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1,414 Public Reviews Given
1,417 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Casual, friendly. I'll point out typos when I see them and make suggestions about quality, characters and logic, besides telling you how I feel about the piece.
I'm good at...
Does it make sense? Are the characters well portrayed? What's the overall feel of the piece?
Favorite Genres
Poetry, children's, anything rated E
Least Favorite Genres
Anything higher than 18+
Favorite Item Types
Poems, flash fiction, essays, articles, biographical/personal, etc
Least Favorite Item Types
AI Generated Content of Any Kind.
I will not review...
NSFW or AI generated content. Please do not send me anything that comes back from QuillBot AI detector as more than 25% AI generated. I will check and decline it.
Public Reviews
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51
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In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Purple Princess!

I feel the need to point out the difference between a crossword and a word search... I'm sure it won't take much of thought for you to understand *Smile* Word searches are definitely a lot easier to create than crosswords, because you don't have to fret about writing hints for people to come up with their own words to fit together. Lists of words are fun to make and fun to look for.

As someone equipped with a phone and an iPad, I can't actually solve any of the word searches we create around here. The closest I can get is to print one out and solve it the old-fashioned way, with a pen and paper. This is a great selection of words related to the birthday milestone, and it looks like you did a great job making it.

I might suggest "decorating" it a little, by picking a cover art and adding a fun gif in the description, or a string of cute emojis... Maybe some of the brand new ones being released *Delight*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*
52
52
for entry "What is 25?" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Sox!

I'm here as a fellow member of PPC6 *Smile*

Twenty-five years... A silver anniversary, as I've heard, and a remarkable milestone indeed. Google itself is older, but they were never exactly a "social media" site or anything comparable to WdC. Ooh, we can't forget the quiz from Samberine Everose Author Icon - a perfect score earns you an exclusive MB *Delight* I remember I flunked it in 2023 and aced it in 2024...

I love how you've laid context for the number, both positive and negative. A number only makes sense in the real world in context: 25 what? You run us through a helpful list of things, from dolls in a collection to the percentage of actual hazelnuts in that yummy jar of Nutella *Hungry* (what, Nutella is only 13% hazelnuts *Shock2* what's the rest, chocolate flavored sugar glop?)

A fun and respectful free verse poem exploring the number 25. I enjoyed reading it.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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53
Review of Wheel of Fortune  Open in new Window.
for entry "September 2, 2025" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Greetings!

I'm here as a fellow member of the PPC6 challenge *Smile*

A stern warning from Mother Earth... I'm trying to remember what Ragnarok means, and all I can come up with is something to do with Thor and Marvel... *Pthb* A quick Google search shows me it's the Nordic version of the apocalypse. Got it...

Your theme reminds me of the old poem Ray Bradbury quoted, "there will come soft rains." When humanity is out of the way, the earth will renew itself, starting with the smallest and most humble life forms: algae, bacteria, mites. Then insects, plants, etc... If humans ever get recreated, hopefully they'll have more sense than we do now.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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54
54
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings!

I love this quaint, amusing and thoroughly British poem. It shares all about what happened in whimsical rhymes that make it fun and enjoyable. You include lots of visual details like the French onion soup and the people in costumes. This keeps it grounded in relatable moments that make us smile and hope you had a better picnic day some other time *Laugh*

I might suggest using Size 4 Verdana font to make sure your item stays focused on the page and to ensure a compatible reading experience for all. Genres are a key element of all items here: I would suggest Environment, Nature, Experience, Community, Entertainment, Regional, or Family.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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55
55
for entry "Morning" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings, Ned!

I'm here as a fellow member of the PPC6 challenge, though I don't know if Lilli will set up the review incentive forum this time around. I love having these soft, easy things to review, especially now when it's party time!

You have such a way with poetry, crafting striking and unique images which make good use of the prompts. I can feel the pain of the narrator as they desire to wipe away the pain of their loved one. It's a haunting theme, one that carries a lot of weight these days with so much suffering in the world.

It balances nicely, though I've heard one should vary the line lengths a bit more. But poetry is like painting - anything goes!

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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56
56
Review of 25 Years  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Fyn!

A poem honoring you and your hubby - how sweet! I love how you're always one of the first to get the poem posted. I like to let mine settle a bit before getting started.

