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2,435 Public Reviews Given
2,435 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I try to be honest and positive. My Christian faith is an important background factor. I hate rating low but have a system that determines how I grade.
 
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My Philosophy of Rating and Reviewing Open in new Window. (E)
How do I assess people's work when reviewing?
#2259390 by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
I'm good at...
More interested in the content of what you write than the style. Theological, political, historical, scientific, or experiential, or indeed anything that paints a vision of the future. A good grammar checker will tell you about spelling and commas.
Favorite Genres
Not entirely sure as I like most stuff. I prefer something with a soul rather than purely secular. But I like Sci-Fi, anything Christian, and also 'What-if' type speculations with plausible plots.
Least Favorite Genres
Anything that fails to look for a way out of the darkness. You can be dark, just don't wallow in it. Generally, I try to steer clear of Fantasy, and most Dark or Horror stories just make me laugh or grimace due to their ignorance of the dark side.
Favorite Item Types
I have really liked some of the heartwarming dramas I have read here particularly personal stories. Thought-provoking poems or stories are cool also though I am no expert on poetical forms.
Least Favorite Item Types
Anything that is just an affirmation of the dark side. I hate empty words. I always look for human intelligence. I try and avoid Fantasy and Horror where there is no metaphorical resonance or connection with real-world truth.
I will not review...
I mainly review at random and just see what grabs my attention. I will usually skip stuff I do not like unless it gets me riled or if it is interesting for other reasons.
Public Reviews
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901
901
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to contemplate Christ on the cross.

Reader Experience

On Good Friday we remember that Christ died for us on the cross. Here we have a glimpse of the feelings of the Centurion that speared him in the side


Commentary

John 19:34 also recounts the Spear of Destiny being thrust into the side of Christ to check if he was really dead or not. The flow of blood and water that came out is also interpreted as a sign of his humanity (blood) and divinity (water). Before mass, a Catholic priest mingles a little bit of water into the wine to illustrate this. The story goes that Longinus (the Centurion) retired a little after that implying that he was an auxiliary in the employ of Pilate rather than a full legionnaire. The Legions were mainly based in Syria and Pilate only had a small force of regulars in Caesarea.

So factually there are some errors in the poem. The Centurion was not impatient for Jesus to die, he was checking if he was already dead. If he had not been they would have broken his bones to hasten death.

Also this line:

Into his hands and feet they naile = Into his hands and feet they nailed

Thanks for sharing.


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902
902
Review of my best friends  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (3.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to learn about friendship

Reader Experience

The author goes through a list of friends he has had way back to childhood. The list is fairly dynamic.


Commentary

Having three brothers made me less inclined to seek best friends though I had some in school. We lost contact when we went to different universities and had already begun moving apart before that. Your list seemed therefore as dynamic as mine since then. Moving around you meet a group of people and click with them and then a few years later are in a different place. Maybe someday I should have a party and see who comes from all these different locations. Facebook changes the dynamic somewhat as you get the news without the intimacy of face-to-face contact.

There were a lot of issues with the writing here. Capitalization, inappropriate word choices and grammar need a lot of work. There is a free tool called Grammarly which you could load and which underlines errors in red. Just about the whole thing is underlined.

Thanks for sharing.


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how did you meet your best friend?"

my best friend? do I HAVE a best friend? I suppose I do...well, I've had multiple...let's start with the earliest, and move from there...

First, there were twins, two boys name Alex and Max. At this time, I was...I want to say 6, but probably more like 9 or 10. I don't know how I met them, but I was REALLY close to these boys, and any day I could, I'd go over to their house. in fact, there were several times where I went over just to invite them to my house. They introduced me to several of their friends, and never once would they ignore me. At first, Alex seemed to fluctuate, sometimes he'd be my friend, sometimes he seemed to hate me, I could never figure out why. He soon opened up as he matured, but Max was always my friend...and still would be, if he hadn't moved away...that's when I learned how much it hurts to loose your best friend.

