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Review Requests: ON
948 Public Reviews Given
950 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Casual, friendly. I'll point out typos when I see them and make suggestions about quality, characters and logic, besides telling you how I feel about the piece.
I'm good at...
Does it make sense? Are the characters well portrayed? What's the overall feel of the piece?
Favorite Genres
Poetry, children's, anything rated E
Least Favorite Genres
Anything higher than 18+
Favorite Item Types
Poems, flash fiction, essays, articles, biographical/personal, etc
I will not review...
NSFW
Public Reviews
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451
451
Review of The Well  
Review by
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,

I found this using the Random Read and Review button.

I wasn't sure if I should expect a dark twist at the end, or if it would be a cheesy retelling of the Jack and Jill nursery rhyme, but I'm happy to see it's a charming and innocent children's story.

Perhaps you could rewrite the subtitle to give us some idea of the story.

I found it easy to read and flows well. The idea of their surname being Pickle is quaint and old-fashioned.

It's a charming story, and the only thing I would suggest is to standardize the spelling of the word "necklace." You have it misspelled a few times.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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452
452
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, found this with the Random Read and Review button.

What a neat story. It's amusing and engaging and has a nice philosophical ending.

I liked Jerome's character and the backstory about his mom and dad. And the amusing detail of MSB's absurd superpower is fun.

I wonder who Jerome will marry. Will they do research to find the genetic probabilities of his kids having superpowers if he marries a superhero?*Laugh*

Thanks for sharing and congratulations on winning the contest. Take care and keep writing *Smile**Quill*

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453
453
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Well done. My eyes glaze over whenever the topic arises of determining syllable counts and following structures in poetry. I’m too much of a free bird for that… or too lazy, either way*Laugh*

It’s artistic and forms a gently autobiographical image. You’re improving your poetic skills, and I look forward to more.

Take care and keep writing*Smile*


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454
454
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,

I found this with the Random Read and Review button.

I really enjoyed reading it. Your free verse flows well and the thoughts and images connect nicely to create a compelling composition.

The idea of conveying feelings and friendship silently with body language is classic. You've given it a charming innocence by associating it with a mother cat and kitten. We know how important touch is for human babies to thrive, and this gives your words significance.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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455
455
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, I noticed this on the Read a Newbie sidebar.

Welcome to WdC *Smile* Glad you're here.

I'm not sure how seriously to take this introduction to you because it looks like a parody of Prince Harry. Is that what it's supposed to be? Or is that just a coincidence of my lack of cultural literacy? Of course I understand it's "tongue in cheek..."

Harry sounds intriguing; I'd look forward to learning more about him and his personality by reading what he writes. You can tell a lot from a person after you've read enough of their writing, whether they realize it or not.

Thanks for sharing, keep writing, and I look forward to seeing more of you around *BigSmile**HeartB*

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456
456
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
A cute little poem about children and role models.

We all should be reminded how much we become examples for the young people around us, whether anyone realizes it or not. The setting of healthy goals and expectations is important for their well-being.

Your rhyme is excellent and the meter flows well. I see no corrections or spots for suggestions.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*
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457
457
Review by
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi,

I found this on top of the Please Review page.

A brief vignette, sketching the scene of one of those annoying nights where you can't get to sleep for the life of you.

Well crafted and captures the irritating feeling in a few words. Albeit, there's no plot or resolution, which makes it a vignette rather than a flash fiction, I think (I'm not entirely sure about that.)

Anyway, thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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458
458
Review of Prophecy  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,

I found this using the Random Read and Review button.

I love the structure and how skillfully you employed it. It's nice to look at and pleasant to read.

The idea of using a scarecrow to illustrate the circle of time and passage of seasons is charming. It creates a picture in our heads and conveys the story more gently than if you used a person.

I appreciate the explanation at the end, it helps to clarify your intentions and the style of poem used.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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459
459
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Well...

I don't have much to say about this, as honestly I never saw the movie or read the unabridged book.

Instead of buying a copy of The Wizard of Oz for Christmas one year, Mom bought me Glinda of Oz, the last book in the Oz series. I don't think she even realized it was a different book entirely.