This is balanced nicely on the page, with an easy flow like a handwritten Hallmark card. In fact, you can write it out or type it up on a word processor with fancy script and hang it on the wall or give it as a gift to your beloved.

All the best wishes for you to be together as long as possible! Marriage is a beautiful thing, and when two people make it work for any length of time, it's a joy to see.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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57
57
Review of Promptly  Open in new Window.
for entry "Our First Kiss" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, sir!

I don't believe I've ever reviewed you before. Nice to meet you here with the Promptly Poetry Challenge *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* I love a decent poet, and you seem quite gifted.

This is a charming, sweetly romantic poem about love and that magical first kiss. You've painted the same old, same old picture - tale as old as time - with a gentle artistry that tugs on our heartstrings. Someone else might gag at such goofy sweetness, but as a person deeply familiar with cutesy pop music like Ed Sheeran, I can quickly identify and appreciate this. I hope it has some autobiographical sincerity, as you tap into a lifetime of beautiful memories to create heartfelt poems for this challenge.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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58
Review of Three For Tea  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Crissy!

I really enjoyed this quick, sweet story about a little girl and her daddy. It tugs on the heartstrings and helps us think about how we would lead our children spiritually when they begin asking questions. I appreciate the large, clear font and the three genres you've selected. And I love how Daddy accepts that his girl is interested in Jesus and is willing to bring her to church to learn about Him in a safe and affirmative way, even if he doesn't believe in Jesus himself.

I found the leap from Daddy saying "People in my work believe differently about how we are made" to Cindy thinking Jessica is telling her that Jesus made us, to be a little bit of a stretch logically for a young girl. Perhaps a little more exposition there would clarify things. Oh, and you should clarify that the cookies are "real" play cookies, otherwise there's no way for Daddy to know she gave Jesus two cookies. Also, you may want to add a pretty cover art to the item, to draw others in to read it, especially kids.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartO*
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59
Review of The Sun Also Sets  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Greetings, Hooves... Or Thing...? *Yikes* *Hand1* *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

Ahh, a cute cow story! I never particularly cared for Ernest Hemingway, probably because I wasn't mature enough to understand the subtleties of his writing as I grew up. I remember some story of his in my literature books, about a woman and a man and an affair on the savannah and lions and... It just seemed rather dreary and depressing.

This is such a charming little story. I love the way you spoke in the voice of the bull and reminded us of how sad and unjust bullfighting is. I never understood what the point of it is. It seems cowardly. I like the idea of giving Hemingway a new perspective on bulls and how to write about them. Is that a subtle pun, writing compadres? Cool!

Lovely large font, an explanation at the bottom, three solid genre choices... I can't think of anything helpful to suggest, as per Annette's requirements. Honestly, I can't imagine why someone would criticize this harshly. It's understandable as a bit of lighthearted fun that gets one thinking. Perhaps the footnote would be better as a tidy dropnote placed at the beginning of the story.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartO*
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60
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Dad!

Created in 2017... that means your lovely baby granddaughter is now eight years old *Shock2* oh my, how time flies. Those children grow up so quickly. I remember wondering why everyone always said how quickly it happens; being a rather solitary soul growing up, I had little concept of time and was just a kid myself anyway. My first realization of my own adulthood came as I watched the children of Imagine Dragons lead singer Dan Reynolds growing up... Arrow is a wonderful young lady. She was always mature beyond her years. Ah, now I'm digressing...

Your limerick is a joy to read, as we see your sheer delight in announcing the birth of your second grandbaby. The lines rhyme creatively and whimsically, and I have just one tiny suggestion that popped into my head as I read it.

Are you aware of how adorable otters are? They're so cute, I actually had a Merit Badge made... *Cue the search...*

Merit Badge in Otterly Adorable [Click For More Info] [Link To User greenwillow] , This final merit badge of your Chocolate Fudge Cake package is almost as sweet as the cake itself *^*Bigsmile*^* Rachel *^*Heartv*^*


Therefore, you may want to consider saying "she's as cute as an otter" to create a more sensible rhyme. Who wouldn't want to be compared to a sweet, cuddly baby otter?

Best wishes for your lovely family this upcoming holiday season *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartO*
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61
Review of By the Book  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Greetings, Loti!

