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1251
1251
Review of The Turtle  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hail Turtle! I found another animal tale in your port!*Delight*

*Sun*I enjoy the aboriginal philosophies of Earth and how we are one with it. Myth, stories and legends have always fascinated me so this title appealed to me. I recognize the symbol of the turtle as representing earth and have never heard this tale before. It is awesome tribute to your grandmother's oral telling that you retell in today's fashion. *Thumbsup*

It is interesting you use turtle as title as it is the underlying main character-the foundation. It does not say it all but certainly a clue.

I wonder why you left so much space between paragraphs. *Wink* Ready for a picture book? It is engaging and told in true story telling fashion in a straightforward, gentle, objective voice.

The story has the elements of a creation story and is easy to follow along. Short paragraphs are effective to give each part of the story its due. The repeated actions of the animals is a good ploy as well especially for children's tales. They can follow and predict.

I was shocked when they wanted to pull up the tree and it was scarey when she fell though the cloud to have an unexpected save. It would be interesting to know how they tried to pull her out of the hole. Kids like details--or could inspire a what do you think question.
I wonder how geese got to name her, if she was the first human and they didn't know about them Guess geese are wise.*Bigsmile*

The animals chosen for the task were appropriate and when the tiny muskrat just did his thing. How cute. it reminds me of the Bojabi tree a little as many tried to accomplish the job but the least likely one managed it. Children like this too as they can identify with being small and maybe being told they can't. Lots of messages come through a good story.

The use of a little dialogue always adds energy and drama to a story and I can see where you could add a bit more and have the story more active, then telling. *Wink*

Still, the tale serves its purpose and explains how earth came to be. I like how you had the woman hold the dirt and seeds all this time.

Thanks for sharing this moving rendition of your grandmother's tradition. A tribute and a memory so it does not get lost. *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

Eyestar
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1252
1252
Review of Coyote Waits  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hail turtle! I am back to celebrate you!*Delight*

*Sun*I spotted this animal title and it made me stop and wonder why Coyote is waiting. Good catch with the title and it reflects the theme of your poem. How patient hunters must be...

The poem topic is being told from the perspective of the one being hunted--we don't know what it is...which is an unexpected but interesting idea. It could be any prey.
Your personification is vivid as you give a potent voice to the mind inside the victim. I didn't realise til the third verse (I} that he was speaking. I went back and saw the "victim" was "unsuspecting". I think because you began with the opening line , that when you said he was waiting again in the first verse, it through me off. Now I see perhaps the first and last line are a different speaker--like a narrator looking on a coyote and its prey. Putting those in italics might clarify--it is a brilliant idea. The observer watching as the "I" voice observes itself and the way of coyote. OR it is just me. *Wink*

The complaining voice is well done in tone and hopeless but will try attitude. I like how he blames time!
If running is not an option but he doesn't give up--does he hide in his hole and resist the trap he can't resist but knows is there. he is a complex thinker.

You do a good job of allowing readers to enter your story and make conclusions and predictions and all the time Coyote waits. He is the trickster and this poem reflects it. Mind playing. *Wink*

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !{e:Rainbow

Eyestar
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1253
1253
Review of Daylight Ride  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hail turtle! I hope you are enjoying the super Port Raid from all of us at "King's Landing updating "  this weekend. I am enjoying your craft.*Delight*

*Sun*I had to check out another Ode! The title is so evocative and a delightful way to describe the day cycle. I love the dusk and it is charming how you explain what is happening as if to a child who may have asked the question and is concerned. It has a comforting tone that shows him the wonder of the change. Beautiful.

It is so well written that I actually sang it--sometimes when I read aloud music just comes with it. So thanks for that. Each verse had the some song tune and it changed a little when I got to "But, fear not" which is appropriate as you draw our attention to whom you are speaking here. *Wink*

The hint that we can't control the rhythm of this natural event is a good one for a child to know--there is something greater looking after it, for our benefit, perhaps.

The rhythm and rhyme are pleasing and flow with ease and peace. I like the vivid way you describe dusk falling: "thin veils,dim eyes, slides." The end reminded me a bit of the song "Memories". *Moon**Delight* The play on words I saw with "rays of glory" made me smile. (days of glory} *Smile* Just my wierdness.

Thanks for writing this and allowing to play with it. I love{e:s to sing and this stirred the music muse in me. {e:starstruck}

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !{e:Rainbow

Eyestar
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1254
1254
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hail turtle! I am so enjoying my visit to your port so here I am again!*Delight* You have a great variety of interesting pieces and it is cool that the art of weaving is a hobby. I also like the poet rilke and his quote. *Smile*

*Sun*How brilliant to compose the old poetic form of an Ode to the ancient art of weaving! Brings up the memories of studying ancient history in university years ago and translating odes from latin.
Oh the things we lose if we do not use. *Smile*
The title is a wonderful summary of the poem and drew me in as I thought of all the reasons he could lament. LOL

The form suits the content and woeful vibe. It is impressive how you show in great detail the process of weaving a basket in all its complex and repetitive steps. The vocabulary is relevant and the connection of weaver to his work, even when painful, is loving and allowing it to be, as you indicate by having the weaver say "my awkward child" and "my creation".

