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Review of Wake Up!  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Earth* *Heart* Happy Earth Day Ken! *Sun**Tree*


*Mushroomb* Thanks for entering this lively expression into the Earth Day challenge! You really hit the nail on the head in your last line with potency indeed! *Laugh* and not *Laugh* The issue is certainly debated a lot, even after all this time and study. It may not be responsible for the whole of earth changes but to deny it is a big part seems unconscious. *Sad*

*Earth* I like the underlying feeling in the work as you reveal how the news effects you and how the depression moves to a more potent stance at the end. A Call to act! There really is a lot of talk. Your exhortation in verse 4, after revealing the evidence in other verses is dramatic and I felt the impact.

*Wind* The Quatrain form is composed well with wonderful rhyme and steady flow that was a pleasure to read aloud. You did not indicate if you which syllable count you were using but I notice inconsistency in this area. You begin with an 8 count in verse 1 and shorter counts in the middle as if to speed the pace---weather, panic, and then back to an 8 count in the last two verses (but for the emphatic last line.) Perhaps within verses consistency would be better. *Wink* A quick read will show you and I know you already know this so I figure there is a poetic rationale. *Smile* It doesn't spoil the read or its impact! I was just surprised.

*Earth* The voice was authentic and the intent meaningful. The chosen images were illustrative and supported the point of view and amazement that one can deny the truth. Bringing in the concern for "kid's birthright" is a moving mortivator! *Thumbsup*

*Star* Thanks for Tweeting UP for Mother Earth!
Light on the path as you write on!


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702
702
Review of Acts of Green  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Earth* Happy Earth Day Neva! *Heart*


*Earth*Wow! I like the original title and its use in your acrostic poem. The tag line has a interesting fact too. How cool. I agree it will take many more acts of green to restore and protect the planet and it is good to know it is happening.

*Tree*Your acrostic was well composed and a pleasure to read with it tightly woven lines and details on the subject. I like where you even had rhyming bits--that is hard to have a scheme when verses are based on different length lines. That the short verse had no rhyme adds to its difference. I like the variety.

*Treepine*You share some well known facts about how we are not being good stewards in the first verses followed by a plea that we must do better for our future. The voice was authentic and inspiring in its rationale. The idea of "hallucination" in line 3 is brilliant.

I noticed a couple of glitches:
In verse 3: "pollutions reduction" needs to be "pollution's" to show possession.
I thought the last line could be tightened up for better flow.
eg. Now can affect the next generation" or "can affect the lives of the next generation".

*Earth*The two questions, not really a part of the acrostic are both thought provoking and serve as bookends to the poem, inspiring us to ponder. Thanks for sharing this vivid vision in honour of the earth. *Star*

*Sun* Light on the path as you write on!

eyestar


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703
Review of the last egg  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Earth* *Heart* Happy Earth Day RHyssa! *Sun**Tree*


*Earth* I was enchanted by the title which was evocative of sadness somehow. It made me curious as being the "last" could have different meanings.

*Eggo* I enjoyed reading this very descriptive expression where each verse reveals the spring season and elements of its growth. Each verse is clear and follow a 5-7-5 pattern except for the last couplet, which I take is part of the Haiku sonnet form. I do not know much about that form. *Wink* The last verse sums up a sadness and tieing the "shadow" of winter to the "unborn" . Brilliant.

*Eggb* The poem is vivid with lots of images. I thought in Haiku each verse was to focus on one specific and vivid image and a contrasting one--two at the most and provide an Aha moment. The first verse centers on spring (though you give 3 nouns) and contrast with the frost so it does have a contrast image. Also, I think adverbs are not often in haiku. eg."secretly"--what would that look like in vivid language. In the third verse "all radiates life" is very general and does not give me a specific image to focus on.*Wink*

*Eggg*I can see why the punctuation is needed in how you write this, though again haiku uses little of it usually. I have read that in English we actually use more words that the japanese original in order to get the syllables right. I suppose that is why it is controversial now in how to create one. *Laugh*

*Earth* That bit of my learning said, I was drawn into your vision and could imagine the "hatchlings" and the wee nest with eggs. I felt sad for the last one. Good job!

