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Things that I think every mom wants thier kids to know |
| This is something that I have been wanting to do for some time. I am not sure how to put all of this together and make it worth reading. Everyone says, " My life is an open book." I'm trying to put my life into a book that might be opened. |
| I was really hoping to get started on my project by now. But, so far, I am the only one who has written the letter to my mom. I have asked my sisters and sisters-in-laws and no one has responded. I put the idea on my blog here and still no response from anyone. Guess it is because I don't want letters that bitch and moan and complain about thier mothers. I don't want letters that are degrading to mothers. Guess everyone has so much anger towards thier mothers and things that happened in the past that they have nothing nice to say about mothers! Yes, I know that is rather rude but, come on, is it that hard to write a letter about the woman that taught you practically everything you know about life, love, kids, men and the world in general. Please! I know that I am not the only one that had a momma who gave a crap. If I am, then this world has already gone to hell in a basket. As I said before, I lost my mom a year ago to a rare form of cancer. I was there for the last 3 months of her life. I would not give up those memories for any amount of money. They are some of the most precious things that I have and the most hurtful things that I have. But, they are also some of the most treasured things and I can't understand everyone's reluctance to write something good about thier mom. I just don't get it. Anyway, guess that is all for today. If I keep going, I will say something that doesn't need to be said and I don't want to go there. Hope everyone has a good day. |
| My husband is on vacation this week, so, I am not able to write as much as I would like right now. He was supposed to govisit his brother, but, that didn't happen. Guess it is a good thing because we are flat broke! Literally! I really hate when that happens. I never expect it when it does. Other than that, it is the same old, same old around here. My oldest daughter and her husband are over, for good this time. They had an arguement that got physical and almost deadly. So, she left the next day and took her girls with her. Thank God for small miracles! But, I'm done for now. Maybe I'll get to write more tomorrow, maybe not. |
| Today is not going to be a good day for me. It was exactly 1 year today that my mom passed away. My sisters and I had been there for months, taking care of her, she had terminal cancer. She chose Hospice care instead of chemo and radiation, which would have taken what life she had left and ruined it. We, all the kids, stood behind her decision and faced the shortening time with her on a daily basis. Let me tell you, that was the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire 49 years of living. I won't go into a lot of details but you never know how strong you are until you ave had to do something like that. For a long time I was unable to have milkshakes because near the end, that was all she would eat or drink. But, I have recently come to terms, sort of, and had a strawberry milkshake the other day. Guess you could say it was in her honor and it was OK that time. Next time, who knows. Say a prayer for my brothers and sisters today. They are there and I am here. They will need it more than I will because they will go to the cemetary this afternoon. If prayers aren't your thing, then maybe you could just light a candle for her or for them. It is the thought that counts and my mom loved scented candles. She burned them all the time, until she had to be put on oxygen, then she couldn't. But, that is enough for now. I'll talk about my mom some other day. I have a request, I am collecting letters from people for a project. The letters are from daughters to mothers. I have asked my daughters, my sisters and my friends for letters, so far, I only have mine. The letters should be ones filled with the mutual respect and love that daughters have for thier mothers and vice versa. I do not want letters of anger or disrespect. If you are interested in submitting a letter, please leave me a message, I will get back in touch with you. You may sign the letter with your name, your state or anonymously, but I will need a valid email or address as proof that I did not write them myself. If you would like my personal email to send them to, I will give it to you or if you prefer, you can mail them to me. I am in the process of acquiring a p.o. box for this purpose. I hope to have it by next weekend. If you know of anyone that might be interested in submitting a letter, please tell them about this project. Unfortunately, I am unable to compensate anyone for thier letters but I would be very grateful for any that are submitted. Thank you in advance and thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my little piece of the world. Sincerely, Gramma 6 |