This was an exciting story, sharing the experience of a young college student as her fiance becomes enraptured by a creepy book, far more powerful than anything we could imagine. I waited breathlessly to see if she could rescue Allen. The ending was worth it.

I would recommend you add a third genre to the item, more relevant to the eeriness of the subject at hand, such as Paranormal, Supernatural, Gothic, or something similar. I also feel as though something is lacking in your writing style... I hate trying to say this to people because it's so subjective, and I feel inadequate to explain the instinctive feeling. But somehow, it felt as if your characters were not really alive, as if they were all speaking their parts like a stage play. I can't even begin to suggest what I might change about this... It's just a silly feeling of mine. Please don't take it to heart.

You have good skills of description, giving us the spring scenery contrasting with the mysterious events, and there's enough mention of physical emotional responses such as chills and panic. It's definitely a fun read, albeit maybe somewhat trite and even perhaps predictable. But a good story to read after dark, for sure.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartO*
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Review of Silence  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Cheshire!

This is a splendid poem, overstuffed with grand thoughts and profound imagery. It develops the concept of silence, that lack of audible noise, and explored how noise doesn't always carry as much significance as the simplicity of silence.

The lines are balanced, with matching lengths that lend it the feel of a careful structure without the excess formality of stiff or awkward end rhymes. It flows freely and conversationally, moving between the negative and positive aspects of the power of silence. It also balances nature visuals with the inner thoughts of one's mind, bringing light to different kinds of silence, both internal and external.

I found this to be an impactful and thought-provoking poem, with a lingering reminder to value moments of peace and stillness. I would recommend using Size 4 Verdana font (what I'm using here) to help your words stand strong on the page for a clear and engaging reading experience.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartT*
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63
Review of Paws  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Kazi!

I hope you'll enjoy the WdC partying next week... I'm breathlessly excited *Delight*

Animals are so important to the human experience and for the Earth's wellbeing; if it weren't for animals, humans wouldn't even be here, really. They give us so much: love, joy, exercise, food, clothing, companionship, and providing a balanced ecosystem for our survival, besides glorifying our Creator and leading us to give thanks for His infinite creativity.

We see here a furry creature, most likely a dog or cat, personified, or given a voice. They plead with us to treat them kindly and care for them as fellow Earthlings, promising a sweet reward of unconditional love. So many dogs and cats are abandoned each year, it's heartbreaking. You have given us a poignant reminder to do our best to help out those creatures of God who cannot speak for themselves. The way one treats animals is highly indicative of quality of character... (Although sometimes one hears about Mafiosos who love animals... *Think*)

Your font size and style is easy to read, and your poem has a nice rhythm with different types of internal and external rhymes, flowing smoothly without being forced into a stiff, potentially awkward or limiting form structure. I would recommend adding a third genre such as Environment, Nature, Philosophy, Animal, or Relationship. This will help others find your poem when browsing and will also allow as many opportunities for Quill Award nominations as possible (for all the scoop on those, check out the portfolio of Jeff-o'-lantern 🎃 Author Icon)

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Heartt*
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64
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings, Rick!

I've had this in my review list for a while, but was never quite sure what to say about it. First off, I'd like to ask why it has the code "B-2" in the title. Is this indicative of a second draft or something like that? Perhaps you should remove that, because it appears to be a well polished item, able to hold its own.

Now, the premise is a little peculiar. Quite honestly, there's no way on the planet that a man can keep his back to everyone everywhere. When he was signing the guestbook, backwards, his face was facing outwards, and there must've been people behind him.

Putting aside the illogical nature of the premise, I like the way you've built up the atmosphere and gradually unfolded the lesson of it all. When we forget where we came from, we'll have a difficult time understanding where we're going. Even when we're running from pain, we need to be aware of where we're running to. The quiet surrealism of the setting and theme is a gentle reminder to take life seriously, hold on to our memories and honor our history.

I'll give my old suggestion of Size 4 Verdana font to ensure a pleasant reading experience for everyone. You should also add two relevant genres, such as Supernatural, Psychology, Paranormal, Drama, Relationship, or Folklore.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartT*

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65
65
Review of An Embedded Poll?  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, sir!

This is a fascinating poll, created about a year after WdC's inception, presumably to test the waters on how good of an idea it was. I stand amazed at the community you've created and supported untiringly for twenty-five years. It has stood the test of time and can boast against any other similar site out there. I know I would never dream of joining a different one.