The second verse is a favourite with its detailed picture--delightful!

*Eggr*In researching Haiku sonnet I see it is experimental and I think you have linked each verse adequately. The atmosphere created mimics the emotion of a sonnet and the 3 line descriptives fit the form. The overall feel and effect of your vision is solid and I could enter into the vision with ease. I appreciate the effort it took to create this with coherence. I have enough problem with regular sonnets! *Facepalm* Well done.*Starstruck*

*Earth*Thanks for sharing your spring vision and craft in this cool form! Keep on haikuing! Light on the path as you write on!

eyestar

April 22nd is Earth Day!


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704
Review of Rainy Day  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Earth* *Heart* Happy Earth Day Mrs. B.Ray! *Sun**Tree*


Congrats on your pretty ribbon on a Rainy Day!

*Rain* Your poem was fun to read and I like you describe the weather in each verse and then give your reflection on it. It adds a personal touch. I had to laugh at the question about snow as I can so relate to it. We have had a strange winter too! *Laugh* You showed the confusion well.
I also grinned at the good thing about cloudy weather--the rooster! Too funny!! I like the attitude of always a silver lining. *Thumbsup*

*Rain*The last two verse change in tone as if the blues are taking over after trying to find the happy in a rainy day. You almost give in but then you end with the wish, which is hopeful and leave us to dream of new adventure. Quite a journey. *Wink*

*Rain*I did not notice a set pattern to the verse rhythm and the rhyme scheme was consistent and assisted the flow and poetic nature. Instances of assonance as in "thunder rumbles" and the long "i" sounds in places like: lightning, strikes, cry, sky, mine etc. add flow and interest to the soundscape as I read aloud.

*Rain*The images reflect the elements of weather and the verbs are active. I wondered about the "quite hard" description and thought it could be more vibrant. Maybe find a more interesting adjective. *Wink*

*Star* I enjoyed the vision as I was drawn into your feeling about the weather and could imagine the thunder and building storm. I like the personification of the lightning and it can do what it wants. *Laugh* Thanks for sharing this evocative expression that made me smile even on a dreary day.

*Star*Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar
April 22nd is Earth Day!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
*Heart**Fairy*Hiya Megan rose! Yay ! I remembered this item and it fits with the Fan Fiction and Disney fare for our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. Raid! *Gingerbread*

*Tiara* This is a beautifully aesthetically pleasing forum and sets the vibe for princesses and fairy tale magic with its pink font and gorgeous pictures! Yo do lovely displays.
A question I had is why you do not center your images on the page? I always wonder. *Wink*

*Tiara* It is cool how this forum serves as a chat place and as a place to find prompts for writing in the category. A contest is right there for visitors to see and the prizes are cool. I won your Elsa badge doing 2 stories. Gorgeous!

*Tiara*The prompts are varied and interesting and I like that anyone can suggest a prompt in the forum to add to the list. *Thumbsup*

*Quill*In your last paragraph I did not get what you meant by "Use form" as you already directed us to the forum. *Wink* Am I missing something?

*Tiara*I see you have a link to a princess group item as well and I like how we can come to this forum for fun even if we do not belong to the group! *Smile* Greater exposure is possible as some folks do not really like to be affiliated. It is so welcoming!

*Tiara* *Star* Your voice is inviting and relaxed and your appreciation for the theme is evident. It is an enchanting place! *Wand* Thanks for creating yet another magical contribution.

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #2116758 Unavailable **

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Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Earth* *Heart* Happy Earth Day! *Sun**Tree*


*Grass* I so enjoyed reading this soft toned poem appreciative of the green grass of your home. It is so cool to create a painting of a specific picture in your mind.

