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True algorithm ia in response from the reviewed. Honed craft over 17 years. I see the good, with an eye to potential. Will never be/play authority of someone else’s words. That’s left to the master of the work. The artist has the vision; I just react/review, illuminate a fuller perspective to overcome challenges faced with those words. I see responses my reviews as affirming. *has references*
 
To see how I review, my feedback is public. Reviews can be set up through email. This page is limiting. *Smile* I accept review credits if I deserve rank. I accept merit badges as recognition, to be earned not bought…my opinion. I buy to support friends to maintain my shadowed equivalency, not pad. I have low vision, ADHD. it’s tripped me up. I dust off, get back in the game.
I'm good at...
Poetry, psychoanalysis. Ideas and notions on publishing process. I encourage writers with my reviews, look for strengths and give direction on how to make something better. I continue to correspond those who approach, when more to offer. I see what drives, use experience and the overarching mind, connect where each individual’s art derives. Hope to opine where it could take them with their craft. Like to believe, sometimes, before the writer knows themself.
Favorite Genres
nature, love, psychological, spiritual, inspirational, epiphany, emotional, drama, human interest, science, conspiracy, dystopian, fatalistic, speculative. Not cookie cutter fantasy realms or choose your adventure. Action/adventure. Unique, surprise.
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poetry, short story, essay/opinion/blog
I will not review...
I’m happy receive an email to discuss first. I set this to receive 9k. WDC gets the rest. No page here I know of to collectively or categorically see, compare reviewers for hire. That might be a worthy tool.
Public Reviews
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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Renewal is a strong theme with this poem full of hope and promise for the future. The poet sees broader vistas with the "ominous scope" toward the future. This effort reads somewhat like a New Year's resolution.

What I find interesting in this piece are the turn of some phrases that would suggest the author has been revitalized by "Vast intellectual displays and proactive responses/ Culled from vistas previously lacking." This suggests the poet has been renewed by some source that offers "sanity and a destiny of hope for me; I am now trustingly engaged like never before, eyeing greater tools." I don't know if this is some fount of knowledge or if the writer has been inspired by events, but it is a commonly understood theme.

What's lacking in this piece is something concrete like an epiphany. Is it just the fact that the calendar has turned a page to the new year or did something more relevant happen? In any case, you can feel the jubilation and joy looking forward. It is a very hopeful tomorrow.

Glaedr

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Review of The Mirror's Gaze  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is quite impressive when considering just the honesty in the tone of the voice in your poem "The Mirror's Gaze"  [E]. Right from the start I was captured by your description of the penurious mirror. I had to look up the definition and the meaning has two different answers that begs the reader to consider what the intent of the author is. The mirror reflects a vision of a person who could be considered emotionally broke but also Scroogelike, if you consider the definitions I found on the web.

Either way, it sets up the poem full of this honesty where one is taking account of "the mask i wear." You have here someone here who is running the gambit of emotions to fully realize where they are going with whatever it is in life they are wrestling with. I imagine that has to be about what one has to offer to others. It is full of the realizations that one has been a fool and has not been able to project themselves the way they know themselves to be.

I can relate to feelings of feeling misunderstood. We as writers sometimes have our shortcomings and it is difficult to convey in words what we truly feel we wish to express. This poem reflects a moment standing before the metaphorical mirror looking at themselves and who they really see but also trying to imagine what others might see. It seems to be a defining moment.

The question of trust is a big factor. This person feels that if they let their guard down they open themselves up to criticism and rejection which is difficult to handle. But it could also open the doorway to their heart and find love and respect. I think the author has hit on some key personal moments through honesty that others wish they could express as well as I've seen written here.

This was a pleasure to read and consider before lending my feedback.

Glaedr

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Review of Barren  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Your poem is full of imagery that gives me a sense that this desert metaphor can also work as purgatory. I was especially clued into this by the use of the word wasteland. This voice feels isolated and, dare I say, forsaken. The poem is emotionally the strongest when you say "Call down the heavens to splash their life upon my upturned and sorrowed face…" you can really feel this voice's need for relief.