The writing mirrors the work as you use repeating words to show the "mantra" and the variety of line and verse lengths reflect the flow of the weave. I was taken with the beginning of verse 7 as it flowed and the idea of 'carousel".

Typos: '"ach I feel" needs to be "ache.."*Wink* that would certainly be a valid lament.

I wondered about "to begin with" near the end. Is it necessary and you end in preposition.

This is such a complex work much as weaving is and really shows how the process works and some of its effect on the weaver--hands. callouses, knees. etc. It is a craft that requires sustained work. The results are beautiful ..and yet you say at the end--the final product will be as the basket wills, not the creator.
Now , their is a lament! Rather like parenting. Good metaphor in my mind. *Laugh*

Thanks for sharing this outstanding and interesting poem. Keep on shining as the unique *Star* you are.

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !{e:Rainbow

Eyestar
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Review of Two Worlds  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
v*Sun**BalloonP*Hail turtle! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you in our GOT RAID!*Delight*

*Sun*This "cry for escape" is well heard by this reader! Wow. The title is evocative for the duality that haunts the speaker. Being here watching the earth be taken form itself and knowing there is another earth form more sacred. The first line is power plea for release and perhaps he doesn't care how he gets away--even to another plane. *Wink* A great hook to get me to read on and dream of options.

The imagery is vivid especially where you contrast nature with the citified areas of encroachment. I too am very saddened by "concrete fields"!*Thumbsup* I recall when they put paving on a pathway around the bay park land. I used to walk there on gravelly path and one day it was paved. I could almost hear the earth cry for breath. I mean a park right on the water and path of concrete. I got mad and then I cried.

The imagery of taking command if you could is a potent idea too as opposed to the victim of "shackle". I love the line "shackle--concrete trees"! Whew!

I wondered about the word "teaming". Great word for this concept. but should it be "teeming" or is it a play on words. eg "teeming with life" as opposed to "teaming up--as a team?" Not sure. It just struck me for a moment.

The last verse is a wish vision of what was and could be again. The prayer at the end is potent and one many pray for I am sure. It is sad to think one cannot even hear the wolf call in many places or know the simple elegance of a natural setting out in wide open spaces.

The poem was pleasant to read in its form and the voice was potent and message clearly conveyed. The concern is quite real.

Thank you so much for sharing this heartfelt plea and bringing attention to the issue. Well said! *Star*

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !{e:Rainbow

Eyestar
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Review of Ophelia  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hail Turtle! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you!*Delight*

*Sun*Wow! This poem is impressive and the famous name as a title, caught my attention. Such a tragic figure and this is a fine tribute to her being and her creator. *Wink* Thanks for the link to more info too.

It is a riveting read and the language well chosen to reflect the tragic tone, the time and the theme. So many vivid images and phrases like "willow weeps..dirge" and "cracks...cloister.." The alliterative quality adds to the flow and essence of the picture in my mind.

Your first hooked me with the dramatic short line emulating "short" life and the elegant image. In the second verse I notice right away how you create a pleasing soundscape with words that continues throughout the piece. The plight of Ophelia is retold with detail and a vibe of sadness.

The form suits the emotional and reflective content and it flowed in a coherent way. I enjoyed the read.

The last verse is summative and speaks to the part that the death played in the story--as if it was not wasted. A wise truth much like Shakespear would say. *Thumbsup*

It is clear that you have your research as you portray the essence of her life and Shakespheare's vibe and meaning. I could read this again and again--I did-just to sink into the content and recall the whole story.

I loved it and appreciate the time and effort it must have taken to compose such a complex and potent expression. Thanks you so much for sharing your vision. *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!

A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !{e:Rainbow

Eyestar
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Review of IMPORTANT!  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun*Hail angus. Enjoying your party! *Cake* Here is one more review to celebrate you. *Delight*


I like the picture of the house and your response to it is unique and inventive. The idea of being stuck there writing the same thing over---the boredom of it is scarey.

The opening line is the ending line too, which really encapsules the piece and emphasizes the repetition cycle in the content of the story. The line rouses questions as to how he got there. Good hook.

