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You have entered my blog. I take no responsibilty for your reaction. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** MY NEW CAR....WELL IF I HAD THE MONEY TO BUY ONE!!! Thanks Thea!!!! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| For the last week or so, every night at 7:00 sharp, I can hear the Canadian Gease honking as they fly south. They must have a watch as they are so puntual.... I also found out how smart these Canadians are. One bird will take the lead as the others fall into place forming a bird V. The leader starts the honking.....I always thought to tell other damn birds to get the hell out of the way...cause they don't have middle fingers or anything. Well it turns out that they are comunicating with each other to stay in line and together. Now when the leader gets tired (because he or she is the windbreaker for the group) it drops back and someone else takes the lead (I guess they all have their own compass?) What a great work sharing idea. I can hear them now discussing who will take lead first and who goes second. I suppose the pick shortest straw or something. Anyway, here is the cool part; If one of the birds gets sick or something and has to stop, two other birds stop too and keep them company (proves that three is not a crowd afterall!) and they stay together intil the bird gets better or dies.....what great friends! What I don't understand though is what those two do next. Do they wait for the next group of southbound gease? They surely can't fly in a V with only two of them. I don't ever remember seeing only two gease flying by, so they must wait I guess. Though, what if they are the last two gease to go south? Hmmnn, I will have to think about that one..............................Ski |
| Don't you hate it when you wake up feeling odd? Like there is something you should be doing? You know you should be aware of it but your conscious is not. Nope no idea! So what do you do about it? How do you overcome that feeling? How do you search for the answer? What if there is no answer? What if the feeling is meaningless? Just a random pile of thoughts just roaming around the brain. That is the problem.......how much junk in our head is just that ....JUNK? What is good? what is worth keeping? Should we write all these thoughts down and are they how we feel? Perhaps they are only our perception of how we feel..... Think about it, if you are feeling bad and someone does something to cheer you up....It doesn't change what you were feeling bad about........So the only thing that changed is your perception of how you feel......but you feel better right?......Odd when you think about it that way.........Yeah real ODD!!! |
I read a story today that just yanked at my heart..... It was written by pinkletink,
I find myself a little more emotional (inside) since the accident. Is it because I could have died? Or perhaps just an awakening that our time here is so short? I really don't know. My Daughter came home from Arizona .....she said she "just had to see me" to see for herself that I was OK..........The means so much to me. What is this world to us if no one cares? All my children came running...I am so glad we are close. I think back of all the times I gave up things to spend time with them.....It was like money in the bank and the interest on that money arrived last week when they all showed their love for me........ Life is so strange......we live it everyday but really never understand it..... What is it we are striving for.......things here and now or our eternal life? I think both I guess.....Things are a little tough for me physically right now, but it's funny, I am not worried.....no I am OK.....don't know why, but I am OK.................... |
| I just can't help it......Was I like this when I was a kid? Was I one of those children that wouldn't shut up and people wished would find someone else to bug? I must have been but no body talks about it now. Though my mom does mention the fact that my mouth was flapping the first time she met me and her stomache stopped making all those strange noises at the same time. I was surely on of those nerdy kids........so why haven't I got the answers yet? Why do the questions keep coming? I guess someday things will make sense to me. Sometimes I feel like I'm the little engine that could........I steadily climb the huge hill.......chugalug...alug.......I think I can..... I think I can.....My little wheels just spinning away......all out of breath but not giving up.....no not me, I can make it, I know I can! Finally, I crest the top.....Oh my god! Wow! I can see forever...The mountain peeks, their tips covered with snow, gently lapping the clouds as they pierce through them. Far off in the distance, The massiveness of the ocean that seems to spill over the edge of the horizon......... I feel wonderful, I take a couple deep breaths and bask in my new accomplishment........suddenly, as I coast over the crest I realize I am picking up speed.......Oh...Noooooo! I try applying the brakes, but I am just a little engine that could