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 |  Now my story begins in nineteen-dickety-two... |
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2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me, Threatening the life it belongs to And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud And I know that you'll use them, however you want to -Breathe(2AM), Anna Nalick ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** For Daddy, the real world gets fainter and fainter every day. -Homer Simpson Homer, Please Don't Hammer 'Em ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
If we shadows have offended,/Think but this, and all is mended,/That you have but slumber'd here/While these visions did appear./And this weak and idle theme,/No more yielding but a dream... -William Shakespeare, A Midsummer's Night Dream |
| We now have the 2009 Writer's Guide for Novels and Short Fiction at the library. I'm pursuing it to find possible places to send my novel. But before I even get that far, the first part of the guide consist of articles to help your writing. One of the articles is about blogs writers should be reading. I'm going through them one by one and seeing which ones I like enough to bookmark on del.icio.us. This one author's article sold me on his: http://jakonrath.blogspot.com/2009/02/confident-or-delusional.html If anyone's interested, I could post the other blogs. |
| I woke up this morning and did my belly dancing fitness DVD for the first time in a long while. Since Benn and I both have a car now, it's harder for me to get to campus to go walk the track. I think I'll save more time if I do workouts at home. So after Benn left for work, I contemplated working on Strawberry Moon. Now, in the past, I've written a great deal for this story. Recently, I created a outline and just started re-writing it from scratch. There are a few scenes that more or less are staying in and I'll go back and refer to them sometimes, just to give me a jump start. I don't know why it helps, but it does, even if I decide everything I had written in the past is crap. A good chunk of the old story had been typed and saved in a Word file. But not all of it. And the scene I'm getting ready to tackle now, had not been typed in yet. So, I wanted to find the notebook the scene was in. I remember it being in teal ink. Weird that I remember that, but anyway, I started the search. I have three huge tupperware type tubs that have some of my old writing in it so I figured it would be in there. I had kept the tubs under the bed, then under the couch as I drag them down to the living room once before looking for old writing. But when we had our mini flood in December, Benn had put them in the closet under the stairs. They were buried under a ton of other things and I didn't feel like digging. I sat back down to attempt to write figuring I wouldn't use any of the past stuff anyway. But I couldn't start writing. I had to see what I had written before. I think at some point it becomes more about just finding it than any aid it might offer. So I dug the tubs out. It wasn't there. But I'm keeping them out and putting them back under the couch. I need to have easy access to them. So I resumed my search all over the house. I did find the find notebook, tucked away on a bookshelf upstairs. Not where I put it. Over the last few months, Benn has been rearranging things. Where the notebook was, was not a logical place for it to be. It was laying on top of books on one of the lower shelves. But I found it, damn it. It won't be bugging me for the rest of the day. However, it's left me with little time to do much before work. I still haven't eaten yet. I'm thinking Subway. I should have plenty of time to look at my old notebook while I eat though. haHA! ... Small victories... |
| This morning, I continued to leave the TV on MTV hits. It would seem that Eighties fashion is making a comeback. May God have mercy on us all... |
| For that matter, why is Forrest Whitaker and Jake Gyllenhall in the same video. I'd ask why Samuel L. Jackson is, but he's in everything. It's rap done by Jamie Fox. Here it is if you're curious: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYc875zkDxg I have a slight issue with the video opening up like a movie, but then there's no storyline to it. It turns out like every other video filled with booze and women. If you're going to get that many famous people in your video, do something cool. At the very least, show them more often in the video. I left the TV on one of the few MTV channels that still play music videos pretty much all day.MTV Hits I think it's called. So that's how the video came to my attention. And from what I've seen thus far, Brittany Spears is spending too many of her new songs telling the media she doesn't care what people say about her. I could understand one song, but at some point, move on. That's probably enough fluff for today... |
| I got a sore throat yesterday and it's still with me today. I don't think its a cold or allergies. I think it's because of my sleep apnea machine. It can cause irritation of your throat and such. I just don't get why it has since I've been using it every night. You'd think I'd be use to it. But it happens now and then. I don't really have any other symptoms related to colds and allergies. I'm not sure sore throat is the right thing to call it. As long as I have something in my mouth, my throat is fine. But when it's empty, my throat gets sore and dry and I start coughing because my throat is tingly. I get sick of throat drops real quick. I find gum works rather well, but I'm getting tired of the chewing. This time the irritation isn't as bad as it's been before. If it's like the other times, it should be gone by tomorrow. I bet those two paragraphs were thrilling.  I also found out today I have about 5 days of vacation to use before June 13. I'm not sure how or when to use them. I had a friend that used his remaining vacation days to give himself three day weekends for a month. I kinda like that idea, but I'm not sure if I want to do that or not. When you have nothing planned, it's kinda hard to pick a random time to be off. Mom's birthday is April 8th. But I doubt she's taking her birthday off. Now that I think about it, I could take Easter off. Not that my family has ever done anything for Easter but go to church and give me candy. I ain't going to church. But it may not hurt to ask if something is going to do something special either for my family or Benn's. I'm also coming up with names for one of my novels. I just need a place name and then I'll be set... |
