%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |  Breaking the laws of blogging, one entry at a time. |
|
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Wanted: For repeated blog faux pas, including, but not limited to: Obsessive ranting - guilty on 92 counts. Repeatedly beating a dead horse - guilty on 17 counts. Unnecessary use of curse words - guilty on 142 counts. Boring daily recounts - guilty on 45 counts. Pointless entries - guilty on 214 counts. Contradictory statements - guilty on 72 counts. Recounting toilet actions - guilty on 15 counts. Overdramatization of insignificant things - guilty on 152 counts. Overreacting to meaningless gestures - guilty on 22 counts. Unnecessary temper tantrums - guilty on 75 counts. Cruelty towards animals, superiors, peers, and inferiors - guilty on 146 counts. Repeated bad grammar, spelling, and opinionations - guilty on 214 counts. Suspect is considered armed and dangerous. Do not confront directly, instead call the authorities and slowly back away. Do not provoke suspect, as she is easy to agitate. The best action to take is to smile and nod. Any other response could lead suspect to rant and rave for days without ceasing. REWARD OFFERED FOR CAPTURE Dead or alive. Offending evidence: ![Merit Badge in Journaling
[Click For More Info]
Given for penning the favorite response entry in the Follow the Leader contest with "Come Again?"](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/type-Journaling-2180.gif) (Exhibit A) ![Merit Badge in Variety
[Click For More Info]
Because I never knew what to expect from your Follow the Leader entries, but I'm oh so glad you played!](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/general-Variety-2500.gif) (Exhibit B) (Exhibit C) ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
"Invalid Entry"  I'm fighting a war of my own, although I would call in stress, instead of terror. I'm trying to get out of this house so I can stop going stir crazy. I'm trying to find something that I would love to do, rather than do it because it's a paycheck. I'm trying to find a way to balance home and work. I'm trying to find a way to be me without neglecting my house, my son, and my other responsibilities. Things keep going wrong this week. The funny thing is that I told Jason on Saturday that I felt like our luck was going to be taking a turn. At the time, if I had known that it was going to take the turn it has, I wouldn't have been so excited. If one thing can go right this week, just one thing, then I can withdraw the troops. Written for "Invalid Item" . |
| Leading entry: "Invalid Entry" And this one time, at band camp... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I played an instrument. Your job is to figure out which one I played and leave the answer as a comment. Written for "Invalid Item" |
| "Invalid Entry" I think I've posted something similar to this before. On one of those days when I'm feeling run down and too tired to deal with life. If I were to post a wanted ad today, it would probably read: Wanted: For Kalamazoo Public Schools to call me and tell me I got the job, even though I don't have much Linux experience and I've only reimaged a computer that had Novell Client on it, versus uninstalling and reinstalling it. -or- Wanted: A job that I am perfect for that is just as perfect for me. Non-contract. Paid holidays, vacation, and sick time. Weekends off. First shift. Salary negotiable. A plus if your name is Melissa Williams. Written for "Invalid Item" . |
| Leading entry: "Invalid Entry" I played the Wife of Bath in a play in high school. The play was Canterbury Tales, of course. We acted out several of his stories in a general raunchy manner. As raunchy as you can get in high school without offending parents, at least. I played several other parts throughout the play, as well, but my favorite part was when I played the Wife. My costume was a purple dress, bright red tights, and this riduculous hat that I wish I could have kept after the play was over. It was floppy and flippy and many times during performance fell in my face. I was boisterous and borderline obnoxious and incredibly flambouyant as the Wife, but that's how I think Chaucer imagined her. We took Canterbury Tales to competition that year because we were so proud of how well we thought we'd interpreted it. It was my first year playing what was considered a major role and I was pretty nervous. We had a lot of fun. I won an award for versatility in acting (like I said, I'd played a lot of parts - like 12 different roles). The rest of our troupe didn't fare as well, though. We got a 3 for the overall performance. The judges said our audience was too young to "get" Canterbury Tales. I never left a competition so pissed off. At 16, I "got" Canterbury Tales, so why couldn't a room full of parents "get" it? It was out of the ordinary, though, and the judges always hated the troupes that tried to do anything against the grain. The years following Canterbury Tales we did better because we made "normal" choices. Written for "Invalid Item" . |