*Grass*The first line held my attention and drew me in with its vivid image, comparison and assonance of "sprout" and "proud". I felt I was in for a treat and was not disappointed.
Each line bears one more aspect of the beloved grassy land to create a realistic and picturesque
atmosphere, with colour, sound and image. *Salute* The personification of the elements is well done and the "prancing of the children" mimics the joy that emanates from your vision. I love walking barefoot in grass! *Smile*

*Grass* According to your author's note on the form I see you have constructed it effectively. The rhymes are appealing and your use of poetic techniques like assonance and consonance really added to the sound and sensual appeal of the oral reading! Excellent.

*Grass* You are very thorough in your capturing the essence of this place as even at the end you give an idea of how the land is used. Using "money" to rhyme with earlier words is brilliant.
The last phrases gives us a clue as to the history of the fields, the longevity of use and joy of the land there. Beautiful sentiment. *Star*

*Grass* Thanks for sharing this masterfully crafted expression and sharing your back yard with such affection. *Heart*

*Sun* Light on the path as you write on!

eyestar

April 22nd is Earth Day!
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707
Review of Ode to Voldemort  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Heart**Fairy*Hiya irrefular_onion! I found your item while searching for Fan Fiction and Disney fare for our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. Raid! *Gingerbread*

*Wand* Oh this is brilliant and denigrating to Voldemort! Your descriptions are so vivid and the imagery is clear. The references to his looks are authentic and the comparisons effective. I had to laugh at your query about his lack of nose. You ask a good question. I never thought of that aspect. *Smile* Your comparatives to the Mona Lisa and his white face were wonderful. I could imagine it.

*Wand*Your suggestion and its effect in the end verses makes sense and I like the question in the last line of the second last verse. Nice wording. That he could look better than a house elf is comical too. And yet they would like to serve similar looking folk perhaps.

*Wand* It was fun to read your poem aloud, It has a rhyme scheme which ties in together and helps the flow. I did notice that the scheme change from ABAB to AABB The rhythm and structure of each verse is not regular for each one, which may add a dramatic effect. It is rather free style.

*Star*The entertainment value is potent and the author note at the end made me smile and add to the tone of the poet. Thanks for your imagination and sharing your creative expression. Well done!

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #2116765 Unavailable **



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708
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Hiya No more Rawr! I found your item while searching for Fan Fiction and Disney fare for our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. Raid! *Gingerbread*

*Delight* What a unique topic for a song parody! I thought the Christmas tune fit the gift that Weasely's recieved as it might have felt like Christmas. The idea that Ron went from underdog upward mimiced the Rudolph story too. Good choice.

*Delight* The flow of your verses parodied the music of the original pretty well. I think in the last verse it was a bit off kilter especially the third line but I could still sing it. *Smile* Punctuation is helpful to the read and flow.

*Laugh* I laughed at the last line! You really captured the trials Ron ahd with Draco by the references you use. Well done. I wondered about the word "beautiful" to describe wand and if there was a more magical or interesting adjective. *Wink*

Thanks for the entertainment and your creativity! *Star*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #2116765 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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709
Review of Harmony  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Earth*Happy Earth Day Huntersmoon!*Sun*


*Sun* Oh wow! This lovely tribute to earth showed up on the Read and Review today! I do enjoy reading your work so lucky you! *Laugh* The reference to First Nations is effective and I see it was for the group contest a while back. I am familiar with some of the cultures and beliefs so it was wonderful to revisit and be reminded of those nature spirits. I watch the deer each day and how they truly live within the flow of it all and dream...

*Rain* You have captured the essence of the cycle of sun and rain and how the people call for the rain. It is a vivid and I like the personal "we" voice as it relfects the belief that we are all in it together. The last verse reveals this even deeper--that we are one with all nature as well. *Turtle1*

*Earth*I noticed a glitch in verse one with "Its heated". Do you mean "it" or "It has"?

*Sun*The poem flowed fairly well as a quatrain with effective rhyme scheme. A few places I found where the syllable counts were a bit off. you don"t say if you are doing an 8-6 count but most seem to be an 8 count so I went with that. *Smile*
The last line in verse one is not 8 syllables like the others but it flows along quite well.
Line 3 verse 3 is a syllable longer than 8 but again the flow is unimpeded and I can see the need to emphasize "both" forms.
Line 3 verse 3 is off kilter when I read it aloud though. Maybe drop the word "the" which slows it down and gives it that extra syllable. *Wink*

*Earth* The image and description is clear with the use of thematic vocabulary that enhance the cultural essence as well. The symbolism is vivid in words like "turquoise", "heaven's tears", "trance" "dance" etc. I think the title speaks to the main idea you portray.

