I'm impressed with the way you were able to condense the narrative of Moby Dick into exactly 100 words. In exercises like this, every word counts and I think you did a great job with it.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I enjoyed reading this piece. Nice work!

I thought you did a great job capturing the raw emotions that can come along with caring for someone. Love and relationships are complicated emotions and you managed to communicate your feelings on the matter clearly and concisely.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this piece. Well done!

I thought you did a great job on this piece, particularly with the imagery and the structure of the piece. It was a strong read from start to finish, and really evocative. Well done!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I think you did a great job with this. Nice work!

I thought you did a great job with the structure and imagery in this piece. The rhyme scheme was well-suited to the subject matter, and you did a great job writing evocative stanzas. Nice work!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this piece. Well done!

I really enjoyed the moral of the story in this tale. You did a great job of presenting a situation and resolving it with a lesson for others in a short amount of space. It was a quick, easy, and informative read. Nice work!

There were quite a few technical errors in the piece, including missed spaces, omitted quotation marks (either at the beginning or end of a piece of dialogue), and no paragraph breaks, which made the experience of reading it a little slower and more tedious than it otherwise would have been. I'd recommend a quick proofread and polish to smooth things out a bit.

Overall, this was a very enjoyable story. Well done!

The detail and description in this piece is excellent. You do a great job of establishing tone and letting the tension play out not just by telling the reader, but by showing the audience. This is a skill that even longtime screenwriters don't always do well, so the fact that you can so clearly create a visual image in the reader's mind on your first screenplay is really impressive. Nice work!

In a screenplay, you typically only describe what can be seen and heard, since the other three senses (taste, touch, smell) are not something the audience can experience. In a line like, "The heat wraps around her like a blanket, the dry scent of eucalyptus and distant petrol lingering in the air." I'd remove everything after "blanket" because the last part of that line about the eucalyptus and the petrol scents aren't information that any department of a production can convey to the audience.

I noticed a tendency to repeat the same information over and over again. As Alexis arrives at Pernilla's apartment and crosses the courtyard, she drums her fingers on the cover of her notebook and "the tapping echoes the rhythm of her wandering mind." Then, just one scene later, she's again tapping her notebook lightly against her thigh, "matching the nervous rhythm of her mind." Once you've established a character behavior, you don't need to keep over-explaining the rationale behind it. After you first explain the character motivation behind the tapping, you can then just mention that she keeps tapping something in subsequent scenes; the reader doesn't need to always be explicitly told what the motivation is time after time after time, unless it changes substantively.

While camera directions are perfectly fine, be sure that you're not taking away from the narrative quality of the storytelling. When Alexis is waiting outside the door, there were a lot of instructions for SFX, reverse shots, close-ups, etc. And that stuff is perfectly fine when used sparingly (or if you are planning on directing this yourself), it can distract from the read if your goal is to tell a compelling story that will make a producer want to buy it, or an actor want to play the role. For me personally, I'd cut down on the camera directions by about half, reserving it for only the most key moments when capturing what you're going for just cannot be accomplished narratively any other way.

The big-picture issue I had with this script is that Alexis' motivation is unclear. You do a great job of setting up the atmosphere and making it tense, uncertain, etc. as Alexis approaches Pernilla's apartment. And that makes sense, because she's apparently there to ask questions about the brutal murder of someone that Pernilla worked with. And yet, when a complete stranger (Harold) opens the door to her apartment and offers no real explanation for why he's there (which the narrative tells us Alexis finds disconcerting)... and yet Alexis just walks into the apartment and starts asking him questions? I think you need a more compelling reason for why she does something against what I think would be most people's better instincts. Does she need this story for some reason? Tell us why.

Overall, I think there's a lot of potential in your script. The technical screenwriting elements have a strong foundation and can be finessed rather easily with a quick rewrite. The actual story elements themselves need a little more thought and development in order to take them to the next level, but I do think you're off to a good start. Nice work!

I think you did a good job laying out your three points on the problems facing America. I noticed that this piece was originally written in February 2021; I'm curious as to whether your position on any of this has changed in the time since (either as the result of anything that happened in the Biden Administration, or the substantive changes being made to government in the first several weeks of the second Trump Administration).

The one area of this piece that I think could use some expansion or further explanation is the very last point about how your preference would be to restructure government where the federal level was responsible for the military and foreign relations, while everything else is left up to the individual states and how that may help heal the divisions in our country.

How do you see that playing out in practice? To me, the idea of fifty different states determining their own educational priorities, energy and transportation and immigration policies, support for veterans, etc. would make things more divided since every state you visited would have different (and in some cases drastically different) policies in place. I'm genuinely curious about how you see this playing out in your preferred system.

Overall, I thought this was a thought-provoking piece and you did a good job of articulating your three points. It's a great place to build from and expand on. Nice work!

I think you did a good job creating a comprehensive and detailed letter that tackled a lot of different activities that you're planning on participating in. On a personal level, I was also happy to hear that your experience with "Musicology Anthology"  was so positive! I hope you have the same this year with either that contest again, or with "The Bradbury" .

The back-and-forth argument with yourself was an interesting technique, and I'm all for injecting something fresh and unusual into Dear Me entries, but I'm not sure this one entirely worked. It started to feel, to me personally, a little repetitive to read toward the end, and the tone - at times - felt overly self-critical.

Overall, this was a well-written and thorough Dear Me entry. Nice work!