make it up the hill........no one said anything about the downhill after! Where is that book? There is no book about the little engine that could make it down the hill......is there? I yell as my speed increases and the trees melt together, Where is that boooooook?????? Isn't life strange? I made it to the bottom but am pretty sore. I find myself wondering......Why did I climb the hill? Wasn't life just fine on the other side? On this side, things are different yet still the same.........I don't want to be here but I don't want to go back..........and I am surely not ready to chug up that hill again. I wonder if there is a book about the little engine that just stayed in the valley. Perhaps I should write one. Maybe join a traveling show.....giving little kids train rides a a small circle of tracks.....I love kids......perhaps I could do that. I feel I have reached a cross road and there are no signs.....what lies on the right? Or the left? Which way am I supposed to go? I am such a little engine and the world is so big................Shouldn't there be a sign that says "little engines that did..this way?" Funny, Life was grand when I was climbing.....everyone was cheering.....they knew I was strong...they knew I could make it......where did they go? Well they must be cheering for the next little engine.....I should warn him! Shouldn't I? That seemed like years ago and now I am climbing a new hill......I know, I said I never would.......but I miss the climb..... I must follow the tracks as surely my prize is at the end...........I keep going and the hills keep coming....just as I crest, I see the next one waiting........perhaps that is what life is, A series of hills and valleys? Maybe there is no there to get to.........maybe, one day.....the little engine just can't?????? Now who will get the other rail cars to the top? Aren't I annoying? Enough with the questions already!!!! Where is the answer guy? Is there one? I surely have not seen a book about one! |
| It is Monday morning........I feel out of sorts...I don't know if it is because of the accident, the pain and discomfort, just being tired or some worldly flow of energy, But I feel different. It's funny, not different in a good or a bad way....just in a differnt way....I know, kinda strange but that is my description of it. Thank-you all who sent me kind thoughts through the last week and a half...It means so much to hear that people care........It really does! I am trying to settle into the new liquid diet and though not too bad.....I really miss eating....it is one of my favorite things! Today is my first FULL day of work, Thursday and Friday I only worked 6 hours each (1/2 day for me) We will see how I feel near the end of this day............... Well, got to go start catching up so....bye for now....Ski |
| I plan on writing a story about my experience last week. I have had a lot of people ask what happened. SO, in the mean time, here is the report I wrote for the insurance company. Some names have been changed. On 9/12/2007 @ approximately 3:15 PM there was an incident in the shop. Mechanic Ed C was working on a customer's truck. His job was to remove the boom cylinder lift pin at the boom end for inspection of the bushings, install a grease fitting and lube. At approximately 2:50 PM, he called me down to the shop to assist him in removal. We had one mechanic out at the time and was short handed. Upon my arrival, I checked out his setup and the pin. I was fine with the set up as it was done in accordance to one of our proven procedures. The cylinder is held at negative gravitational pull by the means of a jack or a forklift, depending on factors like space, and forklift availability. Then we would adjust the rod pressure in or out to free up the pin. This particular time, the truck was inside the shop and there was a job beside it so Ed chose to use the jack. We would not normally adjust the cylinder rod pressure until we tried to push the pin and to see if it was tight. The boom of the crane was left in the boom rest for support and because the cylinder is mounted at an angle, Ed fabricated a bracket to except the angle and allow him to support the cylinder squarely. He mounted the bracket and applied enough pressure to support the cylinder. It is hard to tell by eye whether we have the right amount of support until we start hammering out the pin. If everything is right, there is actually no pressure from the jack and the only safety hazard is swinging the sledge hammer. The negative gravitational pull merely means there is no pressure between the pin and the boom base. I had Ed hold the pin spacer while I swung the sledge. I hit the pin approximately 4 or 5 times and the pin moved about 3/4 of an inch. I stopped as this minimal movement indicated that either our jack was too tight, too loose or the cylinder rod needed to be adjusted in or out some. I told Ed to check his jack pressure to be sure it was right. (we normally might have to check this 3 or 4 times during removal as things will shift a little). As he removed pressure from the jack, I watched the pin. I saw no