What puts this person on this path in this wasteland is curious. The final lines suggest that the voice in this poem is destined to remain in this place. And can accept that because at least they are alive. This raises questions for me as a reader that I cannot answer without knowing the intent of this poem. I imagine that they have to pay penance for something, though I do not gather what that might be. Even the opening line is an eye-opener when you say "now I am alone -- my fears are manifested…" something has happened to put you on this course in life.

You stay consistent to your theme making this a visual work that I can appreciate. I can connect to the emotion of this voice through the visual imagery that you used to depict these scenes. It was a pleasure to read and comment.

Glaedr

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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
This poem started out so strong and by the end I could feel the anguish of the voice trying to find a foothold with this "polar opposite" other. I think the voice in this poem loses points for using phrases like "silly rabbit tricks are for kids."

It didn't seem like the poem set out to be humorous but rather show the frustration of trying to find compromise with one who has their mind made up. Your opening verse was solid, "you're strong. Sometimes stronger than me. Your brash, your contradictory."

but in the next stanza it loses its perfect rhyme scheme. In the following stanzas it started to show some heart but was searching for the right words. I think the frustration of the writer can be felt because it seems as if they've had difficulty finding a grasp on what to say.

At times like this, I just like to go back to the original concept of something I was working on. Here I think it is your opening stanza. There are parts of the poem that act as the he meat of what you want to get across. May take some time to put this back together and assemble it in a way that is cohesive.

Best wishes,

Glaedr

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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I took a look at your poem "Will always remain" to return the favor of a review from you. What I found quite pleasing as i began to read was the repeated theme in the opening stanza lines 'take me as you have,' 'touch me as you have', and 'love me as you have' showing progression in this relationship.

However, this theme changed direction in the fourth and fifth verses. It seems after the love is over, the narrator is worried about if he will ever leave and what would happen then. This is the point where I missed the celebration of the love you found and turning it into a nagging fear.

This is a personal poem as I can see and the expression is good and well. But as poetry, it needs better exposition. There are poetic devices like metaphors or imagery that can be used to stimulate the readers senses. This conversational piece does have psychological roots and gives us an insight that help develop our perception of where this relationship might be going.

I think the ending lines are most telling, "Respect me as you do/If ever this turns to fate/ I will love you always/As when we used to date." Best wishes to you and thank you once again for reviewing my work.

Glaedr

A Byways of Ink & Paper review
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Review of No Way  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem delivers line after line. I kept reading wondering if this poem of yours was ever going to lose steam, but it did not. In fact, these lines drove home to the finish with a perfect rhyme and meter to stay the course.

I don't know if this deadbeat is real or imagined, but the character described in your poem "No Way" comes to life in each developing line. The psychological profile of this person just reminds me of the direction our morality is headed in our current society.

"No driving force, to fill a need." "No fear of failure, or future sorrow." Or, "No dread, of everlasting brimstone and fire/No truth, so you become a habitual liar." You take all of these lines and develop them in a cohesive manner showing progression to the end of this person's life with how it turns out. They end up alone and miserable with no family support.

The poem's final declaration is quite harsh and blunt. If this was written about an individual person, I would hope they would get the point that "No existence, for the world to see. No reason even, for you to be."

When I read this I'm reminded of pathological people who murder, or those who just cannot grasp the concept of community and family. I don't know what's in the water these days, but messages like yours need to be well received.

Glaedr

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Review of The Elevator  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Here with your poem "The Elevator" you have something that works on a simple fundamental thought that I felt could be developed further. You have written several poems about the writing process and the epiphanies that you have. It seems all of these short odes could be brought together to make one longer and more substantial piece.

What you have at work here is basically an elevator metaphor that sometimes people will use humorously about those whose thoughts don't always make it to the top floor. And that might work to this poem's advantage as it has a whimsical nature.

