Theme-
it is about freedom of the soul. shedding fear and hesitation one should go ahead with the future assured of safety and joy.
Shedding fear and doubt will open doors on a world hitherto unknown to us. A world where the vistas are full of beauty and grace.
"Let us leave the past behind.
Let the future be our own."
form and structure-
Written in a three-line stanzas of six, this poem has the rhyme scheme of ABA except in the last stanza where it adds one more line AB AB.
Imagery-
Images of the new world are on the horizon. The poem entices the poet's partner with the tone of courage and assurance that everything is going to be fine.
Love has a way of blinding people into believing falsities and flatter. And then it is too late to recognize and realize the real truth behind the mask of lies and deceptive appearances.
Title-
Tells us what will follow. Yet, we read on to track the wolf.
Form and structure-
Free style verse with five quatrains. Each of them shows a different stage of fall for a wrong person.
"Although you uttered many tender words..."
Rhythm is reflective of how things changed from being bright to dark.
Content-
Content is well dealt with. It has a novelty despite being repeated, for each story of deception has its own uniqueness.
"You painted a pretty picture
Then lured me in with gentleness"
Imagery-
this is finest aspect of the poem. Nature imagery to mirror the inner condition is well done.
"The sun's rays of gold turned black"
You brought the person alive in the poem with appropriate word choices.
It is one of those stories, which makes us smile as we draw to the end. Liz's character is well-defined and shown in her roles as a mother, as a hard-working employee and an ambitious hopeful to realize her dream.
There are many more angles to her personality. Her patience and forbearance too are shown effectively.
A nurse is what a person like Liz should be.
Dialog and setting are quite appropriate.
Lou loves her. Yet kept his silence understanding her future plans and the deep bond she has with her husband who served in the army.
The story unfurls itself in a natural way. Smooth flow of sentences keep us to reading it and expecting it to continue.
Very engaging.
Congratulations on being placed First in the contest.
I perfectly understand your taste for real life beauty in fiction as well. A classic, they say is forever. Books that describe and talk about life as found in real world with an addition of its beauty are, in my opinion become classics. The two books you mentioned are famous for two different reasons. While Huckleberry Finn is based on a real life character, Frankenstein is the first Gothic novel referred to as the first true science fiction story. I appreciate your point that there is a child in the respective books.
The fascination you have for reading is remarkable.
" As I enter into those hallowed halls I have become fully engrossed in this book, ... I see the setting as a real place, the characters are ... This world is no longer an escape, it is reality."
The above observation is hundred percent true.
Great assessment of reading(with complete pleasure).
Gift shops such as the one you mentioned, namely, Harlan Kirwan, Anna Kirwan, and Harley Kirwan Deadwood are not easy to find. I went through the experience of buying suitable gifts to friends and relatives. I wasn't happy with my finds.
In this advertisement, I find that I can get gifts to be given to various people including the smallest in the family.
The author has done a great job, showing the circumstances under which he went to the above shop and had a nice pick of the gift, he intended.
I came across this nice story in the Weekly Newsletter, "Short Stories: Seasons Change".
In this romantic story you had shown how the seasons change in human lives. Both the central characters are well defined. Elliot's part is important because we trace the life of the couple through his recap in the park. I notice the key role played by Rusty.
Anger's effect and speed are shown visually.
" His heart was racing, as anger coursed through him."
This story mirrors one of those sweet experiences of couples in love,i.e, fight and patching up.
I felt that a short dialog in the park could be nice.
I like the way the sentences and paragraphs connect. Smooth transformations are a draw.
this is quite a poem about the Halloween night. Instead of horrifying your verse makes the night delightful and worth watching.
The nightly song of wolves and the rising of ghostly presences are well depicted.
I just wonder who the two people moving about the shadowy night whispering perhaps sweet nothings. could it be vampires or witches.
However,
"You smell so lovely,"
This line makes me think of none other than human beings. Of course I could be wrong. Poet has his own visions of beauty.
I am reviewing this rhyming verse for your up coming WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations and have a wonderful day!
This poem is impressive because you imagined yourself as a possible ghost. The verse shows how fast things change and places do not remain the same after few years of absence. Like you said it is no longer recognizable with trees felled and houses gone.
