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 |   New and Improved... but only slightly. |
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THE MANIFESTO REMIX You've been pwn'd by ☡.☠ ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| ... it's time for your SATURDAY STUMPER From the hit TV series Alf, what was Alf's real name? We are looking for the character Alf's real name. |
| ... I'm Officer McBeats and there will be no obstruction of the Funk in my jurisdiction! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLtoyXkpHCM Mmmmm, them's tasty beats. Tear the roof off this mutha sucka! You ever come on this site and see over on the Merit Badge tool bar that someone was just given an "Erotica" MB and thought to yourself, "oh my, well, we know what they write about". Snicker, snicker, snicker I spend a good deal of time on this site. More than any normal man could withstand, but I'm not normal, I'm supra-normal. And when I write a testimonial for this site, I go above and beyond the call! So here now, I present to you, the testimonial I submitted earlier tonight. I'm sure you'll see it repeated over and over on the tool bar, but for posterity, let's record it here. When I joined this site three years ago, I couldn't read, much less write. I was working as a debt collector and could barely operate a shovel. Now though I'm Sarah Palin's speech writer and I owe it all to this site! Not only that, but it cured my baldness and I no longer suffer from psoriasis! Where would I be without WdC... certainly not married to a Bavarian bikini model! SCORE! Thank you, WdC! That's quality... I think the Story Master and/or Mistress will be contacting me soon to let me know just how awesome that was. Testify to something awesome below! Be it a quality TV program or for the delicious taste of squirrel tators! |
| ... runk blizzog! Cue music - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7XTULcETGqk Ah, it must be another lonely early Thursday morning, cause I'm lit like a Branch Davidian and here talking to you. I really have elevated the art of drunk blogging to a new level... there should be a merit badge for that! New to the Remix? Wednesday night is when I attempt to play beach volleyball and get tore back like it ain't no thing. In some cultures this would be frowned upon, but not here, not with my little lumps... you. We destroyed, we massacred, we assimilated the opposing team! In fact, one could say there was no opposition as we marched through the sand like camels... with toes. HA-HA! Multiple entendres! There's a hole here in WdC... a wide, gaping hole that needs to be filled (HA-HA). There are writers, and readers and bloggers, but there's no pop-icon. That's right, this site lacks a charismatic superstar! A Jonas (cause brothers just confuse things) to be a focus for gossip and repressed sexual lustings. We need that! Let's see, who could fill that role... there's that one chick, that other guy, me... ME? Okay, but only since you suggested it. I will be the teenie-bopper icon that your tweens can look up to! I've watched "NYC Prep" and "My Sweet Sixteen", I know how its done. Just act like you're entitled to whatever you want, cause that's what kids want these days... entitlement to everything they want. Here's the cover of WdC's first "Tiger Beat" issue: ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Now that's a pop star. Beer in one hand showing I party hard. A wrist mala exhibiting my enlightenment in an Eastern religion. A Che shirt which speaks to my politics, and a trendy keffiyah scarf. Boom. And because I'm the sort of pop-star that plays from the Paris Hilton book... I even gots a sexy tape. Yeah... and it's animated. But I can only show you 8 seconds of it, cause after that it goes from like 18+ to "Get Pregnant Just By Viewing". http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lgpOdRXXu0&feature=related Man, I dunno... what's the best way for me to live this pop star life? I need suggestions below! |
| ... friends and lovers. My newest obsession? Food Party on IFC. It's like you're tripping shrooms without the shrooms. It's like your high on meth without the meth. It's like you've just made sweet, sweet love to a polar bear without the polar. It's insanity and randomnimity mixed into a steaming heap of mashed potato like goodness. Mmmmmm. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPWBMIv0Ku0&feature=related I sort of have a fame-crush on Thu Tran... she's awkward and quirky and Asian. Yeah, I said it... what are you going to do about it? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUcX9Ffhr7A&feature=related If you watch the show online, it's a cooking show, if you watch it on IFC, it's glorious insanity! I love surreality better than real-reality. Like The Science of Sleep, you ever see that movie? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUCrM5i_W3c If you haven't you should. Michel Gondry, the director, is surreal in a lighter way than say a David Lynch, who is heavy, heavy, heavy. Thu Tran is my fame crush of the day, what's yours? (And as much as I know you all were going to cry in one loud voice, Zack, I don't count) |