movement of the pin. At this point the fabricated bracket was not tight against the cylinder and there were no safety issues in regards to my position. My next move was to tell Ed to adjust the rod pressure in or out to free the pin up. At this point A crane operator (Brian Wood) had returned from his job and was sent to the shop to assist. As I was looking at the pin he climbed up on the deck of the truck next to me. Before I could tell Ed my choice of action, he adjusted the jack back up to support the cylinder. I noticed him activating the air valve and started to move out of the way. Suddenly I heard a noise and saw a shadow. I knew something had shifted and tried to move my head. I can only assume that too much pressure was applied to the bracket by the means of a sticking valve or the mechanic miscalculated how much pressure he was applying. The steel bracket hit me in the face then the collarbone. I landed on my side about 5 feet from where I was standing. I knew I was hit by the steel bracket and had teeth in my hand. I asked Brian how bad it was as I stood up, he said I needed to go to the hospital and gave me a hand rag to apply pressure. I climbed down off the truck bed, checked the injury in the mirror. I then went directly to the hospital. As I think this incident over in my mind, I feel I would not change our proven procedure for this particular job. We have done this so many times that we tend to work independently of sorts and make adjustments simultaneously. I think this is the root of the incident. I made a mistake by not verbalizing the fact that the mechanic should not adjust anything until I was done evaluating the situation and decide the next move. Had I done that, this incident would not have happened. I do not blame this incident on the mechanic and in normal cases, this is not an unsafe procedure. I plan on addressing this issue by visiting our "old hat" attitude in regards to simple everyday procedures and remind the personal that with lack of attention, even simple procedures can be dangerous. I will implement the procedure, that no command means no action. In simple terms this means that one person takes charge and no one does anything until they hear his command. Ski, VP Equipment maintenance and Sales. ________________________________________ |
| I am a hypocrite! That's right.....In our state yesterday, there was a big controversy about a book. This book was at the public library and the person that took it out was so overwhelmed by the content that she refused to return it. The news said it was a children's book about sexual intercourse and gay unions......it was called it's OK and had cartoon type illustrations through out. The news made a few references and said some pictures could not be shown on TV. People were upset and worried about their kids exposure to the book and I jumped right on the band wagon! I was mad inside...how could a book like this even be published? How dare they expose our young kids to this material!! Suddenly, I stepped back and looked at my self.......I did not read the book, I only knew what the news and papers wrote about it...They are well known for taking things out of context. Who was I to judge without checking things out for myself? How did I let these people make a decision for me? I feel like crap! I was swayed by hearsay.....I don't know what is in that book...I don't have the right to keep it out of the library....our nation is built on free speech.....my responsibility is to do my own research then form my own opinion. I have the choice to restrict it from the children I am in charge of...... How did I let this happen? How did I suddenly become the type of person I despise? One person does not have the right to tell others what they can and can't read......where does she think she got the power to make that decision for every one else? I am slapping myself on the back of the hand and I will check it out for myself...maybe it is a bad book....maybe not......it is up to me to form that opinion on my own!!! |
| I was thinking this morning as I got ready to go to work...... I took a shower and got dressed....didn't have to comb my hair...Nope it I just allowed it to be free....go comando if you wish.......My hair is so short now, It needs no guidance. It used to be down to my shoulders when I was (much) younger and I kept the part in the middle right up until a few years ago. I was always fixing it! Here is a list.... I don't miss; Waking up and wondering where I am! The feeling on the first day of school! Wondering where I will sleep! My mother's kool-aid frosting or her powdered/frozen milk! Waiting for the results of a test! Walking 15 miles to get to the party! Waiting in line...for anything! Changing diapers or cleaning puke off my shoulder! Wondering if we will get beer tonite! Wondering whether I will score (drugs) Wondering whether I will score (women)..didn't happen often Getting in a fight and wondering why we are fighting! Getting hit in the face by someone's fist! My grandmother's choice in school clothes! Shoveling the horse stalls! The morning after hangover! The