The poll is set up engagingly, with plenty of options covering a range of feelings. Responses are anonymous, so it's quite safe to tell the truth about one's experience. With well over 3700 votes, the question has been answered with a definite "we love it here!" 94% of people either love it or enjoy it. This is a marvel.

I can't help wondering where exactly the poll has been embedded and whether there should be a little bit of description of why it was created. Perhaps some reflection is due on reaching this 2025 milestone.

Congratulations, and a million heartfelt thanks for all your years of hard work *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

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In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings and welcome to writing.com!

The first thing I want to get out of the way is your formatting. It looks like you uploaded a Word doc file, and it got rather askew in the transmission. What we usually do here is copy our text and paste it directly into the text entry box, and run italics, font size and such through the proprietary markup language. This way you can control paragraph breaks, excess spacing and such. Rather than a hashtag for scene breaks, you can use {center}***{/center}, which looks sleek *Smile* For all the secrets of WML, check out the "writing.com tools" link on the left sidebar and click on "Writing ML: Docs and Help."

Now, the exciting part: what I think of your story! I think it's great, combining humor and eeriness to craft a tale that is rooted in reality yet spins us off on a fantastic ride through a small town in Texas. We grow fond of Tom and his playfulness when he discovers his invisibility, and chuckle as he innocently terrorizes his neighbors. I'm a little puzzled about how he managed to keep his wallet dry even though the entire truck was rendered invisible... *Confused* I suppose that can be creative license, as he couldn't "steal" the noodles, and invisible money would be useless to everyone. Also, can we see the food once he finishes eating it? And the idea of that smashed truck lying around forever sounds quite unnervingly hazardous... The concept of invisibility creates so many weird questions...

Speaking of weird questions, I just started thinking about the old classic, The Invisible Man. I always thought that was such a depressing, meaningless story, and I'm really glad you made yours wholesome and happy while still capturing a surreal vibe. I mean, think how close Tom was to getting shot at by the cop when he played the basketball trick *Shock2*

Everything about this story was fun: the characters, the situations, the tension, the looming question of what would happen long-term, the relief when Tom "rebaptizes" himself in that mud puddle... I wish I could offer some substantial advice on improvement, something on a grainier level, but it's the end of a long day and I can't think of anything other than "great job."

It was a relaxing read, although perhaps I was a little impatient as Tom went around scaring people like a goofball *Laugh* You may want to reconsider the word count; I popped it into a word counter and came out with over 6,000. You should be aware that the Official WdC Contests allow only a 2,000 word limit. 6k is considered rather overlong around here, as over the years we have shifted away from being more of a novel workshop kind of site to a largely short form site. I guess you could say we've gone the way of social media sites like Twitter... Soundbites and attention spans, you know *Think*

Other than that, it was great, and I'm glad to have found it.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


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67
67
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings and welcome to writing.com!

What a great question: what if I do stop and enjoy life? It challenges all the unhappy thoughts that bounce through one's head, threatening to take down our well-being. We see the narrator take a deep breath and remember who they are, and that it's ok to be human and do things that give us our identity.

I love the tidy spacing and the short, quick free verse lines, drawing us down through the questions and leaving us to draw our own conclusions and themes. Why be bogged down in sadness and gloom when at the very least we can play some music to drown out the intrusive thoughts...?

You should add two more relevant genres to the item, so it can be more easily found when browsing and also to give as many opportunities as possible for Quill Award Nominations (for more information on The Quills, see Jeff-o'-lantern 🎃 Author Icon) I would recommend Drama, Psychology, Experience or Philosophy.

I think you should try entering this at "Shadows and Light Poetry Contest" Open in new Window., it seems like the sort of thing they'd appreciate. It's always great fun to win a ribbon on a deserving item *Smile*

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


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68
68
Review of Duke  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings, Kiya!

I've noticed this bopping around for a while now, and thought I'd check it out finally. I wasn't sure what to expect: darkness, despair, or absurd humor. You have such a knack for vividly portraying all sides of life. The story of a boy and a dog who never got along is both heart-wrenching and heartwarming, as we see the man signing off the ageing canine to a family who can give it the love it deserves. His character is striking; rather than exacting some kind of revenge or avoiding the situation, he faces up to it with as much kindness as he can muster up and ensures the dog has a secure future.

