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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

Hi Gervic, I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Touch Me Once More" Open in new Window. by Gervic

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A unique rhyming scheme with the 1st 2 stanzas and none for the last one. This works well for this poem and gives it a nice flow.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:A love poem in dream form.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: Structure looks good I can see no problem with the grammar or mechanics .

Gevic, thanks for sharing this delightful love poem, it is a good read. I sure did enjoy it.

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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Review of Heaven And Hell  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

Hi dogpack:saving 4 premium:DWG! After reading "Heaven And Hell" Open in new Window., I offer you these comments:


My impressions of: "Heaven And Hell" Open in new Window. by dogpack:saving 4 premium:DWG


Clarity, does the title describe this story?:A good title for this inspirational story .

Style: personal spiritual view.

Genres, are 3 listed? Inspirational, Educational, Personal

My two cents: dogpack, thank you for sharing this well written and informative testament. I have enjoyed reading it and in agreement with pretty much everything you said.

My favorite line:---God does not want puppets therefore we have bee given the gift of free will.---

A strong inspirational work. Well chosen words that give this work a powerful flow.




Structured easy for the reader? a well constructed article however a little more line spacing would help us readers with weak eyes.


Any suggestions?Consider a stronger opening to better ground the readers attention . Perhaps double spacing with the extra line between some of the longer paragraphs would make it easier to read and less intimidating for a potential reader or browser.

Write on!
Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hi Ravi ! After reading "The curse became a blessing" Open in new Window., I offer you these comments:


My impressions of: "The curse became a blessing" Open in new Window. by Ravi Ranjan Goswami


Clarity, does the title describe this story?:A good title for this tale.

Style: Mythological fantasy drama.

Genres, are 3 listed?Drama, Folklore, Cultural

My impressions:: Well written tale with good characters and descriptions. A curse backfires and makes the prince young forever.

Ravi thanks for sharing this entertaining folktale it is a good read.


Structured easy for the reader? More line-spacing and a blank between paragraphs would make it easier to read for us older weak eyed ones.


Write on!
Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "LOST SPIRIT OR ANTIE'S BEDTIME TALES III" Open in new Window. by CBH

Does the title describe the story? A good title however does not really describe this chapter.

What is the style? History, folklore.

Are there 3 genre listings? Folklore, Supernatural, History

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening. Could be stronger to grab the readers attention.

Is the structure good for the reader? A nicely laid out story. It would be easier and less intimidating for the reader if it had line spacing.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:CBH thank you for sharing this informative story. I have enjoyed hearing some history from a different country therefore all new for me.

A well written story, very informative on some Moroccan history.

In school most of us learn mostly history from our country and know little about the rest of the world's history, therefore this is all new to me and I really enjoyed it.

Well-worded story, I especially like the way that you did the ending.

If I had to make a suggestion:Consider line spacing or even double spacing to make it easier on us older readers, who's eyes are getting weaker. Perhaps break the long paragraphs down into shorter ones this looks less intimidating to a browser or potential reader.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)


Hi Carly! After reading "Freedom on Route 23" Open in new Window., I offer you these comments:

My impressions of: "Freedom on Route 23" Open in new Window. by Carly


Clarity, does the title describe this story?:A good title for this story.

Style: Personal travel drama.

Genres, are 3 listed? Travel, Contest, Other

Plot: An adventure for a young couple on route 23 from upper Michigan to Florida.

This entertainment story reads as a true story, I just wonder if it is since it was also a contest entry.

Well written and very good use of the prompt words.
I hope you won the contest.

Characters:Rye and Carly.

Structured easy for the reader? A good structured story that is easy for the reader.


Any suggestions?None.

Write on!
Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "QUINTANILLA \PEREZSELENA/UNA" Open in new Window. by Captbike

Does the title describe the story? A good title that somewhat describes the contents of the story.

What is the style? biographical true story.