Quick changes in urbanization and developing business are beyond our guess.
"They felled the cherry tree, and the houses went away."
Yes, it is rather sad that things do not remain the same after the passage of time.
Rhyming verse reflects the regret at the way things happened. Imagery shows the replacement of the old familiar scenery.
It is my pleasure to review this poem for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing one more year at the WDC. Have a great day!
I chose this poem because it appeared special. It is about kids of all ages. You wrote it from the view point of children. Yes, we come across all kinds of them, some very polite, some not so. Yet the fact that they are all children and easily mouldable. You have shown the problem as well as the solution. That's great.
I like the descriptive passages and the song-like sequences. They move rhythmically.
"We are connected by a strand, on a web with every man-
respecting others means that I'm respecting me.
Imagery is visual and appeals to mind as well."
the information you gave is useful. My husband fell sick a while ago and is not able to get enough vitamin D. The vitamin D3 you use could be useful for him as well. I need to talk to his Doctor and get him the supplement.
The fact that it has other benefits as well is encouraging. Like it is in your case, my husband is advised not to consume milk or milk products.
I am reviewing this wonderful real story for your Wdc Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing a year of creativity at the WDC. Have a fine creative day!
Well, this story is repeated almost everywhere on the globe. You have brought in the novelty by introducing the deer, which actually lives in the forest. Deforestation has become one of the most dangerous features of modern world. The greedy businessmen fell the trees and find new sources to make money, more money. They loot the animals of their habitats and render them homeless. How long can they move into the bowels of the forest? How long can a forest stretch?
You told the story in a fascinating manner. You showed how it happened in days. How long it took the deer to understand its ultimate fate.
" He blinked, recalling the forest once more, as it was before they came, then he too, turned toward the deep forest and moved on."
The above sentence is truly moving. The death of trees means the annihilation of the animals to a great extent.
Thank you for sharing a wonderful story written in clear and fluent prose style.
It is a wonderful thing to know about your Mom. She appears to be extraordinary. Few people have the kind of courage to battle the cancers and diabetes. Yet she is inspiring enough for the younger generation as well as her contemporaries to face life as it comes and be happy and zestful ever.
I congratulate you and your siblings on having an adorable mom. I pray and hope that she lives for a long time to bring smiles to others around her.
Hi,
I am reviewing this poem for your up coming WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on the completion of one more year with the WDC.
This is a mesmerizing poem on Chess. The game itself is captivating and highly engaging. You have described the way to move the various pieces of chess towards the conquest of the opponent.
"The knights weren’t forgotten the night of the spell,
forsaken though, quite . . . they were all cursed to “ell”!"
The knights and the rook, bishops and the pawns have their weak points and were shown to have come under the strong spell of the one of the queens. In this game of fantasy, both queens seem to be equally ambitious.
And so to the end we draw.
In this fantasy game I see (I hope I am right) both the queens challenge each other and finally we are left with total destruction.
"And, because such force the queens had amassed,
Both kingdoms, their world, spun slowly to glass."
Rhyming and rhythm bespeak of war and its end of winning.
This review is for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing another memorable year of creativity at the WDC.
Have a wonderful anniversary!
This piece of writing is realistic and so very inspiring. People may part but the memories stay forever.
Maureen is such a sweet character. She is human enough to feel depressed for not having Mason by her side for this Christmas, but she is also courageous to go ahead and celebrate it as a sign of love and respect for her husband. The hand-made piece made her go back to that part of her life, which she recalls with a big smile and love in her heart.
"With spirits renewed, Maureen lifted Garfield, with his fat orange belly and obstinate black stripes, and set him carefully onto the green hand-lettered blocks that said…BAH HUMBUG."
The end is well rounded. Language and style are smooth and fluent.
I am reviewing this poem for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congrats and Have a wonderful day!
This is a delightful poem of changing seasons in Oklahoma.
Each season is dealt with in a very spontaneous manner. The poet's reaction to each season very human and natural.
Each season is given a brief introduction, description and the effect of it on the poet.
So you know exactly what that particular season looks like and feels like.
"Spring toes right into summer,
with hot winds and thunderstorms,"
I like the prepositional verb "toes--into." Interesting usage. The stormy weather is arresting and attractive.