You tell the story with detail in the voice of the character and I like how it unfolds slowly. The discovery of the photo and missing the man are logical ways to set the problem. The word on the picture begins the puzzle for the character to solve. The coincidence that occurs make me think the photo has some power maybe. I wondered how the man could leave and be on a bus if he was trapped in the house and lonely. *Confused*

The dialogue is clear and adds drama to the narrative. Fantastic concept. I would love to know the backstory of this mystery and magic. And maybe he could use a new bit of story if he has to keep doing this one. Interesting how the word Important becomes key--as in the story is so important to tell over and over so we do not wind up in the same situation. yet also for the man to get some one to listen and return the photo. Double dip! Cool!

This was fun and I so enjoying partying in your port today! *Star**Candleg*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

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1258
1258
Review of Knock Knock  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Sun*Hail Angus. Happy birthday! Here is yet another gift review.*Delight*


*Fairyl* Dare I enter with a title like and your gift for dark twists?LOL
Evocative title that tells me there is punch line coming.

I really enjoyed the natural conversation that reveals the story. The dialogue and style of saying it shows your character to be friendly, chatty and messy. It is interesting that the visitor never speaks. We only know what he might have said by what the speaker responds or asks. You do it well. It would be interesting to know details like when he moves something out of the way that has been there while. Usually there is a narrative part that tells us what it was. It can be part of the intrigue of the story to leave non important specifics out.

Methinks the neighbour may have seen more than we! *Wink*

The breaks are well placed to indicate separation of the speaker with the visitor and to allow the picture to speak to give us a notion something is up. Keeping the mystery secret til the end was well done. a totally unexpected twist and I did laugh at the last line. It is not nice what they plan but struck me funny about having to take care of it for days --kinda like in hunting. *Shock*

Weaving WDC into the story as part of the speaker's life is cool and using his words as a kind of hypnotic spell is genius, true as well when we think how addicted we all get to it. *Laugh*

Some knock knock joke! Where do you come up with these scenarios? It is entertaining to read as I like natural conversation and be allowed to imagine what you do not say. Having the visitor not speak keeps a lack of real connection with him at bay and suggests noone will be the wiser in the end. Who knew him?

Creepy, for such a seemingly nice guy. *Cool* Odd kind of leprechaun too. *Shamrock* You think he'd prefer beer. *Laugh*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

House Martell image for G.o.T.
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" 


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1259
1259
Review of A Colorful Life  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Angus. I am really enjoying my visit to your port and am back again!*Delight*


It is amazing how many short stories you create and how eery they can be. This one I expected to be like that, though the colourful title belies it.

Delightful personification that takes a while to get to as you begin in such a dramatic way with death! Wow! The tale is brilliant in deception and then building the picture in a vivid way through the eyes of the crayon! I like how you have her think about her life and then her changing perspective of the sun. So realistic.

I was riveted to the read and followed with great interest and curiosity. Her narrative tone is one of observing as she tries to make sense of the deaths and how to avoid it. It is so neat how you made this like a horror story with its words like "agonizing screams" and built up to the terror and then the final line depicting the finality. I wondered how, if the crayon was the teller, how she could say tell the last line? You do have her prayer in italics so I thought she was the narrator. I could be mistaken though.*Confused*

The structure is coherent and the rising tension is potent. I like the imagery of the picture on the fridge and the last line as well as the description of the bodies in the sun. The way it is presented on the page with the shorter sentences leading to the end is effective. Easy to read too.

"the hateful evil grin" we can imagine as we have ideas of what the words mean to us. I wondered what it might physically look like in your mind.

The concept is well thought out and the title indeed is evocative.
I have seen the results of the sun in this way and never would have about writing about it. Genius. *Sun* Freaky too. LOL

Keep writing these unique expressions. This is deserving of its win in the contest. *Starstruck*


*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

House Martell image for G.o.T.
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1260
1260
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Sun*Hail Angus! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you on your birthday!*Delight*


Your title appealed to me for it's metaphysical connotations. I dig the supernatural too. Congratulations on 3rd place!*Star*

This is an absorbing tale and I followed the man's struggle with his dreams to their conclusion without losing the trail. The first line drew me in with it's immediate reactive dialogue and the vivid image of " word bounced". Wow. I don't think the word "aimlessly" is needed as it is an adverb . If it is bouncing we will imagine it going from here to there. Or instead of adverb, give us more detailed visual. Maybe watch of other places you use them.

The first scene is vibrant with clear description and the character and setting is shown naturally. It sets up the idea that this has been going on and he is not sleeping well, which may add to the outcome of the crisis later. Well done.

The progression of the plot flows well and the dialogue with the voice of the man is well developed, adds drama and helps tell the story in natural manner. It totally makes sense that in sleep deprived state and even meditation one can go beyond reality and imagine things. So it is creepier at the end when evidence seems to point to more.