Are there 3 genre listings? Other, Biographical, Activity

Does the opening line grab my attention? A good opening however could be stronger to grab the reader's attention.

Is the structure good for the reader?A good structure. More linespacing would make it a bit easier for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Nicely written and very informative article.

I have heard of the death that ended her career. This is the first account of the aerobics story that I have heard.

Captbike, thank you for this informative article. I enjoyed this knowledge.

If I had to make a suggestion:Consider a stronger opening to better grab the readers attention. A bit of line-spacing would make it easier and more appealing to a reader.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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632
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
My impressions of:"The White House Against Minorities" Open in new Window. by Anna Mare Carison.

Hi Anna I came across this article while random reviewing. I'm gonna say I'm pretty much in complete agreement with everything you said.

Politics indeed is a sore subject that personally I try to just stay away from because everybody has their own view and there's no changing it that I can do. Well that's my mind set, it might be wrong but indeed it is a sore subject.

It seems that you can take any good person with good intentions elect them to office and in no time flat there a politician and forget all that brought them to office.

In this well written article you hit many good points that are absolutely true.

Anna, thank you for Sharing this strong article it has got my mind to spinning.

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo. WRITE ON!


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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

My impressions of: "Fantasy World Build To Be Named" Open in new Window. by diademedaid

Does the title describe the story? This title works for this unique Sci-fi adventure tale.

What is the style? Sci-fi fanfictiod outline.

Are there 3 genre listings? Fanfiction, Folklore, Sci-fi

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening for this work.

Is the structure good for the reader?Nice structure, easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:diademedaid, thank you for sharing this unique sci-fi outline. It has given me ideas. :)

A great job for this detailed outline, I feel sure you will find it most useful for probably a series of chapters and stories.

I really like the idea of "Electricity Possession".

A well thought out and written outline that I'm sure will result in an epic adventure.

KEEP WRITING.


If I had to make a suggestion:None

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Hi JCosmos I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Down in the Dirt poetry" Open in new Window. by JCosmos

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:Great work, this collection of poetry is awesome.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: my name , it is nobody .... I like this poem the best I think.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: naturally no problems at all with the mechanics . JCosmos, thank you for sharing this strong work of poetry this Reader has thoroughly enjoyed it .

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)

Hi elisabeth I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "a death long since forgotten" Open in new Window. by elisabeth

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A short para normal story about a dark mysterious place, a nursery in an abandoned old farmhouse.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: Well described, this story paints a picture for me of a baby bed in a haunted room filled with evil spirits. In a few words this short story says a whole lot.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: Well done, this unique story sets its own boundaries.

Elisibeth thank you for sharing this powerful story. It has got my head to spinning.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "Through the Forest Through the Trees" Open in new Window. by Gman

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this work.

What is the style? personal philoposhy

Are there 3 genre listings? Spiritual, Self Help, Adult

Does the opening line grab my attention?The opening line does get my attention.

Is the structure good for the reader?The structure would be easier for the reader if it was double spaced and maybe a extra line at the end long paragraphs.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Gman, thanks for sharing this deep philosophy I have found it a joy to read.

In life we all get fed up at different times, I feel that most people can relate to your words I know I can.

This is a strong and deep work. Well laid out and well worded.



If I had to make a suggestion:Consider line spacing and perhaps double space, this will make it easier for the reader.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review of Big Yellow Moon  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

My impressions of: "Big Yellow Moon" Open in new Window. by Winchester Jones

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this story.

What is the style? Personal drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Contest Entry: Even though a contest entry this story would be available for more browsers if all 3 genres are used.

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening, however it could better grab my attention.

Is the structure good for the reader?Well structured. Easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Winchester thanks for sharing this unique story. It is a good read.

Well-written and worded with good descriptions that make it easy to picture the scene.

A nice ending.

