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751
Review of let me be myself  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 13+ | (2.5)

"Let Me Be Myself" needs editing Punkrocker, you're certainly entitiled to write whatever you like, opinions, satire, comedy, short stories, articles, here on WC where almost anything goes.

Generally, I is capital I in prose pieces. Which truly makes it easier on readers / raters/ reviewers.

Lady is not ldy.

Things like that, which, believe it or not are simple to correct.

Sure, lots of times the keyboard fingers take off, typo blasting. Best to re-read, re-edit, kinda expected, you understand.

Plus you always have the choice to scrap a few, start countless others. Teff abandons them right and left.

Well, best Thanksgiving. Swing by after revamping your item, if you like.

Cordially,

 HURRICANE WATCH  (18+)
Reporters reflect on 9-1-1 during a hurricane
#915872 by April Sunday




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Review of Break!  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (4.0)

With BREAK, a song by Brettinator, one can only say, this comes to mind after first reading.

Way Out On The Highway!

Looking for Adventure!

Thought at first to give this the old 3 star rate for poetry ... see Post 111 "MOFFETT FILES TAKE FIVE"  for Teffom poetry rates.

But what the hey, Thanksgiving Morning,
child's posted a song. Time to be thoughtful, generous and thankful for songwriters around the worldwide web.

Four Star! Songwriter. Teff loves songs.

Cordially,

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#960972 by Not Available.
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753
Review of To Laugh Like He  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Poet / author, Adam Lynch offers TO LAUGH LIKE HE, a poem about laughter. The ability to laugh, the desire to heave the chuckle.

Rhymes well.
Punctuation firm.
Original.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Cordially,

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754
Review of Soul MAte  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Jeff, oops, Ffej, Teff here, ready to review you, from Read-A-Newbie Page. Welcome to WC, BTW.

A few silly typos. In the title, take a look there, mate. MAte. Teff does this all the time, ffej. It's the crumby cap button held down too long. A mini second resulting in hours of corrections in typing. Nasty old button.

Billed as a draft, might we see the finished product soon?

No glaring mistakes, grammer fine.

From the item's content one may venture a guess. Perhaps the narrator is deeply in love? Probably a blessed, good thing.

Cordially, T. Teffom

aka ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Sigs from ESPRIT.
755
755
Review of The Fulcrum  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (4.0)

THE FULCRUM from the pen of Anne B .. .... Stop the presses. Say, is this missing a final stanza, Anne, hon?

Now:
 The Fulcrum  (E)
a poem about a devestating change in my life that happened over lasagna
#1037607 by Anne B.


is out there, that's certain. But what about the lasagna, huh ???

The story line is fine, and Teff practically worships story poems, admiring the art of telling a story in poetic format.

Grammer fine. One use of small I in second stanza, see it, dear poet?

Oh, phooey, perhaps, Teffy revved this prematurely. Copy-rite, today. Wow, this website is a speedy one.

Please get back to me on this one, Anne.

Happy Thanksgiving to the B family.

Cordially,

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756
Review of MATTHEW IS 'LOST'  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)

Dreamer! Dreamer, this is a very good start for the TV show Lost. One almost sees it as if on the silver screen. It seems to flow well, has potential and moves along very well via tenses. Glad to not read a handful of hads and had beens. Proud of you for using present tense. Keep this going!

MATTHEW IS LOST offers content of a moving story, punctuation and grammer firm. Scenes credible. Author gives full credit to source.

Cordially, Teff
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757
Review of Islam in Malaysia  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Hello, Abdul, how are you faring?

Glad to both read and review this startlingly, extra informative piece from your pen, sir.

You do WC a great service posting this while bringing readers and intersted parties up to speed on the day-to-day life in the Malasian Regime.

Thank you. Hope you will continue to contribute more pieces like this article.

Thank you for this first hand tell-all, well written read.

Cordially,

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758
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)
Nov, 21, 2005 The Monday
Dear author, Distant Blonde,

Your new work, THROUGH THESE EYES OF MINE stands up to the world as a poem of faith. The category for which is far from controversial, an acceptable topic.

In a sense the poem is also frought with a personal side.

Authors, poets, members, better check this one, there's a new girl on the block to welcome to WC.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

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#938484 by Not Available.
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Review of untitled  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Posted on Wed, Nov 16, 2005, Untitled, a poem from .luceo.non.uro, falls into line with 2,347 items on Read-A-Newbie Page.

Luceo beseeches readers for a suggested title in the intro for this poetic endeavor.

Like: "The bitter pill you couldn't bring yourself to swallow ...."

Welcome to WC. May your time here be pleasant and productive, dear poet.

Cordially, Teff

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#1030559 by Not Available.
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Review of What of Memory  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)


Reference to The Mississippi River is contained in WHAT OF MEMORY, a mini-poem by Sadeline. Coasting in murky waters, via soporific lines, without (bereft) of further explanations. Nice try, dear poet."

