Glass of water has so much tucked away. Stephan's palsy is known to it and not to his daughter. Certain things are just never known to anyone except to the sufferer.
The author has brought life to the gesture of drinking a glass of water. Every drop becomes precious and there is a lot that happened between the cup and the lip.
The story inspires pity and sympathy in the reader. When health is lost, nothing is within reach.
" The palsey came in waves, each tremor sloshing his precious water from his glass a..."
Both characters, no, the three characters are effectively portrayed. All naturally enacted.
It looked more like work in progress. The illicit relationship is main issue that caused the murder.
How did the detective got in there? Who appointed him? How does he conclude that their marriage is going to be short-lived? was he there at the time of murder?
You took the story very well till the man was questioned by the coroner. After that it went a little off beat.
A dog was mentioned at the beginning. It could give a clue as to who hit Pat?
How and why did the killer enter Pat's house? What is responsible for her marital discord?
The man- what is his job? How did they marry if they didn't get along?
Language is fine and you could liven up the style a little more.
You are right. Many institutions have this malady. They should live broadly, I mean they should share their life with all the students coming from various backgrounds. Only then as you feel there is scope to widen our vision and improve the quality of life.
" I choose not to live in one of these living learning communities when I go to college because it hinders my ability to meet diverse people with different viewpoints."
Once you start living in communities it is difficult to come out of the trap.
What I like about the story is the way in which the author took us through various events. Myra's birthday, William's visit to the gold shop, his thoughts about the pricey articles on the display, the clerk's attitude, then his preference for the sale pieces and then his return to Myra.
Other than the supernatural happening at the end of the story, it is evident that the siblings are faithful to each other and they share the thick and thin of life.
I wonder what causes Myra to transform into a mythical being. I guess it is the blue sapphire that her brother gifted to her.
Shaped verse pays tribute all the guiding lights like parents, teacher, grandparents, coaches and several others. This poem shaped like light expresses the poet's admiration and gratitude to all those who helped him shape his sensitivity and a mind to decide on what to do in his own life.
"There’s so many I look up
to, so many footsteps I want to chase,
and chase them I will."
Imagery shows those important people in the poet's life in whom he strongly believes.
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Beginning with Hemingway's words on being dull and blunt,you played on different things with those words. Finally, you zeroed on becoming dull living in California. Does "drive to live successfully" has anything to do with the place or people or anything else? I am not sure.
Egon is worth falling in love albeit platonically. Hasn't Harold Ramis said "How one handles success or failure is determined by their early childhood." I am sure it appeals to those who loved his portrayals.
Your opinions and influence on self by them is interesting.
I see the deep impact of the remark made by one of them on you. ""You're a good soul." " Indeed time and mood also contribute to come under the spell of such words.
I utterly like your writing aim " When I write, it is vital that I represent humanity honestly."
Those who do that are some of the best writers.
Everything you said in this article appeals to me.
The sea is seen from a human angle. All the human emotions are applied to the old mother sea. She is hyper, social, angry and passionate, loving, beautiful. The heaving, ever dynamic and active sea is an enigma. What moves it? Does it ever stay motionless? Questions remain unanswered. Among all the other elements that stop and start, the sea alone is unique. There is no change in its attitude from the beginning of creation.
The poet has rightly evaluated the qualities of the sea. An awesome spectacle any time of the day or night.
This poem is well structured with three lines in each of the four stanzas. The vast sea is fitted in there aptly and attractively.
The rhythm brings the movement of the sea to my mind.
Imagery deals with the picture of the sea, which the poet paints well.
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This is a child's experience on the first day of starting school. Kids are generally scared on the first of attending school. I am surprised that Bethany went to school all by herself. Usually, either of the parents or both accompany the kid. That apart, Bethany appears to be a nice kid and quite confident.
The way her teacher and classmates treated her is like a dream. No tears, no crying. That is really impressive.
Making friends comes easy for children. Look at the charming way you have portrayed the two kids talking and enjoying themselves at school.
"cold Virginia" comes alive in the above descriptive prose. The winter night and the full moon make a potent combination of nature to inspire awe and wonder in the onlooker.
Animals doze by the log fire, but man's mind is alert and awake at that hour of winter silence.
Prose is well written, description ignites interest in the reader, albeit another winter night.
"The Wolf Moon lighting up the Maury its banks now white with ice, returning the full moon’s glare,.."
Cold apart, the spectacle of a river laced with ice, which spreads with the advancing winter and a moon shining above is alluring, like a desert with rolling white sands.
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You have explored the delights of a summer day. Summer, as I understand from your poem is a valuable season because it grants you the freedom to be outdoors from dawn to dusk.
The activities you have mentioned are attractive and worth going after. I can see your love for summer is endless.