You again mixed your metaphors with the second stanza leaving the elevator theme behind and going to a wheel metaphor. Perhaps you could expand it to broaden the aspect of the poem and make it more about amusement park rides. The elevator might not work in the context of this poem, if it is changed to that theme.

But just looking at this as a whole to see if there's any suggestions I can make to help you develop "The Elevator" into a more cohesive piece. I did find that the rhyme and structure of the poem worked fine. I just feel that there is so much more here that has yet to be discovered.

Good luck,

Glaedr

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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
My first thought when I read these words was that the author had an epiphany and needed to jot down what the image of clouds in the sky conveyed. For a poem that is so short, it was unfortunate that there were too many metaphors at work. I think the poet has the opportunity to separate these thoughts into separate stanzas, or find a unifying theme.

The title which is one of the metaphors is unusual, "Cotton Balls of Hay." I can envision this though I wonder if it needs to be described as bales of hay? A further metaphor in the same stanza describes them as "angels at play."

What I can see as a possible solution to these mixed metaphors is to show the evolution of the clouds as the role on by. Often when we watch them in the sky we all have different interpretations of what we see. Perhaps, you can show in your poem how these clouds keep changing before your eyes before the angels appeared.

I think the next stanza also shows promise. The use of the word 'mortal' could be developed further, using words that would show the reader the humility this voice feels witnessing God's creations.

The rhyme was a little forced using words like 'form' and 'norm'. I would play around with the words more in hopes of being inspired to create something even more polished than this.

It was a pleasure to read and comment on your poem "Cotton Balls of Hay."

Glaedr

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Review of I'm Special Too  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I pen little inspirational odes like this to myself to keep about and read at times when I need a reminder. It must have been an epiphany for you to have a moment when the words came spilling forth and had to grab pen and paper to preserve these thoughts.

What makes "I'm Special Too"  [E] appealing is we're not striving for perfect English in the opening lines to make a point --
"When I think of the talents/That others have got/And I can see/Just what I am not..."
It's almost like you are playing dumb when you obviously are not. I get like this, too. I find that I am jealous of the amazing abilities people have to construct words that I wish I had thought of.

What you have done with this poem is turn it into a reminder that if we push ourselves, we too can achieve goals. Sometimes, it takes just doing something to get a "good for you!" to motive oneself. And then, you know, that you are "special, too."

It's the power of a positive attitude that drives this poem. I'm reminded that envy doesn't have to make one feel it's time to throw in the towel and give up, but to buck up and try harder. We are reminded that we have abilities, also, if we just chose to display them. Having an audience does help, too.

Well done,
G
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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Very sharp poem with good rhyme and meter. I am ready for some football! You are right to say that this game is the greatest on earth.

I don't know what inspires to write poetry about the NFL, but I think this is something that would work for fans of the game. It speaks to them.

It is a very timely poem, as well. That second stanza has lots of opportunities to grab people with the anticipation of the upcoming conference championship games this weekend. You have a chance to spice it up a bit and replace words like 'try', 'look', and 'see' to give greater action to your words.

Some of the greatest sportswriters are poets. Although, that may be more in the past. These purveyors of sports lexicon might use words like hurl, pound, or smash. And then, there is football terminology like block, tackle, blitz, or sack. This is the place where they have gridiron, the end zone, the red zone, etc. This is a very brutal sport that can be as beautiful as poetry.

I think as a three stanza poem, this works very nicely. Like I said, your rhyme and meter flow really well. If you wanted to do an extended version, you could have even more fun. Perhaps, a Super Bowl poem is in the works?

Glaedr

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Review of Little Brother  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I like this poem with the way you play around with the words and give us this sense of a place inside your heart that can be small yet so hard to fill. It reads to me like someone's difficulty with being fully satisfied with life. It feels like you have everything you should possibly have to make you happy and yet something is missing.

