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526
526
Review of Swallowed  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hi Ton, I came across this story while random reviewing.

My impressions of:"Swallowed" Open in new Window. by Ton

Clarity:The title's for each chapter seem good, Not sure about the main title.

Writing style:Mythological fantasy friendship drama.

My favorite line:--- Seeing his strong, comforting presence brought a glimmer of hope to Elias's heart.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written tale with strong realistic characters that are likable. To bad about Elias.

A good opening that draws the reader into the story.

Nicely structured story. This makes it easier for the reader and more inviting for a browser or potential reader.

--The deed was in minutes.-- I think you may have left a word out and this sentence.



Ton, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: a good proofread and edit to catch any typo's or left out words, never hurts. Consider putting the chapters title in bold and then skipping a line before the content. This will make it appear better to the reader. This reader didn't quite get the title.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
527
527
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hi Jeff, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"The Eternal Optimist" Open in new Window. by Jeff

Clarity: The title fits the story well.

Writing style:Family adventure drama.


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: Yes it sounds like your dad is the eternal optimist. I hope he don't have to get the kayaks out of the attic.
Very well written and entertaining adventure tale that I think most people will relate to.

Well done using the prompt and for daily flash fiction. I know it is hard to complete a story in a day. This one is awesome.

Jeff, thank you for sharing this entertaining work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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528
528
Review of Is it only me?  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Moyo Kamlin, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"Is it only me?" Open in new Window. by Moto kamlin

Clarity: A good title for this work.

Writing style: Personal opinions.

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written piece asking questions that most all of us ask at a young age. Everyone is wired differently, throughout life we often learn that what we thought were our shortcomings or actually actually some of our strong points. Different is good nobody wants to be normal.
Surrounded with a shroud of mystery is extremely strong nobody wants to be an open book. Listening and taking it all in is like an art form. Especially these days you don't find many listeners everyone is too busy talking about themselves. You speak with more authority and intelligence by listening weighing out the information so that your response is more meaningful in an intelligent way.

You often learn that those people you were worried about what they think of you we're actually more worried about what you think of them.

Your commitment to self improvement and seeking guidance is a strong trait that a lot of people never master.

This is a very strong piece of writing that shows you have a gift for expressing your thoughts on paper. Well done.

Moto kamlin, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
529
529
Review of Today's Child  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)

Hi Kenzie I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Today's Child" Open in new Window.
by Kenzie

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: Beautifully written poem. Well worded short stanzas that make their point well. I like the large colored fonts, this is easy to read plus it make this poem stand out.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: This cyber age is full of mystery especially for some of us dinosaurs. We always tried to avoid chat rooms and social media groups, then suddenly we're told we're behind if we are not a member of this and that and got XXXX number of followers.

Well obviously this is a very strong poem, it has caused the philosopher to show up. Well done.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: There are no problems with the mechanics that this reader sees.

Kenzie, thank you for sharing this inspirational poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
530
530
Review of The Journey  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)

Hi MJones, I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "The Journey" Open in new Window.
by MJones

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A strong free verse poem, in a few words you have said a lot. Indeed it is about the journey not the destination.

I really like express it in 8, when I first heard of it I thought that was not enough lines now it seems to be just about right.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: This Reader see's the portrait of a soul on life's pathway.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics:No problems that I see.

MJones, thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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531
531
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Jackiesmuse, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"Rachel Howard Live WC 296" Open in new Window. by Jackiesmuse

Clarity:The title works well for this apocalyptic drama.

Writing style:Modern fantasy drama.

My favorite line:---I snorted. I’m admitting live, on the air, that I snort when I’m scared---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A good idea for this story. I like it.

A well written strong storyline in a few words, you got your point across good.

A very realistic story. I can picture this happening on several of the news show's. Well written with strong characters that are very realistic.I Feel that most people will be able to relate to this story.

Nicely structured this makes it easy for the reader.

I like the way you added humor to this otherwise serious story, well done.


Jackiesmuse, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
532
532
Review of Hide and go seek  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Ritzy Vampi, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"Hide and go seek" Open in new Window. by Ritzy Vampi

Clarity: Good title for this tale.

Writing style:Adventure drama.

My favorite line:--- She explained how to bark a squirrel off a tree limb with only a slingshot and then confessed she hadn’t been able to kill more than one---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written story with a good structure. This makes it easy for the reader while inviting for a browser.

Good characters with good dialog. A good narrative.

