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Review Requests: OFF
3,537 Public Reviews Given
4,150 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I tend to review using a format that I can comment on plot, characters, setting, atmosphere and dialogue. I also try to point out typos/errors and that sort of thing. This style may change depending on the item!
I'm good at...
I'm better with fiction than anything else. I might be able to have a go at poetry but please don't expect too much!
Favorite Genres
Horror, dark, suspense, thriller, mystery. However, I'm open minded and will read most genres.
Favorite Item Types
Statics - fiction.
Public Reviews
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851
Review of The One  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

Well done on a really nice piece. I think I was drawn into the piece because it was described as written from a male point of view and this really intrigued me. Hope you don't mind me asking but why did you write this from a male point of view and how do you see it as being different from a female point of view? Just a thought!

The poem works well, each stanza working together with the rhymes fitting nicely without force. It seems to have been a piece that has easily flowed from your mind.

The subject is really sweet and depicts the stages of a relationship; I can see all this as it's happening and recognise the stages and the feelings that go with it too *Smile*

*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*I would just say make sure to be consistent with your punctuation, in some you have full punctuation and others there is some missing.




Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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852
Review of Broken Bird  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! I found you on the Power Shop Review Board! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

Well done on a really powerful piece. I think from the minute I began to read I was drawn into this story which is brilliant!

The description you use throughout is great, it really captured my attention and set the scene. I could imagine the pond, surrounded by trees, the wind fierce, the girl, anxious. You use good description when it is necessary but also are able to slow down the description when action takes precedence which is good too.

You've created a really good and strong character in this young woman, this Raven. I really felt for her as I read and felt myself really wishing she was able to get through the trauma she was suffering. To me, she seemed like a star in the shadows, something different and someone who was not willing to back down. I really liked her as a character (and hated the man who abused her).

When I first opened this piece, my thoughts were around forced marriage and honour based violence. I'm not sure if this is because she was a young girl and I was seeing an older man, who was clearly in control of the situation. I don't think this is a bad thing because although it wasn't about that issue, it was about the girl being rejected because she had different values.

*NoteR*A few suggestions I had:


         *BulletG*While I really enjoyed this piece and understood that the girl was being looked down upon and ostrasized for having different ideals and values to her community, I found myself wondering what she had done so differently. I found myself wanting to know more about the community, about what actions she made to bring shame down upon herself. It was obviously a very strict culture with tight belief structures that she was rejecting, but I wanted to know more about that. Just a thought!

         *BulletB*I would suggest where you have the line break, you could perhaps use three emoticons and centre them on the page? It's just a thought but I think it might make the piece look a little neater.




Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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853
Review of Ode to Coffee  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I saw this and really wanted to read it because I too, love coffee! I find that I can't function without my early morning caffeine hit, much as the person in this piece can't either!

I think you've written this well, showing the reader the protagonist's love and need for coffee through your vivid description of both the coffee and its brewing but also of the man and his impatience on waiting for it.

I particularly liked how you described it as 'divine essense' ! I have to agree with you there!


*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*Making my thoughts soaring for its delight - this line didn't sit quite comfortably with me and I suspect that 'soaring' should be 'soar' but I'm not 100% so ignore me if you think I'm wrong!




Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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854
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

Well done on this short little piece. It tells of a man who was sent to do a job but failed because someone got there before him. However, he made up for that and managed to stop the terrorists from doing anymore damage!

*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*he reflected on the job he undertook that has him in constant pursuit of the cops. - here the word 'has' brings the story into the present when you have written it in past tense. I would suggest changing it for 'had'

         *BulletB*I would maybe also say that after he rammed the van with his car, I didn't think it was clear that he died. I thought he was just in pain, so maybe this could use a little extra detail.


Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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by Maryann- summer travel


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855
855
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I'm quite interested in trying to get published so this piece really made me sit up and want to read! I think you've done well to clarify a lot of the jargon used within publishing,particularly around the roles and what that can mean, so well done!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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by Maryann- summer travel


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856
856
Review of Laura  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

She is one evil little girl! Hope I don't come across someone like her. I think you've written this piece well and even though it's short, you've managed to develop Jimmy well as a character giving the reader a brief insight into his background (and therefore his motivations) as well as his personality.

