You really know how to bring a person to the brink of
tears. This piece is running over with emotion, I am not complaining! just filled with tears. I love your writing and I hope you'll never stop. You've spoken for all the lost children in the world, children that deserve so much more. Thank you for sharing this piece with us.
Sincerely
M Duci
Hi Sowe,
What an amazing story and told so very well. Wouldn't it be wonderful if life could really be this way at least for a little while? I loved your story of course,
but I think you might want to put each character on it's own line. Maybe change sibblings, now and then to
sister and brother. Sibblings, become's a little redundant after awhile. This would make a very nice series and children and adults alike will like it. I think you have put the rating to high, 13+ should work for this one. No bad or foul words could I find. Keep
writing.
Sincerely
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I think everyone has a little Jeanette inside of them. I enjoyed 'For Jeanette' so very much. You, let the imagination take a little trip in Dorothy's land, and
let me imagine the glass slippers and the magic clicking of the heels. I could see it all so clearly, at rainbows end. Thank you for sharing this lovely piece on growing not older, but wiser. Returning your GPS with this review.
Sincerely
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What a beautiful, haunting, tail of love you have
spun here. You, have a wonderful way of sucking
a person right into your story and keeping them
a willing prisoner until the end. Oh! my, I have so
many favorite lines I don't know which one I like
the best but this one I just love, Love, 'I'll be
your rock, your truth, your trust, but never your
doormat. Don't walk over me, I won't step on you.'
Such image showing, such rhythm.
Thank you for sharing
Hello Tara,
And Welcome to Writing.Com. This is a very love filled and tearfull piece. Yes, I think heaven must be filled
with our angel's. For a young woman of only sixteen
you have such a wonderful gift for expressing your feelings and putting them down in writing. Please continue to write, express, and excell. You've made a wonderful choice in coming to the WDC, and we are here to help with all your WDC needs.
Sincerely
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I love your poem, but I really like your last stanza, and these famous lines will stand out in my mind for a very long time.
'I'm the Marco Polo of your flesh, the columbus of your nerves.' I can tell she means the whole world to
you. I think it is strong, and keep writing. Welcome to the WDC.
Sincerely
M Duci
Dear Mike,
When, I was in my early years...I wrote something
a bit like your story ending. I let menbers of my
family read it just to get there facial expressions.
Now, I felt like they did. I could not stop laughing.
You are so talented, and I love your style.
Thank you for making my day. Even today, people ask,
what did I do with that story I wrote more than 30 years ago. So, like mine your's will stay the course.
Keep writing.
M Duci
What a lovely piece of work. Fine job in discribing
your homeland. I am a travel agent and tour director, to Italy, and Europe. I have sent many clients to visit Zambia's Victoria Falls, but have never had the chance to see it for myself. But your discription makes me want to catch the very next plane to Zambia, I will put that on my list of places to go.
Thank you very much for such an enjoyable read.
M Duci
Thank you ScaryMaster, your tips have been very helpful and I will certainly put them to good use.
Like you say; "your family can read them anytime", so,
I'll send them to my newsgroup and other friends.
I'll also post it on every e-mail I send out.
Thanks again
M Duci
I respect your writting. This was a very good piece.
Keep up the good work. I'd love to come back and read
more. So, write, write, write. I have written a poem
that match's your story very much. It's about someone
I love so completely, and with all my heart, she live's in another country, and I live in the US. But we see each other about every 8 0r 9 months when I take small groups to Italy.
Mar Duci
I followed you down that road tonight... and stopped along with you when you picked up that Fallen Hero. Tears came into my eyes, as it reminded me of another fallen hero two thousand years ago... on another road, not unlike that one. He had been beaten, and tattered, and filled with many holes also. But just as you lifted that torn and tattered flag, and took him home with you! someone lifted and carried that long ago hero up and took him home too. Thank you for such a sweet story. I plan to come back soon and read all your works. Keep on writing, and Good luck.
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