I had another friend named Brandon. I don't think he could truly be defined as a best friend, but he came close. maybe it was a year, maybe only a couple of months, but I was introduced to him soon after I met Alex and Max, by the two twins. He often hung out with the twins, and was often around when I was with them. After a couple of years, he opened up enough to come over on his own sometimes. but, when the twins moved away, Brandon stopped coming over.

Next on the list is Nick. A couple years ago, maybe 4 or 5, Nick moved in next door to me. I didn't meet him right away, but my sister did, and a couple weeks later, I was introduced to him. originally, Nick was good friends with Trace and J.J., who I'll get to in a moment, but after a couple weeks, he became a close friend. I rarely went to his house, but practically every day he'd come over to mine, whether it be to play videogames, run outside, or play games inside! sadly, after about a year and a half, he moved away too.

then we get to J.J. I never learned what his name stood for, but since I was too little to remember, I've been his friend. In fact, though I've never thought about it, I believe Trace was the one who introduced us. J.J. was one of Traces best friend too, and often went over to his house or vice-versa; in fact, J.J. was the one who often brought Trace over to my house when Nick moved. About a month after Nick moved, J.J. moved as well.

Then there's Trace. Trace has been my friend since I could remember. and, in fact, he was only two doors down from my house. I didn't spend a lot of time with him at first, but he came over a LOT. Once Alex and Max moved, I spent more time with him. Now, he never moved, but our interests were different, especially since he was into sports. soon after J.J. moved away, he rarely came out of his house, so we grew distant.

I DO have more friends I could talk about, but there's almost nothing worth noting. one was my best friend, but we lost contact after a year. another moved away suddenly without warning after a couple months...there ARE two that I could talk about...but it becomes a bit hard to describe what happened...or how we met...oh well, now you know my friends!


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903
903
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to learn how to dry a sweater

Reader Experience

The author dries her expensive angora sweater in the microwave after spilling coffee on it and doing an emergency wash. It shrinks and the dog gets a new outfit. Her sister is in hysterics as a result.


Commentary

I used to shrink clothes all the time and it was probably just as well that I did not own clothes that are expensive. But my son and daughter have various branded items which they care about and show no mercy if these get shrunk and so I am much more careful now.

Liked your story which was funny. Our drier broke during the pandemic and we had to hang clothes all over the house for a while. It is a very useful item to have in the house and definitely beats those ringers and washing lines they had in the fifties.

Thanks for sharing.

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904
904
Review of a zombie hangover  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (1.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for some Zombie action

Reader Experience

Zombies love to chomp on human brains. But apparently, not even Zombies will eat some brains. This Zombie discovers why when he dines in the gutter.

Commentary

It is all pretty dark and grotesque, but then I guess that is the genre. It is also a little ironic that we have a poem here from a mentally impaired dead creature. This piece reminds me of the attempts to write stuff from an orcs perspective and even distinguish between good and bad orcs. I guess the dead have quite a list of candidates to speak for them including Zombies and Vampires. I find the possibility of Zombies more convincing because people can indeed become mentally impaired. But I find the idea of Zombie poetry a little impossible for the same reasons.

Anyway, the poem worked, thanks for sharing. You asked for a low rating hence the 1 star.


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905
905
Review of Broken Tears 13  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and was intrigued

Reader Experience

Bradley wants to be a pilot. Melody is someone he knows and she leaves at the beginning driving. He had an experience at some time with his father in the airport where he met some pilots. He has just had coffee at home with Melody but walks across the street to a cafe. He was pickpocketed shortly after having had coffee. He is hit by a car. He journeys in an ambulance with a broken defibrillator to the hospital but his night is just beginning.


Commentary

Bradley is clearly having a bad day. As the saying goes when troubles come they come not as single spies but entire armies.

I found the opening here a little confusing. When did Bradley meet the Pilots? This day or in the past? He had coffee before Melody left the garage which implies at home. But someone pickpocketed him while having coffee. If he has just had coffee why is he going to the cafe?

Thanks for sharing.