| Well, I'm feeling better then I did last night. No surprise there really. I guess Sunday is the 'reset' for me. I can't tell you how slowly time passes on Sunday before I get off work. No amount of caffeine or other distractions work. No, I haven't cut out caffeine completely. I do try to limit my intake as that can affect anxiety. Benn briefly mentioned the possibility that if he got this job where his dad works, we could move into his sister's old place. It's on the same land that his parents live on. But it has it's own electricity and other hook ups. They probably wouldn't charge rent or if they did, I'm sure it would be a hell of a lot cheaper than what we're paying for rent now. It's in the country and I do miss things about living in the country. The only thing I wouldn't like is in the winter when country roads tend to suck. Still, the more I think about it, the more and more I like the idea of moving out there. Benn wouldn't mind being near his parents, but most of his siblings he would like to avoid. I think it might nice to live close to family. And a family that feels more family to me. I don't know if that makes sense. My in-laws have a way of just enveloping you and why some of them make me stand offish, there's a part of it that appeals to me. I'm sure my twenty some nieces and nephews could be fun. After all, if they start being brats, back to their parents they go.  But there are many things standing between that and now. Benn hasn't even heard from the job place, but it's a military thingy so maybe it'll take awhile. I would have to find a job up there too before we thought about moving. Leaving the job I have now, would be stupid unless I found something just as good or better. However, I'm beginning to think that part of my problem is that I want change for change's sake. That maybe why I'm easily frustrated by my surroundings lately. Yet, it makes little sense to turn your life upside down just because you get a little restless. Damn this practical, responsible side of me. It's just ever since I went to college, it seems like I'm changing living spaces and/or jobs every few years. I think a part of me is accustomed to that. Although, I'm not looking forward to ever moving again. I hate trying to pack things and move them. But if it would be into my sister-in-law's old place, I would be easily talked into it. But moving up north probably won't happen. Even though Benn mentioned it, I don't know how serious he was about it. And if change is my real problem, it would just be a temporary solution. Be a good finical one though. *shrug* Once again, had no clue I'd be going on about that. |
| (Looks like it's time for another rant...) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLqOwiZ8n5I I'm tired of a slow internet on my laptop especially when it's my roommate's loser boyfriend that's most likely causing it. Seriously, how much does someone need to download? I'm tired of having to worry about bills. Is it so much to freakin' ask to live in a society where most don't have to worry about how to pay their bills? I'm tired of having no friends to hang out with. I'm tired of not having a best friend. Someone I could just call and go do something with. Even if it was just grocery shopping. I'm tired of work and feeling useless and having them find out that I may just be useless. I'm tired of myself. I've been a lazy, no good freak for weeks now. That's what really bugs me. I haven't really accomplished anything writing wise. I got an outline done this past week, but it doesn't feel like it's enough. I know that I'm the only person that can fix that. That frustrates me all the more, because if I can't depend on myself, then I'm lost. I think that's enough ranting for now. |
| So, do you think if Harry Potter had been a girl or looked more like his mother, that Snape would have been nice to him... or her? |
| I'm getting tired of wearing my glasses. To me, going out in public with them is like going out without brushing my teeth or wearing my pajamas. You'd think I'd be getting used to it, but it's annoying me more everyday. I think tomorrow I should be able to wear contacts again. I might be able to do it today, but I want to make sure the excess eye goo is drying up and that the pain is completely gone. Not that I've been in constant pain, but there were times when it still hurt. Normally, putting my contacts in is the first thing I do after I wash my face in the morning. Since I've been wearing glasses, I've been going about my morning routine in the bathroom without them as I don't want to get my glasses dirty or they'd just be in the way. It made me wonder how people with bad vision used to get along before glasses were a common thing. I've thought about this before. I have a little bit of nearsightedness with astigmatism. While I can walk around the house without vision correction, I doubt I could do most jobs well. I definitely couldn't drive. So in a time before glasses, would I have been considered blind? That would mean that bigger percent of the population was blind back then. Maybe? Of course some people would probably be fine depending on how bad their eyesight was. I also wonder if impaired vision accounts for historical accounts of UFO sightings and supernatural sightings. I'm not talking about recent things like that. The history channel often does shows on ancient records of possible UFO sightings. In times where most wouldn't have access to vision correction. If your vision is all blurry, it's hard to know what you're looking at sometimes. Well, there's some of my morning thoughts.  |
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