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Beachcomber
She's lost. Will he find her this time?
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Danica #1687 in Elysium: Part 3
This is Chapter C then Chapter 3 of my WIP novel. It's 5155 words.
Mini Turned Mighty
A science experiment goes awry.
The Others
Bard's Hall entry
A New Cycle
holly, ivy and mistletoe, yule logs, or wreaths
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/cuzzinjoe/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4
Review Requests: ON
2,010 Public Reviews Given
2,010 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Abric  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi Solomon's I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Abric" Open in new Window. by Solomon's

shared review image

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A well worded and very descriptive poem with six stanzas. A random rhyming scheme that all comes together for a very unique flow.

A very deep well described poem that I as well as many others I'm sure can relate to. It is those weak places in life and those darker times that try us and ultimately make us stronger into the being that we become. It is then that you realize how that you become strong from those weak times when no one was watching.

'---I rise—not because I’m fearless,
not because I never cry—
but because after everything,
there is still fire in my why.**---'
My favorite is the beautiful stanza above.

Solomon's thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
77
77
Review of Climax  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again HuntersMoon I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Climax" Open in new Window. by HuntersMoon

shared review image

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A well written and very powerful And descriptive poem describing a beautiful lady that could not recognize or perceive her true beauty until closer to the end of life.

This entertaining poem consists of five four line stanzas plus two lines for a beautiful twenty-two line poem.
A random rhyming scheme adds to the realistic flow of the strong work.

I knew when I saw 'HuntersMoon' that I was in for another classic work of art.


Artistic Voice and Imagery:Gazing Over the Sea of time, I see the image of a beautiful girl growing into a lady but not realizing how beautiful she was. Then through the currents of time she had some modifications surgically done to her body to make her feel as beautiful as she already was. She takes full advantage of this and lives life to its fullest. Only after that does she realize it was all a show. A roll she was born for with all she needed from the beginning.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics:With a work from ‘HuntersMoon’ there's no use checking the grammar, spelling or mechanics; it's always perfect.

HuntersMoon thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
78
78
Review of This Is Islam  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again Kenzie I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"This Is Islam" Open in new Window. by Kenzie

Clarity:A good title that describes the content of this article well.

Writing style:Religious educational opinion.

shared review image

Are all 3 genres listed?*Sly* Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader? *Sly*A nice structure that does make it easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*Sly*Yes.

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A well written unbiased article about people and their religions, focusing on the Muslim religion of Islam. Interesting start with Matin and his quote "You know I have to kill you." That is if he can not convert you. That seemed to start your study of religions, leading to this enlightening article.

Seems to be a fair comparison of Muslims and Masons. Explaining how only the higher levels of authority really know or understand the real reasons or meanings of certain phrases that lie beneath the surface.

No doubt that people don't want to hear negative comments about their faith. A good example of your unbiased nature is shown when you study how an individual came to the conclusion that caused them to be persuaded to believe as they do.

A nice touch with the question---“Do all Muslims interpret jihad and martyrdom in the same way?”--- followed by a reasonable answer explaining the difference between moderates and extremists.

I particularly found the information about ---'The Truth About Muhammad: Founder of the World's Most Intolerant Religion'--- to be extremely educational.

A great ending line --- 'Only by knowing both the positive and negatives that are being told and circulated about each faith will we truly begin to understand each other.'---

Kenzie thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
79
79
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Power Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Lea M Carrie I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"The Aurora Witch - Prologue" Open in new Window. by Lea M Carrie


Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A Prologue Is a short introductory section at the beginning of a book that provides background information or sets the stage for the main story.

This seems to be a well-written prologue that describes and introduces the characters well while giving glimpses of the storyline.

A good intriguing opening line however you might consider experimenting with making it stronger to really grab the reader at the beginning.


Lea M Carrie thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:*BigSmile* Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
80
80
Review of Lie  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Power Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again Jimminycritic I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Lie" Open in new Window. by Jimminycritic

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:An interesting four line poem that raises a question that takes this reader's curiosity.
Indeed it does appear that the devil is more interested in taking one of God's followers away than he is in taking a neutral soul. It seems to be embedded in Human Nature to want what we can't have. Maybe that is embedded in the devil's nature also. I suppose it would be more valuable or more points to capture an opponent from the opposing team.

This well worded short four line poem has certainly got this reader's mind spinning.