Great descriptions that help the reader visualize the setting.

A sudden ending that leaves the reader wanting to know more.

Ritzy Vampi, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:Consider working on the ending to give the reader closure or a hint to another chapter.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
533
533
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi Max Griffin, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"A Twist in Time--Chapter 1" Open in new Window. by Max Griffin

Clarity:Great title for this time travel tale.

Writing style:Sci-fi drama.

My favorite line:--- The more important question is when we are.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written sci-fi mystery adventure. This story is written with a very realistic tone that it carries through out.

Good characters with realistic dialog. Great descriptions that take the reader into the story right beside Justin.

A good job with the action, this keeps the reader toward the edge of his seat.

The story holds a realistic flow. A good ending that leaves the reader wanting to turn the page.

Max, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
534
534
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Sumojo, I came across this story while random reviewing.


My impressions of:"Be careful what you wish for. " Open in new Window. by Sumjo

Clarity:A good title for this story.

Writing style: Pet relationship drama.

My favorite line:---“But...” He tried to explain how much it would mean to him, but Fiona shook her head.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written biographical style story about Harry finally getting a dog.

A good narrative with a strong likable character. This helps draw the reader into the story.

Good descriptions that take the reader into the story.

A good ending that highlights the title.

Sumojo, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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535
535
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Sinbad, I came across this story while reviewing for the superpowers May raid.
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My impressions of:"Transformation of Divine Dragon" Open in new Window. by Sinbad

Clarity:A good title that describes the content of the story well.

Writing style: Mythological folktale drama.

My favorite line:---I shall transcend the estate of ordinary fish and achieve a place among the order of sacred dragons.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written entertaining tale. Nicely structured story that is easy for the reader. A good story-line.



Sinbad, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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536
536
Review of First drum set  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi again Kare Enga, I came across this story while reviewing for the superpower May raid.
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My impressions of:"First drum set" Open in new Window. by Kare Enga in Montana

Clarity:Nice title for this poem.

Writing style:Children poetry.

My favorite line:

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written and very descriptive poem.
The way you structured this poem brings out the point. Well done.

Kare Enga in Montana, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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537
537
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi dogpack:saving4 premium:DWG, I came across this story while reviewing for the superpower May raid.
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My impressions of:"We three: God, Bella, and Me" Open in new Window. by dogpack:saving4 premium:DWG

Clarity:A good title for this poem.

Writing style: Pet spiritual poetry.


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A random rhyming pattern aids to this poem's deep flow. They say Dogs are man's best friend, suppose that is pretty much true. I know my dog sure acts like my best friend.

A well worded poem with a nice structure.

dogpack:saving4 premium:DWG, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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538
538
Review of Haunting Memories  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi again Dave, I came across this story while reviewing for the superpower May raid.
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My impressions of:"Haunting Memories" Open in new Window. by Dave

Clarity:A good title for this work.

Writing style: Family relationship poetry

My favorite line:--- After he passed, your faith surpassed
the darkness trying to invade
your spirit world, as life unfurled
beyond the ever-growing shade
in loving memories. ---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: tThis is a strong deep poem, the emotions can be felt. Good random rhyming pattern adds to the unique flow.

A portrait of one in mourning is painted for this reader



Dave, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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539
539
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Mary Ann, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Come With Me Beneath The Sea." Open in new Window. by Mary Ann MCPhedran

Clarity: A good title for this poem.

Writing style: Nature poetry

My favorite line:--- No fishing hook can reel them in.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A lovely poem with a unique rhyming pattern that gives this poem a nice flow. A land of beauty beneath the sea, a nice image.

Mary Ann MCPhedran, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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540
540
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi Big Bad Wolf is Hopping, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Planet Animalus Info and Book Sums" Open in new Window. by Big Bad Wolf is Hopping

Clarity: Interesting title.

Writing style:Animal descriptions.


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A nice introduction piece to describe the animals in your book.

-No one wants the wild beast after them.- This seems like very good advice.

Big Bad Wolf is Hopping, thank you for sharing this unique work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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541
541
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Nixie, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Dr. Zhivago and the Cheesecake" Open in new Window. by Nixie

Clarity: A great title for this entertaining tale.

Writing style:Family childrens drama.

My favorite line:--- A fourteen-year-old trying to be invisible in the chaos of Dad's fortieth birthday celebration preparations.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written story with strong characters. A good job with the dialog. A good easy to read structure.