"Then the sky darkens,
the thunders roars,
lightning flashes,
the wind blows,
the farmer stops his machines,'
Free style poem flows well with visual imagery and sensory descriptions.
It is a beautiful poem describing the picturesque season of autumn. Mother nature makes us so aware of these changes of season that take place in a very silent and smooth fashion.
You have described the effect and result of the soothing autumn that precedes winter. All the more reason for people to make the best of it. Autumn dawns are cool and magical, the twilight time is so glorious and colorful. The whole day is inspiring enough and keeps us pleasant and healthy.
I am reviewing this short verse for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing one more year of creativity at the WDC. Have a lovely day!
The poem is telling. It shows how exhausted you were with "his lies". You showed it all in a very brief yet expressive voice.
The outward expression was just a tired exhaling of breath. Not a word of anger or exasperation. Kudos to your self control. Not all can boast of it. Not me anyway.
Hi Cubby,
It is a pleasure to review for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing one more year of fulfilling creativity at the WDC. Have wonderful day!
This poem mirrors truth about aging. However much one tries to stick to her or his former young looks, time is such a tyrant that all those romantic ideas are dealt with, with one look at the mirror.
I feel that it is so much more peaceful to accept the truth about self.
In the poem it is the grand daughter that makes the old lady realize that there is no alternative to understanding the passing of youth and middle years as well.
Just one sentence brought on that understanding. Great job!
""But that was before me.""
she is so frank and spontaneously truthful.
Is it that rare link between the grand parents and the grand children?
A nice inspiring poem. It tells me to shine like the stars, the little stars that fill the sky spreading luminescence.
This Free style poem inspires us to shed fear, which screens our true self. Fear has a long shadow on life. If I come out of the shadow, all I am left with is light, eye-filling light.
"light up the night sky with the beauty of your personality"
The metaphor of stars works well. If all the people shed their fear, inhibition, this earth would be a place full of earthy stars with bright inner happiness.
Thank you for the nice poem that flows well with telling imagery.
this review is for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing another year with the WDC. Have a fulfilling day!
This particular character study is strangely moving. Some parts made tears well up in my eyes. Why can't people leave him be.
When I read of the man pouring soda on him, I was deeply moved to tears. Is that the way to test his consciousness? yet, I do believe some have such boorish ways.
As you have done, he makes us think of who he is and why he comes there just to sit and stare. There must be something that made him come to the same spot everyday and at the same hour.
A glorious tribute to someone who is dear to the poet.
All the virtues of the departed soul are highlighted and makes the reader imagine how good a soul she was.
Using the figures of speech enhanced the effect what the poet wants to talk about.
"No matter how threatening was the breaking of the bough"
Her physical beauty and mental resilience have been praised agreeably.
"Your strong guidance still experienced
Your legacy will never be forgotten...."
The whole poem gives an impression that lady who is no more, was friendly, pleasant, helpful and courageous.
No wonder you miss her so much.
A moving free style poem with effective use of words and line endings.
September brings memories flooding into the mind as you go through the heat and the coolness of the sea in September.
"A sunny month, with each and every ray
of solar giving lapped up by us peeps,"
Human mind is such wonderful recording machine, that nothing escapes it and it never forgets. You have recalled events and the weather and the varied experiences served by life.
Comparisons and metaphors excel as in
"like time dressed in his Sunday
best,.."
Prompt well explored.
Ordinary events attain a new glamour as you dress them with your imagery and flow.
Small things of shared love and memories attain more value than that which meets the eye like,
"an address,
a street, a town,
a house number
or a car on the drive..."
You have shown what a home means to you in appealing imagery and more appealing thoughts.
The symbols of love that you use are novel and unique.
" two toothbrushes, side by side
in that mug
from Ireland, remember,.." one thought giving way to another, yet it is all inter-linked, like an extended simile or metaphor.
This is the kind of poetry that remains with me for future reference.
I am here to review for your WDC Account Anniversary. Congratulations on completing one more year with the WDC.
This short verse highlights the aspects of courage. You have combined courage with other virtues like faith, hope, dauntlessness and humility. This is the appealing feature of this free-style poem.
It mirrors the image of a person, who possesses these qualities.
The poem has a rhythmic movement that make it flow well.
Write on!
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