The story moves at a good pace and although I knew something of the sort was going to occur, I didn't know exactly so that was a good surprising element. You build the suspense well, even up to and past the point where the doors open and everyone turns to face Jimmy.

*NoteR*A few suggestions I had:


         *BulletG* “Right” Jimmy replied sarcastically. - I think you need a comma after the word 'right' here

         *BulletB*Those that were supposed to help him only ignored his plight or worse. - I may be wrong but I feel like there should be a comma after the word 'plight'



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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857
Review of The Silent Night  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

This was a really good piece. I wasn't sure what to think when I opened this but it appealed to me and I kept an open mind, and I'm glad I did. You depict the different emotions throughout this piece really well, from the teenage jubilation of the forbidden alcohol at a party to the fear and hysteria felt towards the end of the shark attack.

I particularly like the line:

'Although we held no real grudges, we cursed our parents, our teachers, school, and life itself, getting louder and more courageous with every word.'

I think it really captures how young people are/can be, particularly that there are 'no real grudges' but they do it anyway!

*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*The only suggestion I had was for you to take another look at the layout of the piece, in a few places there are line breaks when there needn't be/


Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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by Maryann- summer travel


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858
858
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! I'm returning a review you did for me! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

For your first piece of fiction you've done really well! I think you use description really well to build both the scene and the suspense to keep the reader wanting more. The description really helped me see the world the Professor was walking in, how dark and gloomy and rainy it was. It really painted a picture.

We meet the Professor who seems like a lonely but content man, but that is all we learn because he is then killed! I found this to be a really good opening to something bigger, you have a great hook here and left me wanting more!

*NoteR*A few suggestions I had:


         *BulletG*He was lost in his thoughts as suddenly - this is fine as it is but I'm only pointing it out because I think I'd feel more comfortable with it if you had the word 'when' instead of 'as'. But I don't think it's a necessary change just something I thought I'd note!

         *BulletB*The adrenaline in his blood had done all what it could - I would say here, delete the word 'what'. It's not needed.

         *BulletR*The killed pulled the knife out and stabbed him again. - I think this should be 'killer'



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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by Maryann- summer travel


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859
Review of In the Darkness  
for entry "Welcome Home
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

You're probably still in the middle of working on this but when I saw it in the hub in the recently added books section I was really drawn to it and wanted to read it!

So far so good. You've begun setting the scene and the background for the story and I can already feel the suspense building; she's really apprehensive and you've brought that across brilliantly. I think her character is developing well and I can't wait to see more of her!


*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*Then was came the homes, - this was the very last line I read. I think the word 'was' may be extra but I can also see you've stopped mid sentence so you're probably not finished there!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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860
860
Review of Department Store  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

This story actually really creeped me out! I think you've written it really well, explaining your side of the story from the child's point of view, exactly as you saw it. I love that world that you gave us a glimpse into *Smile*

You described both man and boy really well. Towards the end I got really creeped out by the man, the one posing as somebody to be trusted who obviously couldn't be. Well done on being able to write so well as to create such a shivery feeling in your reader. And thank you for sharing this with us



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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861
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I don't often read non-fiction pieces, but this really caught my eye. I've been struggling with my hair being in a bad condition for months now and I'm hoping I'll get some good advice from your article!

I'm really glad I did decide to check out this piece. I had absolutely no idea that such harmful substances were present in shampoos (and probably indeed many other products we use). I'm really shocked and while I understand it's for us to do our homework, the thought has never crossed my mind until now. I've always used store-bought shampoo and it's not something I've ever considered.

But I think that now, it will be. Perhaps the root cause of my hair being so damaged is the products being put onto it. I think that I will look into making my own.....

Thanks for such an informative piece!!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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862
862
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

Hey! I really love anything zombie so had to come by and check this out. Plus it seems like a fun concept and I wanted to see what you came up with *Smile* So here I am!

