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Review Requests: ON
3,160 Public Reviews Given
3,208 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Casual for the most part. I will point out errors I see and offer suggested corrections. I like to focus on the content and formatting of the item. I love providing helpful comments and feedback that may improve the item if acted on.
I'm good at...
I like to provide suggestions to the author on things I see that may need a second look. I'm not afraid to do a little research to verify a poem's format, or the contents of a story (if requested).
Favorite Genres
Mystery, Horror, Sci-Fi, Comedy, and Suspense
Least Favorite Genres
Honestly, I will read anything if asked. I just prefer those listed above.
Favorite Item Types
Short stories, novellas, books (though a review of that may take days/weeks due to my schedule), Poetry of any format.
Least Favorite Item Types
I find non-structured poetry difficult to review, unless there is a short disclaimer about this non-structure that would help in understanding the reason it's in that particular format.
I will not review...
I'm not interested in Vore, In and Out's, Growing/Shrinking, or other items that are similar to one of these.
Public Reviews
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1176
1176
Review of 'It'  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Matt,
I like the story you tell here, and never really thought about the naming of anything, let alone cats. Your rhyme scheme is very good, and the poem flows along pretty well. If I may offer an opinion, the first and last verses don't have nearly as nice a flow to them as the middle ones. Is this due to it being a certain type of poetry that I'm not familiar with, or just how you wrote it. Whatever the case may be, I hope you found a name for your cat. :)

And a personal Happy WDC Anniversary from me!

Sum1
1177
1177
Review of The Life of Love  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 18+ | (1.5)
Glambert,
First, let me say this is a different sort of story; I was pretty surprised to see a woman wrote it. It's interesting, but to be honest, it needs a lot of work. Things i found appealing about it:

1. The story. It's not often I've read a story about a gay man written by a woman. It's interesting, and has a lot of potential.

Things I thought need to be looked at:

1. There are numerous misspelled words throughout, so many that it would take me an hour to go through them all.
2. You use of grammar needs to be reviewed. In some cases, you use quotation marks to start someone speaking, but never close them (or stop them talking).
3. Your story has a nice beginning, a decent middle, but falls apart at the end. In fact, I can't say it has an ending, it just stops.

Please don't take this as petty criticism, I would love to see this edited and the errors corrected, then come back and re-rate it once you have done that. Remember, it's a good story, it just needs some work. No one writes a perfect story the first time through, not even published authors. I hope you do get this done.

Sum1
1178
1178
Review of Butterflies  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Gabrielle,
This is a nice poem you have here, but can it be longer? It is nice as it is, but you can do a lot with this if you put your mind to it. Your rhyming is pretty good, but the rhythm is a bit off in some cases, particularly the second to last line in the second verse. If i may offer a couple of suggestions:

1. The droplets of rain fell onto my skin, Change 'onto', to 'on'.

2. I sighed, looking at the paper in the bin Maybe this instead? I sighed, looking at the paper bin. Nothing is changed, but the rhythm is better.

3. You use the word 'I' for the start of 4 lines. In the last line of the first verse, maybe change that to read, 'Then sat and wrote, so many things'

4. In the second verse, just change this line. I smile, feel's like my heart got hit by a thousand gongs, to this,, My heart's been hit by a thousand gongs, Plus, another one of those 'I' s (plural) is gone too. :)

In poetry, sometimes, less is better. :) Well done though, I look forward to reviewing more of your work.

Sum1
1179
1179
Review of Nobody  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Gracie,
That's a very cute poem there, and a nice play on words. I've heard something along those lines long ago, but not quite like that I think.. Well done, for the first time in while, I'm at a loss for suggestions, or criticisms.

And a personal Happy WDC Anniversary from me!

Sum1 (See, I'm sum1, not any1, or no1, but Sum1),, :)
1180
1180
Review of Sidney's Poetry  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Nicki,
Your daughters talent is very good, I really hope you continue to work with her in improving it. I guess the saying, "She's a chip off the (not so) old block" rings true here, huh! Tell her congratulations on her efforts for me.

And a personal Happy WDC Anniversary from me.

Sum1
1181
1181
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (3.0)
Corena,
This is a lovely poem of free flowing verse, I feel your passion throughout. The message you send to this stranger is wonderful, and while it doesn't rhyme completely throughout, I think you meant it that way. Once in a while I stumbled over a line that was longer than the other, but it was good overall. You may want to look at it a bit to correct minor grammatical errors.

1. Maybe I have seen you and not have know its you Maybe I have seen you and not have known it's you

2. But I know your real! I know your there! I know your not just a dream!... But I know you're real! I know you're there! I know you're not just a dream!...

3. I'm inlove with you! I'm in love with you!

Very nicely done, I look forward to reading more of your works.