Alabama Courier Sunday Ed // Nov. 20, 2005 // T.Teffom


The Suggestion: Perhaps a few more specifics. While adding more stanzas probably won't hurt.

 Reviewing Wisdom 1, 2, 3 GO!  (18+)
Criteria for Cordially from MS TEFFs REVs sent
#945969 by April Sunday
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Review of Immigrant Boy  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)


Only one tiny objection, dear author, for IMMIGRANT BOY, where is the conclusion for the thought line here?

Maybe adding a little more will help readers, raters and reviewers have a little more to go by. May I humbly suggest a lot more. While one has the feeling you may already desire to express and elaborate upon your trip to Ellis Island, NY. No?

Of course, impossible to judge what is not written.

Best in all you do, welcome to Writing.C.

Cordially, Teff with new e-mail & strong coffee
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Review of I Remember  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (5.0)


Nov. 20, 2005
Dear Lorenzo Coco Sr.

As I toy with the decision to rate this poem a five star, I'm certain you're feeling your brother's sincere loss to your family. Please accept my sympathy at this time.

On another note in ordinary time, worrying about ratings is shared by all. Stopping posting several works in progress from my own port is the result of ratings. And sir, these can be very low or on the opposite end of the stick, very high. You may want to check out sev of my pieces on Reviewing and my forum, The Moffett Files Take 3, to continue in that vein. Somedays, Teff (that's me) becomes the self-proclaimed guru of opinions on these matters.

Of your poem, one can surely see a childhood lived to the hilt, with a loving family in the background, and a thread so thick between brotheres, that no, it cannot be severed.

Now, you must look to the wife and the family and celebrate as best you can the holidays ahead. Recently, I lost my father, Paul in Feb and sometimes I look beside me and he is still there, in my heart, in my mind and in my peripheral vision. Photos help, believe it or not.
As by reading and enjoying, almost adopting your heartfelt poem, I am reminded nothing helps as much as OUR memories.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

Thanks for this poem which reminds us all of a way to look at life lived and provides between the lines an outlet for grief.

God Bless, Mr. Coco.

Cordially,

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Oh, please keep writing, perhaps we'll hear more from you, maybe even in short story form one day. For, this is a guess, I think you have some stories to tell. Think to setting and then to character and you're off and running.
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Review of Holes  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)


[c:rose} Sometimes best to always check genre before reading into poems or prose.

Genre: Emotional
Genre: Women's Experience

The poem HOLES, by Dacia M offers up some surprising lines, then seems ready to align with revenge.

However, poem sticks to cadence and rhyme, easily read and understood.

Happy Thankgiving, welcome to WC, and hope you post again.

Teff
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Review of Freedom  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

No genre mentioned or chosen by author, Fungah. FREEDOM is a brief essay about a first person narrator taking a look back. Thoughts are frought through with descriptions of unruly situations.

Hard to figure this one.

Cordially,
Teff
765
765
Review of Be Black  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)


Praise for this powerful poem, dear poet, is not simply enough. We do look around and feel as if Black Americans are still being cheated.

Why should this be so? Teff has little answers but knows the wrongness of all crime, black on black, white on white.

Lighten up, vote proper, smile. Be ourselves, no matter who we be. Is that a start? For outside the City of Brotherly Love, where many problems exist, have existed there is a place called Valley Forge.

At Valley Forge you will find the names of Black American citizens who fought for the American Revolution.

With your poem, BE BLACK, the lines are delivered with absolute eloquence and accuracy.

Know, Mikall, you are not alone in wondering about your future. ALL of us do from time to time, therefore like your poem, we tend to stress standing side by side as in 1776.

God Bless! What a topic you bring to the table. I hope you get many, many readers for this well written piece in poetic form.

You lecture us, dear writer.

Worse, we (and senators) probably deserve the banter.

Cordially,

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766
Review by April Sunday
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)

 ??? first work out of spontenaity(sp?)  (13+)
One late night i was inspired to write, this is my first ever attempt.
#1034518 by C Rus


C Rus, your piece seems to go in and out of consciousness. For a first attempt at penning a story, this is very good. Don't forget your spaces between paragraph breaks. You can run it through a spell check by hitting spell in the editing line. WC provides a fairly sizeable dictionary on site.

Sum: Has a fellow performed or not performed a brutal act upon a female acquaintance?

Members, guests, authors, reviewers click here and decide for yourselves.

Decent work, Rus! Simply needs an edit to shorten the questions the character asks himself.

Cordially,
Teff

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767
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Cherry Lane's poem, THIS BIPOLAR BRAIN may be brief but it is certainly informative.

Emotional, yet author handles a difficult subject very well indeed.

Welcome to WC, hope to see more from you, Lane.

