Title The title is telling what's to come, giving the reader some insight as to what this piece is about.
Rhythm Not necessary in this piece, but it did have a certain rhythm to it, a good pace with each thought.
Reaciton Easily understood. I smiled for the child, and felt compassion for the senior citizen. It is the circle of life, just as the last line says.
Suggestions Nothing to suggest, it stands on its own.
Overall impression Once reading it made me think of my kids when they were small, and then my grandfather. You did a great job of remiding the reader of what things are like as hovering parents and children as well. Nice job.
Title The title has a resounding effect throughout the poem, based on the theme of memories from one's past.
Reaciton It's a bittersweet feeling I have reading this one. Since family memories for each person differ to some degree. But it is easy to see that you write for the good times, and those things outweigh the bad.
Suggestions I wouldn't suggest any changes to this piece.
Overall impression I enjoyed this one. Easy to feel the love you have for your family, and that the memories you hold dear to your heart. Never a bad thing. Thanks for sharing!!
Overview: FF entry that contained a lot of detail. Sorry to see Ed gone, but it was clever to have the wife inside the whole time, taking care of business.
Grammar: nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: Congrats on the Awardicon, much deserved. You included so much detail and information I found it hard to believe it was 300 words. Thanks for the delightful read.
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Title The title is the question that plagues the author, that never seems to go away because they are still waiting for the answer, the one that doesn't come, the one that is needed almost in desperation to understand.
Persona I would say the author is the speaker, speaking to those that have violated her in the worst possible way. It's filled with emotional depth, heartache, and lack of understanding.
Imagery Since this is more of an open letter - I'd say there isn't a lot of imagery used here. It's more a range of emotions, or unanswered questions, questions that plague and never go away. The author is searching for the answer, almost as if they will never be complete/whole again until there is a sense of understanding.
Structure Structure was fine and made it easy to read. There is some repetition of certain thoughts, but the unaswered question is the driving force behind this piece of writing.
Theme The "why" is the theme. The author is searching, still after a certain amount of time, and will continue to ask this question until it is answered.
Grammar Just a few little things to point out.
You scared me for life.--did you mean scare, or scar?
Overview: A poem about a house fire and what is left afterwards.
Grammar: Only thing I will point out is repetition. You used the word 'gone' twice very close together. It would be easy to swap out the second one for the word 'lost' or something to that effect.
Personal Opinion: Losing everything you hold dear is always tough to deal with. I liked how you used words to decribe the fire itself, and even feel you can use more emotion to convey the loss, the crackling of the wood.
Overview: Someone waits to tell his big secret, hoping their friend will understand.
Grammar: nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: It was a bit confusing with the inner dialogue, since it was as if more than one person were carrying on this conversation. I realize that was the intention, but it made me go right back to the beginning to see if I'd missed something before I ever made it to the end.
Overview: A man returns home to find it empty and soon realizes that he is completely alone, no one else is around. Upong futher exploration, he finds a boy named Billy. Later he finds a strange box that he believes has much to do with the disappearnce of everyone.
Grammar:
It looked a lot like a normal plastic box, nothing significant
Personal Opinion: Would have liked to get more into the main characters head. Wasn't he upset to find his family gone? No tears, no sadness. He seemed more like a robot going through the motions than a human being. Just a thought.
Overview: OMG, loved this. A poem that uses Springsteen song's in every line. Great rhyme. Bolding the titles made them stand out. Reading it a second time brought the melodies into my head.
Grammar: Nothing to point out, everything good here.
Personal Opinion: Seriously think you should send this one on to the man himself. Very clever, and fun at the same time. Thanks for the read.
Overview: Wow, I don't even know where to being. Doc - you can write! LOL, just kidding. You pack quite a punch in this short story. Painted a grizzly scene, and took me on a journey I didn't expect. I have so many questions, like that I have to try and figure things out for myself. The river played well into this piece, dumping the body, getting tangled. I loved how Frenchie even joked to himself, plotting his next move. But that was not to be. Great story.
Grammar: Nothing to point out, everything was good here.
Personal Opinion: Loved it. Thinks it's the first thing I've read of yours. I'll be back for more that is a promise. Thanks so much for sharing this. Even got a bit of a history lesson.
Overview: From a man's perspective, a way to solve a great issue in the complicted world. When I first read 5 wives, I burst out laughing, thinking it was the craziest thing I'd ever read. Upon delving further, I saw your point loud and clear.
Grammar: NA - everything was good here, nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: I must say you have a unique way of looking at things. 5 being the happy medium. I imagine they would all have to work hard in order to keep up that type of situation. Thanks for the read.
Overview: A poem of nature that shows different aspects. Great job with visuals, bringing the reader into see what is all around them.
Grammar: nothing to point out. All good.
Personal Opinion: Rhyme was well done throughout. My favorite part was the stanza about the willow tree. That part reached out and grabbed me, put a clear picture in my mind and made me sad. Loneliness always fills me with sadness. Nice job.
Overview: A quick story where you wonder who is telling the story, which becomes clear at the very end.
