Dear Daniel,
I saw your suitcase on the Anniversary Review page and thought I'd drop in to honor this occasion, your 1st WDC Anniversary!
I'm sorry, but I do not see poetry in this. It almost sounds like a rant than anything else. I tried to read it as a poem, put some flow to it, maybe a bit of rhythm. But that didn't happen, no matter how hard I tried. Maybe you meant this to be poem, and maybe it looks like one on your computer, but it doesn't here on WDC. A poem should be formatted with shorter lines than you use here. It doesn't have to rhyme, but it needs a flow to it. Without any type of formatting, it's hard to look at it as a poem. If I may, here is an example of your poem formatted so it looks better, with a little wording change here and there to help it read smoother.
Deep Down
Inside each of us is a person no one sees.
We're so much more than just flesh and skin.
Under all the blood and veins,
Hidden within our complex brains,
Are stored our emotions, feelings, and pains.
Sometimes we may bring them out,
Often times they remain locked up, stored away,
Repressed and rarely felt are the emotions.
These feelings we tend to hide.
Like shields, they protect us,
Like masks, they conceal us.
Behind a wall they stand still,
Pressed so stiff against these walls,
Afraid to move, scared to come on through.
The heart has many secrets as well,
Hidden deep, sometimes afraid,
Oftentimes cold, like the bottom of the well.
These emotions, these feelings,
Lie asleep, dormant, brought out only by anger or pride.
You should use these emotions, release these feelings locked away,
Don't be afraid to be yourself, to live for the day.
Emotions and feelings should never be hidden away.
This is just my take on how this could look when formatted as a poem. Sometimes in poetry, less is more.
Sum1
WDC POWER RAIDER
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