was hooked by first stanza

Reader Experience

I love American country music. It tells a story about something that matters to a tune that person can usually sing a long to. Here we have a veteran from some war being brought home in a casket on that last train to be buried by a proud but grieving family and community. Loved it!


Commentary

You already have rave reviews for this one and mine is no different. Truly superb and moving poem.

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1106
1106
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed because it is a matter of some concern

Reader Experience

The author describes the hazards and risks of poor waste management

Commentary

In the EU there are already strict laws relating to the issues described so I can only imagine the author is writing in less developed circumstances. For electronic goods the RoHS directive restricts hazardous substances being used in production of products, WEEE helps the recycling effort and ElectroG involves the manufacturer with that. For general waste incineration there is the The Waste Incineration Directive which is comprehensive. Developed European economies have strict rules and standards relating to human waste disposal. Medical waste is partly covered by general waste disposal directives but may require more focused thought.

Globally it is clear that much remains to be done and incidents like the Bopal disaster in India, the poisonous air in Beijing due to pollution and coal fire burning all need sorting out. Whether a global policy is possible is doubtful but international pressure can clearly be brought to make environmentally friendly policies happen. With the new administration of Joe Biden this is now going to be a priority in the USA but China for all its rhetoric remains light years away from a coherent policy as yet.

Thanks for your thought provoking article

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1107
1107
Review of Razor-blade  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Received this via random review and was hooked by your cutting edge language *Wink*

Reader Experience

An intriguing yet terrifying expose of what a razor blade can do. Me thinks he does love his blade too much.

Commentary

Descriptively powerful from a master wordsmith, the language pulls us in to experience the blades cut and movement. I found this deeply disturbing you made me afraid of a blade I cannot even see, of what it can do. Not sure I even understand what you wrote, but it was hypnotic and then there was blood.

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1108
1108
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed for the drama

Reader Experience

A very dark and brutal letter from Abraham on behalf of shadowy criminal underworld to his intended kidnap victim and prey Betty Higgensbee. No reason is given for why she will be taken and the promise of brokenness given nor why a picture of her husband, taken the month before, is attached. Dark Stuff!

Commentary

Someone who takes so much pleasure in inflicting physical and psychological pain on another has all the right qualifications to work in elite organisations like the KGB, Stasi, Gestapo or Saudi Royal family. There is nothing redeeming in this text, no glimmer of hope. One wonders what brought on this burst of negativity and extreme darkness. But it was well written, now how do I get out of this mental prison you created for me. Ah click, click....

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1109
1109
Review of Crystalline  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this poem via the Raid list and thought I would check it out.

Reader Experience

Exquisite description of the experience of snow falling under a midnight, midwinter moon

Commentary

Loved the language and the descriptive power. The poem was free verse but sometimes rhymed which I found a little off-putting.

Thanks for this.

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1110
1110
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Received this via random review and was intrigued by the imagery

Reader Experience

The poem describes someone on the edge of a black hole desperately struggling to preserve their existence from being sucked in and destroyed. But with a little faith we can believe that such self destruction is not the end and that our souls will be reborn

Commentary

In all the Star Trek movies, the ship always somehow breaks free of the Black hole, or even rescues the ship that cannot. A Christian take is less that you just surrender to events, but rather that you do everything you can and if you fail then you are still at peace because of your faith in the after life. In practice the forces at work in a black hole would most likely rip you apart before depositing your pieces light years away. Faith takes me to heaven but I think the gravity well of a Black Hole is just brutal. Even so if you are caught by the event horizon of a black hole there is actually nothing to fear for a person of faith who believes in resurrection from the dead. Not sure that reincarnation really qualifies as grounds for faith in this situation however.

Thanks for sharing

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1111
1111
Review of Apples or Onions  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Received this via random review and was touched.