Nixie, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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542
542
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Maryann, I came across this story while reviewing for the superpower May raid.
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My impressions of:"The Majestic Animals" Open in new Window. by Maryann

Clarity:A great title for this entertaining poem.

Writing style:Animal poetry.


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A beautifully written and structured poem about animals. Nicely done.

Peacocks are indeed beautiful birds. My aunt used to raise them so I had several experiences with them. A word of advice do not grab one by the feet when it's in its roost, they are some big powerful birds.

Maryann, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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543
543
Review of Nature's Grace  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi again Dave, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Nature's Grace" Open in new Window. by Dave

Clarity:A good title for this delightful poem.

Writing style:Structured poetry.


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A nice rhyming pattern that gives this unique work it's refreshing flow.
Natures grace, no artist can encase. Well said this is so true wouldn't it be amazing to be able to write something as beautiful as nature's grace.

Dave, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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544
544
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi April Desiree, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Get Out of My Mind" Open in new Window. by April Desiree-I'm back!

Clarity: A good title for this poem.

Writing style:Poetry.

My favorite line:--- I occupy the battle cry of warrior women scorned
and forge in fire
your funeral pyre,
our union seldom mourned---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written poem with a nice rhyming pattern that that gives a good flow to this poem.

A nicely structured poem. I like the big font, it makes it easier on my weak eyes.

April Desiree, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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545
545
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi HollyMerry, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Rosie westie at the park" Open in new Window. by HollyMerry

Clarity:A good title for this poem.

Writing style:Nature pet poetry.

My favorite line:--- Her coal-black eyes glisten for an adventure---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:Well written poem with a nice structure. This makes it easier for the reader.

A delightful easy going relaxing flow to this poem.




HollyMerry, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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546
546
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Nanapockets, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"MY MOM IS THE WORST COOK IN THE WORLD!" Open in new Window. by Nanapockets

Clarity: A great title that describes the contents of the story well.

Writing style: Family children's drama.

My favorite line:---Mom has a habit of trying to fool us into eating whatever it is she cooks.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written entertaining story. Nice structure for this story. This makes it easier for the reader.

I can't help but to feel like you're exaggerating a bit however I have heard of people that could burn water, so I suppose I believe it.

Nanapockets, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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547
547
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Dave, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"The Puppy's Portrait" Open in new Window. by Dave

Clarity:A good title for this pet poem.

Writing style: Pet poetry.


My favorite lines: ---When artist paints the doggy's face
and pigments color empty space,
arranged in glowing graphic style
to show her Mona Lisa smile,
emotions flow at rapid pace.---



My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A great rhyming pattern that contributes to the unique flow of this lovely poem.

Well done, this poem is very entertaining.

Dave, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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548
548
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Mary Ann MCPhedran, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"Sylvester Is A Smart Cat" Open in new Window. by Mary Ann MCPhedran

Clarity:A great title for this poem.

Writing style:Pet poetry.

My favorite line:--- Jumps on to the sink
'I need a drink.'---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A lovely poem. Short, sweet and to the point, with a few words you have said a lot about Sylvester the black cat.

Mary Ann MCPhedran, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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549
549
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi intuey, I came across this story while random reviewing.
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My impressions of:"A Fisherman's Tale" Open in new Window. by intuey

Clarity:A good title for this work.

Writing style:Animal, environment poetry.

My favorite line:--- Jonah would know this intense feeling.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: --We watched the stars starting to wake up from their sleep.-- I love that line.

A well written poem that is strongly worded which gives this work its realistic flow.



Intuey, thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: None

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
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Review of Bobby [162]  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Kare Enga, I came across this story while random reviewing.

My impressions of:"Bobby [162]" Open in new Window. by Kare Enga in Montana

Clarity:Seems like an appropriate title for this tale.

Writing style:Friendship drama.

My favorite line:---Boys will be boys... if they only knew.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A great start for this story. I love the part about the treehouse. Eleven is a good age, growing from a child to a young adult.

A well told story, the emotion scream's out to the reader. This 385 word story is two or four thousand words worth, factoring in the emotion, the mystery. This draws the reader deep into the work, leaving him wanting to know more, wanting to turn the page.

Nicely structured making it easy for the reader while inviting to a potential reader.

A great use of the prompt words.
Kudos.



Kare Enga, thank you for sharing this wonderful work, it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:No suggestions.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group Open in new Window. (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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