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 |  Now my story begins in nineteen-dickety-two... |
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2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me, Threatening the life it belongs to And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud And I know that you'll use them, however you want to -Breathe(2AM), Anna Nalick ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** For Daddy, the real world gets fainter and fainter every day. -Homer Simpson Homer, Please Don't Hammer 'Em ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
If we shadows have offended,/Think but this, and all is mended,/That you have but slumber'd here/While these visions did appear./And this weak and idle theme,/No more yielding but a dream... -William Shakespeare, A Midsummer's Night Dream |
| So, I found this article on CNN last night and I posted it on the Images in Ink forum. http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/conditions/10/07/creativity.depression/index.html... Can you believe, no one had any comments on it? Those not familiar with Images in Ink, it's a group that focuses on bi-polar disorder and helps support those that have it. I don' t know why I was asked to join as I don't suffer from bi-polar, but when I was asked, I thought I'd join and maybe meet some new people. *shrug* I do think I'm a bit of a depressive, though. After reading the article, no big surprise there. I just find it odd that no one had anything to say about it. Of course, maybe someone else had posted it and I didn't notice. You'd think there'd be one smart ass that would point that out. I'm not upset about it, just a little surprised no on had anything to say. *** I was feeling icky earlier this evening, but I'm feeling better now. I think I've had an extra heavy dose of reality this week and I don't care for it.  I haven't gotten any reviews done nor worked on my own writing. At least not much. I made an attempt to write the first chapter to the last book of the Chasing trilogy. I thought I'd give writing it out by hand a try again. At first it was okay, but then I wanted to make changes. But I didn't want to make those changes until I could type it out. It used to be, my handwritten stories had all sorts of things crossed out, arrows putting in all different directions, but word processing programs made life so much easier. Now, I'm reluctant to do it that way anymore. There was a time where I always wrote the first draft by hand and typed into the computer editing as I went. I'm not sure I can do that anymore. I'm sure I could if I have to, but as of yet, I don't have to.Well, there's my two cents for the day.  |
| The Library of Congress actually has this as subject heading: Triangles (Interpersonal relations)--Fiction I don't know why I find that odd. I guess because most people would just say 'love triangle'. If I'm ever lucky enough to be published, this will be one of the subject headings for some of my works... Honestly, I don't ever try to build a triangle... It just sorta happens... |
Arg. Well, Benn has his license. We still have a court date on Halloween to clear up his traffic tickets, but that shouldn't be a big deal. I just hate that it's on Halloween. Although, I guess since he has his license now, I don't have to go with.  But, today's excoriation was not without some irritation. It took us an hour and half to find the BMV. It was on Virginia Ave. but we couldn't find the street. We stopped at a bank and the lady's directions weren't very helpful. But then we stopped at rather neat little coffee house where the guy who helped us knew exactly where to go. Once we got there, Benn took a number which was thirty. They were on 82. Which meant we had to wait for it to get to 99 before cycling back to 00. Blah. We briefly had lunch with a friend while we were there and came back home. Then I dragged myself to work. No sooner do I enter then my boss's boss meets me and informs me, my boss just put in her two weeks. I wasn't in any kind of condition to hear something like that. I immediately went to Julie, who used to be my supervisor, and asked if there was anyway I could be put back in ERC. I still work in ERC, I just don't report up that chain of command anymore. It really never made much sense to put me in Access Services. The ERC people didn't want that either. I thought since my boss is leaving it maybe a good time to request the change. The weird thing was, I hadn't even been through my first ninety days when they put me in Access Services. So, my new boss had to fill out my ninety day evaluation knowing nothing of my work.  It's probably a long shot that they'll switch me back, but I hope it doesn't hurt to ask. Of course, I have considered applying for my boss's job, but I really, really don't want that. It's 6pm-3am and I would have to manage the whole library at night. I don't want that kind of responsibility. At least not at this point in my life. I'm a twilight walker anyway... I'm quite happy with second shift, thank you. Anyway, the damn side quest for hubby's license is now complete. I'm going to go to lunch and tank up in caffeine... |
| Okay, I'm going to see if I can type this without cussing... much anyway. I don't know why I should care if I have to bump up my blog to a GC rating, but I guess I do on some level. Odd given my GC novel. Benn called me and it turns out for some stupid, asinine reason we have to go to Indianapolis to get his license back. Normally, not a big deal, I guess, but the car's been making squeaking noises lately, and I'm a little concerned about driving on the freakin' interstate. We got to his parents' house fine with all the squeaking, but that was mostly country roads and rural towns. I don't particularity want to drive the freakin' car on the damn interstate. Not to mention the cost of gas to get there. This has totally soured my mood. All the stupid hoops we have to jump through just to get his license back. This is ridiculous. I want to yell and cuss and hit somebody, but I don't know who deserves the blame for this stupid shit... Well, maybe I do... but that's another rant... |