Jimminycritic thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
81
81
Review of Failing Forward  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Power Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again Emberly Gray I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Failing Forward" Open in new Window. by Emberly Gray

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: This poem carries a strong and consistent flow. A diamond in the rough.*GemP*
'Falling Forward' is a very creative, strong poem that chisels out a portrait of a strong, talented person finding their own way to cope with the problems that the world has put in their way. Enjoying the good times as well as making the best out of the bad times. Growing wise and stronger day by day.


Emberly Gray thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
82
82
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Power Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Emberly Gray I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Still Caught in your Shadow" Open in new Window. byEmberly Gray

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A strongly worded and very deep romance style poem focusing on a past relationship that won't seem to go away. By putting it on paper, now it can be filed away.

Indeed at times it is hard to get those relationships out of our heads so we can move on with our life. As we travel through Time we find that in no time at all… we can look back on those times and Acknowledge how we learned, even grew stronger from those past mistakes.


Emberly Gray thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
83
83
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Power Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again JCosmos I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Lightening Strikes Close County Fairs" Open in new Window. by JCosmos

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A delightful thirty line poem that seems to have met the prompt requirements well. "Lightning strikes close county fairs" a very creative storyline for this entertaining poem. I hope that you won the writer's cramp.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:I see the image of A glorious Old Country Fair where everyone from all over has come to enjoy the festivities and indulge in the contest to try to win the blue ribbons. A happy and peaceful place where everyone is enjoying themselves and there's no sign of a fire anywhere. *Fireworks1*

JCosmos thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
84
84
Review of Make Them All One  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again bobaturn I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Make Them All One" Open in new Window. by bobaturn

Clarity:A good title for this holiday tale.

Writing style:Holiday comedy drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?*Smirk* Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*Smirk*Nice structure that does make it easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*Smirk* Good dialog that is appropriate for the speaker.

My favorite line:---"That was Mandy, our teenager's idea. She dreamed it up as a way of getting revenge on her ex-boyfriend when he dumped her because he didn’t like the old hag witch costume she wore on Halloween. He wanted to see her in something more sexy, Male chauvinist pig. He got lost in the straw bale maze.”---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written, entertaining and creative short story focusing on how some people get overly carried away with holiday decorations and traditions.

bobaturn thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:*Smirk*Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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85
85
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi TeeGateM I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"The Tale of Betty Blue Shoes" Open in new Window. by TeeGateM

Clarity: A nice title for this blue shoe's tale.

Writing style: Children's folk tale drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed? Only two are listed, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader? Nicely structured, making it easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker? Good dialogue that is appropriate for its speaker.

My favorite line:---She walks through the house with a shuffle and a wobble, socks peeking out, shoes turned backward—but her confidence perfectly in place.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A nice opening that introduces Betty Blue Shoes and describes a pretty good picture of her. A well written children's tale with a great character description. A good point is made at the end...'Growing up doesn't mean getting everything right.'

An entertaining children's tale.

TeeGateM thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
86
86
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Rio'sReality I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Chapter 1 Echos Of The Street" Open in new Window. by Rio'sReality

Clarity: An interesting title that catches my attention and persuades me to read more.

Writing style: Crime Gangster drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?*BigSmile* Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*BigSmile* A nice structure that does make it easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*BigSmile* A great job with the dialogue which is appropriate for its speaker.

My favorite line:---I roll once, block one kick, swing blind and connect with somebody’s leg.
The surprise buys me two seconds.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A good opening that intrigues my curiosity. Great realistic descriptions that bring the reader into the story, right beside the main character.
A good realistic storyline that reads like a true story, helping the reader to relate. A good steady pace that makes it easy for the reader to follow.

A good ending that allows the reader to use his imagination while wanting to know more.

Rio'sReality thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:*BigSmile*Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
87
87
Review of Here it stays  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi No one I came across this work while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the article: "Here it stays " Open in new Window. by No one

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A deep work focusing on our digital footprint we leave for this world. Well written, making some very deep points that no doubt makes the reader think. However, in the long run, how long will it be till digital will be considered an ancient technology? If and when this happens, will there be any remains for the future humans to read? Will they know how to read?

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the spelling, grammar or mechanics of this interesting work.