*Rain* This reminds me the "Pray Rain" story I can't recall the link now but the idea of a simple meditative prayer of a shaman to imagine the rain is already here. Thanks for sharing this message.

Light on the path as you write on!

eyestar
April 22nd is Earth Day!
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710
Review of Hidden Treasures  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with Earth Day Challengers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Earth* Happy Earth Day huntersmoon! *Earth*

*Earth* What a wonderful mix of mystery, fantasy and earth magics, truly a gift to Gaia!
You created a imaginative response to the prompt and used a form I may have heard of long ago but never wrote one! So this is interesting. Thanks for the author's note! *Wink*

*Tree* Wow! You really have a gift with words as this flows so potently as I read it aloud. The flow and soundscape were so pleasant and did justice to the Sapphic Ode. I was drawn into the revery with ease as I followed the dreamy voice. You created a vibrant atmosphere as you show us the invisible realm. *Starstruck*

*Flowerb*I was struck by the poetic conventions like consonance (especially the soothing s), Or l in Litany of fabled lore" etc, assonance as in "long thought lost...embossed" and the alliteration like "perdu presence"! Your rhyme was right on as well. The vocabulary was very interesting and effective in sound and building this world. Descriptions were vivid with words like "glimmering" and "covert"
and cool rhymes with "unexpected" and "embossed". *Thumbsup*

*Earth* I was really taken with the short end lines too. Each verse was coherent and added to the vision of Gaia's secrets. Your message that we are blind can be so true in this fast paced world where magic seems forgotten. *Sad* I love the vision in the clouds and the query word "reality". It gives me pause to ponder what is reality and is there more than meets the physical eye! I think so! *Fairy*

*Dolphin* Punctuation was purproseful and added to the reading. I did wonder at the period in the first line as the rest of your similar lines have semi colons. Is it for a stronger effect?

*Starstruck*There is a depth and nuance that strikes me the more I play in your world here. It activates my muse so your magic has worked! *Wand* Thanks for sharing your craft and opening the door to other visions.

*Sun*Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar
April 22nd is Earth Day!
711
711
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*Hiya Sonali! I found your item while searching for Fan Fiction and Disney fare for our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. Raid! *Gingerbread*

*Owl1* Wow! this is a stellar collection of quiz questions! *Shock* I am amazed. You know alot about Potter and I bet had many players stumped with your challenges. Some of these questions really test one's knowledge. It was a trip down memory lane reading the various sections. *Thumbsup*

I liked the way you set up varying themes to focus on specific things like character, dialogue, books, and random. I really liked the idea of fill in the blanks of iconic lines, and the true/false and the Make connections! Brilliant.*Star*

*Owl3* These would be awesome questions as part of a novel study for kids too! *Wink* Like the OWLS! *Bigsmile* I am glad to see answers in fine print as I can see where I totally was off the mark or had no knowledge--and now I have more knowledge. *Laugh* I will likely forget it again!

*Wand*The page is well organized with coloured titles for sections and easy find. The addition of page number references is wonderful help! And Makes it easy to judge with proof.

*Star* I felt the appreciation and passion you have for the Potter series as it must take time to gather and create these for events! I admire you! I imagine we will see more now we have some new JK Rowling books like the Fantastic beasts! *Heart*

*Starstruck*Thanks for sharing your vision and fun!

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #2116765 Unavailable **
712
712
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*Hiya Maryann aka Figment!*Laugh* I found your item while searching for Fan Fiction and Disney fare for our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. Raid! *Gingerbread*

*Fairy2* Oh my goodness! I did this fabulous poll awhile back and what?? never reviewed it? Impossible to imagine unless the result page has its own review spot! *Laugh* I must have been waiting for this raid!