I found it fascinating and actually much more interesting than the standard Oz story that everyone knows, and I highly recommend it. Looking back on it, it was like a foreshadowing of my current nerdy delight in knowing my musical artists' deep cuts.

You've got a bit of a laundry list here with all the differences between the book and movie, but it's an engaging read. I didn't realize most of that; it's good to know.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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460
460
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I'm up late hanging out in your port, Joey*Laugh*

This is beautifully written and hits close. I'm glad you received a purple ribbon on it and I'm glad I found it this month. I've been thinking a lot about DV lately. Or at least, more than I usually do.

Anyway, I like the unusual POV and semi biographical feel of it, and the reminder to us all to treat everyone kindly, because we never know what they may be going through. I wonder if it's a true story about your wife's experience as a nurse, but perhaps I'm reading into it...

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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461
461
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,

I saw this on the sidebar and decided to check it out since it's flash fiction. It was a good idea to let us know in your subtitle.

I loved how quickly and skillfully you built the fantasy world and showed us the hard-working injured fellow.

The ending is so funny, all that suspicious potion making the old plant stand anew and proving it would probably have done the same for the guy (I made the assumption he's elderly but there's really no evidence of that.)

A cool piece of flash fiction, well-written and amusing.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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462
462
Review of More Lysol!  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi,

I finally got tired of seeing this advertised on the sidebar and decided to read it and satisfy my curiosity.

With 76 previous reviews over the past fifteen years, you probably don't need any advice or suggestions *Laugh*

From the subtitle I was expecting a short story, and I find it neat that it's actually a fairly brief poem. It doesn't drag on forever, and gets the point across without too much awfulness.

The rhyme scheme is clever and careful, and I like how the opening verse closes it, reminiscent of some creepy old ballad from the Elements of Literature.

And speaking of which, it also has an Edgar Allan Poe feel, with the dark irony and the narrator being the obsessed guilty party.

In all, a good piece. My timing of reading it during "spooky season" was perfect. Congrats on having it accepted in a magazine.

I may check out the rest of your portfolio someday*Smile*

In the meantime, thanks for sharing, take care and keep writing *HeartT**Quill*

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463
463
Review of The Clever Foxes  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi,

Using the Random Read and Review button again and found this*Smile*

It's adorable; I'm a big fan of children's literature and this is a fine example. You tell a simple story in charming language using forest animals, with a spiritual note at the end.

It seems a bit odd that "communication" would solve the problem of the bullies; I would recommend avoidance myself.

Your meter and rhyme flow well and make for an easy, enjoyable read.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartT*

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464
464
Review of The Wallet  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi,

I saw this on the newsfeed and stopped by to read it.

I really like the story of a woman traveling to be with her friend and getting a miraculous good deed. The little details, like the rest area, the Subaru, and washing up in the morning add so much realism to it. The ending was sad and heartwarming at the same time, as we see an apparent robbery (are you implying it had something to do with the nice young man?) and the kindness of a stranger.

I would suggest changing the primary genre from “contest entry” to something related to the subject like “community” or even “folklore” (it’s ok if one of your three genres is a bit of a stretch.)

Also, you’ve used the default small font, which may be difficult for people to read and tends to give things a “boring” feel. I personally set most of my fonts at size 4 or 3.5.

Thanks for sharing this, I enjoyed reading it. Take care and keep writing*HeartT*


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465
465
Review of Pandora 2020  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi, I found this with the Random Read and Review button.

I love your meter and rhyme, it’s so tidy and really adds to the poem quality.

The theme is excellent, with a clear-eyed view of today’s issues and a hopeful directive at the end. We are all contributing to the problems in some small way, and realizing this instead of blaming others is the first step towards a better world.

Thanks for sharing this, I really enjoyed it. Take care and keep writing*Smile* *HeartB*


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466
466
Review of Tired  
Review by
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Thank you for sharing this personal poem with us. It conveys your feelings in a smooth and flowing way with simple words. I find it quite relatable.