No one thank you for sharing your work.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
88
88
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again Princess Megan Snow Rose I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Jane Austen Newsletter March 2017" Open in new Window. by Princess Megan Snow Rose

Clarity: The title describes the contents of this newsletter well.

Writing style: Fanfiction Newsletter.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed? Only two are listed, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*BigSmile* A nice structure and format that is easy for the reader.(the pink font would be a little easier to read if it were darker.)

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?Indeed.*BigSmile*

My favorite line: ---I am not sure if I would like an opera about one of Jane Austen's novels. I like opera but a Jane Austen opera, I am not so sure.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: Well written with a nice orderly layout that is easy to follow. A good Newsletter packed full of current information about Jane Austen. Great images also.

Princess Megan Snow Rose thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:*BigSmile*Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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89
89
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Charity Marie _*Heart* I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Edit Points Explained" Open in new Window. by Charity Marie _*Heart*

Clarity: A good title that explains the contents of this article well.

Writing style: How to advise and suggestions.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?*Smile*Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*Smile*Nicely structured.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*Smile*


My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: Very well written and explained so that even I can understand it. Thank you for solving the edit point mystery. In over 1900 reviews I have only run across the edit points one time that I can recall.
Well laid out in an easy to follow step by step lay out. Explained in a nice and simple way so that anyone should be able to easily follow and understand the value of this hidden treasure.

Charity Marie _*Heart* thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:*Smile*

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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90
90
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi nomlet I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"First Contact: Another World" Open in new Window. by nomlet

Clarity: A great title for the sci-fi soap opera Tale.

Writing style: Sci-fi comedy, Drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed? Only two are listed. by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader? A nice structure that does make it easier for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker? Indeed, the dialogue does seem appropriate for its speaker.

My favorite line:---"We are a highly evolved species. Sex is meaningless to us."

"Well now! That rules out boys, but ya'll sure are alien!"---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: A well written story told in a realistic tone, making it very enjoyable to read. A very entertaining and humorous Sci-Fi tale. I knew we had to have something in common with aliens.

nomlet thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:Write on!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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91
91
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Eravathi I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Allusive Echoes " Open in new Window. by Eravathi

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A twenty four line philosophical poem with a constant rhyming scheme. Focusing on our interpretations of time.

The dimension of time is a mystery that the human mind has yet to comprehend.
' A whisper weaved in space and time. '

This deep poem carries a mystic flow.


Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the spelling, grammar, or mechanics of this entertaining poem.

Eravathi thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
92
92
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi LBurks I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Remember To Always, Always Say Please" Open in new Window. by LBurks

Clarity:A good title for this childrens tale.

Writing style:Childrens educational drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?Only one given *Sad* by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader? The structure is somewhat easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?Indeed.*Smirk*
My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions:A nice opening with Dan and Noel. The first nine lines are strong with a good childrens flow.

A well written tale, however, keep in mind that children like us these days have a very short attention span.

For a children's book, I would definitely consider illustrations. More line spacing and probably a different font and font size. Keep in mind in these modern high paced times children to have a short attention span and don't expect things to be as long as they once were.

LBurks thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions: Consider the suggestions above. More line spacing, different font and font size. A good edit. Add some illustrations.

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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93
93
Review of 1969  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi again Sumojo I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "1969" Open in new Window. by Sumojo

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: 'One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.' Such a strong phrase that was imprinted on my mind a few years back in 1969 when in the 1st grade we were allowed to watch the moon landing on closed circuit TV. This work has sent this reader back in time.

1969 is a well worded and powerful 75 word free verse style fantasy poem.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: I see the image of a peaceful, enlightened race visiting our moon. When suddenly their peaceful and tranquil environment is interrupted by the noise of a loud spaceship landing on the moon with an annoying and arrogant race who think they are the only ones that exist.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the mechanics of this powerful poem that has sent this reader back in time.

Sumojo thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
94
94
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi Charity Marie -*Heart* I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"Death of a Surrender" Open in new Window. by Charity Marie -*Heart*

Clarity: A strong and interesting title.

Writing style: Fantasy, history, Drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?*Sparkle* Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*Sparkle* Nicely structured article that does make it easier for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*Sparkle* Good job with the dialogue.

My favorite line:---It was a slaughter down to the last rebel soldier. The gunfire lasted only until sunset and although many attempted to escape in the heat of the battle, most all were captured. Even with their larger numbers, many Union soldiers died or were injured along with the Confederates...”---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: History has always fascinated me, and many times in the course of events one can't help but to ask himself what if? This is a well written and very realistic description of events that could have been true under different circumstances.

