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2,325 Public Reviews Given
2,325 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I try to be honest and positive. My Christian faith is an important background factor. I hate rating low but have a system that determines how I grade.
 
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My Philosophy of Rating and Reviewing  (E)
How do I assess people's work when reviewing?
#2259390 by LightinMind
I'm good at...
More interested in the content of what you write than the style. Theological, political, historical, scientific, or experiential, or indeed anything that paints a vision of the future. A good grammar checker will tell you about spelling and commas.
Favorite Genres
Not entirely sure as I like most stuff. I prefer something with a soul rather than purely secular. But I like Sci-Fi, anything Christian, and also 'What-if' type speculations with plausible plots.
Least Favorite Genres
Anything that fails to look for a way out of the darkness. You can be dark, just don't wallow in it. Generally, I try to steer clear of Fantasy, and most Dark or Horror stories just make me laugh or grimace due to their ignorance of the dark side.
Favorite Item Types
I have really liked some of the heartwarming dramas I have read here particularly personal stories. Thought-provoking poems or stories are cool also though I am no expert on poetical forms.
Least Favorite Item Types
Anything that is just an affirmation of the dark side. I hate empty words. I always look for human intelligence. I try and avoid Fantasy and Horror where there is no metaphorical resonance or connection with real-world truth.
I will not review...
I mainly review at random and just see what grabs my attention. I will usually skip stuff I do not like unless it gets me riled or if it is interesting for other reasons.
Public Reviews
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1276
Review of Vampire Breath  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Received this by random review, like some stalking fiend in the shadows *Wink*

I do not like Vampire stories generally cause, let's face it, outside the bat world, they do not really exist and they are quite unpleasant characters to engage with.

Your Vampire, described so powerfully, fits the deadly, dark and dangerous profile very well, building the sense of menace and of doom associated with this hunter of humanity.

The poem was well constructed , and I liked your choice of words and the descriptive power they engendered. Was not sure why a Christians response, to being bitten by a vampire, would be to show him love, might have considered a stake through the heart a better answer, but maybe I still have much to learn on my own walk with Christ.
1277
1277
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (4.5)
This came up via Random review and I found it an inspiring and heart warming poem. This one was from some time ago but hope to find more later from you.

I agree with the message and sentiments of this wonderful poem. I was not sure why you had a "-" after sorrows.
1278
1278
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi this came up when I clicked Random Review. Obviously this year the theme of job loss and the momentous changes going on in our world today make this poem eminently topical.

Your poem was thought inspiring. My job experience has always been of continual change, with new exams every year. It is a painful process and so much easier to cling to old and comfortable realities. But if anything the world is getting faster and faster. We would all love just to close our eyes a moment till things calm down but when we reopen them we see a different place. Your poem expressed the reality of many peoples experience of the modern workspace very well. I have found that values and concepts do not change as fast as the more superficial mission statements and practices that we learn and relearn in a company. We only learn to doubt if we focused on the sensual experience of a culture lost rather than what it really stood for at the religious level.

I liked your writing style, thought it was professional structured and composed. Thanks.
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1279
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Was clicking Random review when your page came up and captivated me.

The story is of a batch of eight genetically engineered ( or was there a bit of magic thrown in as well) children, woven together from 8 different races. 2 of them die in infancy, but the Firstborn gets to meet the physical donors (parents) of his rather unique physiology. The mysterious doctor, seems to belong to another Master Race, that has enslaved or dominates all the others, to the point that he can experiment on them. He has only robots for servants.

In an age obsessed with identity narratives, this one has to take the prize, as what could be harder than combining: uni sexual with gender specific; magical with a diverse range of the material; 8 different racial identities formed in extra planetary situations and cultures; without a mother and with a distant father figure who effectively built you in a lab for an undisclosed purpose; and with no discernible moral framework or religion to guide you.

It seems from the footnotes the author has not yet completed this work and it did read a little like a list, albeit a very interesting one. Though he did save the most interesting parent, the Ixi, for last as I was starting to worry at that point that there might be more.