| ... I heard the wisdom from Limbaugh country. I was slumming around the Good Ol' Boys club on WdC yesterday and came across some interesting "right-facts". Right-facts aren't necessarily facts but when spoken in the precise, Fox way become rhetoric with Colbert's turthiness mixed in for taste. Apparently we liberals are guilty of not listening to the right, not giving them a chance to speak their minds and accusing them of being terrorists and anti-American and - wait a minute,  , this sounds familiar. This sounds like the previous eight years for Dems! The difference being of course, we have yet to resort to police state tactics like Bush. I mean no lefty wrote in the "Lone Wolf" terror clause to the Patriot Act, or asked the NYPD to agitate a political rally to a riot. In fact, this rhetoric to me sounds like Fox news re-wrote their TelePrompTers to go from accusing, to being accused. When the right has the most viewed cable news network repeating their propaganda, where the hell is the oppression? The bulk of this toribble outrage has to do with Janet Napolitano's suggestion that we ditch the word "terrorist". And I agree to a certain degree. It's become a by-word for Muslim and is losing its meaning. Just as "insurgent" blanketed Iraqis who were fighting with Al Queda in Iraq, those who were fighting tribal battles, and those who just plain wanted us the hell out of their country. It removed understanding of the situation. But see, that's the crutch of it all. The righties need their rhetoric. More than fact, more than figures, rhetoric makes politics and life easy cause there's no thought involved. So we have "east-coast establishment" which they use in place of "Jew" and "urban" which they use in place of "black", and now we need "terrorist" too. You ask a righty should we give money to the poor, and they say yes! You ask them should we have welfare, and they say no. Rhetoric in action! It came as no surprise to me that Napolitano came out and stated that some returning veterans are a risk to join Right-wing Terror organisations. She had no problem with the word "Terrorist" did she, and with that one statement this waste of skin just pissed on every man and woman who ever wore the uniform of the United States Military. Waste of skin? But here's the deal: Our service men and women, returning, have had the worst VA care ever. There was little done to help them, in particular, mentally. I worked for a security company, and the officers they hired were mostly vets. One of them went off after his wife with a rifle and handgun, one couldn't sleep at all, and one was trying to become a cop just so he could get a gun and a conceal and carry. They were all armed, they were all pissed at the US government and they all needed help. Our employer finally got them help, not Bush's government (this is 2005 and 2006) but our employer. You know what pisses me off? Not the fact that they would be more likely to join "terrorist" groups, but that they weren't being given the help they needed for their service. Call it whatever the hell you want, but it doesn't change the facts! But it's never about facts with the right, it's about the rhetoric. This country could have burned under Bush, but as long as he kept saying "9/11" and "patriotic" everyone was going to stand there smile. Here's the funny part. Apparently we liberals are guilty of generalization. Liberals hear a drawl and automatically dismiss you as being somehow "Retarded", never mind this is a generalization about Liberals. No, we do not hear a drawl and think you're "retarded", it's the stupid things you say that make us think less of you. After all, a fine president, Clinton, he had a drawl. So did Jimmy Carter, but then that's not the answer you were looking for. This torrent comes from a blog about the "Culture Wars". It's a one-sided war fought by the brainwashed O'Reily factor watchers. You talk to any left leaning person about what they're doing to fight the culture war and they laugh. O'Reily has made millions on schlepping his books around and selling them to people who feel their "way of life" is threatened. By way of life of course I mean, white, christian and John Wayne fans; three things that are in no threat of being lost. But again, it's rhetoric, and that this "culture war's" rhetoric borders on fascism should scare people more than two men holding hands on the street. It should be noted though, that the author did make another generalization just to even out the sides: Conservatives are no better. When faced with someone who uses a more studied vocabulary we scorn them as elitist who live in ivory towers. So there we go. I generalized the right too, I know, but I'm pissed! Rhetoric removes any semblance of intelligence from a debate. Need I remind everyone of Palin -v- Biden? She repeated the same phrases over and over! Oh damn! Now I'm a sexist, aren't I. I measured my soapbox... give guesses as to how tall it is below. |