This was a fun little piece which looked on the lighter side of being a zombie, with the zombie actually being the doctor in this case! The plot moves at a good pace and we see Mary being cured from her addiction and an odd relationship being formed between doctor and patient, making them both happy *Smile*

*NoteR*A few suggestions I had:


         *BulletG*He knocked on the door urgently, which Buzz open - this should be 'opened'

         *BulletB*Mary, realizing all her wrong ways, begins to cry and spends the next hour being counseled - something I've noticed is that you switch between past and present tense in this piece. I tend to find it's better to stick to one because it helps the reader and the flow of the story. If I was going to write this in the past tense I would write:

Mary realised all of her wrong ways and began to cry, spending the next hour being counselled...

or if I was going to write it in present tense I would write:

Mary, realising all her wrong way, begins to cry and spends the next hour being counselled...

Hope this makes sense?!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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863
863
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

For me, the title really drew me into this piece; I wanted to know about the stone cottage and what made it worth writing about *Smile*

I think this is the start of something really nice. You have written about two people, not necessarily lonely people, who have met via the internet and connected instantly with a bond that is more than that of a relationship built on whim. You've introduced the two characters well, giving the reader insight into their previous lives but also their needs and desires of the present. They both seem like very likeable characters and I can only wonder where their relationship will go. I found myself wanting to know what happens next? What happens within the walls of the stone cottage?


*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*that he was, indeed, the one She’d been waiting for - I think this should maybe be a small 's' ?


I think this is the start to something good, you introduce the characters and the story well and leave the reader wanting more *Smile*


Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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864
864
Review of Haunted  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

The title and description of this piece really intrigued me; I read it as a person who is haunted rather than a place. Anyway! So I decided to read it, so here I am.

Okay, so now I've read this piece and it was completely not what I expected! But that's not a bad thing. I think this piece has been really well written and thought out. You've portrayed your emotions on the subject of relationships, and some in particular, that affect you in such a way. I feel like you've written put a lot of yourself into this piece and I think that must have been hard, so well done.

I hope you're okay *Smile*





Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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865
865
Review of Memory  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I think this is the start of something good. The title and description point the way to the jist of the story without reading to much, but also encouraging the reader to find out.

The plot moves at a good pace, we are met wth Nathyrra who is a girl who does not know herself, plagued by a disembodied voice who seems to know everything about her. It made me want to know who the voice was, how he knew her. And now I know I want to find out what happens next!

I think this was a good introduction to the story, the character was developed as well as possible considering the circumstances and we are left wanting to know what is going to happen, well done!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

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Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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866
866
Review of Rush Hour  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

This was a really emotional and heart felt piece. Although the title and description gave a big clue, I wasn't sure what to expect and so I opened this piece with an open mind.

I really enjoyed reading it. I found that the plot moved at a good pace, telling the story of a woman who was experiencing a stressful and life altering time and the decisions that came with it. I think you've captured the balance between present and past really well and allow the reader to see her father as Kate grew up and understand the great man that he was.

I think seeing the father and girl on the subway was a really nice touch and I often find that it's moments like those, when allowed time for reflection, that things become more clear.



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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867
867
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I found this to be a really thoughtful piece. You've considered the nature of journal keeping, what might be written amongst its pages, thought of with utmost importance at the time, but lying forgotten after many years have gone. I think you've been able to reflect nicely here about the purpose of a journal and the importance it can play in an individual's life at certain points.

I think this piece fits well with me, because I have old journals hidden in my room, where I know there are scores of thoughts and memories and goals I want to achieve, that have simply been forgotten over time, and it makes me wonder, where they ever that important to begin with?

The poem flows well and I found that because you use free form it allowed you to express your emotions on the subject with clarity given time. You have used a lot of good imagery within this too and I can picture it well within my head as I read, well done *Smile*




Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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868
868
Review of The Hidden Side  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I was attracted to this piece because I used to work in a cinema for several years and I aways thought there was more to it than there seemed!

This was a really good, short piece using great and vivid description to alert the reader to what something may truly be like after hours. I could feel the atmosphere as you described it and it definately left me feeling chilled!

*NoteR*A thought I had:


         *BulletG*I think the only thought I had was around the last paragraph, where it seems to change in style and from a qute passive description involved the reader using the word 'you'. I was just wondering if this was purposely done?