"Simple truths of a faithful friend,
you come but once a year."
Imagery appeals to senses, especially, eye and the mind. I can see you going places and enjoying yourself.
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This is an entertaining poem no doubt. Yet, I can feel the tension you must have undergone when you found that you lost the keys. You have shown your anxiety in well chosen words that paint the picture of you searching frantically for the lost keys. I appreciate the way you have brought in the necessary imagery.
" I searched all the rows and I started to panic,
couldn't find my keys and got quite frantic."
Rhyming poem has fetching line endings that bring forth the mind and mood of the owner of the keys.
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This spring poem is truly delightful and its tribute to nature is inspiring. I feel when nature awakes, man too awakes. He/she is filled with a renewed enthusiasm to live better.
The above poem excels in painting a portrait of spring, the most loved season of all. Mankind wakes up from winter discomfort and dormant senses.
It is a charming season with pictures of newfound activity in nature.
" Bouncing bluebells
greet a symphony of bumblebees,"
I feel as though I am listening to two voices, one is that of butterfly and the other a human. Butterflies are free rambling things. They need not plead with anyone for their liberty. So I conclude that it must be a small girl or a boy made to work in a household.
The pleading voice is moving enough. Hiding in or behind the flower bush, the person begs for freedom from duties, which may be unfairly levied on him/her.
The cinquain is structured on the prescribed syllable count. Word choices and length are thoughtfully done.
Very fetching analysis of souls combined. This happens only with those who love one another sincerely and for all times, good or bad. They are ready to sacrifice anything of their own. Everything is shared. Their hearts beat in unison and people recognize their quality of inseparability. They are well compared to sugar and water, two separate bodies but they lose their identity in merging. No ego, no pride.
My favorite lines:
"They always find a way to tangle again.
longing for one another."
Imagery appeals to eye and mind.
The picture of perfect harmony well versified.
A beautiful love song.
It has visual and aural imagery and touching word choices.
It makes a melodic song with a gentle guitar playing the chords.
The lyric is a tribute to Toressa with whom the writer is forever in love. His expression of love is vocal and delicate. The song brings the picture of Toressa to the reader's mind.
"I close my eyes and hear your sighs
As whispers from the leaves"
Expression is natural and spontaneous.
Imagery shows aspects the lover and the beloved very clearly.
a lovely story. Family is such a great entity. A person is truly blessed if he has a family of his own with mom, dad and siblings.
This story tells me how much the father and son miss each other ever since they separated. The reason for the son to move away is not clear. It could just be that grown up kids move away to have more freedom and make their own lives as they wish.
The party, the atmosphere is shown well. It looked pretty natural for the father to come and sit among the youngsters listening to their songs and chatter. In a way he partied with them. I also notice that the son has no problem having his dad with him and his friends. He is neither embarrassed nor shown any dislike. I like his character very much.
It is a nice story with suitable dialog and setting.
The tough task of shifting from one panorama to another is not a joke. It takes a lot of time to consider and ponder the things that matter. Finding a footing in another place is both an adventure and thing of apprehension. yet, one should move on if moving is what matters.
I like this poem for its structure that reflects the poet's hesitation and doubt in the decision he/she made.
Long and short lines that show the mood and matter.
"Empty, and unknown,
it calls to me."
Seeking help is shown in a telling image too. We all need it in times of need.
Touching story. Although children are involved, it is an issue about the adult world. The differences in caste and color still affect the races and it thus became a racial issue. Shame on the civilized world.
In the beginning there was equality and man had no barriers of separation.
This story also shows us the innocence of children who are untouched by the differences that separate mane from man. It highlights the reasons why we fight with each other even today.
It is telling tale. I like the way the author focuses on the main point through what appears like a children's story.
Hello Lilly
You could be right. With needful sleep things come into perspective. I have had those days.
Reflections on self and others are well voiced. You have self-examined and found it could be just misunderstanding or making too much of what you went through.
"What if I’m overreacting, and just need to calm down, maybe get more sleep."
You are right.
"But what if I really am imagining things the way you would say to me if you read this?"
We need to be in good health to judge anything.
I like this ponder because you have doubted others yet you have the courage to admit you could be wrong.
I don't know if it is fantasy, but it certainly strikes me as utter, helpless romantic passion. Just the phone message in the form of a poem is enough to light gentle desire that slowly builds itself into engulfing, consuming fire.
Free style poem that records the poet's ultimate imagination and makes his love materialize in his heart and mind.
Heartbeat! why don't you slow down, a long lost lyric comes to my mind.
Imagery is fine and so is the choice words and the beat that seems to represent the the very heartbeat of the poet.
A nice read. Flows well.
Write on!
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