Cordially,

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768
Review of World of Shadow  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: ASR | (3.0)


N Sildurien posts WORLD OF SHADOW, admitting in the intro and the poem itself a fondness for, shall we say, gray skies.

As opposed to and shunning:

" ... cruel summer light."

Well let's assume this poet enjoys non-sunny Novemeber skies with a Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Cordially,
Teff

Here's more gloom, N S ---

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Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (4.5)


THE PEOPLE YOU CAN SUE! by flogamocker is a ribald read, laughable yet charming.

Best lines below. Teff loves these.

"Procure a good lawyer
And go out and sue!"

Who to sue?

"The butcher,
The baker,
The hot coffee-maker."

Funny points about a way of life available to all financially, so it seems these days.

Cordially, Teff

Sue This!

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#1030559 by Not Available.
770
770
Review of Lovers club  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Now, unnoticed, don't be shy. Just teasing due to your pen name.

LOVER'S CLUB is a great title. You'll need your word busting, spell checker on high alert. Don't we all?

Re-edit for: Comfortable
canvas
I prefer capital I for I
I'd

Ah, one more Romantic poem in the Writing. Com archives.

Rhyme on! Welcome to the website, hon.

Cordially,

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771
771
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (4.0)

Dear Aruna,

Telling readers about the search for a job by a professional in the field comes across loud & clear in MAKING A DIFFERENCE FOR YOURSELF. Yet the coming across itself seems to be the ultimate problem.

Chronologically:

Try to do a few extra spell checks here. If unsure the rule is to always do them and keep doing them when other sentences are added in.

The paragraph breaks are an absolute mess. Simply go back into the piece, read it as reviewers and readers do and tie these broken pieces together for smoothness plus clarity. Thus no one out here gets impatient and worse, stops reading.

Realizing the piece posts very recently, and that you are a new member, is one reason to cut you a break on the minors.

Thus the Four Star for endeavor in tackling a harsh subject, low employment availability, despite an applicant's educational stats.

Happy Thanksgiving! Welcome to WC.

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772
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

Dear Ladyazn,

Your brief fictional account of Katrina hitting N'Orlans shows an attempt at aiming into the storm with the criterion stretched for present circumtances there at the time.

Chronologically:

Isn't Madi Gras in the Spring, near Lent?

The entire city was informed of the approaching hurricane.

Perhaps verbs can resemble past or present tense, where past perfect generally comes off as far too wordy.

And last of all. This was posted Nov 17, maybe you can re-address paragraph breaks at your leisure on next reading or edit.

Nice try, just needs a bit more reality, hon.

Best Thanksgiving ahead.

Cordially,

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773
773
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (5.0)



P S Foster you do all farm kids a favor with NOTHING RUNS LIKE A DEERE. Whether they be young or old, long having graduated from the sight of a John Deere parked inside an empty barn. Which usually means: Hey, I'm a monster, won't you ride on me?

Two boys take the ultimate adventure, and in the meantime take out a gate while driving the tracter that in reality should be taboo.

Why keep the keys in the things, right?

Well written fun read!

Cordially,

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

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Review of The Cure  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)

The Cure ---

 The Cure  (E)
i wrote this from my heart and I want an Honest Review of how good or bad it is
#1032736 by Savic


May be shorter than reviews solicited to critique this short poem.

Mostly, we tend to always capitalize I.
So there's one correction, Savic, dear.

A suggestion for the poem is hard to make, for sometimes it is hard to review, revamp or rekindle some type of method to place the brevity of what we don't read before our very eyes --- into a proper perspective.

Generally, one can note by simply reading poems of this nature that there are many of similar ilk. And, sorry, no they do not jump out and grab even the most romantic readers by the thumb nails.

So, mostly many writers, ALL of us should and can, if we put our minds to it, bring topics to the table of vibrant interest whenever we slave over them long enough, with hopes for creativity, entertainment etc.

Note: The above said, it is not always an easy task, thus our individuality often shows.

Welcome to WC, sweetheart. Look around and ideas will surely generate 'round these parts.

Cordially,

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Review of A Winter's Tale  
Review by April Sunday
Rated: E | (3.0)


GumRimJa posts A WINTER'S TALE, Nov 14, found on Read-A-Newbie Page.

Welcome to WC, Gum. The title for your poem, although billed as lyrics, reminds one of A Winter's Tale, a novel by Mark Helprin.

Helprin, famous author wrote then of a New York City past and present. His novel is larger and heavier than my Webster's New World Dictionary often used here for spelling and vocab, as I write these reviews right straight into the box WC provides. And, yes, I strongly recommend the book for pleasant reading, especially in the winter time.

Your poem tells of a love that is lost, past. Rhymes are fine, maybe just needs one more eye-catching stanza or more.

Nice attempt, keep posting.

Cordially,

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#952447 by Not Available.
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