Your note of hope comes in the middle of the poem, and then the end dwindles out into a sort of unhappy fragment. Perhaps the hope could be saved for the end to leave us with a better feeling. But it has so few words anyway that it hardly matters.

Sending hugs and best wishes. Keep writing*Hug1**Smile**Hug2* *HeartP*

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467
467
Review by
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, I found your story using the Random Read and Review button.

This is hilarious; I love the buildup to the twist at the end, even though I suspected it early on. The main character is interesting, and it might be fun to see a sequel in which he visits the strange new world and is developed further.

You have a good writing style with no spelling, grammar or other minor errors. I enjoyed reading this.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile**HeartT*
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468
468
Review by
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi,
I found your poem by using the Random Read and Review button.

This is really sweet and funny. I love the gentle absurdity of the family situations you describe, and the way everyone loves and respects each other despite the issues. That's what makes a family, after all.

Your rhyme and meter flows well and creates an enjoyable read.

I have no suggestions for improvement *Smile*

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartT*

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469
469
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
A well-written explanation of how the process works. I think I understand it well enough to get the trinket.

I always have a hard time saying anything about items I'm reviewing, I don't know why. Especially poetry... I just feel bad making any kind of suggestions that aren't perfectly objective like Spelling, Punctuation And Grammar (or as our friend Joey likes to say, SPaG.)

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470
470
Review by
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Rated: E | (5.0)
A well-written explanation of how the process works. I think I understand it well enough to get the trinket.

I always have a hard time saying anything about items I'm reviewing, I don't know why. Especially poetry... I just feel bad making any kind of suggestions that aren't perfectly objective like Spelling, Punctuation And Grammar (or as our friend Joey likes to say, SPaG.)

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471
471
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Simply written, with repetition that drives the point home. Never miss a chance to live life the way you want to. I like the explanatory notes; they add context and help us understand your feelings. I am sorry for your loss.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartB*

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472
472
Review of About My Love  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
A charming and simple poem about love, creatively written.

I would suggest choosing a third genre for it to make sure people can find it when they search. Perhaps "personal" or "experience" would be suitable.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing *Smile*

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473
473
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Aww, this is so sweet and carries a lot of depth. The two babies are like us, wondering about what they do not know. The concepts of faith and skepticism in the mouths of preborn children is a wonderful idea and a charming way to convey your theme.

I would suggest changing the three genres to ones specific to what you've written so people can find your work. "Spiritual," "religious" and"philosophical" might be three that you can choose instead.

Thank you for sharing this with us. Take care *Smile*

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474
474
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Whoa, that was some story. I saw this bouncing around and didn’t try reading it until you dropped it in Kaden’s forum.

I love the voice you used, it feels very authentic and true. The use of the word “conscious” instead of “conscience” is ok here and gives it a rustic flair. It feels like something from Huckleberry Finn. I appreciate that you mentioned a specific herb, lobelia. Perhaps mentioning a couple of others would add to the realism.

The concept is creative and thoughtful, considering the fine line between healing the way God intended and taking control of what is out of our hands. I was a little confused about the timeline, that the old lady is reminiscing about something from way back, and at first it appeared that the father died naturally without intervention. But I read rather too fast.

A really neat story, I enjoyed reading it. Thanks for sharing, congrats on winning an award for it, and keep writing *Smile*



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475
475
Review by
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
No, you're right, Joey. There's nary a whisper of politics here, and I love it that way. It's so much easier to form a friendly community when I'm not worried about getting cancelled because I mentioned a hot button cultural issue. X, for instance (I pretty much left the place right around when the bird died, which was around when I joined WdC) was a site that I never truly felt comfortable on; I found a certain amount of popularity within a niche Frozen fan club, but when I tried to be more expressive of my other hobbies I was mostly ignored. And I couldn't engage in the hot topics because I don't fall along stereotypical party lines and would most likely be cancelled by both sides! (As you might remember I mentioned to you in an email where climate change came up *Smile*)

Anyway, I feel more comfortable and able to express myself here than I've felt anywhere else online. It's a great place, and if there is a silent rule about "no politics" that's fine with me*Laugh*

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject. Keep entertaining enlightening us*HeartT*

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