| Well, I talked to my daughter the other day and now it looks like she won't be able to come visit for a few days or bring her daughters for a month long visit. They were supposed to stay with us for about a week, then thier other grandma, then other family members on thier dad's side and then back to this side of the family before they went back home. Needless to say, the girls are really upset about not coming, but, it can't be helped right now. Thier mom can't afford to drive here and back without someone going along and covering half of the gas. Since my son can't go along now, due to complications at work, she can't afford to come either. They were going to split the gas, both ways. It really sucks too. This weekend will be the 1 year anniversary of my mother passing away. I was looking forward to spending that time with my oldest daughter and my 2nd son. I haven't seen him in about 3 years now and that in itself is painful. I got to see my oldest daughter for a few days last year but then she went back to florida, to her husband and her girls. But, sometimes things happen for a reason, although I don't know what the reason could be, I'm sure it will be revealed eventually. Guess I'm going to stop for now. I have some thinking to do and I just don't feel like writing anymore right now. |
| Well, the brewiing arguement began last night. One of the cats knocked down one of my husband's precious cars off of the top of the big screen tv that doesn't work anymore. Basically, it is just a glorified shelf for his things. So, now the cats have to stay outside, PERIOD! I was told, in no uncertain terms that if I didn't like it, then me and the cats can just go and keep on going. He said this because I don't want to take them to a shelter or give them away. He doesn't want to keep them because he thinks that they are tearing up the house and just breaking his things. Some of my things have gotten broken too, but that doesn't matter to him. I was told that the only reason he plays the lottery is to get rid of me. Doesn't that make you feel wonderful? |
| Well, there really isn't anything new going on around the house these days. I talked to my oldest daughter the other day and they are having a really rough time. They ended up in the hole with the bank. Her husbands check was direct deposited and they are still in the hole. That really sucks too, because everyday that they owe the bank money, a fee is added and the amount gets higher.What messed them up was the holiday, I think. On top of that, her husbands baby momma wants to come visit so he can see the baby.That's major baby momma drama right there. Sure wish that I could do something to help my daughter with her dilemma. I have not been in that situation and really have no advice that is worthy to give her, except to stay calm and rational when she talks to the internet fling that caused the baby momma drama in the first place. Just to add some more excitement to the mix, her husband was diagnosed witih severe manic depression/ bi-polar disorder and he is continually threatening suicide when things don't go his way. The house that they are renting is about $1000.00 a month, then add the light bill(all electric) , phone bill, cable bill, and then groceries, then gas for the car and you can see how much they are struggling. My daughter was working, part-time and her husband has a full-time job. But, he spends money like he has a lot of it and he doesn't. He makes enough to pay the rent, buy the groceries and pay some of the bills. The little bit of money my daughter makes, covers the rest and there is a little extra left over for the kids to have a little spending money for the movies, skating etc. It would be so much easier if I had the money to buy everybody thier own house, wherever they wanted to live. I keep hoping and buying lottery tickets. I know, the possibility of winning is miniscule, but, I keep hoping and playing. Maybe one day really soon, i'll atleast get enough money to move back home. My husband is probably going to Texas in the next couple of weeks to check out the job market. I don't know if I will go with him or if he is going by himself on the bus. If he is going on the bus, then I need to reserve the ticket now, so it will be about $100 cheaper for the round trip than if he bought the ticket at the desk on the day he decided to go. As for the latest on the home front, I have a broken shock on the truck. Yes, it is BROKE! When I say broke, I mean BROKE! It isn't even connected to the part that it is supposed to be connected to and it looks like a piece is missing. My son is going to replace them this weekend. You have to replace both of them, not just the one that is broke. Hopefully, he will be able to do it today but most likely, it will be tomorrow. As for the one dog that I have left, he seems to be getting a little better. Atleast he is eating a little more and drinking a little more than he was for the first week after the momma dog died. I really don't think that I could handle losing all of the dogs so close together. But, for now, he is still here and getting special attention these days. The cats are a different story. My husband is ready to get rid of the 2 young ones. They are about a year old, give or take 3 months, and they climb on everything. They have already broken the handle off of my electric skillet because they knocked it off of the top of the fridge, 3 times. It is not repairable anymore. Now, they are starting to climb on his precious collector cars. Because they are climbing on his things and might break them, he wants to get rid of them. I don't. So, there is the brewing arguement between us. Hopefully it will not get to that point. I hate arguing! Anyway, enough for now. Till next time, BYE! |