Sum1
1182
1182
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Eric,
To someone who has never been in a writing class, this is a real eye opener. (I'm betting I didn't word that sentence right either, but I will not worry about that.) I did well in all my classes in school, except English! To this day, I do not know a verb from an adverb, and participles? Forget it! I love to write, would like to think I'm pretty good at it, but I know my failings. I have placed this item in my favorites so I can refer to it when I want, which may be often. :) This is so well written, and you know so much more about the English language than I do, that I'm hesitant to even say there may (emphasis on may) have been one small error in this. I think you left out the word 'to' in the sentence below.

True, it's more fun for your insides do flips, like the Corkscrew, but your story is no amusement ride.

True, it's more fun for your insides to do flips, like the Corkscrew, but your story is no amusement ride.

Thank you so much for writing something so informative, I know it will help me improve.

And,,, A Happy WDC Anniversary to you!

Sum1
1183
1183
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Karl,
I've read another poem written along these lines, and find this type of poetry absolutely fascinating. Does it have a name for it (like Kyrielle, I love kyrielle poems too). This is so well written, you almost lose yourself in it. The one flaw in this type of poem, or maybe it's a good thing, is that there aren't that many lines, even though it seems there are, since 2 lines in every verse are repeated in each verse. Still, the form intrigues me. Well done!!

And a Happy WDC Anniversary from me to you!

Sum1
1184
1184
Review of Tulle soul  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (3.0)
Oscar,
i would really like to rate this well, give it a higher rating. But i read through it, have through it twice, and for the life of me, i can't figure out what this poem is trying to tell me. It reads like a dream, incoherent, jumbled, confused. Sometimes i think i start to understand, then the next verse starts describing something different entirely. Forgive for not understanding what you're trying to tell me here.

Sum1
1185
1185
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Coder,
Very nice story here. The dialogue seemed a little stilted at times, but very interesting nonetheless. Just one question, what was that stench? You mentioned the septic line, but was that it?

Your use of grammar was good throughout the story, and kept me interested. But what i liked most was the plot. :)

Well done, and Happy WDC Anniversary!

Sum1
1186
1186
Review of Unnatural Tears  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (2.0)
Taywor,
You have a very interesting story here. I liked how you have differen't points of view from each character, and the twists to the plot kept me interested. However, there are so many spelling errors that it is very difficult to read. Some of your grammar usage left me unsure of what you were really trying to say. If you will check your spelling, and correct your grammar, i'm sure you'll see this getting a lot of positive reviews.

Sum1
1187
1187
Review of Two Hearts  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Melissa,
What a nice 'poem',, errr,, story,, :) Only one critique comment,

Husky, deep murmurs in the near silence, urgings, taking her under, under his spell, his wishes becoming her desires.

i know what you meant here, but i think it reads better with just one of them.

Now,, a poem format for you,,, (this is for you, i do not have a copy of this,, ) :)) (And forgive me if i offend you by using your story in a poem format, i just thought i'd show you how this could be a poem)

Two hearts beating in time
Sensations surging and ebbing in their minds
Each of them filled, climbing new heights
His touch, her feel, emotions running high

Fingers intertwined, interlaced overhead
Their bodies sweating profusely all over the bed
Her taste so salty, yet sweet but still,
Her honeyed skin entices him, breaking down his will

His eyes fill with desire, maybe something more
Husky murmurs in near silence, he consumes her core
His weight so much greater is welcomed, even treasured
His teeth nibble lightly, bringing intense pleasure

Their longings are heightened with each loving thrust
Heat pooling, bodies pounding, filled with love and lust
Little gasps, catches in her moans, drive him toward a peak
Together they find release, lie there together, so weak

Two hearts beating in time
Fingers interlaced, intwined
Two souls, closely touching still
Like no other ever will


see,,, you could do it,, :) My gift to you,,, :)

Jim
1188
1188
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (3.5)
Lane,
I love the message of your poem here, very nicely done. Your story is what makes this a nice read, but if i can offer a couple of suggestions for you....

1. This seems to alternate between free flowing verse, and rhyming poetry. You could easily change this a little so every line rhymes with the one before it, like an aabb format for each verse. If you have trouble coming up with rhymes for words in a line, look at Rhymezone.com, it's a big help to me.

2. Center the text on the page. See Writing.com help on how to do this, it will make the poem that much more conducive to a nice read.

All in all, a very nice poem, i would be happy to review it once again if you like,,,,,

Sum1
1189
1189
Review of Devils Food  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.0)
Janice,
It's always nice to read something that is written for children, or things one does for, or with them. Your rhyme scheme is very good, but once in a while, the rhythm threw me off a little, with one line or another either a little short, or long, than others near it. All the same though, it was a very enjoyable read. Well done!