Reader Experience

Jigina is a hard working Christian Indian girl with a caring family where everybody gets involved with helping out. She is doing well in college and in sports and she has friends are there for her when she needs them. But while cutting the apples she suddenly worries that she has made too many romantic mistakes and that she will end up an Old Maid because of them. She cries and her father comforts her, hugging her and reminding her of what a fantastic person she is

Commentary

As with a lot of what you write this was very moving, tugging all the right emotional heart strings. You cannot help but love this warm, sensitive, lovable , successful character Jigina. My family were India a long time and I am thankful for this family spirit they carried back with them to England when they left which is still with us. In many ways Western culture is quite cold by comparison. You communicate the warmth and the work of family very well.

Thanks for sharing.


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1112
1112
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Received this via random review and was willing to face up to the challenge of your words

Reader Experience

The author dismisses all previous attempts to reveal the gods to ourselves. He regards the hand-holds of organised religion to be stifling and obscuring the search for true nature of divinity. He sees insights into what the gods might look like in science, multicultural psychology, abnormal psychology and mythology. The best congregation would be a collection of people curious about exploring the unknown.


Commentary

I have no idea what personal experiences may have informed this reaction against organised religion but since 90% of people would probably disagree with what you wrote here thought I would accept your challenge. As a former Religious Education Teacher I had to teach each of the 6 major religions and inspire the same curiosity about them among the children I taught. It would be rather ignorant to dismiss the insights that can be derived from such religious studies and there are a plentiful number of atheists on religious studies or even theology degrees for this reason. It is true that some pastors and religious leaders have insisted on their own interpretations and abused the power of their office. Personally I would not wish to live in a world ruled by Sharia law where limbs and eyes etc were hacked out for various offences. I find the narratives of all the major religions bar 2, Christianity and Judaism, completely unconvincing having studied them exhaustively. So in many ways I am probably now more skeptical than the author on these.

There is a proof that God exists in the life and person of Jesus Christ in human history. He is Gods proof of his existence and statement about his character. The church that has grown to include a third of the population of the world today witnesses to that person and what he has revealed about God. He fulfilled prophecies made before he came, he performed witnessed miracles that caused even his enemies to call him a magic worker, he spoke words that resonate down the ages and have the same power today as then, he rose from the dead. What more could be done to demonstrate God in human history?

Regarding the methods you choose to try and find truth. Most of these are out of scope when it comes to religious investigation. Science can neither prove or disprove the existence of God nor tell us much about his character. Psychology and Abnormal Psychology while very interested has many schools of its own and its conclusions are various, contested and alto often highly subjective. Add in the multicultural dimension and your end result is a various confused bunch of people with no clear answers to anything.

Anyway that is my 2 cents on what you wrote. Thanks for sharing.


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1113
1113
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and was impressed. I seem to be lucky today and am getting some good poetry.

Reader Experience

This is one of those paint it all black poems that really cannot see any reason for cheerfulness

Commentary

The author gives a health warning in his description. Definitely not a poem for people on the edge or suffering with depression and it could well be triggering. That said it was very well done albeit completely colored by the determination to see everything in a negative light. In practice even this broken world gives glimpses of heaven through the cracks of lives dismantled by pain, insensitivity, blindness,selfishness, hate and angry brutality. If I heard this poem read by someone, think they would have go full Gothic and cry a river before reading. But must admit I might laugh if they did and then become the subject of their next poem.

Some of the rhyming was a little liberal but overall really good, thanks for sharing



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1114
1114
Review of Broken Crayons  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Received this by random review and was deeply impressed.

Reader Experience

The author describes an empty house that once was filled with children making messes, drawing things, playing games and singing songs. Now there is a feeling of desolation and even the nights never seem to quite make it daytime. This appears to be the consequence of another's choice.

Commentary

Sorry this is one of those "Oh Wow" reviews but at least you get 5 stars. I cannot find anything critical to say about it. It provokes all sorts of questions about the whys and wherefores that lie beyond the scope of the poem itself. Why are the kids gone now as a result of another persons choice?

