Wow! That's a powerful piece. It's absolutely beautiful. It touches the heart strings of a Christian. I guess that's called praying without ceasing. Kneel and pray, sit and pray, stand and pray, wait and pray, study and pray, go and pray.
That about covers it all.
Oh, by the way, I found no boo boos. Keep writing. You do a wonderful job. I like the messages in everything I've read so far. It has been very uplifting.
I didn't see any typos; or at least I don't think I did. I "ain't fer shur". One question. How did you find out where I live? LOL
It's not quite that bad around here, but sometimes almost. I use to work for a chiropractor. One day this beautiful teenage girl came in. She could have easily been a model. She was dressed to the T. She looked at me and said, "I need ta git a a-jest-ment."
Of course, I cracked up. I loved her sense of humor. Come to find out, that's exactly how she talked, and she had no sense of humor. After she had come in several times and the chiropractic adjustments got her back on the path of good health, she ran off with the circus.
I've learned a whole new vocabulary since we moved here. LOL
Oh, I'm sorry. Back to the story. You did great. The only thing that "f" word. Shouldn't it be "thart"? Again, I'm sorry, that's a family joke. When my youngest son was little, he couldn't pronounce the letter f. Everything that started with an f, he began with th. He caught me in a nice little family restaurant once, and told me "thumbody tharted". I couldn't understand him, so of course I kept asking him what he said. His daddy kept telling me to let it slide. But not me. My baby had spoken to me, and being the good mother I was, I intended to keep on until I could understand what he was saying. After about 10 attempts (getting louder with each attempt), I understood him. I then realized everybody in the place, but me, had understood him the second time he spoke.
Again, I'm sorry. This had nothing to do with your writing. I tend to get carried away.
This was hilarious. Keep up the good work. You do such a great job with all your writings. I enjoy reading them.
WOW! I don't know what they thought Isaac was guilty of, but you sure told them didn't you? Good for you!
Like they say, if we don't stand for something, we'll fall for anything. You took the stand you thought was right, and I admire you for this.
Keep standing and keep writing.
It pays to have those yearly pap smears and mammograms.
I'm glad your cancer was found in time. Best of luck.
I think it's great that you're willing to share your experience to help others.
Keep up the good work in that area, and keep writing.
Very good. I think we can convince ourselves of anything, but we just can't stay convinced. The imagine can only work so long; then we either come back to reality, or never return.
I found one error, listed below:
Everything’s the same, nothingsnothing's changed, nothing new
You and your poetry remind me of an artist with a brush. Everything blends in so smoothly. It's always colorful. After reading the poem, I still have images in my head of the sun shining, green blades of grass, Mama Pig's curly tail; and I can see standing on her hind legs dancing around. And so much more. You did a great job. Good luck.
I found this poem to be very touching. It's so wonderful, that God (I Am) is so merciful and forgiving.
As I read the second stanza, I thought of the Tower of Babel, and how God stopped this endeavor. My Bible Club kids built a book in their Bible Club meetings, and one of the stories we covered was the Tower of Babel. I wrote them a little story about it. "Invalid Item" You might enjoy reading this. I think your poem covered the answer to the question.
I especially like the way you give Bible scripture reference at the end of it.
Because a writers life is quite surely blessed. should be writer's life
I'm putting you on my favorite authors so I can come back and visit. I have really enjoyed this visit. Please feel free to check out my port. grandmapenny
Well, you've done it again. You wrote another good story. I liked this one better. To show how well you did with your description: I'm not a chocolate lover, but I almost drooled while reading about all the chocolate. LOL My mind was running ahead as I was reading. You had my imagination flowing. Thanks for sharing. I'm glad the big guy let the little guys go home for the holiday.
P.S. Whatever you do, don't write a story about (my favorite) dill pickles. I'd drown for sure. LOL
I caught a couple boo boos I thought you might want to fix.
The snow ‘tis no place for the likes of us. Since 'tis is what I think would be a contraction for it is, 'tis doesn't fit here. You could have said, "The snow; 'tis no place for the likes of us."
You seemed to have done ok with the sentence structure. I didn't see any typos. You certainly held my interest.
I enjoyed the beginning of the story. It seemed true to life as it started out. It wasn't what I was excpecting.
Knowing that in this day and time, parents and some folks in authority aren't aware of what someone else is teaching our children, I thought, "Yipee, somebody besides me is going to speak out."
When something looks good, we don't bother to check it out. I can remember when a teacher at the school my children went to, seemed to be the perfect teacher. He not only was a teacher, but a friend to the students and their parents. As it turned out, he was using the parents' friendships to gain their trust. He spent time with their children and did the wrong things. Thank God, he didn't get to my children, but it was because we prayed God's protection on them everyday and night.
This is what I thought this story would be like.
All in all, it's a great story. It's just not my kind of story. I wish the children had turned on him in the end. Better yet, they could have turned on the principal who spoke so highly of him, without checking out the complaints he heard.
Keep writing. You do a very good job with your writing.
Ken, I gave you a 5 because I found no errors and certainly don't see the need for improvement on this.
Keep up the good work and keep writing. This is great.
Reading this was like a breath of fresh air. Thanks for sharing your work, it's a blessing.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/grandmapenny/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/38
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.57 seconds at 1:34pm on Jul 01, 2024 via server web1.