This is a sweet ode to one's little brother. I know how exciting it is for parents when there is a newborn. It's even more fun for parents with a child who is excited to have a little brother or sister. That's what makes this poem even sweeter.

It did sound at times like the poem was reaching to find words to express. It kept repeating the lines about the little space which can work within a certain form or structure. But it just felt like the words were roaming around inside the poem not knowing what to do. Now you could say that that was the actual purpose because the speaker did not know how to fill that space in their heart. So I kind of made an argument for it.

It was a pleasure to read and comment.

Glaedr

A Byways of Ink & Paper review
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Review of A Moment's Trial  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
This was a nicely worded poem to read about one's journey through life and faith. You set me up in the opening for something that I don't believe was realized, but by the end it really didn't matter that you didn't answer my opening query... What did you find "strange."

You speak of all the trials and tribulations and people who have duped you in life. And you also talk about how few victories a person can have and how you shake your fist at the sky in obvious frustration. To me, this seemed like you were shaking your fist at God. But in the end you also say that you put your faith in him. That might sound a little bit contradictory, but we are all prone to asking him why life turns out the way it does. So, by putting your faith in him you feel like it helps you get through the days.

The rhyme was good, although, maybe...just a little forced. You also have a very tight meter that seems hard to work with, causing you to constrict the sound of the words. I think it would be okay to open up the poem and make it longer and perhaps you can play around more with the sounds and the rhymes.

I did enjoy some of the imagery you used as an expression including, "through jagged peaks and blasted lands." It sort of gives the reader a taste of the frustration of the person who is battling their way through life in this poem.

Glaedr

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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Very nicely said! That we should all not fear life but live it. Sometimes the unknown is the factor that causes us to be too wary or too cautious.

You hit on some key phrases that struck a chord with me in your poem "life is for living and for the living." For starters, "One who smiles in life is a king," is a good credo to live by. You know that you can affect a lot of people by just being happy and confident. It will draw people to you and there is no doubt you will have many friends.

The final lines of the poem where the most profound:

"People with vision smile and tread
any adversity in life, they do not dread
they lead life and by life be led for,
life is for the living and not the dead!"

Enough said! The poem was rough to read at times and could have been smoother. But the expression is very good and very profound.

Glaedr

A Byways of Ink & Paper review
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Review of Music to my ears.  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.0)
This poem seems to work on a much larger scale than it seems. The whole poem seems to set this up as a metaphor for this person's life and relationship with the woman.

What's missing is what happens in the moment when the tear wells up in his eye and he is caught by surprise. Is this a moment he is trying to suppress from the woman, is it embarrassing for him to show emotion? I think the reader needs to be clued into what is transpiring.

The metaphor of the music creating this emotion in the person is very relatable and a very good metaphor. The other problem that I detected with the poem is that the voice is not true throughout. He says, "totally surprised to see you staring back at me." Then, the poem finishes with him asking questions about what she was seeing. He is now speaking to the reader and not to her. Either he needs to put those questions to her in quotes or change the entire voice of the poem.

The use of the words tripled and quadrupled were too exact. This is also a chance to use some form of expression to show how these emotions were intensifying.

"Music to my ears" has an unusual form but was easy to read. And was interesting to analyze. However, it feels like the emotions are still too bottled up to relate in poetry. Sometimes, these things are just too personal to put down on paper and share with the rest of the world.

Glaedr

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Review of Angel with a Cart  
Review by Brian K Compton
Rated: E | (4.0)
You painted very detailed picture of a runaway who is convinced by someone who is homeless this was no place to be. Who to give better advice than someone who has very little money and is forced to live on the street. I found the gesture of this angel to give money to the runaway, urging her to make a phone call home, was a sweet touch.

I sensed some innocence in the narration of the poem and makes me feel as though this story is being told by the 15-year-old, only a little bit older and wiser for the experience.