You used nice clear font, employing both paragraph spacing and opening line indents, which gives it maximum readability without appearing too tedious on the page. As a story for the Writer's Cramp, it's well crafted, with a memorable and unusual yet relatable situation. Not everyone likes dogs.

I need to get used to making at least one suggestion for improvement again, as per Annette's requirements next month. I would suggest making a dropnote with the notes at the bottom, rather than just lining them up. Actually, I can take a hint for myself... I don't think I linked the prompts or the activity when I did seven days of Writer's Cramp last September *Shock2*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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Review of Code Talkers  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Greetings, Steph!

Please excuse the template, it's ahead of time, but I'm just testing it out *Smile*

I really enjoyed this quick story; it has action, danger and tension without any gore, and it's rooted in history. We see the Navajo soldiers "up close and personal" as they perform their duties, supporting their fellow soldiers in the war. I remember reading about them in my history books, but it's always exciting to "see and feel" things, like watching a movie. I like the flow and the setting descriptions, and find it easy to understand (sometimes war stories can be a bit technical, with the guns and ships and whatnot...)

I would suggest moving the prompt, activity and word count info to the bottom of the page, perhaps in a dropnote. That way, we can get right into the story and avoid potential confusion of the datelines.

Thanks for sharing, take care, and keep writing *Heartt*
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Review of Sibyl  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings *Smile*

I discovered this quirky piece using the Random Read and Review button.

It's a cheeky, kid-friendly sort of myth, inspired by the Disney live action reimagining of The Little Mermaid. I like how it's rooted in an earthy, realistic setting, right down to the town and state and geography. If the setting and narrator is autobiographical, it's nice to meet you. I don't know if I've even read your bio since I've started reviewing your poetry as part of PPC5. Oh, congrats on finishing it!

The theme is universal and greatly appreciated, though I honestly don't think another message begging us for peace would do much. Also, what reasoning is behind the idea of everyone having black mermaid DNA? Is it a symbol of unity and a nod to our ingrained mystical instincts?

Cute and fun, I enjoyed it *Mermaid*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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Review of The Fallen Knight  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings and welcome to writing.com!

I found this by using the Random Read and Review button *Smile*

This is a deeply sad and highly metaphorical fable of a young boy crossing over to the next great adventure. We hang on tight, hoping to see him thrive, and feel a touch of anguish when it seems as though nothing more is to happen when the lights go out. Your frame of a daring knight escaping from prison is a fitting allegory for the universal human yearning for a release from the burdens of life lived in sickness and poverty. Unfortunately, the ending seems unhappy and fatalistic, as we see the journey end in exhaustion and darkness, with only a fleeting glimpse of what we might hope was heaven, rather than the boy reaching a heavenly reward or even a healing after surgery. I personally prefer a more faith based worldview, with the optimism of a happy ending making up for any amount of suffering in this life.

I would suggest you choose three relevant genres for your item, because it will put your story in front of as many people as possible who are searching, and it will provide your item with more chances to be nominated for Quill Awards. I might choose Spiritual, Mythology, Fantasy, Tragedy, Death, Philosophy, Teen, Drama, Dark, Gothic, or Psychology.

I found this to be quite striking and memorable, but perhaps your sentence structures could be tidied up a little more. Are you perhaps a non-native English learner? You have done well here; I can see you have a bright imagination. Perhaps you would like to use ChatGPT or Grammarly to help you see how your prose could be smoother.

I look forward to seeing more of your work around here. I'm glad to have met you *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile* *HeartT*


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72
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Review of Impatients  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Sox!

I'm here for I Write 2025 *Smile*

Ahh, we have here a thoroughly depressing and unfortunately all too relatable story. Who hasn't felt the frustration of missing the breakfast deadline by two minutes? The temptation to take it out on the cashier is strong, especially when one is hangry. As a neurodivergent person, I honestly much prefer using the kiosk or the mobile app than speaking to a human. Yet the technological hoops one has to jump through have their complications as well. There's nothing quite as awful as losing money on a technical glitch.