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906
906
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and this sounded familiar

Reader Experience

Can we ignore the problems over there on the evening news. Can we live in our own comfy bubbles and pretend that all the pains and needs of the world can just be safely ignored


Commentary

Loved this well written poem. This was written 6 years before the corona pandemic united the world in lockdowns and economic crises. But it was 13 years after terrorists attacked the World Trade Centre and 73 days after Pearl Harbor so it seems ignoring the world has not be easy even for Americans this past 100 years. Now we have global Climate Change, Global issues like Migration, Crime, Economics and Security. That said there is only so much a person can take and sometimes it is necessary for our sanity to switch off the news. Your poem reminded me of that famous quote from Pastor Martin Niemöller here in Germany:

First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

Thanks for sharing


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907
907
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to learn about victopry

Reader Experience

Because we all want to win we will fight to the end. But as it approaches it becomes clear that only the victors will win.


Commentary

Is success and victory all important? In races I often encourage others along the way, particularly as I pass them. I remember one lady though in a triathlon was not at all happy at my encouragement and she took my encouragement as an insult on her fading ability to run the race. Quite a stream of abuse she gave from behind, though she may have boosted my time by a few seconds as I sought to distance myself from her. It is nice to win, to have the trophy cabinet fill up. But it is also nice to see my children win things and sometimes when someone is completely dominant in a race to acknowledge that and to learn from their example. I run a regular 8 mile route but was very slow 3 days ago on this (no explanation , sometime the legs just do not cooperate) and this man over took me at some pace. I laughed and told him he was "Super, Schnell" very fast. He laughed. But then I took a short cut and beat him to the next intersection. He was 10 meters behind me as I gave my victory whoop. He laughed and promptly me overtook me again. As he passed he said in German, we are like the eagle and the hare (he generously called me a hare not a tortoise). I laughed and replied, again in German, "Exactly, and for my next trick". I have run the same distance at a pace 17 minutes faster and I think then I would matched his speed or even overtaken him. But I think sometimes just enjoying the sunshine and the running is more important and everyone has an off day.

Thanks for sharing your poem which provoked these thoughts.

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908
908
Review of Say What?  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for the laughter.

Reader Experience

Mona is Lisa's mother-in-law and all your worst stereotypes apply in this case. Mona is a moaner continually pouring out the negatives about Lisa's mothering skills and little Jayden's developmental speed. And then one day Jayden surprises everyone...


Commentary

I remember well that time just before my kids could speak. We would make up sounds and swap them with each other long before they articulated any actual words. Of course there was the considered campaign to make my children's first word daddy. Failed both times! But I remember just enjoying making sounds and seeing my baby laugh and then she or he would make sounds back and smile just enjoying swapping noise with smiles.

I liked your story but it was a little unrealistic showing a self consciousness and language command of a much older kid. Still it made me laugh so who cares.

Thanks for sharing.


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909
909
Review of 02.08.2020  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to ask why?

Reader Experience

She will peel you like she would an orange and then devour you until all that is a left is a bit of peel under her fingernails.


Commentary

My goodness, remind me to stay clear from you. Which side of the Atlantic did you say you were on? This sounds like character assassination more than cannibalism. But while the rind of the orange is bitter and stains your fingers the insides are great. In fact, I love oranges. So you have a problem. However much you hate this person that orange is still going to taste delicious and is that not a redeeming consideration in the context of unpleasant peelings? Does not the sweet succulent taste of the inside of an orange wipe the memory of the bitter act of peeling?

Anyway, you seem intent on finishing that person like they were an orange to be dismantled. I have to wonder what they said to make you so angry. Did they express a preference for lemons or apples?

Thanks for sharing.


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910
910
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and was glad for the opportunity to read about this important issue.

Reader Experience

Minorities have been especially hard hit by the covid Pandemic. The relative poverty, poor and crowded housing, jobs involving social contact, and a lack of resources to take leaves of absence are all blamed for this disparity. He discusses various options to help these communities through the Pandemic including lockdowns and handouts.