Grammar: Nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: I did really want to know who was telling the sotry. Was it the house? Was it something I could not see. Reading a second time, it is easy to see that the dog would hear and see all of those things around him, waiting for that one moment of pure happines when the man comes home. Nice job. Write on.
Flow/Rhyme: Nice flow throughout each stanza. The rhyme remained in every stanza.
Grammar: Nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: A poem about remembering a past love. Romantic, with beautiful images woven from line to line. The line - frail, human, and alone - really stood out. Brings great sadness with it. No one should ever feel alone.
Overview: The author tells why his birthdate is such a bad one.
Grammar: Nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: Well, I hit your port and saw the standing out, knowing that it holds significance to me as well. It's my anniversary date. But I must say you made me laugh. Here's what I think. Pick a different day, watch and see what happens on that date for the next few years. Bet you can come up with some equally bad reasons to think that day is a bad one as well. Loved the DeNiro reference. Write On!
Overview: Nice poem about a man's life, and hockey as his passion.
Grammar: Only thing I can see is 'joe' might want to capitalize the name.
Personal Opinion: I loved it. I'm a huge hockey fan, so this I get. Nothing ever wrong with doing something you love. Rhyme was good, and it had nice flow. Just made me smile to read it. Thanks for that. Write on!
Overview: A woman lives in a hotel room with her young son, a drift in drugs, and not caring how she is treated to get what it is she desperately needs.
Grammar: Nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: It's quite gripping, had me on the edge of my seat. A few things you might want to consider. When stating what your character is thinking, you can put those thoughts in italics, and take out the 'she thought'. Also the conversation gets lost in the story. Might want to make it a stand alone paragraph for readability. Is there more in your port for this story? I'd be interested in reading more.
Overview: Sweet poem. All revolved around one person that makes you feel.
Grammar: nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion:
Easy to see how this one special person makes you feel. Nice rhyme in the first two stanza's. I did like that you changed the last and focused on yourself, your emotions. Good job.
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Title Title is present throughout the entire piece, both spoken and felt.
Persona Author is speaking to a loved one, one that is no longer with them.
Diction Last line is very telling, even sad.
Imagery Author does a good job of touching on the senses and bringing images to mind.
My Opinion A lot of information and conflicting feelings in this short piece. My take would be of a person who has lost someone to suicide unexpectedly. But, yet, you know them so well, that you sense/see their fears.
Overview: Wow you did a great job with the prompt. It had good flow as the story of the old flames rekindled. Loved the last stanza, not knowing if it was real or all a fantasy/dream.
Grammar: Nothing to point out.
Personal Opinion: I enjoyed it a lot. Anything that can take the reader along for the ride is always a good thing. You did it very well. Good luck in the quickie!
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Purpose and Audience The authors focus remains firm throughout the piece. The audience is the residents of Michigan, which I happen to be.
Consistency and Cohesiveness Yes, it is consistant throughout, driving home the author's opinion.
Structure The structure is fine. Summed up fine at the end.
Style Facts are cited, but I found it to be one opinion, without a suggestion, but more looking for someone to come in and fix the stated problem.
Mechanics I found no grammatical errors.
Personal Response I found that author did research information for this article, but I tend to disagree. Just because Gov. Granholm comes up with a plan, does in no way mean that the worst offenders will be released back into society early. There are less violent criminals that could be released to give the state a small break. Other avenues are being sought as well to help relief the financial crisis Michigan finds itself in.
Title/Author: Friends Can Bring Inspiration, by aralls
Overview: A conversation between two people in chat, talking about prompts for a contest. Since I'm a chattie, I had no problem following the conversation-at all. It was funny to see the major differences between the two as they looked at the visual prompts, what they saw, and what they got out of it.
Grammar: Notihng to point out.
Personal Opinion: vI laughed, liked to see the conversation I missed. And yes, I can see how knowing who Mary Tyler Moore is can you make feel old when others are clueless. I'm not clueless, guess that makes me old. Wonderful.
Overview: A sad tale of a girl who has lost her father and still continues to struggle with his passing. She remembers a wonderful time in her life, a precious memory to hold onto that will last a lifetime.
Grammar:
Laughing,, I remembered him throwing it back.
Personal Opinion: Nice story. Gripping and sad, but with a clear message. Life does go on, and yes, we do leave a little part of ourselves behind in those that we love.
Overview: Whoa, never expected this one. Great job at setting the tone, and explaining why she died. The boy could take no more, had to hear her say the one thing he waited years for, yet he never thought for one moment that she would not know the answer to his question.
Grammar: I found no errors.
Personal Opinion: This was something for such a short piece. I can sympathize with him, just wanting that acknowledgement. But to go the lenths he did, boggles my mind. Nice job.
Overview: A gripping piece of a woman who thought love would be enough, that her lover would never turn into something she would end up depising. Love turned into a bitter word, because of a possessive man who made her give up everything she once was. It pulled me in in the very first paragraph and held me until the last line. You do a great job of evoking emotion, pulling on the heartstrings of your reader.
Grammar: I found no errors.
Personal Opinion: Great job with this one. I feel for the woman, wish she'd find someway out. It is easy to identify with her, with what her life has turned into.
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