| ... on the back WdC. Last month you saved Noe, this past week you saved Noa, and we still get to keep I, O, U and sometimes Y. Barump-bump Man, that whole mess in Cambridge really is opening up some dialogue about racial profiling isn't it? Yesterday my brother, a cop, and I, an outlaw revolutionary, talked about it. We disagreed on our respective rhetoric, but agreed that the CARDINALS signing Matt Holliday was awesome. These issues are tough to talk about with a cop brother who represents the "Thin Blue Line" when you're crying "Power to the People". I think there's a lack of understanding among younger whites as to the subtleties of racism in society. Especially since racism has been eradicated in pop-culture. Racism happened in the sixties and now only plagues the South where they make movies about guys named Larry who work with cable. There's little attempt to conceive what Professor Gates thought when cops show up at his house and demand he step outside and show ID. Therefore, for young cops such as my brother, I have found this video on sensitivity training for cops. It was made in that city that exemplifies racial sensitivity and how not to use your baton when stopping a riot at a Democratic political rally, Chicago. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GWsfCZnqYc&feature=player_embedded Do you know what the fastest growing social minority is in the United States? The athiest/agnostics! Hooray! Perhaps there will be less religious propaganda stuffed down my throat every day. Feeling the summer heat? Our church is prayer conditioned! Who writes this stuff? Churchies are fine by me, don't get me wrong. But when you try and preach to me uninvited, it's like you're forcing your lifestyle down my throat! Which is ironically what Churchies say about openly gay people... hypocrisy in action! You know what this is?  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a73uTAyml_c It's ten seconds of laughter or the beginning of my downfall as a respected member of society. |
| ... your SUNDAY HYPOTHETICAL Would you rather: A) Go through your whole life never knowing that the special someone you love also loves you, or, B) Go through life knowing that you both love each other but could never be together! Oooooo, think about it... think about it.... M2650 - Cuba libres for everyone! |
| ... your SATURDAY STUMPER From the epic film franchise The Toxic Avenger, what city did Toxie hail from? |
| ... is Simon "The Liberator" Bolivar's birthday. Unfortunately he couldn't be here to celebrate with us as he is preoccupied with death. It is also my mom's birthday, but she didn't liberate one country, much less five like Bolivar. So guess who I bought a card for  .I went to my school's study abroad office yesterday to get some info on applications. The work study girl there was trying to be helpful and find the forms, but when she asked "What campus were you thinking of attending?" and I replied "The cheapest one" she just stared at me. Doesn't she know what kind of economy we've got now? Doesn't she know that Bennigan's has gone under? Anyway, the cheapest ones are Bangkok and Beijing (based on living expenses and exchange rates, etc.). So them's my targets. My plan is to go to Bangkok and be trained in the mystery art of Muay Thai, then in Beijing I will be initiated into the Shaolin Temple where I will learn Gong Fu. THEN, when I come back to the US, I will beat people up with impunity and have a masters degree to boot. No longer will I be Z. Tzu but I will be Master Z (  Does anyone get it? Anyone at all?). Dude, I am soar! I've been going back to the gym regularly cause it's free for students, and yeast-erday I maxed out on the bench... that was stupid. My pecs, although freaking jail-house swole hurt. Beauty is time consuming, painful and hard to do... you women have it so easy! I'm selling out, to you. I have a mission now to raise some GPs for an important blog here on WdC. Important cause it comes to us from Israel and is a view into a region of the world most of us only know from the news (and Krav Maga if you're Special Kay  's man-property). The blog is Noa נעה 's and it's coming up in the middle of August. So what do you want? You want reviews? You want copies of those pictures Thomas won yesterday, let me know. Name your price, I work for cheap. I talk about revolutions and solidarity among peers so this is a start. Also, if you too need help with your membership, let me know, I'll sell-out for you too. Or if you have a better idea of how to get this done, let me know below, otherwise a question: Your favorite movie ever... let me know! |
| ... none of your business. Suffice to say that they received a random Merit Badge on par with "Parenting" or "Erotica". There's been this thing going on around St. Louis dealing with a missing body, boats and lightning combined. Dude and his boss go fishing, right, and the dude doesn't come back. His boss says that while the two were fishing and having a good time and what not, dude fell off the boat into the river where he was immediately struck by lightning? Hmmmm, that's fishy... The police departments here are so baffled by this they've called in experts from Cambridge, Mass who have been rounding up all the darker fish in the river for questioning ! No respect, I tell ya -Once, while in college I was profiled, yeah, the party police came and stopped me while I was at the keg. They told me I fit the "description" of a real "animal", a "party animal". They asked me what I was going to do with my keg beer and why I was in such a hurry to pour it. Then they asked me why I wasn't playing beer pong, "I thought all you guys with barb-wire tats and Foreigner T-shirts played beer-pong".  Today's Harry Potter's 20th birthday, Daniel Radcliffe that is, which must mean that today's INTERNATIONAL I COULDN'T GIVE A F  K LESS DAY. That's right I couldn't care less about Harry Potter, Twilight or women's lib. I don't even think I thought about caring for Palin, Rascal Flatts or Tickle Me Elmo. These are things that could be burned in the sun and I wouldn't bat an eye. Tell me, down yonder, what it is you could care less about. |
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