I really liked your poem about Yog-Sothoth. I think you have captured the essence of this being in this short cinquain. I also like that you have followed the traditional cinquain format of 2,4,6,8 and 2 syllables in the lines. Good job.
You have written an excellent little haiku about character flaws. I think you really understand this form very well, and you have followed the traditional format very well also. I see no grammatical errors or typos.
This is a really interesting and emotional poem. I love the premise and the sentiment of it. The poem has a wonderful rhythm and flow. You express yourself very well, as always. Is this based on a true happening in your life? I have several poems like this in my portfolio also.
Just a few grammatical things that I would change:
During that time her and I - should be 'she' and I
That would never be again. - I think it should be 'will' never be again.
A most viable of option - I think it should be 'options'
Good job. Keep up the good work. Best Wishes, Cynaemon
This is a nice little garland cinquain. You have done a very good job with the form and format of this kind of poem, especially with the syllable count.
Just a couple of tiny changes:
where we dared to extend our hands - should be 'which' not where
reaches out an nebulous claw - should be 'a nebulous claw'
Well, this was really a fun little puzzle about Earth Science. I think this is the first puzzle I have done on writing.com. You picked some excellent words for your puzzle, and did a good job constructing it.
There were a few typos which need to be corrected. Otherwise, good job.
People who love to go out and find fossils, rocks, and bones in the dirt, used - you do not need a comma after 'dirt'
This is an interesting little cinquain about Cthulhu. It is a character that I am not familiar with, and I wish you had told us who the author is that has inspired you. However, that does not detract from the niceness of the poem. You have done a good job with the form and format of this kind of poem.
This is a nice little five line poem about Lonliness. Although it does fit the parameters of a cinquain as far as syllable count, I don't really think it is a true cinquain. Perhaps it is a variation with which I am not familiar. Despite that, I understand the sentiment behind your poem.
Congratulations on winning the Dreamtime Dragon contest. You have written a great little cinquain which captures the essence of dragons perfectly, and you have done a good job with the form and format of this kind of poem. I see no obvious errors of any kind.
I really enjoyed reading your cinquain about mothers. It has a nice sentiment. You have done a good job with the form and format of this type of poem, sticking to the traditional parameters.
I really enjoyed your little double cinquain. It describes the picture very well. You have done a good job staying within the traditional parameters of this kind of poem. There were no grammatical or typographical errors.
This is a really nice little five line poem inspired by your love. I enjoyed it very much. However, it does not follow the specific format of a cinquain, unless it is a variation about which I am unaware. That does not detract from the nice sentiment of your poem though. Also I see no grammatical or typographical errors.
Congratulations on winning the "A Poem a Day" contest with your entry. This is really a fun little non-traditional mirrored cinquain. You have done a great job with the form and format of it. I can really relate to it as I have to be in LA traffic often.
I really liked your little cinquain about Money. I think we all feel the same way, and wish we could win the lottery. GOod luck. You have done a great job with the form and format of this kind of poem. Line two should technically have four syllables, but I won't hold that against you.
I really liked your little five line poem about laughter. It has a wonderful sentiment. Your poem does not really follow the format of a cinquain, but it is still a good poem.
Just one small typo:
all children whose delight spread like - should be 'spreads'
This is a very interesting essay on the freedom of speech and political correctness. A number of things come to mind as I read it. First of all I did not immediately think of Rush Limbaugh when I read what your bumper sticker said. Just me, I guess, but I was thinking of rush hour traffic. Somehow I got the feeling you live in L.A. LOL. Considering how unsafe things are these days I am surprised that you did put down your window and engage the other person in conversation, and I am glad that was all it was. One wouldn't be surprised for someone to pull out a gun these days.
Next, let me say 'thank you' for pointing out you are a FilipinA, not a Filipino. I am half myself, and so many do not even understand the distinction between male and female. But that really is a side issue.
I must say that I agree with you. Nowadays everything one says seems to offend somebody. I find this extremely irritating as I was in the US Army, and I fought for the very freedoms we seem to be losing. However, I do enjoy telling people "I fought to protect the freedom of even idiots like you." There is not much they can say to that.
I applaud you for writing this, and hope to see the pendulum swing back to more honesty and sanity before I leave this earth.
Lastly, just a couple typos:
did. Where did your so-called, "education" go?” - you don't need a comma after called
the tint of Islamic - should be 'taint', not tint.
I loved your little cinquain about a Dragon. I would not have thought of calling a dragon graceful, but I can really see that they are. You have done a great job with the form and format of this type of poem, sticking with the traditional parameters of the type.
I really enjoyed your cinquain poem about Folly, and I like the way it fits the prompt so well. Your poem has a good lesson for all. I also like that you have followed the traditional parameters for this type of poem.
I really liked your poem about Boxing Day. I don't imagine many people even know when the day is, or what it is. Being of English heritage, it is something that I celebrate. You have done a great job with the traditional parameters of this type of poem.
I really enjoyed your little love poem. It was a good attempt at writing a cinquain garland. I really think that the verses are more a diamante form rather than a cinquain. A cinquain should have 2,4,6,8 and 2 syllables per line. However, for a diamante garland this is great. I also liked the sentiment of your poem, and I like the way the title is also the ending line.
I really enjoyed reading your Cinquain Garland. It has a great ending. And you have done a super job with the form and format of this kind of poem, sticking to the traditional number of syllables for each line throughout.
I really enjoyed reading your poem about Legos. What an interesting subject to write about. This is a good non-traditional cinquain, and I am glad to see that you have the correct number of syllables per line. There are so many variations on this kind of poem.
I enjoyed your little non-traditional cinquain about work. The poem has a nice sentiment, and you have also done a good job with the form and format of this kind of poem. I hope you have found a better job by now.
This is another great little cinquain by you. about art. I really enjoyed your treatment of the subject. I think you have got the form and format of this kind of poetry down very well. I will have to do further research on the modern cinquain and its variations.
This is a great little cinquain about words. You have done a good job with the form and format, and stuck fairly closely with the traditional parameters of the poem. Ideally the number of syllables per line should be 2,4,6,8,2. But this could always be considered a variation, and you have done such a great job that such minor things can be forgiven.
I enjoyed reading your little cinquain about travel. I think you have really captured the essence of traveling in it. You have also done a very good job with the form and format of this type of poem.
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