I hope that you won the history contest. This well written article has got this readers mind working on history.
A creative idea and well written story.


Charity Marie -*Heart* thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:Write On!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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95
95
Review of A Clean Escape  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

Hi L.A.Saxe I came across this story while random reviewing.
I am no literary professor however I like to read and feel like my opinions relate with today's average reader.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of:"A Clean Escape" Open in new Window. byL.A.Saxe

Clarity: A good title that piques the reader's curiosity.

Writing style: Flash fiction. Comedy, Drama.

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Are all 3 genres listed?*StarStruck* Yes, by listing the Max amount of three genres your work will be available to more readers and browsers searching in that genre.

Is the structure and format easy for the reader?*StarStruck* A well structured work that is easy for the reader.

Is the dialog appropriate for the speaker?*StarStruck*Yes.

My favorite line:---In the blink of an eye, the door swung open, and Stan pounced out, coming face to face with… the cleaning trolley — That explained the jingling.---

My two cents is only one opinion. Overall impressions: An interesting opening that does hold the reader's attention and persuades him to want to read more.
A well written and creative storyline. Short yet it makes its point well. A good kind of humorous ending.

L.A.Saxe thank you for sharing this work it has been a joy to read it.

Suggestions:Write On!

WRITE ON! KEEP WRITING! GOD BLESS.

Joseph
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Review of Torn Apart  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Keaton Foster: Know My Hell! I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Torn Apart" Open in new Window. by Keaton Foster: Know My Hell!

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Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A free verse style poem loaded with emotion and focusing on the dark inner self that we all have to keep disciplined in our inner mind.
'I am
torn apart
but still standing—
not whole,
but still
mine.'

Well worded so that the reader can definitely feel the emotions that scream from this poem.


Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the grammar, spelling or mechanics of this strong poem.

Keaton Foster: Know My Hell! thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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97
97
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi Amera Jane I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Love is the most sacred of codes" Open in new Window. by Amera Jane

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Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter:A twelve line free verse style poem focusing on emotional codes and the way they make us feel.
Well worded so that the reader can easily feel the emotions. This entertaining short poem carries A delightful flow.

' Silence can be devastating.
Love is the most sacred of codes.'

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the grammar, spelling, or mechanics of this entertaining work.

Amera Jane thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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98
98
Review of Mangiare  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi again Jatog the Green I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Mangiare" Open in new Window. by Jatog the Green

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Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A very entertaining concrete form poem focusing on getting back to eating Mama's cooking. What a great focus.
A delightful poem. I am glad to see that it won Writer's Cramp. I know for a fact that writing a concrete form poem can get very tedious at times.

Artistic Voice and Imagery: I see the image of a soul returning home after a long departure. Looking so forward to that good old home cooking of Mama's again.

Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the grammar spelling or mechanics of this entertaining work.

Jatog the Green thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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99
99
Review of Bad Dream  Open in new Window.
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi again NormaJean AKA CHEER QUEEN I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "Bad Dream" Open in new Window. by NormaJean AKA CHEER QUEEN

Image #2337040 over display limit. -?-

Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: An annoying dream about everybody trying to scam you with vacations and then you wake up on a vacation. What a lovely story.
I think most people like me can relate to this story due to all the scammers always out to get you in these modern times.

A very well written, humorous short story. That is very entertaining.


NormaJean AKA CHEER QUEEN thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
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100
100
Review by Joseph Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi again Wandering Thoughts I came across this poem while random reviewing.
I hope you will find this feedback helpful.

My impressions of the poem: "We Keep On Repeating Our Past Mistakes" Open in new Window. by Wandering Thoughts

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Form, Format, Rhyme and Meter: A well written and well worded lyrics style poem focusing on politics. Politics is one of those subjects with the most strongly opinionated views. A subject most people just try to avoid unless they want an argument.

This work carries A delightful flow and definitely hits on a lot of strong points.
'This US vs THEM mentality must be set aside;'


Grammar, Spelling and Mechanics: No problems that I can find with the mechanics of this entertaining and strong work.

Wandering Thoughts thank you for sharing your poem.
Write On!

Joseph Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
"disABILITY WRITERS GROUP" Open in new Window.
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