*Wand* Thanks for creating this bit of fun to honour Harry's 10th birthday! Your intro had good snippets of information about the book and its titles and the influence it has had so far! I think you could add the number 10 to the anniversary line. *Wink* The question is direct and I love the little wizard glyph! So lively and entertaining.

*Fairy2* The choices of characters was good and I bet it was hard to choose from so many. Still you had Other as a category and stayed with the main names so it is a fair poll. *Star* The mini descriptions you do for each person is clear as you capture the essence and quality of them. It is easy to identify in case we forgot the names. *Wink*

*Wand* The results thus far are fascinating! Noone yet picked Harry. *Shock2* Even over Draco!

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #2116765 Unavailable **
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713
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC Cpgal! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Heart*Wow! Thanks you for sharing your experience so vulnerably. The topic is a difficult one to share I imagine and you did it well. The pain and anguish of abuse and the family secret and denial is vivid here. Your voice is authentic and the tone potent. *Thumbsup*

*Heart*Vivid heartfelt images like "dead heart", silent tears, the shame and yet the seeking for restored love, are effective and add drama. Addressing the tears is a wonderful bit of personification--if only tears could answer.

*Star* I honour you for sharing as this openness could inspire others who have been alone in this pain. *Heart* Keep writing. May you find healing and peace that is possible! *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar
For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
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714
Review of Dear Me  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Star* Hello Simply_Sandy Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as a judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*Wow! Your letter is well composed and encouraging to your self as you use a blend of stating targets and the rationale for them in a meaningful way.
I learned alot about your trials as you share with yourself in a vulnerable manner.
Your advice to yourself is profound and shows your awareness of what would bring balance and joy.*thumbusup*

*Fire* The writing is well organized as you discuss each target and it is effective to have goals for different aspects of you life to balance. I think each one builds and influences the other. *Wink* I like that you added details about what you could do--like to get out of the house. I did smile at your exaggeration with words "comatose" and "zombie" , could be motivating as long as no judgement is intended with it. My friend once told me "You can't open a flower with a hammer. " I can relate to self judgment. LOL

*Fire* I think appreciating yourself for all you have done is a fine way to lift your spirit to assist with fulfilling a greater vision. *Star* You do that here.

*Fire* I admire your journey thus far and can see you positively stepping forward.
I was recently at a Byron Katie conference and she says Love the one you are with: which is you! *Heart* Nobody can do it better. *Starstruck*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision for yourself. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*

"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC Cpgal1984! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*Wow! The title is evocative and tells a story on its own! I think you could add the genre DARK to this along with poetry and Bio. *Wink*

This expression has captured the essence of abuse, now a memory that left a heavy scar on the subconscious. Your image is clear and tone bleak, as though accepting the inevitablity of living the recalled wound. The last verse sounds like an echo and rather depressive as I think the poet is still suffering over time.

*Fairy2*The use of a free style poem suits the emotional content and the use of repeated sounds like "s" and "b" and the bit of alliteration in the 4th line adds an appealing soundscape when I read aloud. The punctuation was helpful for the read and understanding too.

*Fairy* Thanks for sharing a bit of yourself in this potent poem. Your vulnerability is honoured. *Star* Keep on sharing as the more light shines on the dark places of the world, the more healing can arise and joy can lead. *Heart* You are a contribution.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar
** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **

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Review of A Touch of Air  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC Austin! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight* The title intrigued me from the Random Read page! I was drawn into your comparisons in the first lines and enjoyed the imagery of "a feather that flies" as a comparative. *Thumbsup* The inviting tone of the next lines in the verse is romantic.

*Fairy*I was not sure what the 5th line means and am curious. Could you clarify?
I think a comma is missing after "talk" in the next line.

*Fairy*The last verse I find has repeated ideas though I can see you want to emphasize how different this person is.*Smile*

*Fairy* The bits of rhyme and assonance (vowel sounds repeated} really add to the flow and soundscape.