| Leading entry: "Invalid Entry" My fairytale is, and always has been, fractured. There's always some hitch that keeps things from going 100% according to plan. The ending may be happy, eventually, but there's always something that fouls the mood. The glass wouldn't be half empty if motherfuckers could stop sipping from it. Written for "Invalid Item" . |
| Notre Dame football + White Russians = Woooooooooooohoooooooooooo!!! |
| I just listed more stuff on eBay. http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQfgtpZ1QQfrppZ25QQsassZsmylingyrl I also posted some photos on my Livejournal because it was feeling lonely. http://melissa_w.livejournal.com Whatever. I have to go clean the bathroom now. |
| Leading entry: "Invalid Entry" Oh, for God's sake. At the risk of sounding bitchy, I hate prompts like this. If I want to write poetry, I don't usually do it in my journal. I have a poetry folder for that. Not that I'm complaining that the leading entry sucked. Because it was a very good poem. Impressive, even. And it belongs in the author's portfolio so people can read, rate, and review it. I don't put that much thought into my blog entries. In fact, if I have to plan a blog entry, it doesn't get written. It's too restrictive for me to do something like that. I guess that's why I gave myself a "D" in blogging. If Luke Skywalker met Gilgamesh, it's hard saying who'd win. Gilgamesh was supposed to be one badass motherfucker, but ol' Luke has the advantage of a light saber. Luke could chop Gilgamesh's head off, slicing through it like butter. Luke did, afterall, beat his own father, who was one badass in his own right. Then again, Luke played kissyface with his twin sister, while Gilgamesh had a goddess knocking down his door. Granted, he lived through her revenge. But Luke Skywalker would still kick his ass. Written for "Invalid Item" . |
| Apparently, based upon my "report card," I wrote the best newsletter this week. Only one thing that wasn't an A, and that's because I'm not changing my newsletter intros to suit someone else's tastes. I didn't know, when I joined Writing.Com, that I was subject to be graded like I was still in high school or college. Regardless of my grade, I still think the whole idea of giving "report cards" to newsletters, or to anything, for that matter, is ridiculous. Although... if this were a report card on my entire existance at Writing.Com, I'd be lucky to be passing. Plays well with others ... F Considerate of others' feelings ... F Keeping secrets ... B- Gossping ... A+ Reviewing ... D- General site participation ... C+ Newsletter editing ... A Moderating ... C Writing ... D Blogging ... D Reading ... D- Melissa is fashionably late!  does not play well with others. She is generally selfish and refuses to share toys or listen to the ideas of other Writing.Com members. If she tries to be nice, it generally doesn't come across as sincere. She does seem to be in everyone elses' business quite often, and is frequently reminded to stay in her seat and leave others alone to do their work.Frequently does not turn homework in on time, if at all. But, she did keep Mariposa 's birthday present a secret, so maybe she's improving in some areas from last semester. |
| Mariposa turns 27 (or, 25 + 2) today! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear butterfly, Happy birthday to you! Send her a cNote. One with butterflies. Like I have in my cNote collection. "Invalid Item" . Not that I'm trying to get your GPs. All of them go to "RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group" anyway.Back to the birthday girl, though. I hope she has a wonderful day, even though she has to work. I hope that she really likes what Ernie got her, because I helped him pick it out. I hope that she really likes what I got her, but she's going to have to check her email to find out what it is. I hope that everybody makes her feel as special as she really is. Happy birthday, girl!  |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
Whatever you do, hang in there, he'll be sleeping like a big boy in no time!