I would love to see this continued perhaps using other still life forms to include this little essay. I love the take on your poem, your words are very moving and beautifully written. Please continue it, so charming. Keep up the great writing and welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
M Duci
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What a sweet letter to a friend in need, hope all is going well for him now. Even though it was not a very long letter it held a lot of meaning and friendly advice. I like your writing and the way you express your emotions to your friend. Best wishes and Welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
M Duci
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I must say you are a very talented young writer and I'm sure you'll go far. Your piece is very touching and beautifully worded and written. I found no errors and good luck in the contest.
Sincerely
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What a darling essay, I couldn't stop the laughter and the tears that clouded my already foggie eyes. Then came the choking on the laughter. Everything you've written you've written about me. I just rolled! I could see all the actions that you spoke of and oh my goodness I could have read on forever. Non errors and good luck in the challenge.
Sincerely
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Four wonderful lines and you've captured my heart!
I love reading the meaning behind the words spoken by it's author. Perfect. Good luck in the contest, looking forward to reading more of your work very soon.
Sincerely
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What a delightful short story! I found it amazing that someone would write a story about the appliances and which one would be the reigning queen of the kitchen. Unique.
I like the picture you painted of your characters; they came across very good. Just a few errors like
spacing but nothing that you can't fix. Great read
and I look forward to reading more of your work in the coming weeks.
Sincerely
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What an adorable little poem, I love the colors that you display and of course I must add to that your Muse, of course. Good luck in the contest and I look forward to reading more of your work in the near future.
Sincerely
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My name is M Duci and I'm one of the reviewers for
[bitem:989394}
Welcome to this weeks Newbie Challenge Contest.
The river is a restful place and you painted the
picture quite well. I could see the fish jumping, and
the river churning. Good piece and welcome Casey to Writing.Com. Good luck in the contest and looking forward to reading more of your work in the coming weeks.
Sincerely
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What a little budding beauty. I could see the womb earth moving as these tiny footprints made their way forth underground, then spring forth with brilliant colors. The colors you painted are still imbedded in my mind. No errors of any kind. Good luck in the contest.
Sincerely
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I found your short story very sad and painful. Here we
have a best friend killed by the boy friend and the boy friend being put to death for his murder.
But what was not very clear is how it came to be that the best friend or the boy friend were able to enter
Reika's home, with out her knowing? Needs a little clarification here.
'One night, Reika was awakened by a loud yell,
and in her horror, she saw her bestfriend,
Ken, at her feet.. dead.. bloody...
and standing next to Ken was
her Boyrfriend, Lei, holding a bloody knife..'
It might sound a little better if Lei was standing beside the body, instead of next to Ken. Also you might
want to separate bestfriend to best friend, and Boyrfriend should be boyfriend.
Over all good piece, keep writing and welcome to Writing.Com.
Being a native of California and living in the Califorina rain forrest there is alway that little
thought that goes through your mind in summer, will
the animals be safe should we have a fire? Your poem touched upon how it can happen so fast and blacken even faster. Your painting was quite visual.
I truly enjoyed your poem and wish you luck in the contest.
Sincerely
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Letter Home is darling, I only wish I could have
had more visual paintings! Like the weather was bliss,
but was it warm, hot, cold I couldn't see it.
The evening meal was lovely but what was on the table?
The third stanza just needs to have a little rewrite, I didn't quite get the meaning.
'Listening to the forecast of weather
We’re due for several days of sun, said her
That is one thing I’ll better remember
To include in my first letter'
Good luck in the contest and I look forward to seeing more of your work in the coming weeks.
Sincerely
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I love the beginning of your poem very much and
I understood the concept, {very beautiful} the last
stanza is where I had a little problem! It to has much
promise, I just think it needs a little rewording.
'Shines it blazing light
Makes sure what is to be,is
Something strong, everlasting
Us'
Good job and look forward to reading more of your work in the coming weeks.
Sincerely
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I thought your story very creative, amusing and it didn't scare me like I thought it would when I first started to read. I truly appreciate the effort you gave it and what was very real was the 911 operator!
I found no errors of any kind, keep up the great writing and hope to read more from you next week.
Sincerely
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I very much enjoyed your poem a 'Moment in Time'
I have been wondering the same thing as I watch
my grandchildren coming and growing. But it is they
who are growing older not I. This is quite
lovely and I look forward to seeing more of your entries in the coming weeks.
Sincerely
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I like this little dust bunny poem very much and
love the rhyme, rhythm, and flow of this little
darling. I found now errors of any kind and look
forward to seeing more entries from you in the
coming weeks.
Sincerely
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What a delightful story and of course it brought tears to my own eyes. One can never imagine how a little kindness and tenderness can go such a long way in changing the way a person thinks of them self. A lovely piece of work, and looking forward to reading more of your work in the coming challenges.
Sincerely
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What a good story you've told in so few words, I could truly feel the emotion your character was feeling as she concluded her day dream. Good job and good luck in the contest. Looking forward to seeing more of your entries.
Sincerely
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Thank you for sharing this story with us! I sometimes wonder how so much can be said in so little words.
The accounts that you speak of are accounts of war at anytime and at any price, this is one of those times. It is always so sad.
Looking forward to reading more of your entries.
Sincerely
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What a beautifully written story of such lovely imagery, There is something so very special about
an oak tree! They seem to hold so many stories and
deeply woven secrets within their long over hanging
limbs. Thank you for painting such a lovely vivid picture of this wonderful little story. The characters
were amazing. Thanks for sharing.
Sincerely
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I felt this way about all three of my son's. Now
I watch as they send their children off to school for the first time, and to see the pride that they as parents feel! Is worth the entire world to me. I love the nurturing that goes with being a parent and a grandparent. Thank you so much for sharing this lovely poem with us here at WDC. And welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
M Duci
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I like it very much and for me I don't think you
need to do a thing if you chose not to. But if you
do you could put a little color and maybe center it.
But if not that's okay also, simply great writing.
Thank you for sharing and I'll come over again sometime to visit.
Sincerely
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Welcome to Writing.Com, hope you'll find a home here
and continue to write such cuties. I am not sure if
the spelling is a part of your poem or if, it is, an over site. But your words are very poetic and I enjoyed it very much.
Sincerely
M Duci
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What a lovely tribute to the Father' in Heaven
for the wonderful life, for the goodness that
surrounds us keeping us warm and safe. To feel his love and to spread that love around the world is lovely. To share it with your family is blessed. Thank you for sharing with us and Welcome to Writing.Com.
Sincerely
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What a beautifully written poem of a poet's sad journey through life. The description was very
vivid of his road downhill. I can feel the pain
and weariness of this traveler upon life’s roads.
You are a gifted and talented writer with a wonderful
attachment to words. I love every line of this piece but these lines held my eye:
'The pencil hurts my hand
But I have adjusted to the pain'
Please keep writing and welcome to Writing.Com.
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