*Fairy* I noticed a few glitches for me: It is preferred habit to capitalize "i" to 'I" though there is a trend for effect. The word "flys" needs to be "flies".*Wink*

*Star* Thanks for sharing your romantic interlude. I appreciate the sentimental tone. *Smile*
Thanks too for sharing your expression. Keep on writing and take what makes sense to you and leave the rest! *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar
** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **
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Review of Dear Me 2017  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Star* Hello . Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as an extra judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*Your letter began with an intriguing question for you to consider! I like the positivity and open endedness of the query and how it invites expansion beyond the old mind meme. It is like appealing to the muse. Wonderful way to begin!

*Fire* I really like the way to straight talk to yourself and use meaningful quotes as inspiration. I know that would appeal to my self! *Wink* Your targets are specific and having them restated with clarity near the end in a list is emphatic and makes them easy to find when rereading this letter later! *Thumbsup*

*Fire*You add humour and give suggestions of how you might approach certain goals! It shows that you are perhaps already activated to go for it! *Heart* Intertwining principles to guide you, like not pleasing others, acknowledging your changes and being aware of where you still down yourself, is effective too.

*Smile* The writing was coherent and easy to follow. I did not notice any major glitches. I wonder about using the word "try" as I was recall Yoda's message of NO try, Do or Do not! *Laugh* It feels like a heavy word and really if you ever try to stand up... how do you do that? You either get up or you don't. I have also read that "try" can really mean that you won't--kind of like an excuse. Interesting new ideas I play with myself. "do you best to...review" etc. *Wink*

*Fire*Way to go with a firm and encouraging tone which speaks from the heart of who you be! What else is possible beyond the mind's preoccupations? Go for the dream!

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*

eyestar
For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.
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718
Review of Dear Me,  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Star* Hello Jenndoss Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as an extra judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*Wow! This letter is eloquent and I enjoyed the way your language flows as if the year's goals are happening as you speak! Quite a creative curve. *Smile* Your goals are specific and cover different aspects of life with an overall intent of balance.

*Fire* I can sense the tone of growing enthusiasm and self confidence that you are instilling in yourself as you vision the future. The voice is authentic as you shared so vulnerably. It was interesting getting to know some of of your story. I had to smile when you said now your teen is a teen and it is not such a shock as when your first one reached teenhood! *Laugh* Wisdom as you go along.

*Fire*Your viewpoint has idealism with a good dose of practical elements that makes the vision realistic and acheiveable. *Thumbsup*

*Fire*One glitch stood out to me: In the second last paragraph "fear of failing. Your perception.." the latter line hangs by itself. Perhaps the word "and" would connect the two phrases. *Confused* or to emphasize both points make the line direct as well. eg "You dump your perception.." or something. *Wink*

*Fire* Your letter to you is encouraging and positive and shows you know yourself and what appeals to you. The futuristic affirming style of expression has a meditation vibe--as if in a dream---that you can hold in place as you travel. *Starstruck*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*
eyestar
For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


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Review of More Fool You  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Star* Hello THANKFUL SONALI Magical Days! Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as a judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*Oh wow! This was a fabulous read! I loved your sense of humour in the way to talke to yourself. Such personality! Entertaining as you reveal what goals you would like to get moving this year. It was fun for me anyway!

*Fire* The writing is lively with an enthusiastic voice and I liked the way it flowed as ideas popped as you continue the conversation! The alliterative images were brilliant. eg:oodles of ostriches in the oasis" etc. Very motivating way to say move on! "bovine poop floats". *Laugh* *Laugh* You rock!!