Commentary

A lot of commentators have echoed your sentiments on this theme and obviously, racial inequality and discrimination is the big issue in the news right now. On the right, the argument goes that these people are the victims of their own choices. They are poorer because illegitimacy in the black community makes an overwhelming number of families single-parent ones, with reduced opportunity, and this also helps explain why they do not do so well in school. Black people have been statistically more prone to obesity which makes them more vulnerable to Pandemic-type conditions.

That said the overwhelming factor here is the legacy of slavery from which Black people have not yet fully recovered. Breaking the hold of slavery and slave mind influences black people means giving them better opportunities to earn a living and get a nice place to live. Positive discrimination in favour of black people comes against that backdrop. Black people do not have to be victims only they can be president or CEOs. Marital stability and revised attitudes towards sleeping around would also reduce the poverty factor related to broken or single-parent homes as the context for rearing children. Also, Trump did actually do some good things addressing injustices in the criminal justice system which made it statistically more likely that a black man would be convicted and serve a longer sentence than a white man. But there is still a disposition in the police and criminal justice system to believe that black men stole that car and are more likely to be dangerous. Large-scale possession of firearms in gang-type inner-city situations with black men recruited into criminal and drug-related situations has not helped either. They need better opportunities to avoid recruitment in the first place.

There are some sentences here that need reviving.

The stats show that African Americans are 1.4 times to die from the virus = The stats show that African Americans are 1.4 times more likely to die from the virus

With all these factors and weighing down minority groups,= With all these factors weighing down minority groups,

If the continued trend of these communities is hit harder than others =
If the trend continues that these communities are hit harder than others

Thanks for sharing, you have the beginnings of a very interesting piece here.


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911
911
Review of Joyous Spirits  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for an experience of Christmas in April.

Reader Experience

Christmas is about cold weather, warm drinks, happiness, carols, and about the One who bestows life and the promise of heaven


Commentary

Did not really feel this understood Christmas. There was a considerable amount of culture-bound imagery relating to snow and warm drinks for instance that Australians might not understand for instance as Christmas is in the middle of Summer there. Globally not everybody does carols at Christmas even in the Western world where this tradition began. Christmas time is about a child who is both God and man and demonstrates the love God has for us, by coming to share in our humanity. His presence and this birth are greeted with great joy, sung about by angels, and offer hope to those who are poor or oppressed that a greater hope has been born into this world. The Kingdom of darkness can be overcome because God is with us in Jesus Christ the promised Messiah who fulfills the prophecies and shows us the way.

Thanks for sharing.


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912
912
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to meet a more shapely version of ET

Reader Experience

Matthew O'Reilly sees a pretty girl that looks like she is from outer space and pursues with coffee in hand. His attempts at intergalactic diplomacy are compromised by clumsy social skills and the suspicion that this might be a comeback for a previous prank on his friends. So having burnt her with coffee and been pinned to the floor with her foot on his neck he finally realizes the joke has been on him after all.


Commentary

OK, this does raise all sorts of questions about why Matthew should have been singled out for a visit from ET rather than me. What has he got that made him so interesting when viewed from outer space. What communications or special characteristics so intrigued this alien visitor to risk coffee burns and sexual harassment at the hand of this earthman. Anyway, his romantic intentions come to nothing and she departs in quite a spectacular style leaving him realizing he has blown his biggest chance of some kind of mind-expanding, mind-blowing, and truly exciting relationship with ET.

Thanks for sharing.


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913
913
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for some reworked Greek mythology

Reader Experience

Marpessa and the author both opt for human beings as partners over the gods. The author contemplates sharing cookies and coffee to discuss their choices.

Commentary

Idas was actually the son of Poseidon and so a demigod I suppose. Probably explains some of his hero prowess. Poseidon's chariot was definitely not on loan to mere mortals. But he like Apollo in fact is not around now so maybe immortality and god status have been misdefined in the old greek myths somewhat. But the choice to marry a mortal over a god requires some kind of explanation. The author suggests that because we live with the prospect of death somehow life is also enhanced. Not sure that would be the reason I would adopt. Marrying a goddess would mean I was always second best in a completely unequal relationship where my partner was perpetually beautiful, youthful, etc and I was doomed to die. I think sharing one's life with an equal probably means aging together to some extent.