| You know, in the bible, somewhere, it says that the first shall be last and the last shall be first. Ironically enough, that is how it is happening with the 2 boy dogs that we have had forever. The runt of the litter died first and the first born is still here, alone, since his mother died last week. Just thought that was kind of ironic, don't you think. Anyway, I'll add more on Tuesday, when I have more privacy and time. My husband will be at work and I'll be able to think. Hope everyone has a Great Holiday!!! |
| As I said in my last entry, our dog,Gizmo, passed away this past Sunday. We have one dog left and his name is Klondike. He looks like a white pomeranian, only bigger, but, not as big as a husky. When Gizmo had her one and only litter of puppies, Klondike was the first born. He looked just like the Klondike icecream bear, thus the name, Klondike. Then she had 2 more puppies, they looked just like pomeranians. Same color and everything, just a little bigger. Then she had her last puppy and he was the runt. His full name was Cry baby Bear. He was black and brown and looked just like a bear, except he was very whiney. That is how he got his name. Klondike lost his brother last year on July 5th. He had a grand mal seizure and it won this time. Last Sunday, Klondike lost his mother. So, now he is all alone in the house that he was born in about 13 years ago. He has never been alone and I am sure he is very depressed and very lonely. I don't know how to help him through this. I have been paying special attention to him, making sure that he eats and drinks water, petting him and talking to him, but it doesn't seem to be helping him very much. On top of being alone now, he is also blind. He lost his sight, due to cataracts that matured to quickly, almost 2 years ago. He has adapted very well to not having any sight, as long as we don't move the furniture around. Now that he has no one to follow in the back yard, I'm going to have to buy a tie out for him. The kind that you hang up high with another leash attached to it, so he can go outside and not get lost in the backyard. He gets turned around and then confused, then he panicks. If he panicks, he will get hurt and I don't want that to happen. Especially now. I think that if he got injured right now, he would just give up his will to live. I don't think I could handle losing another pet so soon. The first one was hard enough and the second was harder because she was the first one to be here, in this house. It is amazing how attached you get to your pets. They really do become a family member. I miss my dogs very much. |
| Well, yesterday was a very sad day indeed. My girl dog, Gizmo, died at about 10:30 in the morning. It was so very sad and I cried all day. My kids came over and we had a funeral for her in the backyard. She is buried between her cat, Rascal and her son, Bear. We lost Rascal a few years ago, from an anurism in her brain. We lost Bear last year. He had epilepsy and it was a grand mal seizure that took him away from us. As for Gizmo, she was old and had a good life with us and we loved her very much. She did not make it to the vet for the final decision of whether or not she could survive surgery. But, my daughter talked to the vet about her and the vet told her that from the symptoms that she was having and her age, our only option would have been to have her put down. But, Gizmo took that decision away from us. Guess that was her final gift of unconditional love for us. For that final gift, I say Thank you Gizmo and I'm sorry that I couldn't have saved you. I will miss you for many years to come and think of you every night before I go to bed because I will not be able to tell you, Come on Gizmo, let's go to bed. She is the only one of the dogs that was allowed to sleep in our room. Actually, it was her room before it was ours, so, I guess we were the privileged ones, since we were allowed to sleep in her room with her. It used to be my daughter's room and Gizmo slept with her. Then when she moved out, we moved into that room and shared it with Gizmo. I will miss her sleeping on my feet in the winter and by my side the rest of the time. I hope that she knows how much she was loved and how much she will be missed. LOVE YOU GIZMO!!!! |
| Today is a very dreary and overcast day. It is supposed to rain all day, all night and all day tomorrow. A day like today can put you in a very yucky mood and I am in a major funk right now. First of all, I made my husband mad. I'm not quite sure how I did that but I did. Secondly, my momma dog is not doing very well and as I said the other day, I'm having to think about taking her to the vet and have her put down. That is a very hard thing to think about. She is having female problems and the surgery is very expensive and there is no guarantee that surgery will help her at this point. She is about 17 years old and might not even survive having surgery. she is in heat right now and I am having to keep the boy dog away from her. It is her son and she won't let him anywhere near her, which makes for a very interesting day. He is outside right now but I can't keep him outside for very long because he is blind and I feel bad for having to put him out for a little while. He is in the backyard so he is safe but it is just the thought of keeping him out and he is blind. He tends to get lost in the backyard. No, it is not very big but he gets turned around and can't find his way back to the back door without help. Anyway, I guess that is enough gloom and doom for today. People can only handle so much before it affects them too and I would hate to think that I put someone in a sad mood because I was in one. |
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