If I had to make a suggestion:Consider a stronger opening. To catch the readers attention from the start.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review of Vernal Equinox  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Hi m.alice I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Vernal Equinox" Open in new Window. by m.alice

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A well-written free verse poem.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:Strong emotional poem. We learn by trial and error this poem describes a learning experience.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics:Nicely structured and worded poem.

m.alice, thanks for sharing this well worded poem, I have enjoyed reading it.

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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Review of The Last Act  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)

My impressions of: "The Last Act" Open in new Window. by brom21

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this story.

What is the style? Mythological fantasy drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Fantasy, Environment, Emotional

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening. Could be stronger to grab attention.

Is the structure good for the Reader?Great job with the structure and dialogue this makes it very easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion: brom21, thanks for sharing this entertaining tale. I have enjoyed reading it.

Well-written tale with great descriptions and detail. This helps the reader to get into the story better.

Strong characters speaking with realistic dialogue for each one.

Well described action keeps this story moving with a good pace while holding the readers attention.

This is a strong story with a great flow that held this readers attention great.


If I had to make a suggestion: Consider a stronger opening line to catch the reader's attention faster.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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640
640
Review of Timber  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
My impressions of the poem:"Timber" Open in new Window. by Kevster

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A well-written poem with a nice rhyming pattern.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: Good descriptions I can picture Timber.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: Nicely structured poem with a nice flow.

Kester, thank you for Sharing this unique poem, this reader has enjoyed it .

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

My impressions of: "Is This Thing On? (1st Place)" Open in new Window. by BScholl

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this story.

What is the style? Inspirational drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Inspirational, Activity, Philosophy

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening, how ever it could better draw my attention.

Is the structure good for the Reader?Nicely structured. Easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:BScholl, thank you for sharing this work has been a joy to read.

My favorite line--The past is now written in stone--

A well written and nice article. Reads like it could be and true story. Well done.


If I had to make a suggestion:None.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
642
642
Review of Fugitive  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "Fugitive" Open in new Window. by Beholden

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this story.

What is the style? Sci-fi fantasy drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Steampunk, Fantasy, Philosophy

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening line, however it could grab my attention better.

Is the structure good for the reader?Nicely structured, easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Beholden, thank you for sharing this deep story, it has been a joy to read.

A well-written story constructed in a good timely fashion.

Good characters, I like Kate and found her to be a realistic character.

Good dialog that helps the reader get into the story.

A good ending that leaves the opportunity to expand
the story-line into more chapters.


If I had to make a suggestion:Consider a stronger opening to grab the readers attention quicker.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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643
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Review of I am Beautiful!  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi happy to write, I came across this beautiful poem while random reviewing. Thank you for sharing this work this reader has thoroughly enjoyed reading it.

My impressions of the poem:"I am Beautiful!" Open in new Window. By Happy to write.

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: This unique poem is very strong the emotion can be felt while reading it.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: "I am beautiful because" A great idea for this strong work.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: This poem moves in a nice timely fashion giving it a unique flow.
It is funny how our weaknesses do make us stronger.
Well-worded with a realistic learning tone. Humans learn from trial and error, always have all through history.

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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644
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

My impressions of: "Confessions of Calus" Open in new Window. by kc

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this adventure story.

What is the style? mythological fantasy drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Action/Adventure, Fantasy, Political

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening line however it could grab my attention better.

Is the structure good for the Reader?Nice structure however a little more lines-spacing would help the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:KC thank you for Sharing this is awesome adventure tale this reader has enjoyed it.

Well written story with strong character and good dialogue.

Good descriptions that help the reader to visualize the scene.

Seems like a good introduction for an on going adventure book.


If I had to make a suggestion: Consider experimenting with a stronger opening line and more of a cliffhanger ending to make the reader want to turn the page. Double spacing with an extra line break between some longer paragraphs would make it easier for the reader and more appealing for the browser.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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645
645
Review of The Bank of Ganga  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "The Bank of Ganga" Open in new Window. by Ameliorating

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this work.