Thanks for sharing.


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914
914
Review of Atomic Fire  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)

Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to discuss open-air nuclear testing.

Reader Experience

The Trinity A-Bomb test on July 16th, 1945 near Alamogordo, New Mexico created Trinite (green radioactive glass). It also marked the emergence of the nuclear age and the Cold War ideologies of East and West.


Commentary

It is unbelievable today that they used to do this in the open air. People would watch the explosions from Vegas. They would collect the glass as jewelry before they knew how radioactive it was. Apparently, they bulldozed most of this in 1953 and buried it under the desert so it is still there warming the sands from underneath. Not sure that it was just nuclear weopans that defined the emergence of the Cold War ideological conflict. The race-based European empires were destroyed by the war against the race-based ideology of Nazism leaving just the USSR with its version of Communism and 50000 T-34 tanks and the USA with its overwhelming economic power and air and sea supremacy. But nukes may have stopped Stalin from finishing the job in Europe and just invading the rest. They ended the war earlier in Japan.

I liked your poem which provoked all the right questions about the success of the Manhatten project in a down-to-earth (or glass) way.

Thanks for sharing

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915
915
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.5)
As discussed, raised your rating.

I liked your story and maybe this is just subjective and my mark was a little harsh (I will change it to 4.5 stars). I am content orientated in my reviews. Stylistically you have little to improve there. But I felt this one lacked detail. For example, the Rotterdam fly-by occurred in July 2016 a month before the airforce version (F-35A) with the larger wing entered service. The variant that flew by was the F-35B which was a Marine core version with the VSTOL capability for example and it was flying with an F-16 escort. That was interesting to me, does that mean it was carrying no armaments for instance? The aircraft has had so many teething problems but I understand the excitement about it. Once it is established technology and bug-free it will be a more potent complement to Western airpower.


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916
916
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed because I love combat aircraft

Reader Experience

They missed the airshow and so they never got a proper chance to take the pictures of the Lockheed Martin F-35 Lightning II.


Commentary

In the UK I used to live near Farnborough where there was a regular military airshow every 2 years. I would cycle 25 miles to the airshow, watch it and then cycle 25 miles back. I remember falling in love with classics like the SR-71A Blackbird there. I saw a Raptor and a B1 bomber. I saw the Red Arrows with their Hawks and even a helicopter explode on the runway after a malfunction in mid-air. I loved it and my friends and I were never dependent on my parents to take me there.

The Lightning was meant to be a one-stop-shop for all the military services. Maybe they tried to do too much with one aircraft. The latest modular business practices were incorporated. But this has been a financial disaster with massive cost overruns. There are more than 8.8 million lines of code in its software and it is so complicated it takes an average of 172 days to fix one. As a result, availability is well under the 65% Fleet requirement. The numbers of errors are being steadily reduced but it will be a while until this aircraft is bug-free and truly combat-ready. To be honest I am a little disappointed with it so far. The British Royal Navy was sailing massive new carriers without aircraft for a while as a result having scrapped their GR9 Harriers way too early in a cost-cutting exercise.

Anyway thanks for sharing. You should have gone to the airshow.


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917
917
Review of Terror  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to fight the war on terror

Reader Experience

The roots of war and terrorism lie in poverty, despair, and hopelessness. It is easy to convert these people to violence and a makeshift creed that some call Islam. Religion becomes the revolution and the resistance against the privileges they do not enjoy.