third hangover in a row after a weekend! The scary feeling you get waiting for the results of the drugs you just consumed (good or bad). The look a cop gives you as you walk by. Blue lights in the rearview (cops lights) Remembering you have reflecters on your jacket when running through the woods.............cops have flashlights. The first joint I smoked (I actually felt my life change) Being at a party and realizing I don't know anyone there! When the State cops show up at your parents house and you are home! Passing out when you get out of bed in the morning (or afternoon) The feeling you get when you realize that you are too messed up to drive and you still have a ways to go. When the cops surround the pit party before the announce their arrival (no one gets away) Hoping I don't get caught. Hoping I don't get caught at work! Wishing I could stop the visious cycle! Wishing I was somewhere else! The three hour ride to see my father (who died before I got there) Wondering if I will find someone to love me! Going to sunday school and gooping my hair! Any funeral!! Wondering why I can't be normal! My whole life between 16 and 20 years old! Any trip to the dentist Lighting up a cigarette first thing in the morning! Smoking with a cold! The burning of strait Vodka Staying awake for two days strait! The look on my parents face when I occasionally make it home for the night! Begging for a couple bucks Being totally alone no matter where I was!!!!!!! The feeling I had when I was sitting in our van with my wife and the kids watching our house burn down. It was three days before Christmas. The feeling got when I realized that I failed as a provider when I couldn't find a place for my family to stay after the fire. I guess I could go on for a long time......tomorrow I think I will make a positive list.....that should be more fun.....this one is depressing me! |
| I went to a party this weekend. I met a 40-50ish women driving a 1940-50ish Ford truck with standard transmission and dual exhaust. She traps Beaver. Her family still lives in the same area for over 70 years. They have this big farm on a hill in the "sticks" I knew we were getting close as the building and houses were disappearing and instead miles of cow corn waved at us as we drove by. We were going to a 50th anniversary party for a former co-worker of my wife. When we arrived at the farm, the first thing I noticed was a tractor (a McCormac Farmal) parked out front on the lawn......with it a Model A Ford....On a rock beside the ford was a bronze plate with the family name on it with a little history. To the left of the house was their own family cemetery and across the street their church. This place was tranquil and amazing. Fruit trees were plastered through the lawn area and a huge pond rested out back. The house next door was another family member as well as the house down the street. It was as if we stepped back in time. This family had their heritage intertwined into their everyday life. They lived that life every day. I felt comfortable here even though the contrast from the last party we went to was polar opposite. The mean age here was 60-65. I was one of the youngsters and was one of only three that wore shorts instead of "dickies or coveralls" Even the two man band (one was a cousin) had some age. the pot smoking lead singer and fiddle player was 68 years old. Boy could he play! He played the drums, cymbals and guitar or fiddle all at the same time. The favorite drink here was icetea and water and they cooked up 124 chicken breasts beside hamburger and hot dogs.....One great big cookout. All we needed was a barn to raise! while I was sitting there, a long haired, gray bearded hippie drove by on his chopped Harley all painted up red/white/and blue American flag. My point is, that this family knew their heritage and lived it. I found myself thinking about my heritage........where was it? What was it? Our family farm has long past been torn down. The site is overgrown with trees and brush. Our history in construction has disappeared. My Grandfather once owned one of the largest gravel companies around. It is gone and none of the family is still in the business. My Grandfather, father, uncle and all but two aunts are all gone. The Once well know family name is only a whisper. We lost our history and our heritage.......How disappointing. |
| Update to entry earlier ----------- OK......Let's refrase....it is total fantasy.....not really doing anything......in the fantasy world you meet that someone special......how do you meet? What do you say? what happens next? Remember.........what secret fantasy do you have? Be creative here!!! Ski |
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But, honestly, I take the good with the bad, even when it is really bad. Emotions are a huge, huge part of who we are and sometimes holding them back doesn't allow us to truly experience life.
I don't really know what it takes to be a writer but heck, I like to do it and it seems the more I write the more I like what I write. That, I think is the most important thing about being a writer. 