These 2 lines were awesome

I'm lost, a vagabond in haunted hallways,
held back from hearing their sweet voices.

Whispers of wishes and waterfalls cascade
only in my lullaby's soft slumbering serenade.

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1115
1115
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Received this via random review and though it is dated 2003 it is still an enjoyable read.

Reader Experience

A nightmare vision of what cats do when their "masters" are away hunting. Goldfish and Easter Bunny beware!

Commentary

I was a little confused about what the invasion was. If it was meant to end the "masters" then why did they do it when they were away. The E.B was killed by the attack but the invasion is then described as having failed even though the E.B. is dead and the Goldfish eaten.

There were two minor errors in the text:

lo and behold not low and behold - the lo abbreviates from look.

It is waiver not waver.

Thanks for an enjoyable read, I shall be keeping this one away from cat lest she get any ideas of own.


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1116
1116
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed because it was good.

Reader Experience

Cesar won't trade the last Baseball card the boy needed to complete his Boston Red Sox Baseball set. While the boy planned a grand theft from a Hulk lunchbox he ran into a City possum that scared the beejeebees out of him and had him running all the way back to school.

Commentary

I thought Opossums were nocturnal and there is no description of disturbing this one.

Liked the story and the shock ending was well done.


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1117
1117
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Received this via random review and found it fascinating

Reader Experience

The author describes the year 2000 as a seminal year in his life. It was the year he came of age, got to vote in the nail biting, chad counting, Bush - Gore election of 2000, went to Hawaii on holiday, started on a path of local learning that would result in meeting his wife and then a move to California, had High School Prom and wrote the obituary of a classmate.


Commentary

This was really interesting from start to finish and provokes the question which year the reader regards as their own seminal year. The sections were a good way to separate the material into these anecdotal snippets. There is nothing to criticize here, it was an enjoyable read.

Thanks for sharing all those years ago.



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1118
1118
Review of Winter  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed because I did not know what a nonet was.

Reader Experience

The poem describes the dawn to night of a snowy Winters day.

Commentary

Using the title as one of the nine lines is cheating. Loved the poem, which succinctly summed up a nice Winters day though our cat tends to go for cuddles rather sit at our feet. I also liked the slow retreat of words and syllables over the course of the day towards sleep.

Thanks for sharing


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1119
1119
Review of Beyond Time  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Received this via random review and stayed because it was a very intelligent piece of work.

Reader Experience

A Descartian take on the growth of Divine self awareness leading to a Big Bang creation event based on loneliness and a craving for intimacy with another being. The configuration of stars and planets culminates in the creation of earth, man and woman and so now God is not alone.

Commentary

This was highly intelligent and based on a loose marriage of Descartes "Cogito Ergo Sum", the Christian creation story and a subscription to Big Bang theory. The theology here is highly questionable as God lacks something and therefore creates to make up His deficiency. He is lonely and makes a friend he can talk to. There is no Trinitarian awareness here which would answer the issues of God craving intimacy with the eternal dance of the three persons of the Trinity. The days of forming and filling of Genesis 1 are reformulated into the patterns of modern Physics and God works inside these speculative parameters. Time is born before creation in this account, but even that is speculative, what is God time? what is creation time? are they the same?

I loved this, it made me think, it is highly controversial and I would say deeply flawed in its content, but nonetheless stimulating also. Thanks for sharing.

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1120
1120
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.0)
Received this via random review and I liked the space theme.

Reader Experience

Space Kid comes to earth, is a little bored until he paints a beautiful picture


Commentary

Is there one Space Kid or many. You used the singular and the plural interchangeably and so this was a little confusing. Was it a he or a they?