The structure is coherent to me and dialogue is well done and the use of italics for separation was helpful.

The ideas in the story are creative and I like the "heart" theme. The description of the box and heart are so vivid it was hard not to imagine it. I like how manipulative the voice is and how you had to erode the dreamer's resistance by having dreams over along period . Your line ,"in his other self....he would have seen" gives a clue to the power of this dream image over his Self.

the symbolism you employ is effective and thematic. The box in a dream, reminds us of Pandora's and in our whole state would know not to open it. The promise of deliverance from a trial is used well too. The candle being the trap is cool as often it is used as meditation tool, a focus for the mind as it tries to see beyond the mind.

You really portray a spirit journey only with a dark theme. The ending is potent and leaves us with a sense of dread and question, just as the main character. What is real? and How..?

I enjoyed being entertained by this riveting piece with that eery voice at the end. You leave us wondering what will be done with it and what lasting hold this effect will have and what is in his chest now- Are we on etheric plane? I can see another story coming out---heart snatcher. LOL *Starstruck*

Impressive read. Keep it up!



*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

House Martell image for G.o.T.
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Review of WHAT THE SPELL?!?  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun*Hail Angus. I am happy to do another review to celebrate you on your birthday!*Delight*


*Balloony* The title popped with it's fantasy theme and play on words. The dramatic punctuation made me curious as well. Good choice as it does speak for the vibe of the twist at the end as well as the theme. It made me smile as I am sure it reflects the reaction of Betty in the end!

It is cool how you did a take off from the love triangle from Archie comics as a base for this bit of fantasy. I am familiar with the characters and stories so it easy to enter the scenario.

I laughed at the name of the wizard, which indicates his character in few words. The twist with the spell at the end for Betty was unexpected and a cute twist on an old tale about frogs and princesses. the wizard actually had a wise come back quip to as he saw the real problem of jealousy. Well conceived story line with a bit of humour as well. I had to laugh at the end, imagining the look on her face.

The story flowed well in a coherent manner and I only noticed a couple of missing commas. After "instantly' and maybe after "cried, as she watched..." *Wink*

I admire your ability to write episodes with such few words and use a touch of humour. Keep on sharing your gift.*Starstruck*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

House Martell image for G.o.T.
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Review of Squirrel Survivor  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Angus! I am back to review to celebrate you on your birthday!*Delight*


I like the energy and pace of squirrels as a totem animal though they can be nuisances, I know. So I had to check out your title, which does give clear clue to the content and made me think of the Game survivor. Curiosity had me wondering did the squirrel survive or did folks survive the squirrel. You give nothing away in the title.

*Laugh*This is too cute and you have portrayed the squirrel'e energy and movements perfectly, right down the way they words roll down the page. I really felt the essence of frenetic decision making and action as squirrel makes even on the road. Vivid verbs like "dodge", "weave" are strong active choices to convey variety of movements.

The personification is excellent as you have the squirrel speaking in his head. The use of exclamation points was emphatic is revealing the speed and hype of its moves and thoughts. It added to the drama and energy of the scene. I laughed at the red fonted "stop" mid stream. Good one!

The surprising twist at the end was priceless and I can just hear his response. The stop in mid sentence is potent and the caps at the punch line are effective. But ouchy! It is sad but I did laugh to imagine his dismay.

I watch squirrels around here and they do move like that whether on the road or not. Hide and come find is always fun too. This was fun to read and an amazing tale in only 55 words. *Starstruck*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

House Martell image for G.o.T.
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Review of : (Colon)  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Sun*Hail Beastmaster! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you for your efforts as Martell Sunspear and for making me laugh in the interactive! *Laugh*.*Delight*


*Laugh*Oh my gosh. I couldn't stop laughing and maybe I needed to bu this struck me so funny! You have an outrageous way of looking at things. But total sense it made. Where do you get this stuff? Where does your muse hang out? *Laugh*

This poem about the colon is expressed in a serious tone of the colon itself lamenting about its name. It is really food for fun. The ideas and connections made in every single verse made me belly laugh. eg. "heart" "apos, the trophe", "period", "boomer" etc. I won't to give things away.

The free form works for content and dramatic content and the consistent rhyme scheme assisted the flow and structure. "anatomy" and "bawdy" are off rhymes--not quite on but fit the nonsensical topic. The vocabulary suited the comparison of punctuation to body processes and parts. Brilliant conceptions. *Starstruck* It is so entertaining that the flaws in rhythm don't matter. I loved its entertainment value and it is well thought out.