Your poem reminds me that teenagers have a difficult time and perhaps through strong parenthood could have better communication to avoid circumstances like this. Physiologically, young people are going through so much and so many emotions that parents have to be as understanding as possible.

I really appreciated how you set up the story, showing us that some angel with a cart could have compassion for a young person who is misguided.

Glaedr

A Byways of Ink & Paper review
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Review of Never To Forget  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Psychologically this poem you've created intrigues me. This dream you recall in your poem is curious. You speak to the person you dream about which is unusual. Are you awake? It is unusual to speak to someone you dream about unless it is a real person in your life. It's like you're writing a poem in your sleep.

It works on the level of a dream because you start out asking the person if they remember seeing you or hearing you talk to them before you wind up embracing them and kissing them. I imagine then that the person you dream about is some sort of icon or idol. They could be somebody so special that they are not actually in your life. It winds up being a wonderful fantasy that you find yourself enjoying after you wake up. Probably causing the poet put pen to paper.

What would make me sad is to think that you're dreaming about someone who has passed and no longer a part of your life. Dreams can function by bringing someone we have lost back to us and give us some kind of comfort or fond recollections.

Analyzing a poem that allows me a to analyze someone's dream is always a fun challenge. Here you dream metaphors and then get to create the metaphors on paper. Surrealism becomes reality. That's my game!

Now it sounds like I've over analyzed what is supposed to be just a simple poem about a very pleasing dream. I feel our dreams are supposed to be pointing us in some direction (probably the subconscious), or in this case, giving the dreamer a very pleasurable experience that can be enjoyed even after you wake up.

This was very short and sweet and rhymed well and was a pleasure for me to read and comment upon.

Glaedr

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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
This is a poem full of realism, about the things parents are troubled by when they worry about the future of our children in a world that is becoming a bit unravelled.

Something that struck me is that feeling she has about are there others like me who doubt our government. That disconnect seems to come from the fear of voicing our civil dischord less it sound like disobedience not unlike Walden pond.

This intones a feeling that we all have with doubts that don't allow us to unify our voices. Was distracted by the rhyme, or lack of its consistent use. Heavy at start but did not finish.

The message about faith was strong. It raises questions about the state of our world today and the ever growing apathy that abounds and why we don't make time for issues any more. It's like we are looking for our mouthpieces, the Ralph Naders of the world to step up and fight for us.

G
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Review of Seasons of Memory  
Review by Brian K Compton
Rated: E | (4.5)
You seem so young to have such seasoned experiences and reminiscent, wistful feelings of youth. Your poem draws me in with the imagery, especially in the lines that read:

Sunkist tendrils of youthful, silken hair
dance waltzes through the cloudless, azure your sky.

Such a vivid depiction of someone childlike and I can imagine that we are looking up from the ground at them as they spin about and play to make the hair fly out so it appears as though it's in the sky.

"Bright fireflies swim in the moonlit breeze," was also a very nice touch. You capture so much of the spirit of youth that I can imagine these scenes come to life. I just can't imagine someone as young as you looking so nostalgically upon youth in such a profound way.

I could not find fault with rhyme or meter as this seems like a perfectly fine poem. A wonderful poem that gave me a unique connection with nature. It was a pleasure to read and comment.

Glaedr
~A Rising Star's M2M Review~
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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
I really appreciate what you are doing with the imagery and metaphors in this poem. Particularly, I was intrigued by the color white and the word blanched. For me, this is usually a cooking reference but I also learned that it is the process of bleaching something to a pale or white color. This was significant in the poem and helped carry the theme throughout.

My first thoughts were of the title, which sounds like someone's going to repaint a room. And in essence that is what transpires here -- metaphorically. The white chamber became the first metaphor for the author's heart. And then there's a little bit of personification of these metaphorical shadows inside the metaphorical heart. These feelings, which I associate with the shadows, are sadly blanched with the loss of hope caused by the void left by missing a loved one.