Commentary

Many of the 911 terrorists were well educated and from well-off families. Many poor people live exemplary lives. To use poverty as an excuse for murder would be bad as using selfish ambition. The fact is most of the terrorist groups in the world today are Islamic in origin. It is a contentious subject in the Muslim world as to whether they are true Salafists keen on returning Islam to the "purity" of its beginnings. After all, Muhammed waged continual warfare and massacred the men of an entire Jewish tribe for instance. Islam itself expanded by conquest and it is secured in the countries it dominates by a violent minority of whom many of the others live in fear. Under Empire, there might have been a case to suggest Islam was the resistance but without the levers of social control in many countries, it lost ground. Despite that much of the trouble in the British Raj came from Muslims rather than Hindus. The Mujahadeen were trained by the USA to fight the Soviet Occupation of Afghanistan and in the form of the Taliban are still fighting there. Personally, I think these jihadists capture the essence of original Islam and explain why it is so unattractive to people who know either the truth of Christianity or the freedoms of the Christian West. As an oppressive lie, it fits neither group's agenda. The Muslims I have met, that have come here to Germany, are often quite broken by their experience of cultures torn apart by factionalism in the name of Islam and the clear abuses of God's name that have taken place. They come to us seeking refuge and I guess we should pray they never forget the misery from which they came. Many of these, but not the majority, have become Christians or atheists.

Islam is dominant in many of the countries where it is fighting itself. It explains why the majority of people around the world would not want to live under Sharia law

Thanks for sharing.


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918
918
Review of Absolute Zero  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for a masterpiece made out of ice and romance

Reader Experience

Dancing sunlight in a world alive and free is replaced by frozen ice sculptures and empty hearts. Until your beauty is only a frozen memory that has lost its magic.

Commentary

Loved the poem which has already been lauded and well received by many. I appreciate the contrast between summer and winter, freedom and frozenness. But I have enjoyed the freedom of mountain snows also and the white wide-open vistas and it is possible to work up a sweat even in such inhospitable landscapes. Romance can live in an igloo or out under Summer stars. It can die on sun stroked beaches or in a snowdrift that buries all traces of a place we once loved.

Thanks for sharing


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Review of Finding Pharaoh  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to discover the tomb of Hatmetushep.

Reader Experience

Hobbs the archaeologist has dedicated his life to the search for the lost tomb of Hatmetushep. When he finds it quite by accident in the desert he is overjoyed and the first to go into the tomb. But then in Indiana Jones fashion, the trap is set and a great stone block prevents his exit. Then there is a voice from Hatmetushep's tomb!

Commentary

Think it would have been scary in the context. Obviously this guy does not watch enough TV or he would know that only bad things happen when you enter tombs so laden with treasures. Egyptian pharaohs fancied themselves as being on a par with the gods and spent their lives and much of Egypt's wealth on preparing for the afterlife. Of course, Hatmetushep might just have been a mob boss who was pretending to be a Pharoah. He never got a tomb because he never was one. If you google his name you get a lot of Russian speculation about gangster origins and maybe some video game pictures also. Not really definitive evidence the guy ever existed really.

But I enjoyed the story thanks.

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Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for my favorite drink

Reader Experience

Coffee time brings back memories of childhood incidents, mum and dad drinking it, coffee before mums poetry, and other delicious coffee laden experiences


Commentary

I do not drink, smoke, do drugs, or sleep around but hey do not touch my coffee! Some addictions are just too good to lose. My father always had it with milk and so do I, my mother always preferred a good cup of tea. The national stereotypes are all overthrown as my father was born in India where they drink tea, My mother is half American where they drink coffee and throw the tea in the sea. Now I live in Germany and am expected to drink tea because I am English but I prefer coffee. It is an excellent way to start the day and to suppress my PDE levels.

Thnk this sentence needs work:

I have drink at least three cups of hot coffee = I have drunk at least three cups of hot coffee

Thanks for sharing

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I have drink at least three cups of hot coffee


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Review of Amid the Corn  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button

Reader Experience

An unmarried couple in a moonlit cornfield just before harvest and after a big party. It could so easily have had a non-Amish ending.


Commentary

Actually, the ending was a welcome surprise, given the Amish background, though you do not make it clear why he grimaced and drew back. The implication was that it was conscience that made them realize they were doing wrong. But maybe he just decided he did not like her, the text was not totally clear.

Thanks for sharing.