Thanks for sharing your gift of humour and wonderful word craft. I had so much fun. The world needs more lightness, less constriction. *Wink**Laugh*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

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Review of DONUT  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Dave! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you on behalf of the House Martell in the"King's Landing updating " .*Delight*


Oh I have heard of this form of poem and actually did try to create some! I thought I was a fascinating and fun exercise. Yours makes even donuts look delicious. I liked the first line with the words "chock full" . I don't hear it that often so it stands out as you begin with the appealing description of donuts main attractive qualities. I love jelly and glaze. The second line evoked the image of the jelly dripping out when you take a bite. "bursting" is a wonderful word choice.
The third line gives it a sensual feel in the word choice and sound. It is delicious to say and made me think about eating it very slowly to savour it and the mess in makes on my mouth. *Smile*

In a vivid way you portray the experience of eating of a donut. People do actually talk to their food so I had to laugh at line 4! The "u' sounds in the end lines remind me of gulping. Good show! the last line say it all.
The form is delightfully laid out in colour font, which adds to the visual sense and happy energy of the expression. It is created according to the author's note and the punctuation assisted the read. I could almost here the power of the words in my head." You are going down".

Looks like a fun piece to write and I may play with it again. Thanks for sharing this taste sensation. *Cupcakeb*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

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1265
1265
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Dave! Port raid continues just to celebrate you
on behalf of the House Martell in the"King's Landing updating " .*Delight* I am so enjoying your poetry!


Incredible composition! *Shock* I have never heard of this unique and complex form which must have taken you ages to create and get right! Three poems in one balanced expression to record a true near tragedy. Very creative.

The title gives the main theme, setting and reveals the non fiction element of the piece. The author's note quenched my curiosity and reported the details. Thanks. The poem starkly tells the tale even without knowing the where and when.

This Cleave poem reflects its name and the bold letters show the split quality, which I did not really see til I researched the form. I felt that the bold letters worked somehow and quite liked the effect on the page. The black fonts helped build the aura of danger and drama.

The poem has intensity in every line as it flows in detail the occurrence in the sky. Reading it as a whole first I could imagine the event clearly. I really felt the potency in line 1 verse 2 with the impactful word "plucked from the sky". What an intriguing image! The word also refers back to the geese. *Thumbsup*

Reading the bold letters makes a story about the geese and the other half about the plane. Wow! It makes so much sense. The idea of meeting "destiny" balances with the "danger converged" of the other side of the poem. I am not sure how danger converges but it sounds cool.*Wink* Both poems flowed quite well off the tongue each tell a story, to complement each other.

As the tag line indicates, it does feel like a tribute to the powers and people that be, who saved the day. But what a ride. I can't imagine and yet I suppose it is amazing it does not happen very often.

I want to go and read more of these kinds of poems. Who knew? Thanks for teaching and inspiring as you do what you do!*Star*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
eyestar

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"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"  dave


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1266
1266
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Dave! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you
on behalf of the House Martell in the"King's Landing updating " .*Delight*

*Quill*Wow! This is a very comprehensive teaching on reviewing poetry. The title appealed to me as you refer to it as an art and indeed you illustrate that effectively in the detailed information about how poetry works. It is well organised around the premise that one must understand some of the components of poetry to know what to look for when reviewing. The narrative tone is positive and invites one to look at the process as a learning experience. I like how you introduce with the idea of love of learning and then reiterate your goal at the end. I was drawn by the first line of paragraph two by the idea of the sponge and how true we need to be open minded learners.

The page is organised under subheadings to deal with the main tools of poetry creation and what to look for in a poem. The information was easy to access and the questions posed really give good clues as to how to think about poems. The language is thematic and offers the reader some juicy words that could be incorporated into a review. Defining the terms was helpful and I really enjoyed the flow of the language. Adding metaphors assisted with illustration and to break up the teaching narrative. eg. the comparison to an orchestra, a gourmet chef etc. Really good visuals that we can relate to. *Thumbsup* The vocabulary was well chosen to reflect the topic and it was easy to read and flow in a coherent manner.

There is a lot to digest and mull over here, which mirrors what is required for reviewing poetry. *Smile* The article is a valuable resource to keep on hand, especially for reviewers who may not tend to review poetry, or even novice poets. The links to a variety of sites for poetry, styles, elements etc are a convenient addition for those who feel called to learn more. *Thumbsup* I learned a lot from reading it and especially about some questions to ask when reviewing a piece. That is vital for me, after , of course, brushing up on the elements about which you wrote. *Wink* I loved what you said about "writing our own unique responses.." rather than stale static templates. *Delight* I find sometimes I need the freedom to just allow the piece to tell me what it needs, based on what flows and is evoked in me.

The voice and tone were invitational and open and I felt the intent of a true facilitator of the art. Thank you for sharing such a relevant and needed article. It is so meaningful a contribution to WDC writers, if they have open ears to hear. *Starstruck*

I will be passing this along to some reviewers who are reluctant to review poetry.