*Fire* Your chosen targets are specific and purposeful. I like the way you unfold how it could be done with ease by showing it in the way to write it. The whole experience in the letter is so immediate. *Thumbsup*

*Fire*This letter made my night and I think yourself will be inspired and motivated by your sense of humour. A nice comparison to the more serious theme of goals. Yet, if there is not fun in them, it is harder to stick to them. *Wink*
Thanks for sharing yourself in this way. I like your style. Keep dreaming big. I think I would be inspired by your self talk. *Starstruck*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision in such a creative way. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*

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Pink Unicorn


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
720
720
Review of Dear Me - 2017  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Star* Hello 💙 Carly: poems & novel Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as a judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*Wow! This is a spectacular looking letter with a positive vibe and creative spirit! I really enjoyed the opening free poem which sums up your feeling about this new moment. The motivational song links at the end add to the inspiration of your letter. *Star*

*Fire*Your voice, tone and writing is appealing and was easy to follow. You have some really interesting objectives lined up and I like the way you have categories to show a well rounded picture of life goals.

*Fire* I was totally inspired and can see you moving forward in specific steps and how you want to challenge yourself. Vocabulary was well chosen and you kept up a positive yet practical voice. Good luck with the teaching --I know many are in the same place as yourself. *Smile*

*Fire* Your ending toast was brilliant and entertaining as well. I like how you celebrate yourself. Way to shine! *Starstruck*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*

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Pink Unicorn


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
721
721
Review of Dear Me  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Star* Hello Ms.Magi Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. I am happy as a judge to offer my comments! *Delight*


*Fire*I loved your humourous first line as I think the same thing. Everything is a success anyway! Your outlook is practical and shows a lot about your wise self. I am sorry to hear of your loss and wow, what a wake up call about best laid plans! Your response:"flexibility" is wonderful and has an easier vibe. *Thumbsup*

*Fire*Your goals are specific and feel manageable. As you go you can even break the largeness of them into doable bites and feel the success of each step! Might be fun to add those in as you go. I see happy check marks! *Checkr* I like how your intent also involves others and that what you chose makes sense for your lifestyle. I feel for you about the messy house. LOL I can relate.

*Fire* A few glitches caught my eye!
"cowards way out" needs to be "coward's way".
"the first one is almost ready" needs a period. Then begin "It just needs.."
It might be easier on the eyes to read if you put space between paragraphs. *Wink*

*Fire*I appreciated the wise lesson from your experience here. You teach as you create your steps! *Starstruck* Flexibility would help us not be so hard on our judgements of self too. *Heart*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision. Good luck with the jewellery and cleaning in the year to come. *Giftr*

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Pink Unicorn


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722
722
Review of Dear Me 2017  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Star* Hello Quick-Quill Author Icon. Thank you for entering the "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window. contest! I am happy as a judge, to review your piece with a few comments on your entry. *Delight*


*Fire*Wow! I really enjoyed how you specifically advised yourself on your writing objectives, using both ideas and references to past successes. The creative notions like "using objects" like the glass and some specific questions about storylines are valueable even for other readers to consider. *Thumbsup*

*Fire* You make a wonderful case for having a writing schedule just like a work or home schedule. Why not? *Cool* You know how your mind works.

*Fire* The tone is kind and purposeful and the intent seems practical in nature. It really suits the subject matter where you are giving power to where you want to go with your writing. I like how you praise your results to bring them to mind and lubricate the gears of your craft. Starting on a positive note and using words like "suggest" keeps it light. I would perhaps drop where you use the word "need" as it gives a sense of "must" and "neediness" instead of desire or invitation. *Smile*

A few picky glitches I noticed:
The third sentence hangs there. Maybe a comma or semi in the line before will help connect it. *Wink*
In second paragraph: "WDc" could be "WDC" , "a long ways.." I thought should be "way".
In paragraph 3, I wondered about dropping the comma after "Writing anything" as I think it continues into the the next part well.
In paragraph 5, "it's contents" needs to be "its".
In paragraph 11, do you need a comma after "Most of all"? and in the next paragraph comma in "Then, in January..." *Wink*

*Fairy*It feels like you really want to encourage you to increase writing focus and having specifics gives me the idea that you can indeed jump right in..and then leave time for the muse to play, once you are engaged. Magic happens.*Starstruck*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your inspiring vision. All the best in the year to come. *Giftr*

"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.
Pink Unicorn


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
723
723
Review of Odin's Eye  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hiya HuntersMoon! Thanks for your generosity in "Mad Hatter's Tea Party " Open in new Window.. Here is the review from a package you won. *Delight*


*Fairy3*I found this while exploring the Unicorn lairs in rainbow galaxies.*Starp* I enjoy tales of old and the ballad form suits this folklore theme of vikings.