As the poem moves on much time has passed, eons is in fact used to show how long it feels. We start to reminisce just as we reach a nostalgic point in our lives. This poem suggests it has been a process of suppressing emotions from the experienced loss. This is where you use a canvas metaphor, which was very effective. To me it feels as though the artist or writer has gone through a long dry spell to finally find a muse, or something to create with color.

It seems with time all artists develop a uniquely new perspective of the past and the loss that allows this new creative spirit to begin. You also use musical metaphors to show how this new feeling captures the once emotionless heart. I also enjoyed how you use the soul as a companion for the heart that whispers it's encouragement in yet another personified yet metaphorical way.

Some people might not like all of these different poetic devices at work although I like it as a unified theme. And it works on the senses, too. It was a pleasure again to read and comment on your work.

G

A Byways of Ink & Paper review.



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Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Dear Lynda,

I really, really enjoyed this story and found it very relatable. You were very adept at putting yourself in the shoes of the young boy learning how to hunt. And I think you have a very good moral dilemma at work in this short piece of fiction.

The Aristotle quote was very illuminating and I think that you could do more to connect the reader with those words. I also like the set up showing us the scene from the middle of the story before backing up to the beginning before bringing readers back to that moment. You should remove that passage where you repeat it at the heart of the story -- jump forward past that moment when his feelings were stirred watching his dad butcher the pig. As a reader we have already stored that information in our brain and are anticipating how the moral dilemma plays out after that point. This is where you have a great opportunity to snag your readers.

Why I relate to the story is because you have written basically about my own experience as a young hunter. I know what it is like to have killed something and have regret. I like how you have gotten the meat of the story written out and now have the opportunity to develop the characters, so we can understand them a little better. The dad especially is an enigma. I think he is key to the boys maturity into manhood. Dad is the moral beacon here. And I think you need to play him off of one of these other hunters, possibly the uncle? You could show conflict better by showing that the two hunters the boy models himself after have uniquely different visions about taking game. I am just spitballing an idea. You are the author, so it is for you to decide how you want to flesh this story out.

Among the other things I wondered as I read this was how old is this boy? You don't have to tell the reader an exact age, but it might help. Or, maybe hint how young through subtle clues. When he was hanging on to his dad on the back of the ATV, I started to wonder just how young he was. And as you develop the story, think about showing some of his actions when he's anxious as opposed to just telling us about his anxiety.

I would like to see more from the scene at the gun range. I think the training to pull that trigger is also key to the story. And if we know what he's been through to get to that point where he needs to man up and pull that trigger, your readers can uniquely get inside his head as he takes aim on that pig or the deer.

Now let me relate my own experience is a hunter. It is a startling moment and quite the revelation when you do know that you killed something. I sent an arrow through a bird, and there was blood and feathers everywhere. it felt senseless and made me think about God. Watching that pig drop too it's knees is also a key moment. With your story, you have the Aristotle quote and an opportunity to connect the boy with various beliefs about hunting. Perhaps, he can develop one of his own. Perhaps, a hybrid of the other hunters beliefs.

There is so much more that I would like to offer by way of comments here, but it would probably be premature. I would like to see where you take the story next as far as developing it and giving us more meat within the lines to chew on. Pun intended. By the way, excellent title for the short story. And perhaps even more profound than the Aristotle quote.

Thank you for inviting me to visit your portfolio so that I may have the opportunity to read and comment on what you have written. This has been a pleasure for me and I hope that I will be able to offer more help in the future.

G
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Review of Ugly Ornament  
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Dear Lynda,
I can see that this item is particularly difficult for you to write about because it is deeply emotional and personal. And I think it is a fine endeavor to explore no matter how it turns out,

I'm reminded of a time when I reached an impasse with something I was writing because I stopped short of saying what I was feeling. You have an opportunity in this piece to use your voice and talk directly to her. Honestly reveal all that troubles you about the estrangement like a letter you never intend to send.