| I don't really have anything in mind to blog about at the moment. I just squandered enough time, I can't think of anything else to do before work. I think I may be getting tired of coming to campus early when Benn goes to work. It only happens twice a week, but it seems like it occurs more often than that. The reason I do it, is so I can use the gym here on campus. But 20 minutes on the treadmill may not be worth it. I've been thinking I need to add more to those workouts or just do something at home. I don't know. When I don't get breakfast on a day like today, I usually pick something up before I come to the library. That cuts into the free time I have to do something before work. I guess the lesson would be, eat breakfast before I leave. Since Benn changed his diet, I've been letting him fix breakfast. Of course when he didn't get up in time to make it this morning, he blames me for not making him get out of bed... He had no problem pushing me out of bed... *sigh* On the plus side, I lost two pounds. But that could be water loss and the like. I have been keeping a food journal, but the last few days I've been lax on it. I will say this much though, it makes you owe up to what you're eating. At least for me it does. Before I have something, I have to consider if I want to put that down in writing and admit I ate it. Weird. I don't know if it's actually stopped me much. But I'm two pounds lighter, so maybe I'm doing something right. Looking over this entry it seems like I'm sad or depressed. I'm not. I'm just a little disappointed I didn't have time to get a review in or work on my writing before work. |
| Now, I do have a stuffed up nose. It's not the worst stuffed up nose I've ever had. What in the hell do I have? An illness where I get only one symptom at a time? I have to wonder if maybe it's allergies. Benn wanted me to call in today. We still don't have his license. (We have to wait until Tuesday.) So I had to take him in which meant I had to take an early lunch again. He was trying to convince me to call in, saying it would be easier on me. I'm sick and wouldn't have to worry about taking an early lunch. It would help my boss prove a point. I mentioned that my boss didn't get her boss's old job. So the new person started about two weeks ago. My boss wanted the new person to know the importance of having someone available in case I need to call in sick on a Sunday. Since I'm a part of the night crew, most people think a night crew person should cover for me. (Even though I'm working a day shift on Sundays) But that leaves them severely understaffed on Sunday night which is one of our busier nights. Really, the night crew is part of Access Services which means anybody, night or day staff, from Access Services should cover. That's only the tip of the whole thing. But if I called in today, it may hammer the point home. But I feel like I normally do on a Sunday with a stuffed and runny nose. So I couldn't justify myself calling in. If I was sick enough to call in, I don't see how I could have taken Benn to work. If I have to call in, that means I'm too sick to drive. I suppose there could be exceptions to that. Anyway, I've started revising Chasing. First, I'm going to get caught up on all the reviews and revise that way. Then I think I'm going to print the baby out and give it a final read through and mark things as I go. I know I could do that on the computer, but I think for one of the final revisions, I need to have it down on paper. I just read somewhere today that you should probably print it out to revise. Staring at a monitor for too long makes me tired. Or so, I've been noticing lately. |
| The sore throat went away last night, but I started to get sniffles yesterday and that's still here. The weird thing is I sound like I'm pretty sick. My voice is cracking and none existent at times. But I'm not really stuffed up or anything. One time in college, I woke up and couldn't talk. I tried to, but no sound came out. I can't remember if my throat hurt or not. I went to the Health Center, which is the campus's doctor's office. Every time I went to the Health Center as a student, they would keep asking me if was pregnant throughout the exam. At one of them it annoyed me so much, I blurted "I'm a virgin, alright!". (Which was true at that time,btw) They stopped asking after that. Anyway, after they established I wasn't pregnant on this particular visit where I lost my voice, the doctor couldn't find anything wrong with my throat. I don't know if he gave me any medicine or not, but I remember looking at him like he was crazy. I could not talk. Period. My throat must of hurt, thinking back on it because I would have been more freaked otherwise. The next morning my voice came back so I have no idea what went wrong. Ever since when I've had sore throats, I don't think I get them the same way other people do. Because if someone's throat is really sore, they can't eat certain things because it hurts. But me, as long as I'm eating or drinking, my throat feels better. Like today, it sounds like my throat should hurt like hell and/or my nose is stuffed, but neither is true. Nose is a little runny, but that's it. Anyway, I didn't mean to go on about all that. Last night, we went to Benn's co-worker's house because he seemed interested in teaching us some marital arts. It's something I've always been interested in, but for whatever reason haven't had the chance to really pursue. We had a friend, who was certified in ninjutsu, and he and his brother had training sessions with us, but it wasn't a constant thing. In the end, they scheduled times when I couldn't make it.So Benn continued with them for a little while, but he hasn't heard from them in weeks. Maybe months. Benn's co-worker(Crouch) lives a good distance from us, a couple of small towns over. Crouch had a shed that he converted into a tiny little dojo. Most of the ground was covered in layers of carpet padding with carpet