There are some things to correct here in order to improve the text:

Title: Bordom = Boredom

They knew that they wouldn't able to do stuff like that on Earth = They knew that they wouldn't be able to do stuff like that on Earth

which kind of surprised Space. = which kind of surprised Space Kid

let's see what their is to do here = let's see what there is to do here

Why did Space Kid have to have a brain freeze during the act of creativity which created that superb picture? Being an artist compared to being someone who enjoys watching gladiator fights to the death or gluttonous eating competitions seemed a bit of a jump.

The plot here still needs some work. Thanks for sharing.


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1121
1121
Review of Thank You, Father  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via random review and found it inspiring

Reader Experience
Upbeat and positive. I also am a morning person. A poem/prayer full of light and God connection

Commentary

You kept the structure, it was upbeat and positive and had a good focus. Loved it! Was not sure about this line: I forge the soul’s bright key,

Key for what?

Thanks for sharing all those years ago. Some stuff lasts and it does not matter when a person reads it. Other stuff dates rapidly and wears out quickly. This was something that lasts.

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1122
1122
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received via random review and stayed for the desert theme.

Reader Experience

Picture of annihilation, desolation and nothingness

Commentary

Did someone wake up with a hangover on New Years Morning? The picture is of a lifeless desert where the wind blows the sands away into the dead zones of bleak desolate nothingness. Where the dead rot, wither and crumble into the sands, without witness or remembrance. Even time loses its shape and is swallowed up into the sands of eternity.

Why are the sands graceful when the picture is so desolate, is oblivion welcome?

Got a sort of Ecclesiastes vibe off this one. "All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind"

Anyway as a I said well timed to coincide with a great many New Years Day hangovers.

Thanks for sharing


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1123
1123
Review of Beginning  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Received this via random review and stayed for its take on creation

Reader Experience

A black canvas is splattered with vomit and blood and God uses these to paint creation


Commentary

The range of necessary colors is missing with just these two resources. The power of stars is lacking in this expose. Bloodless sea creatures and reptiles and insects have no source. Pure fresh water cannot rise from these. Rich clays are not penetrated by worms here. The canvas is at least 4D not just 2D. The universe does not stink of vomit, it either does not smell at all or it smells like life, like plants growing, it smells like garden herbs and trees, a woman sweating and a child's morning breath. Not vomit! 99.999% of the universe is devoid of life so not blood either.

This one does not work for me, but thanks for sharing.

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1124
1124
Review of I.C.U.  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Received this via random review and though an oldie it seemed really topical.

Reader Experience
For me this summoned up the image of someone in an ICU in a comma or unconscious on a ventilator being visited by a concerned relative or friend.

Commentary

ICU could mean 'Intensive Care Unit' or 'I C you'. But bringing the two meanings together like this is quite clever and fits someone visiting such a place to be with someone on one of their machines. As I write many ICUs are stretched to maximum capacity by the influx of covid19 patients. But we are not allowed to sit besides those who may live or die nor hold their hands. These people are alone, and they will live or die alone, and we have experiences of both kinds of outcome. Those who died faced their Maker alone and without friends to ease those last difficult moments. This poem reminded me of how terrible the current Pandemic has been for those people alone and frightened on the brink of death and how different from our normal experience this time of passing has become.

I found one small mistake:

or what lays halfway in between. = lies or lay

Thanks for your poem.


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Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Received this via random review and found it interesting enough to stay

Reader Experience
Captain Marcono is summoned to see the King. A First Lieutenant she knows is sent to bring her. Not knowing the reason for the summons she is nervous and the news is unexpected.

Commentary
The story itself works I think and is interesting. But there were a lot of scribal errors in this text which would need correcting to improve it.

She stood up form her seat = She stood up from her seat

After that, you’ll never know what awaits for you. = waits for you.

the king is not one to be held late = the king is not one to be kept waiting

as he addressed her by her first time = as he addressed her by her first name

Her first name changes from Herana to Hernia in the story

She had already pried all she could to find something out,= She had already asked him about what was going on,

Both her and the lieutenant salutes = Both her and the lieutenant saluted

Thanks for sharing and for an enjoyable story line.


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