*Fairy* This is brilliant and I could really enter into the story and see the gathering you mention in your introduction. The first two verses set apart to give a back story is helpful and clued me in to what whould follow. It wet me me up as one of the listeners. *Smile*
I was a bit confused what the refrain was at first. I assume it is the one beginning with "the tales are old.." but I think it could be more clear if you somehow separate it from the next verse as it took me awhile to figure out, given the non italic of the first part.

*Fairy2* The story-poem was well developed within the parameters of the form and was a delight to read aloud. The imagery was detailed and the mystery haunting! The idea of the continuing battle is cool. The title and name of the ship is alluring and shows the culture of the piece.

*Fairy* The chosen vocabulary was thematic and effective in creating a smooth flow and soundscape. The use of techniques like consonance, rhyme and assonance added to the coherence and cadence. I like the turn of phrase in "bright shone each shield and blade," and the sound and run on flow in "The Gods sent snow and ice and storm" as it mimics the idea of constant battering as the Norseman go on! *Thumbsup*

*Fairyr* The story is coherent though I was thrown a little by the second last verse at first.
They have the ship but them winter came and they watch still. I thought maybe that the early winter was a punishment of the gods and the verse would have come before they found the ship. Two verses repeat keeping look out.
But then it made sense that they would still keep a light for any shipmates. Just my vision I guess. It felt out of order. *Wink* It does fit either way.

*Star*I was entertained by this well crafted tribute to Viking folklore. You showed both the courage and certainty of the warriors and the sadness of the Odin's end, leaving us with a mystery of the crew's fate. It reflects an ancient way of thinking. Well done!

Thanks for sharing your vision! *Starstruck* Write on!

eyestar *Wink*
for "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. and Pink Unicorn Reviewers everywhere. *Starp*
Pink Unicorn


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
724
724
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hiya Huntersmoon!


*Fairy3*I found this while exploring the Unicorn lairs in rainbow galaxies.*Starp* I saw the plea from newsfeed far and so flew down to do more than *Star*! *Wink*

The sorry plight of the poet here is one familiar to a seer,
or doodle bug with a magic muse that imagination did enthuse.
Your weaving drew me into your vision without me making a decision.
Enthralled by vivid imagery and by the laughing unicorn plea
my muse was entertained, amused and by no glitched was confused.
The trickery of pink unicorns your humourous poem now informs.

Your quatrains are formed so well, complete with a rhyming spell.
So fun to read with room for pause, commas clear in every clause.
Referring to OZ gives us a clue as to the spell overtaking you.
Your descriptions show a rainbow world as in your mind the visions swirled.
The last verse evokes a dream, in the unicorn the laughs do gleam.

Fluffy Pink (and every other colour of giddy) Unicorns appreciate your tribute. Laughing all the way...and ah... too bad about the blank page you destroyed. No one will believe you now without evidence. *Laugh* *Starp*

Thanks for sharing your vision! *Starstruck* Write on!

eyestar *Wink*
for "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. and Pink Unicorn Reviewers everywhere. *Starp*
Pink Unicorn
725
725
Review of St. Patrick's Day  Open in new Window.
Review by eyestar~* Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Hi Chris! I am here with a third review as part of your "The 30DBC Mega-Raffle Extravaganza!" Open in new Window.! *Wink*

Oh, yay! St. Patrick's is coming up and I saw this cool poem so here I be! *Shamrock* Limericks are fun and it is such a great idea to use one to honour the Irish!

*Shamrock*Your formating is right on with appropriate syllable and rhyme scheme. It has a happy tone and brings a smile to think of the poet with his shamrock. I wondered if the shamrock was the "guy". LOL

*Shamrock* I am not sure if punctuation is required in limericks, yet I feel adding it would add to the drama.

Thanks for sharing this bit of fun! *Gold*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
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