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Review of Auschwitz  Open in new Window.
Review by LightinMind Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and I have been to Auschwitz

Reader Experience

Auschwitz!


Commentary

To describe the horror of Auschwitz we need a masterpiece but this was not it. 1.1 million people, mainly Jews died there. Even today the horror of the place challenges us with the question of how people could be so evil and do so much wrong? If you go there you will see the pictures of lampshades made from skin, the piles of handbags of teeth with gold fillings that were extracted. Many were worked to death others exterminated with Zyklon B. I am a chatty person but I walked away from there in horrified silence. It has provoked serious questions about how we can talk about God and goodness after Auschwitz and yet these are still here and indeed could we feel the horror of such evil if we did not believe in them.

There are some really awkward phrasings in this piece like you "made me despaired" and some spelling mistakes also e.g. dispaired is despaired.

After the Nazis, people got real again and modern Germans are far from being the kind of people who committed these crimes 3 generations ago. Though they still take this episode in their history with total seriousness. We remember so that it will never happen again.

Thanks for sharing.

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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for inspiration

Reader Experience

Apparently, it is party time, a time to eat and laugh. It is a time to love and to reach out even though we are socially distanced from them


Commentary

Party time has definitely been on hold this Pandemic and much of the entertaining, fun trips and get-together are fading into memory after a year of lockdown. But as Britain is now mostly vaccinated I notice my family there starting to think about what normal life might look like once more. In fact, I asked my dad that as he gets his second vaccination in two days.

"So what will you do when you are free to be normal once more?"

There was no answer. I want to travel more, see my family, sing my lungs out in worship, hug people in the church and hang out with some friends in the pub. I want to visit people who have been more isolated than me this year. I think the sentiment of this poem is spot on and even now we have much to be thankful for and to be happy about. I found the style a little cliched but maybe that is just me. The opportunities to reach out do exist over the phone and online through Zoom and Teams and other technologies but they will grow as this pandemic finally fades.

Thanks for sharing


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Review of Desire  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed to hear about temptation

Reader Experience

Joanne succumbs to temptation.

Commentary

We have all been there and must admit chocolate is a weakness of mine also. My Easter eggs are always the first to go. But I notice that my son's eggs are still sitting in the Dining Room like he does not want them. I wonder if he would notice if just a few eggs disappeared? I think I would get away with it, who would know after all? Oh, bother did I say that out loud? It seems a strange place to keep chocolates by your bed if you are trying to resist the temptation. After all, it is a pretty easy place to reach out to them.

The repetition of the "it was no good" phrase irked me a bit.

Thanks for sharing, do you also share your chocolates or scoff them all yourself, just asking.


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Review of A New Beginning  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Received this via the random 'read & review' button and stayed for a modern take on the Tinderbox by Hans Christen Andersen

Reader Experience

A tormented war veteran finds some money and a mysterious code. He is hunted by people who seem to know the meaning of his find. They hold the beautiful Juanita captive. Having overpowered her captives and despite having been shot in the process they enter a church to find a mysterious box. The story continues...


Commentary

Well, I guess the witch becomes the two men, the princess is Juanita and the box is the one found in the church. We are just missing 3 supernatural dogs and some regicide from the original tale. The original story was not that popular as it was regarded as lacking morals and I guess killing a king who was just looking out for his daughter did not help the author much. I liked your version which converted many of the key themes into the modern context. The motorbike did its supernatural thing before John came into possession of the box which was presumably the powerhouse of the magic. Technically there was no explanation as to why it should do that.

You managed to give it a bit of moral weight with Johns's generosity to the nun and his saving Juanita from her kidnappers. Also, you put the box in a church rather than in the more menacing place of the original tale guarded by monstrous dogs. But John's war experience and loss of comrades in arms seem to have made John a little disillusioned about God. There was an implicit message here that even if John no longer believed in God, God was still looking out for him. I think the original readers of the original story may have preferred your version to Hans Christen Anderson's version if that was the underlying message.

Thanks for sharing.

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