When I got past that impasse, tears filled my eyes. The blue lines on the paper ran from the droplets that made their way to those words. It comforted me. I hope the process can do the same for you.

I recommend taking out those ornaments and write like you are cataloging each one, adding what you you remember about how they came into your life or any other particular memories. Save your daughter's most precious ornaments for last. Try to remember everything about how she was back then, what made you smile.

That child is still inside of her. I hope this will help you develop this assignment.

G
A Byways of Ink & Paper reviewer


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
972
972
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
What you have here is a simple formula to winning a girl's heart with a poem that speaks to her in a wistful, nostalgic way. The lines take their time and do not force the game, the flow or the rhyme. It feels like we are out there on the back porch waiting with you for her to come home.

But the reader doesn't know why true love has been kept apart. Did life drive them in different directions and will they reunite? But the poet is so calm and assured that it will work out that it's just gonna be that easy.

I liked the use of the engaging, repeated lines, "do you remember those nights? Under the streetlight?" It takes us from the past to the present so we can savor those memories with you.

All the best,
G
A Byways of Ink & Paper review


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
973
973
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (2.5)
I took a gander at this poem because I was drawn in by the potential in its title. What I found was a poem that has eyes but does not know how to let us, the readers, see.

The poet seems to be rhyming about an upsetting incident and goes on the whole poem without letting us in on this private moment. Was it graffiti or a student and teacher caught in a compromising moment? It really has my imagination going.

But, not a tuba or flute or snare drum do I see or hear. This is an opportunity to express what happened by painting a picture in words so we can all see through your eyes and feel through your flesh what was morally wrong in Class 200288.

G
A Byways of Ink & Paper review
974
974
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
You nail the rhyme scheme in this poem full of unusual and striking visuals like umbrellas and a rain-soaked bath in the midst of a wintry downpour. I'll be honest, it is hard for this reader to put this your themes together to make sense of what this all points to. So, here's my attempt to interpret what I see and felt when consuming, "My Love Is An Umbrella."

I first thought someone was enjoying a soak in a tub of rainwater, except that was the first metaphor to describe what love was like. I get a chuckle (which I assume was intended) at the next few lines, "such gamesmanship and nature's wrath have splashed on this old fella." It seemed like someone got caught naked in the storm, but wasn't this a metaphor?

Anyway, in the next stanza, we're in slickers and galoshes while it's snowing and out pops an umbrella to fend off the storm, as you describe, "A portable, shielding encore." Now is this another metaphor, possibly explaining what encore is? Not my idea of winter wear, by the way.

The advice part comes in the third stanza, "give protection when in love." Galoshes and slickers and umbrella are all uniquely ironic metaphors for something else, but I wasn't going to there. I'm just saying these types of images are conjured up when I try to add this all up and attempt to make sense of it all and how this relates to love. And protection.

I'll tell you what, it was a fun ride. I really did enjoy trying to interpret what the author intends with this poem. Sorry if I missed the point.

G
A Byways of Ink & Paper review


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
975
975
Review by Brian K Compton
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Thank you Tim, you've opened my eyes to prose poetry today and helped me gain a better perspective of my own writing and inadvertent attempts to tackle this controversial genre.

What I like about what you have done here is present me with something as concrete in imagery as rocks in a desert. There is a practical application to this terrain unlike our own attempts to arrange stones in our backyards. This read so smoothly and effectually that I could imagine what your depiction might be like.

I appreciate the beauty of prose poetry the way you present it. There is something poetic in the way these factual words jump off the page. And as I understand, this form is supposed to be strongly metaphorical. Maybe, that's where the final lines come in about a 'mighty leg to stand on'. I think I need to learn more about prose poetry. I like this kind of form and function.

I can imagine stretching the bounds of this genre with irony, because o many times facts belie what we see with the naked eye. I will have to go back and read why T.S. Eliot was opposed to this form.

Thanks for opening these eyes,
Glaedr
A Byways of Ink & Paper review


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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