Such a narrative with such a complex ancestry matrix would require a lot more narrative to unpack. The mysteries relating to the doctor, the Empire of the Greonteo, the histories of the various slave races, how this composite creature could survive, reproduce and indeed thrive in such a universe remain unresolved. The author has given himself no boundaries so the possibilities are infinite.
1280
1280
Review of Crowd  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (5.0)
I received this via random review and am reviewing it because it was well written.

The story is about an amusing moment from the pre-covid19 days of crowded streets. When the simple act of tying ones shoelace in the middle of the people highways of a city could cause backups all the way down the street.

Stylistically this is perfect, the hook is there in the opening line with the what's going on mystery vibe. The punchline is a simple and relatable tale told by a sarcastic teenager about her dad. Loved it.
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1281
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
These are intellectually dense thoughts and the line of argument can be difficult to follow for us lesser mortals. The author has some presuppositions such as the medieval church was bad and traditional constructions are generally deconstructed into new complex and post modern forms that lack familiar patterning. He deconstructs everybody so trying to work out which side he is on is probably futile. Heaven is referred to by reference to the the Divine Joker but there is a much richer list of names for the Dark Lord and his minions and maybe he is a little too enamored by the dark side in fact. Woodrow Wilson was a racist but understanding that in its context makes the mere saying of it too complicated to inspire actions like toppling statues of the guy. Martin Luther King was a giant but his "Free at Last" liberation of blacks was apparently a removal of boundaries and a sabotaging of the nature of the freedoms they had craved for centuries. The list goes on and I find myself out of love with the idea of post modernism and whether or not the church has to interact with its realities at all in order to escape some Satanic secularized materialistic plan for our general dehumanization and soul sucking demise. After all Islam , as the author mentioned, seems to operate well enough by just parading its doctrinal and legal certainties in a morally relativistic world. Maybe the world is in fact much simpler than that. Racism bad! Greedy bad! Love good! God and Jesus worthy of worship! Satan a little pompous, full of himself and trying to grind us down by sheer volume of verbiage.
1282
1282
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
This flash fiction popped up on my radar via random review. I do not normally like Vampire stories but this one read well.

So you have Lily who has been around long enough to remember the King of France and who has had her share of mishaps falling in a Glacier and being frozen in that for a while for instance. She is conducting a tour through a meat freezer. The story leads to the meeting with the old lady who is a lot more familiar with Lilys long life than she is with that of the old ladies. The purpose of the meeting is left hanging.

There is little to fault in the text which is engaging and well constructed.

Referentially I am not sure if all these people are Vampires isn't garlic meant to ward them off and have no idea why Vampires would be shown around dead animals frozen in a freezer or is this a trap for humans. That might need clarifying. The story is intriguing and the unanswered questions about the old lady and the purpose of their meeting captivating.
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1283
Review of Morning Aubade  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (5.0)
I received this by random review and got hooked after the first stanza.

Stylistically perfect rhyming structure combined with quality descriptions that activate the senses and transport us to this dawn scene. Absolutely loved it!
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1284
Review of Family Reunion  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi I received this by random review and it evoked memories of similar family gatherings.

The scene described is of a loved matriarch with her 5 daughters and 5 sons gathered around her and a rather splendid oak and then favoured friends, cousins and brothers and sisters. I am assuming they were not eating acorns and that something else tasty had been placed in the tree. It seems the home is near a calm sea and the scene is set at night with a gentle breeze. The moon comes out and they are outside on the lawn and it is an atmosphere of love although the Greco-Roman gods referenced evoke a rather disturbing incestuous erotic feel to that which might be inappropriate in this context and it may be that the author does not know the stories about these gods that well.

This reads like an innocent family occasion characterised by love and togetherness. The words do not really conform to any stylistic patterns but are rather designed to express emotions which are edifying and affirming to read.
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1285
Review of Lone Pine  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi I received this by random review and found it intriguing.