All the big stuff is done nicely here: font size, three relevant genres, prompt info, word count, etc. I'll just point out a few refining twiddles you may want to consider. First, is the title correct? Are you perhaps conflating impatience and "impatient people?" Or is that intentional? Then, the word "finally" is used twice within three sentences, which isn't recommended. Then, at the end, the word "going" is used twice in the same sentence. You may want to reframe these for a more refined prose.

Ok, I'm done nitpicking *Laugh* Great work! You've captured an instantly recognizable moment, and I sympathize for your characters.

Oh, best wishes for that ramp *Pray* I don't know what to say to help. You're in my prayers *HeartRate1*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


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Review of Start Here  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Jeffrey!

I'm back *BigSmile* This drabble looks like fun. I'll point out right at the beginning, your subtitle has a typo in it...

I love writing drabbles. There's something so satisfying about writing exactly 100 words, capturing a beginning, middle and end without having to worry about dragging out character development, dialogue, setting, pacing, and all the gazillion little frustrating things that come into play when writing a longform story. If you don't mind, I'll toot my own horn and invite you to stop by "Pocket Size Stories" Open in new Window. for adventures in drabbles - including the story of a band, told in three independent ones *Delight*

This one captures what feels more like a well-made vignette than a complete story. I don't usually fuss too much over what others tell me are the "rules" for drabbles, because I seem to have a pretty good instinct about them, but I guess it wouldn't hurt to go over them with you. Our Aussie pal S🤦‍♂️ Author Icon is prepping a drabble party for the WdC 25th Anniversary celebration in September, so I'm hyped about that.

So, yeah: beginning, middle, end, and conflict. There should be a resolution of some kind by the end, and conflict comes in several varieties: man against man, man against nature, man against machine, man against higher power, or flip any of those PoVs (for instance, nature against nature if you personify animals or machine against who knows what if you do sci-fi...)

Using these points, I see we have a man and a machine. I spot a contradiction in the use of the word "patience." He stared patiently at the screen, yet he didn't have the patience to use a pen and paper? Also, I want to be sure I have the twist down right. At first I thought maybe he was a police officer, a newbie. But it's fairly obvious by the end, he's the person of interest. Which leaves us with more of a tease than anything else, a glimpse of a potentially criminal mind at work. In fact, I just realized why he didn't want to write by hand - evidence *Shock2*

Wow, ok, now I'm impressed. That was quite clever. Perhaps you don't need any advice on this one after all *Laugh* What fun!

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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Review of Business As Usual  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings, Jeffrey!

I've spent the past couple weeks hopping around in your port, and I've quite enjoyed myself, mostly in the Flash Fiction folder. FF is a great way to pass the time and dabble in genres I wouldn't usually read, from crime and horror to tragedy and "shock jock..." Other times, such as this one, your work is downright hilarious. Be warned, I'll probably be doing a few more reviews for you through the end of the month, because I have a certain number of stories required for "The WDC Angel Army" Open in new Window. and it can be wearisome finding people and items I care for on a daily basis. Your briefer work is like brain candy, a box of chocolates... Some of them are a little wormy *Wink*

I love this–two bungling robbers *Rolling* No one gets hurt, and there aren't any dark twists (spoilers!) It's a bright, quick pop that had me chuckling along with the cashier. It would make a great YouTube skit.

As previously mentioned (I know it gets tedious to read the same recommendations over and over, so I'll try not to mention this again) the Contest Entry genre is a dead end when it comes to putting your items out there for people to find, or for Quill Award nominations.

Then, in the second sentence, a comma is needed between "gun" and "nonplussed." And it's "disappointment of" towards the end–love that moment! Also, the third sentence up from the bottom has the word "as" twice; I'm sure there's a better way to frame it.

I'm just nitpicking to make this worthwhile... I'm delighted with the story otherwise. Thanks for giving me a packed port to go through.

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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Review of Mosaic  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Ken!

Well, it isn't too often I find one of your items on the Random Read and Review button.

I love a good nature poem, and this one is lovely. You've painted mysterious dreamy pictures of things hidden in the mist, and given us a larger theme to ponder with the reminder to stop, look and appreciate the glories of a morning view. There's nothing quite as peaceful as having the early morning and sunrise all to yourself before the hectic rush of the day.

This is good enough to write out and make into a fridge magnet or something as a little gift. I'm happy to have been in a flurry and hurry and chosen the "motivated" review route for my daily review *Laugh*

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *HeartT*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
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