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
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Review of Lifted high  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


*BalloonR**ConfettiP*HI ElaineElaine! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Star*

The title spoke to me as I thought of being uplifted and inspired. I read the tagline and here I am. I love dragon lore. It caught my imagination on dragon flight. the title by itself might not have led to dragon theme though.

*Dragon*I like the idea of addressing the dragon here and the dream of going beyond the now to other realms. I had a sense of the wishing and desire to leave the ordinary and a belief in ideal of that other realm.
It was fun to read and it is amazing how you rhymed every line with the same sound. Wow! You have some interesting words too and they befit the era of dragons. I like the idea of "enscrolled" and "eternity's mold" is evocative image. The conception of this line makes me wonder.

The three stanzas seem balanced and the rhyme adds to the flow. I notice the rhythm of lines is not always even but the only place that stuck out when I read it was the short "we have strolled" that didn't seem to flow as nice as the line before. Likely depends on how I read it. The other glitch for me was "where you me hold". I know what you mean but it is odd and needs tweaking.

The imagery of the dragon lair with gold sets the scene and I wondered how one could be enscrolled in dragon community--eg the use of "I am" as in present and then changed to the past in the next line.

I like the idea of dragons as wise teachers and bestowers of courage as it is a positive vision. The last line is one I am pondering. "enfold me in life" is puzzling but I will dwell with it. *Wink*

Thanks for sharing this wonderful bit of fantasy. Have a super day today. *Smile*

*Sun*Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

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Review of Nature's Grace  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun* Hail Dave! I am back to do a review to celebrate you
on behalf of the House Martell in the"King's Landing updating " .*Delight*


*Bird* Oh! I love hummingbirds and this poem brought to mind my experience of holding a hummingbird! I wrote about it too. LOL Choosing it as a symbol for your message about poets trying to capture the essence of nature is brilliant and right on! Indescribable is the beauty of this reality.

The verse was so pleasing to read with its charming rhymes and natural flow. The rhyme vocabulary is eloquent and it is amazing to have the same sound rhyme in each line. Line 5 "to the page" was a potent transition. The t words in line three give the idea of hardship especially with "try", a word that does mean 'not do"! *Smile* Alliterative too. The word "encase" is perfect as a rhyme and for its meaning. The idea of encasing grace is brilliant and impossible. It makes me happy it cannot be. *Wink*

The concept and image in the first two lines struck me as interesting as I imagine how hummingbirds mock as the writer watches it. They flutter fast and fly at high speed and emanate a kind of joy---how could one catch it?
Only in the heart, in the moment and then....*Bird*

The link on the page did not seem to work for me so I trekked elsewhere. The form is appealing to me and has all the elements of the trois-par-huit, including the title as the end line. *Salute* I am not too good with form structures myself so I so admire those who explore this wizadry.

Thanks for sharing your unique vision and craft and bringing back memories and reminding me we can merely mimic the natural world. *Starstruck*

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
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Review of Love is...  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*BalloonP* Hail Spidey! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you!*Delight*

*Sun*Your moving little poem popped up on the Random Reviews and the title reminded me of an old Charlie Brown song "Happiness is" and I heard the tone in my head. *Delight* don't ask me what Love is ..has to do with it. I still like the open ended title with it's three dots... inviting us to add our own thoughts.

The simple lines carry a wistful vibe and appealed to me with its soft voice. The images are vivid and I could so imagine the poet in this moment of reflecting on a photograph of a loved one. It could be an older person remembering a hubby passed on, or one who had a love long ago that is cherished but not to be. I like the non-specific so that reader can enter into their imagination or experience to deepen the meaning of the poem. Well done.

The ideas you chose for what love is are charming and the image of the photo in the first verse was a unique connection to love. The stars do inspire memory and space to dream.

It was pleasant to read aloud for its emotional essence and how each love image relates back to the "other' at the end of each verse. Nice balance. Punctuation assisted the read and the free style suit the theme and message.

Thanks for composing this little gem with its reflective tone and theme that can be heard by all and even inspire us to consider our own "Love is.." point of views.

Light on the path as you write on!

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

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Review of FREE YOURSELF!  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*BalloonP*Welcome to WDC Mihai! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you!*Delight*


*Sun*Your rousing title popped up on the Random Review page and appealed to me. What a energizing vibe and interesting concept that we can choose to free ourselves. After all, what can bind us unless we allow it?

The essay maintained this positive tone and is full of sage suggestions of how to access this freedom! I was reminded of the Frozen Song, Let it Go! *Smile* I related to everything you said here and your ideas are relevant and ring true.