Sum1
1190
1190
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
You do have a different outlook on things it seemsa, just keep it up! The world needs more people like you. :)

Sum1
1191
1191
Review of Short Shot Entry  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Tarryn,
What a wonderful story!!! I am working on one for this same contest, hoping i can find time to write more, and it is far different from this. I love how you had the tire be the narrator of the story. A nice unique view, something i did in a previous entry for 'Inspiration Station', called 'The Steps'. My favorite part was the whole thing, how the tire reminisced about 'the good old days'. I saw only one thing you may want to look at:

The back left back tyre had wept silently for days after they took them. Did you mean to use 'back' twice in that sentence?

Very good though, I Love It!

Sum1
1192
1192
Review of A Bed Tells All  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.0)
Avergerdes,
Please remember that i am just an author like yourself, offering only my opinion about your item here. This is such a cute poem! your rhyming is good, the rhythm flows very well, keeping the reader engrossed in the poem/story you tell. If i may make one comment/suggestion:

i don't think flaws rhymes very well with yours (i had to say the two lines out loud to really hear them correctly). Would this work? (Or, of course, something you choose,,, just a thought is all)

I’m comfy, and cosy, I'm better than the floor
To yawn, stretch or fart, I am forever yours.

Either way, very well done!!

Sum1
1193
1193
Review of The Old Vampires  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.5)
Magoo,
I Love It! Such a very cute poem that rhymes very well, and with ten syllables per line, the rhythm is great too. Just a small humble opinion and suggestion,,,

1. Make it a little longer! :)
2. In the last line, swap the word are, and again.

Very well done!!

Sum1
1194
1194
Review of Unencumbered  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Ken,
Excellent job, and congratulations on a winning entry! This truly a deserving winning entry, I loved your rhyme, rhythm, and story.

Sum1
1195
1195
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
UniquelyMe,
This is such a sad tale of poetry here. First and foremost, I am sorry for your loss, I lost my father when I was seventeen, and never came to terms with it until six months later. Once I'd cried my heart out, I was done. I consider myself lucky in that. I would love to see you add to this, and tell us how you manage the rest of the year. Or maybe some warm memories you have of time spent with your father. This is nice as it is, it tells us how your heart breaks each year on the same day. But there are 365 days in the year, so tell us the rest!! :) Very well written though, the reader could feel your pain.

Sum1
1196
1196
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (3.0)
Eiderdown,
I liked the start of this story, even the whole concept. We've all been there on terminal hold ourselves, so it's easy to relate to Lisa's problem. But it seemed as if the story ran out of steam, as if you weren't sure where you were going with it. Some questions left unanswered for the reader:

1. What happened to the job she was trying to do, testing the code?
2. Did the service provider ever come back to her? Surely they could have found someone competent there to help her, or maybe the problem was beyond their control.
3. Or maybe,,,,, her and that person talked, maybe he could help her, maybe a romance blossomed. There's a lot that you could have done with this to complete the story.

I will be quite happy to return and re-rate this if you edit it at all. It's a good story, a good premise, but i think it needs completion, an ending.

Sum1
1197
1197
Review of Clandestine  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Gwen,
What a nice story, one that brings back a fond memory. You did well in telling a short story about two 'strangers' meeting for the first time. I think my favorite part , was their initial meeting, how the looked at each otrher, and nothing goes as they'd discussed,,, not right away at least. All too true, and it's great!! Thanks for the wonderful read!

Sum1
1198
1198
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: E | (4.0)
Janice,
I find this to be a very sad, brutally sad, poem. The one thing I've never understood, is a man hitting his woman, no matter what the reason. Your story is told well, with a nice rhyme to it. There were a couple of lines that didn't seem to flow well with the rest of the poem, but they fit in the story, and I'm not sure I have a suggestion for an alternative wording. Specific examples are:

1. The first verse has 11, 12, 10, and 9 syllables per line, and for me, that was okay. But the third verse dropped off quite a bit from that (8, 10, 6, 7). I think this poem would be perfect at the 10-11 syllable rate per line. Easier said than done I know.
2. I have no self-esteem left inside, (9 syllables)
All I want to do is hide. (7 syllables) It just throws off the reader once in a while is all. How about,,,,

I have such little self-esteem inside,
That all I want to do, is run and hide.

Each of those lines has ten syllables. :)

These are very minor points I mention, the poem as it stands is very good! And one more thing if I may.... Don't be afraid to use comma's in your work, it gives a natural pause to the reader when reading. :) But really, very well done!!

Jim
1199
1199
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Redtowrite,
Just one word from me about this,,,

Bravo!!!

What a wonderful, enjoyable read. And no, you are not selfish. I have no comments to improve this, I didn't even bother looking for flaws. Very impressive!!

Sum1
1200
1200
Review of A Reviewer's Sigh  
Review by Sum1 Is Home!
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Candleb*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *Candlev*


Countess,
I had two surprises today! First, i find you on my list of fans, then i find it's your WDC birthday! So happy birthday!

Your poem is wonderful, who ever told you you can't write poetry. It tells a nice story, rhymes well, rhythm flows very well, caught me in it's web immediately!! Well done!

And a personal Happy WDC Birthday,,,

Sum1
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