The poem has a loose structure designed to express some profound perceptions/feelings which do not come together with much clarity for me. So I apologize that while I loved some of the lines here I left the poem quite confused.

For instance the use of light imagery. If there is no moon and you are in a dark forest then you do not see your shadow fall or the river run red. Maybe there is a fire that lit the river red, is the whole forest burning, thus explaining her random direction planning?

The dying embers of a fire do not fill your lungs with smoke.

Did the lady get lost in a forest after the party and then just as dawn was breaking some guy catches up with her off the beaten track or did she get caught in a forest fire but is saved as dawn breaks by some guy or is this an expression of what she feels more than what she sees
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1286
Review of Down and Dirty  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I received this by random review and got hooked by the plot and it made me laugh.

It is something which a great many married men can empathize with and that probably contributed to the sense of deja vue I had reading it. The text itself was well written, with no obvious mistakes and highlighted the misconceptions that result from speaking different love languages in a relationship. The one about intimacy and physical touch and the other about show me by your deeds that you love me and are playing your part in maintaining the nest we share. The only criticism I would make is that the punch line seemed a little predictable but then maybe that is because I have already lived this story many times.
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1287
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Interesting review I was unaware the Bahai faith was subscribed to by a European monarch in what was a predominantly Christian era. Also time and faith are interwoven. Queen Victoria, a devout Christian, was quoting the sentiments of Gamaliel Acts 5:39 which echoes Ecc 3:14. The British monarchy is still there but the Rumanian one is gone.
1288
1288
Review of SPOUSES AND DOGS  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.5)
So I reviewed this as a cat person and as someone who thinks he understands the difference between a dog and a woman. A dog smells far worse and I can think of various activities that just would not occur between me and a dog. I mean things like an in depth conversation of course. Every relationship is unique and people have their own love history. Dogs also like cats have their own personality. So these kinds of generalizations are dangerous and people will always end up debating them. Think if I had written this poem my wife would have punched me.
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1289
Review of The Poetry Weeper  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Powerful words about the experience of failing vision especially in darkness. Who can say what walks across our vision when our eyes no longer tell us what is actually there but rather lie to us. Vision becomes the product of a mind that blinds, of confused dreams and useless as a guide through the night. This poem has a rather random structure but its brilliant descriptive power overwhelms all criticisms I might make of that. It is poetry that weeps for lost vision.
1290
1290
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (4.0)
The inevitable growth of the cancer cell is described on the lines of a successful business growing against the opposition. By all measures accountants can verify its success and those heroic little employees , the cancer cells, are doing a grand job driving the success of the business. The damage done outside of the company tumor is irrelevant and would evaporate with acquisition or merger. Immune cells are painted as shareholders or wall street analysts skeptical of the annual report by the CEO lauding the companies success. But hey who cares what they think the cancer will take them too in time. I love the concept and the writing here is original, clear and well structured. Is this satire on company greed or irresponsibility and the damage it causes or is this dark humor from someone mocking the growth of what will ultimately kill him and attempting to see it from the darkness's perspective?
1291
1291
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Some exquisite phraseology and beautiful sweeping magical vistas of possibility in this chapter. Clearly it is a part of a wider world of imagination which would have to also be read to fully comprehend all the details and references contained in it. I loved the sword fight which was so much more than just two expert swordsmen squaring off. A simple spell checker should reveal a number of occasions when two words were blurred into the same one e.g. the world wasalready doomed. The basic plot reads something like one of those fantasy games where skills and objects are collected as a person progresses through the various levels. It is unclear whether Jace made the right choice when he took the caves or indeed if there is anything like an objective right and wrong in this parallel universe of the mind. I loved this line which was pregnant with a thousand stories of its own:

"Through some mysterious, primordial misdeed; some cosmic catastrophe, the Sun Kingdom fell into ruin, its fracture giving birth to division, echoing through eternity in every instance since. Only a few maintained their original wisdom and supernatural gifts. For this, they were branded as magicians, witches and sorcerers. Wizards. To the more enlightened, they’re known as Tears. Tears shed for utopia lost.”
1292
1292
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.0)
Survival is a precondition to thriving and thriving cannot occur without it. Living is something that occurs at a level of mere survival or in the richness of thriving. Most humans do not have a mission beyond the basic necessities of life or enjoying themselves. The few that do have a mission may have it given to them, may inherit it from the group or lineage they belong to or grow it themselves. So to say it is a human instinct is an exaggeration. The end conclusion is that this saying is neither wise or accurate. But at least it was thought provoking
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1293
Review of Payback  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.0)
If this is meant to be Haiku it does not fit the 5-7-5 syllable pattern. Since I have 3 brothers a lifestyle of not pranking brothers seems unrealistic to me. Jello powder in the bed would be sticky but not the worst a brother could do if he set his mind to it.
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1294
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.5)
Short and simple is often the most effective way to say. But think a card of this sort would need a happy picture of the sun rising somewhere pretty , or smiling people or something like that to make it work. Also who sends to whom is important and how and when the delivery occurs.
1295
1295
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (4.0)
Some really good phrases in this one and a lot of wisdom. There is a loose rhyming structure on 2nd and 3rd lines which is broken in the second stanza (varied and buried do not rhyme). Not sure who the author is quoting in the last and second from last stanzas. The view of truth and therefore honesty here is a relational one that requires interaction. So the liar blames the one deceived for allowing a false image to grow in their heads. In practice honesty can be enforced in a variety of more objective ways using the scientific method, historical arguments from primary sources and witnesses and from revealed sources also and the subjective relational forms of truth discussed in this poem could in fact be tested against these.
1296
1296
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.0)
Must admit not usually into werewolf dramas as they do not exist and seem to represent a dark craving for superpowers that would do no one any good. But your piece was interesting. The plot is a little confused and it is not clear who is a simple wolf, who is human if anyone, who a werewolf , what alpha marked celestial beings are. If the parents are simple wolves what did the alpha marked celestial being comment mean? Darion Collins has a werewolf officer implying he is an werewolf - but must admit I am completely confused on this point. The text should clarify these kinds of things and who is who and what type of creature. There are also some awkward phrases

1) "I only need you and a small drop of your blood" - surely this could be an either or. If all you need is some blood take it. If the whole person take her.

2) "Everybody back at my place wants to see an immortal like you get experimented on a lot more since you left the laboratory back then" = Since you left the laboratory way back then everybody back at my place has wanted to see an immortal like you get experimented on a lot more."
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1297
Review of Joel  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Very powerful writing that captures the awfulness of having a member of the family get this horrible illness. Here even love connections are lost with memories eaten up by this disease. Guess the mental activity required to interact with other authors here on writing.com and to create your own content does provide a kind of protection against this by keeping minds agile. There was little to criticise in the writing style here which was done in the simple style of a parent - child interaction.
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1298
Review of new fears  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (1.0)
Awful content skilfully executed. I was going to give you 4 stars but you asked for 1 so I will rate this one. The imagery is downright putrid and fits the Zombie genre very well capturing the self disgust of the rooting body. That old fears have evaporated to be displaced by this nightmare is hardly a positive development.
1299
1299
Review by LightinMind
Rated: E | (3.0)
A poem about love translated from Hindi and from a culture that may have a more impersonal understanding of love than in a Western culture. Here love is described as an irresistible force moving inside you and transforming you but there is no mention of a beloved "other" at all. Maybe something is also lost in translation as there is no structure or rhyme to this poem.
1300
1300
Review of A BIT O' BULL  
Review by LightinMind
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Amusing farm tale of a sheep called Rastus that thinks like a bull, but which does not exactly have the bulk to take them on. But somehow he bounces off opponent after opponent undeterred and ready for the next though he seemed a bit shaken by Poly (Napoleon) the last one. The poem keeps a A-B : C-D rhyming structure and seemed competent enough.
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