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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869
869
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

This piece really spoke to me. I feel like you've really put your heart into this and described, both for yourself and the reader, how you felt at the horrors you have faced in your life. And while you have made me picture the terrible things you must have seen and felt during the time you have served, you have helped me to understand the different and the utter horror you felt upon seeing someone you love so much, not themselves anymore. I feel like you've helped me understand this through your logical explanation and description; I really felt your emotion in this piece.

I can't say I know how you feel, I don't suppose that I can, however, you have my deepest sympathy.

Take care *Smile*



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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870
870
Review of Waiting for a Son  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

You have written a really nice piece here. It flows well from beginning to end, telling the story of a man who rescued and adopted a young boy who was rather like himself when he fought for the military.

I like the plot of this piece, it's really heartwarming and though Jason didn't want anything to do with the boy at first, he ended up glad he did when he ended up protecting and loving one of his own.

*NoteR*A few suggestions I had:


         *BulletG*or those who'd been honorable discharged, - this should be 'honourably'

         *BulletB*Something else I was thinking about is that I wasn't sure if everybody including the humans were aware of other species i.e. werewolves. Maybe you can make this a little clearer. Also when Jason is tied up to the pole after going to rescue the boy, I assumed he was in his human form when in fact, he was in his wolf form. Perhaps you can make it a little clearer which form he's in?



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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871
871
Review of Story Maker  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

You open this story well, encouraging the reader to find out about the new bookstore, just like Gemma wants to. Intrigue is already there because nobody else seems to have noticed the store but her, and we are left wondering why.

You develop her character well throughout this piece, introducing both appearance as well as personality and allowing the reader to understand her motives and her mind.

Suspense is built really well throughout this piece through your use of vivid description, keeping the reader interested and intrigued. I felt my eyes roving and almost speed reading as I tried to find out what was going to happen!

I don't have any suggestions to make for you for this piece.


Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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872
872
Review of "Gasp!"  
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! This is your third review as part of the Elven Tea Garden Jailathon! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

Well done on another good piece! You've written this well, telling the reader about your amazing experiences as an animal control officer and what you had to face on a daily basis (with a smile on your face!)

The title and description of the piece are fitting and it's what made me initially want to read, to find out what was happening. Well done!


*NoteR*A suggestion I had:


         *BulletG*In 1986, alligations - should this be 'alligators' ?





Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


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873
873
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! This is your second review as part of the Elven Tea Garden Jailaton! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

This is a really funny short story! Did this really happen to you? I can only imagine how awful that must have been. You write this piece well, describing it so that the reader is able to see how awful it must have been for you.

I'm really glad you were rescued and only wish it was in a much shorter time!



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

874
874
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! This is the second review as part of the Elven Tea Garden Jailathon! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I really love reading these things because I love to hear the story behind everyone's username. And as much as it is depressing, as you say, it's true and I'm glad you chose to write this piece. I feel like I gained a lot of knowledge from this, I didn't know about the percentage of population without access to clean water or what the Guinea Worm Disease was (I had never heard of this in fact!)

And after reading this I have to say I think you picked your name from a great cause *Smile*



Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

875
875
Review by blue jellybaby
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey!

This is a Power Review! This is the second review as part of the Elven Tea Garden Jailathon! *Smile*

Please remember that these are just my thoughts and somebody else might see it differently!


*NoteR*What I liked:

I couldn't resist reading the second part of this story! I really wanted to know what was happening *Smile*

I'd really like to see more of this! Do you plan on writing any more? It was really good to be able to follow the story of Kevin and Lance. I can't get over how insanely strong Lance is!! And as much as he is strong he's modest about it which makes him a really adorable boy and character *Smile* I wonder how the rest of his family views him? Or haven't they noticed?

I get the sense that Kevin's a little bit jealous of Lance's strength, particularly because he's quite skinny, but it's still his kid brother and he loves him so he never lets it show.

Well done on another good write!!




Hope this helped!


But well done on a good write!!*Pencil*

Reviewed on behalf of the WDC Power Reviewers Group:

WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  [E]
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
by Maryann- summer travel


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

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