I enjoyed reading the unique style and how you emphasize points in bold letters, which added drama. The litany of Let go statements is effective and I wonder if "let go of..disappointment" should be on its own line--or were you trying make the line similar length to the others? I like how you say to let go of the negative but also of the positive "glory" stories of life as well, to be totally present in now! Sometimes we can be just as hung up and stuck in limitation by the Good opinion of others and expectations as the negative ones. Wow! Wise knowing!

This is really motivational and I like ideas like "glow" again, and "empty vessel..emotions"
That we can come to a place of total Allowance {as I like to say} and be free to be and do anything is appealing. Even making mistakes is all in the flow.

A few pesky typos or glitches
"If you only new.." should be "If you only knew.." in line 3.
Maybe put italics around the examples you give after "repeating to yourself: {i}I failed..{/i} just to separate your words from the thoughts that may go on inside one's head.
Using {&} adds a bit of fun flair and flow. --is it popular to use in essays?
"LET GO OF YOU OLDER" needs to be "YOUR OLDER".
What is AB INITIO? I am not familiar with this.

Thanks for sharing this personal wisdom. It is a great piece to hang on the wall to remind us when we forget. We Are it! Free as we choose. Wonderful! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*
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1271
1271
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


*BalloonR**ConfettiP*HI Dan! I am here with a review to celebrate you! *Star*

I am so thrilled to find this tribute to bees and your title gives nothing away as to the topic but does give us pause to wonder what have we as a society done now, if we are curious. I was so here I am and delighted to celebrate bees with you. *Smile* You weave the wonder of bees as contribution with the growing awareness of how we have not considered their importance in the past. I liked how you made it personal by adding the speaker's own past fault in the matter. We are in it together.

the poem was fun to read aloud and while your rhythms are not always in sync the rhyme scheme is wonderful. Amazing how you have each verse has its own sound to rhyme in each of the 4 lines. Verses 5 and 7 are my favourites as the words are interesting. Imagine rhyming with "pollinate" . *Cool* The weakest rhyme was in the last verse as it wasn't exact.

I wanted to drop "our" from "boorish denial" when I read it aloud as it really threw off the rhythm in verse 5. I really liked the message about how we are messing up!

I also wondered at the word "proverbial" as it felt un poetic and heavy.

I don't think you need a question mark after "carry on" as it connects with the next line in verse 2, though you may have meant it as emphasis. *Wink*

The voice was consistent throughout the poem and the idea of speaking to the bee was brilliant and appropriate. The apologetic tone is vivid and the promise to let it live and ask it to return is appealing way to end. The speech felt natural and I had to smile in verse 3 as I can imagine the appeal to pollinate tomatoes and get away from the hoes. Following it with a 'by the way I am sorry' was effective as a bit of drama. *Delight* Fun rhyme too.

I am impressed with your crafting that speaks of a potential tragedy in a vivid way as a gentle but clear message. The links about this environmental issue add weight to it and give us an opportunity to check it out. Your message and caring is vital and appreciated, by bees and *Fairyl*s too. *Starstruck*

*Sun*Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

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Review of Our beloved God  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun**BalloonP*Happy birthday Koyel! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you!*Delight*


*Sun*Your lovely poem popped up on the Random Reads and wow! I love the prompt image! I am inspired and may use it. LOL Thanks for including it. Your response is amazing. I am not familiar with this form of poetry so I appreciate you teaching notes at the end of your poem. *Thumbsup*

The title suits the theme and lends a celestial tone of inspiration. I enjoyed reading the verses and the rhymes were interesting especially in verse 1 and 4. Wow. The weakest rhyme link is in verse 3.

The poem follows the pattern described with flair and reading it aloud was a pleasure. The enjambments were smooth and I really liked verse in 1 and 3. The word "moan" adds drama and emphasizes the vibe of whining. LOL The punctuation serves the flow of the words effectively.

You did an awesome job with using the stem word "god" as well. It is totally coherent in meaning.

The message is inspiring and relevant exploring the process of transformation. The concept of being "stone" when we forget the spirit within is brilliant. Also it fits with the prompt as your verses seem to reflect the steps to take toward remembering our "godhead" quality.

I admire the effort and time it took to conceive and create such a wonderful expression which pays tribute to the divine in us all and also to the power of humans to come to know it. It is hopeful and positive in its intent while revealing true observations.

Thanks for sharing your gift! I learn from you and may try out this form.

Light on the path as you write on!

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

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Review of Ash  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hiya alex! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you!*Delight*

*Sun*The simple title caught my attention and made me wonder about the theme--a colour, a tree, burnt wood. I like to ponder so here I am.

The first line image of the clock under the sky is beautiful, evocative and made me want to read on. I enjoy metaphors. I wonder what covered the clock with ash.