What is the style? Philosophic personal drama.

Are there 3 genre listings? Nature, Experience, Philosophy

Does the opening line grab my attention?A nice opening line.

Is the structure good for the Reader?A nice structure. This makes it easy for the reader.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Ameliorating, Thank you for sharing this unique celestial story. This reader has enjoyed it.

This well-written story reads much like a free verse poem. From this story a nice poem could be written.

A lot of good philosophy and descriptions here however it could confuse most of today's readers with their short attention span. They don't like going back to reread to see if they missed anything.

I went back and reread and to me it's still reads more like free verse poetry. I like poetry but was expecting a story. I know from personal experience the river does inspire creativity.


If I had to make a suggestion:Consider a stronger opening that's not quite as wordy. A good proofread and edit never hurts. Personally I feel this story could be shortened without losing any of the message. It seems to crowded with descriptions. That is just one opinion.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon


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646
646
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "Pan-G Britain Cups And Domestic Football" Open in new Window. by Wrexgor

Does the title describe the story? A good title for this article.

What is the style? Sports opinion article.

Are there 3 genre listings? Sports, Other: By listing three genres your work will be found by more people who are looking for that genre.

Does the opening line grab my attention?A good opening line.

Is the structure good for the Reader?The structure would be easier to read with line spacing.

My two cents worth is only one opinion:Wrexgor, I came across this article while random reviewing. Thank you for sharing it it is a good read.

A well written article and I would agree with most all of it.

If I had to make a suggestion: consider double spacing and maybe making the font bigger. This will make it easier for the reader.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!

Joseph

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
647
647
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi elisabeth, I came across this artistic poem while random reviewing.
I hope you find my impressions helpful.

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:"I want to be loved by an artist" Open in new Window. by elisabeth.

A nice artistic flow from this free verse poem.
Well structured, this helps the reader get into the poem.


Artistic Voice and Imagery:" the fingers that entwine perfectly with their own." this is my favorite line.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: Well-worded giving this work that unique artistic flow.

Elisabeth, thank you so much for sharing this beautiful poem it has been a joy to read.

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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648
648
Review of Opherin--a ballad  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
My impressions of the poem:"Opherin--a ballad" Open in new Window. by Ryyssa

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:Well-worded with a nice unique rhyming pattern. Nicely constructed with a musical tone.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:A mythological theme that works great in this poem.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: Nicely constructed especially considering 80 lines, well done.

Rhyssa, thanks for sharing this entertaining poem, it has been a joy to read.

Thank you for sharing your story. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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649
649
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)

My impressions of the poem:"Tell Me About Your Heart, Please." Open in new Window. by p.b.sandwixh

Clarity: A good title for this poem.
Style: Relationship poetry.

My 2 cents is only one opinion: p.b. sandwixh, thank you for sharing this unique poem. I have enjoyed reading it.

Well-written poem that is both emotional and humorous,
those two are hard to combine. Well done.


Write on! Keep on writing!
JosephOfficially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
650
650
Review of The Boogiecat!  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

My impressions of: "The Boogiecat!" Open in new Window. by My Sox Are Green Don't pinch

Does the title describe the story? A great title for this story.

What is the style? fantasy pet folklore

Are there 3 genre listings? Pets, Supernatural, Folklore

Does the opening line grab my attention? The title does grab my attention pretty good.

Is the structure good for the Reader? A fair structure for this short story.

My two cents worth is only one opinion: My Socks are Green Don't pinch, thank you for sharing this unique fantasy tale, this reader has enjoyed it.

I don't want to see the wrath of the boogiecat.
A unique idea for this tale.

Never bark at a cat without wagging your tail first, good advice.

If I had to make a suggestion: Even though this is a short work, consider breaking it up into shorter paragraphs to make it easier for the reader.

Thank you for sharing your work; that is a major step in writing.

WRITE ON! GOD BLESS YOU. Keep writing!
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Joseph

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