on top of it. There was a weight machine, punching bag, and wing chun dummy. (http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41MBPQCCMPL._SL500_AA280_.jpg) Crouch and his 14 year old son did some demos and just talked to us about what they knew and so forth. He also talked about how he trained others and it made me feel confident that this is something that will continue to happen. I hate to get all excited about something and find out that it won't pan out. Crouch said some things that match up with what our friend said about martial arts. Which makes me feel better as it proves that both parties knew what they were talking about. Crouch gave us a simple little kata thing to practice until we meet with him again. He called it Wing Chun like the dummy I mentioned earlier. It looks kinda silly when people get to doing it quickly. It almost looks like a cat fight. As usual, when I'm receiving instruction, it always crosses my mind how to incorporate what I'm learning into my fight scenes. The thought occurred to me maybe I'm not trying hard enough to write my fight scenes. I do have all this knowledge, but I'm not sure how to use it as far as writing goes. Both instructors have told us this: the basics of all fighting are same. The same jab you do with a fist can be done with sword, knife, etc. Not that once you master hand to hand you could just pick up a knife and be a master with it, you still need to practice, but it should be easier since you have the background. There's something about all that that I think I can apply to the writing aspect of it. I've stated in my fight scenes that a character takes a defensive stance. I had a reviewer that wanted to know more details about that. Problem is, I'm not sure how to make that sound interesting. Especially since in one scene the character's only doing it with his feet to prepare for a possible attack. When the fists are involved it's a little more interesting. He brought up his fists, one covering his face... blah blah blah. But the feet positioning, I'm afraid will start sounding like a instructional manual. Still, I'm thinking about finding a couple of fight scenes in my novels and playing around with them. Of course, you start throwing in supernatural beings and things may get a little more complicated... |
| I decided to change my handle to celebrate Halloween, much like the staff of The Simpsons do every year for the Tree House of Horror episodes. I'm not sure I like the choice I made, but while I thought about it, I realized it had to have an E rating. So it shot down some things like 'Seph the Impaler' or 'Seph the Vamp Slayer'. I've learned that 'kill' and 'murder' exceed the E rating so I figured something like 'impale' and 'slay' might do that too. I just thought about the Seph of Bathory, but don't know how many people would get that. Plus, that's really creepy now that I think about it. Seph-O-Lantern? I might change it to that one... It's a long month. |
| I want to be using this time doing a review or working on my writing, I just don't feel like it at the moment. I was expecting to be busier this morning. Benn's mom was going to come down and give us the court order of Benn's adoption, but when we got home last night, we found it had been sent through the mail. So as soon as we got up, we went to the Social Security Office and the court order was good enough! He'll be getting a new soc card in about two weeks. Tomorrow we'll see about getting his license. The guy at the Soc Office said he should be able to go today, but Benn needs to talk to this judge he works with to get the points against him for driving without a license before he can get a new one. So, I ended up with a lot more time on my hands than expected this morning. We went to eat at Bob Evans. I'm not sure what other Bob Evans are like, but the one here is usually patronized by older people. If college kids want breakfast or similar fare, they usually go to IHOP or Sunshine Cafe. Benn seemed to think our waitress disliked us. I don't know what we did besides being the youngest people there. We're in our 30's, it wasn't like we were up to no good at 11AM. After bringing us our drinks, she asked us if we were ready to order. I wasn't, so she left us. I'm used to servers giving me too much time to decide when I tell them I need more time. But I don't think this woman gave me five minutes. I felt pressured just to order so I got French toast. I like French toast, but I don't think that's what I really wanted. Oh, well. It was still good and I got a side of bacon and some hot tea. Last night, my throat started to hurt and it still does. So I've been guzzling tea. More so than usual. My sore throats are weird, because often drinking or eating something makes it feel better. Nothing else is wrong me thus far. I'm thinking it's my sleep machine or/and the cooler air. I finally remembered to take my jacket out this morning. I kept forgetting it the last few days. September was still pretty warm for September. Anyway, I guess I'm just really rambling for lack of anything else to do. I will have to go to work soon though. Last work day of the week! |
"Invalid Entry"  I found out that there a member on WDC using the handle Sephina too. sephinab And she just joined the Fantasy Forum.  I have thought about using my initials or a pen name as my handle. I can't decide if I really want to use a pen name or not. I think I do for Apple for lots of reasons. Perhaps when I finish telling about how Cass came to be, you'll see some of them. There's also the fact that since Apple has some risque scenes in them, it may be best to use a pen name especially if I still have to keep my current job. I thought about using Sephina as a pen name, but I don't think I want to. I would want to have a last name too and nothing seems to fit, except the original last name Sephina had as her incarnation as elven druid. Sephina Goldleaves. *sigh* So be warned, there's two of us out there now... May God have mercy on your souls... |
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