The whole piece is filled with strong imagery that brought the picture clearly into my mind.The descriptions are vivid and pleasureable to read. I liked "rusting...eyes" and the flow of the phrase with the three "un" words. Lovely. The repetition of "never" in three phrases in line two is effective too and balances with the latter. It gives me the impression of a clock counting over and over.

The paragraph is well written and flowed well when I read it aloud. The atmosphere is potent in setting, feeling, and soundscape. I especially liked line "tapping...hitting metal:" with all the "t" sounds and "fainting strains" created the music he hears.

The vibe is a sad one and the last line gives pause for thought.

I notice you need a space between "window" and "sill". You give enough detail to allow me to imagine the building in my own imagination. I had to pause and wonder what the "it" referred to in line 3 but I assume you mean the "window sill" will fall into cinders.

Lots of questions pop to mind as I read as if called to read between the lines. Who was he and why is he there?
I have the idea that we are between the two worlds somehow. You say he is unliving so he would rather be there then in heaven. AS if he is enjoying the chimes and accordion music. So existential.*Smile*

Thanks for sharing your gift and expression. It was fun to wander into your dream.

Light on the path as you write on!

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

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1274
Review of Empty Mirrors  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Sun**BalloonP*Hiya Doorman Dan! I am happy to do a review with to celebrate you!*Delight*

*Sun* Wow! I was drawn by the title to this amazing creation. Mirrors are evocative images and the idea of being empty made me ponder with curiosity. The theme is one I want to dwell upon myself now.

The writing and theme has the vibe of a lyric or song and repeating one of the verses was effective. I wondered if you had a tune in your head for it as I noticed the verses were all different lengths. Sometimes a song has balanced verses but it depends on the music. *Smile*

The tone was reflective and longing. The use of questions and pleas drew my attention to the plight and need of the speaker in a potent way. The imagery was brilliant and was my favourite part! I loved the moon, star, nebula, eclipse -space language you used to build your atmosphere. The metaphors really work ! *Starstruck* I could read this over and over as I consider your words and ideas like "the solar eclipse in my head" and the quicksand line! yep this emotion can feel just like that. etc. I like the way the mind is all over the place -- and the dramatic echo of aloneness in the "help me" lines is moving.

The song is evocative to me and the hopelessness of the empty mirror, lost to self in the mind's pain is vivid and sad. I feel like I have been there and perhaps others have as well so the theme is relevant.
The common plight is expressed in a truly original and unique way! Even the changing font size adds to the drama and delivery as I read aloud. The gray font reminds me of the fog nebula. Nice touch!

Thanks for sharing your well conceived unique expression. Made my day and made me glad to be happy. *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!

*RainbowL*A Review from "Simply Positive Review Forum " !*RainbowR*

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Review of Booster C-Notes  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Sun*Hail Great GOT Witch! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you on behalf of the House Martell in the"King's Landing updating " .*Delight*

I was drawn in to this unique set of cnotes when I read the evocative title. The word "booster" is so suggestive and fun! The theme is brilliant and really fills a need as we all have those times of doubt and shadow when a bit of light is essential. I was uplifted just strolling through your collection.

Your opening is elegant, inviting with an appealing glyph and I had to smile at the third line! It was an unexpected idea. *Laugh* I liked knowing where the proceeds go--and such a worthy cause.

Each cnote has its own flare and an inspiring message concerning writing. Using the artsy elements with words like music, imagination, and dreamer fit the theme as well. The pictures are well composed with fonts and colours that accent the images. I was not repelled by any disharmony.

The "dead end" cnote was effective wake up call. It has a strong vibe which makes me think and reconsider giving up. The Imagination one is so humourous. I reminded me of an odd way to show stress and yet make me smile and think it can't be that bad. Also it really emphasizes vividly the wild imagination that you want to highlight in the message. Brilliant! *Cool*

The Star note caught my eye with its bright colour and flowy form which emanates a joyful tone and makes a bold statement that makes me feel its truth.

I like the quill and the old fashioned picture of inspiration. Cute kitty too. One could be inspired to write something from this. Who couldn't wonder about the mail cat? LOL

The note called cheerleading is also cute and I like the old turn table! Many do not even know what this is nowadays. LOL The message rocks and I see that the last line ties into the title. I didn't get it at first when I saw the picture. But it is in the words! *Glasses*

Thoughts leading to a story is a solid advice too--as often stories come out of the misty mind chatter if we get it out.

The last message is so relevant as writing through feelings is often what writers do. Yet we can also be so stuck in it we forget to! This can be a useful gentle reminder with a kick represented by the Red colours! My POV anyway.*Wink*

Thanks for creating and sharing this positive contribution to WDC writers. It will certainly go on my favs! I can't send one to myself and already I have been inspired.

*Sun* Highest regards and light on the path as you Write on! *Sun*
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