I think there were a lot of great elements to your letter. I particularly liked the way you turned a positive into a negative with your login streak here on Writing.com; a lot of people get really discouraged when they inevitably miss a day on a daily streak (myself included!), but I thought you did a good job maintaining a positive perspective on that.

I would have loved just a little more context on some of your goals. For example, the one with the part-time job doesn't really detail much about what you're working on or how you're hoping things will go this year beyond "making changes" and "making a difference to children's reading." Some practical insights about how you see that working out (or hope it will work out) would improve the piece.

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this Dear Me entry. Good luck with the effort to cross this one off your list; I remember when I was down to my last one (I think mine was Rhythms & Writing) and how much stress that added to the wait for the judging! Deep breaths!

I think you did a good job laying out your goals clearly and concisely. Your letter was a quick, efficient read that made it clear what your intentions are for 2025. Nice work!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I think you did a good job with this entry. Well done!

I thought you did a good job laying out your goals for 2025. They were clearly organized and well articulated.

I'd suggest actually linking the WdC item you're referencing for creating a WdC succession plan. Just naming the number number itself makes it difficult for the reader to know what you're referencing; I'd either name the item as well, or create a WritingML link to it since you already have the number listed.

Overall, this was a good effort. Nice work!

I thought you did a great job with your Dear Me entry this year. You clearly articulated your goals for 2025 and did that by - in part - reflecting on your accomplishments from last year. It was also a nice touch to mention some of the other members of the site who impacted your year in the site.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought you did a great job with this entry. Nice work!

This was a well thought-out Dear Me letter. You've clearly put a lot of time into how you're going to go about accomplishing your goals in 2025, and it definitely shows. Nice job!

There were a few parts that felt unclear or a little contradictory, especially as it relates to social media usage. In the third paragraph, you say that you have a "responsibility to [use social media] to make sure fewer of them end up in echo chambers" (and spend the rest of the paragraph discussing how to reach people on Discord and even starting a Substack), but then in the fourth paragraph say, "Since scaling back social media activities gives you a little time back..." which seems somewhat at odds with the paragraph that came before. I think some additional context/clarification is needed.

Overall, this was a thorough and thought-provoking Dear Me letter. Good work!

I really like the simplicity of this Dear Me letter. So many people overcomplicate it with long lists or detailed nuances of all the things they want to accomplish; I appreciated the acknowledgement that some simple practices are all that's needed sometimes, and that you've thought about how to motivate yourself to accomplish them.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought this was a great entry for "Dear Me: Official WDC Contest" . Well done!

I thought your letter was well-organized and well-presented. You did a great job both looking back at 2024 and looking ahead to 2025, and I appreciated the fact that you have a variety of different goals you want to accomplish this year.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought this was a solid Dear Me entry. Well done!

I really enjoyed this piece. The personification of seventeen was really well done, and I thought the structure of this piece was great and made for an easy, engaging read. Nice work!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought you did a great job with this. Well done!

I really enjoyed this poem. I thought it was particularly elegant in its simplicity while also communicating a whole lot of emotion and meaning. The structure of the haiku was flawless, as far as I can tell... although I'm by no means an expert on poetry!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I really enjoyed this poem. Nice work!

Your article got off to a really interesting start, right off the bat. Someone who judges other people wholly based on their musical tastes is an interesting scenario and you did a good job of getting the reader right into the narrative.

The purpose of the piece was a little unclear due to the way the audience changes. At first it felt like you were talking to an objective third party about this strange relationship you have, but then toward the end it seems to pivot and almost be directed at the individual themselves, then goes back to a more objective, removed point of view. I'd recommend honing the tone and style of the piece a bit to refine the audience you're intending it for.

I'd also recommend a thorough proofread, as there were quite a few typos and grammar errors that caused a hitch in the pace of the read.

Overall, this feels like a very rough and raw piece of writing, but there's some potential here. The scenario you're describing is interesting, and you do a great job of capturing your feelings and emotions about the situation. That's not easy to do and definitely something to build off as you refine the execution.

This is a good intro for your book on Amazon. The teaser immediately captures interest and gets the reader's attention piqued.

You might want to consider adding some additional elements to this Static Item to draw attention to your book. For example, maybe a picture of the cover, or some excerpts from favorable reviews, or other information to entice visitors to check your work out.

Overall, this was a solid sales pitch for your book. There's a little room for improvement, but you're off to a great start. Nice work!

I thought you did a great job with the imagery and the structure of this piece. It was an easy, effective read and I particularly liked the way you ended with a question to the reader. Nice work!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this piece.

I think you did a great job making a distinction between the United Kingdom and the separate, distinct countries which comprise Great Britain. A lot of your points are well-taken, and your examples are spot on.

The one area that stuck for me was the following:

"While England is the largest of the countries on the island of Great Britain, and has the largest population, it is not another word for the UK. It would be like referring to the USA as New York, or Texas. The Queen is the Queen of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, not England."

I spent quite a lot of time thinking through whether that was accurate, and while I think it ultimately is, the imperfection of the analogy definitely threw me off. I wonder if a non-governmental example would be a better analogy so you don't get readers hung up like I did on whether, for example, referring to the USA as one of its states, or whether the monarch of a commonwealth is also the monarch of its collection of smaller countries.

Overall, I think this was an effective, persuasive piece of writing. Well done!

I enjoyed reading this piece. I thought it was well-written and you managed to fit a lot of information and detail in a relatively short piece. I thought the dialogue at the end moved the story along nicely to an effective end.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I enjoyed reading this. Nice work!

I enjoyed this story. I thought you did a great job capturing a lot of information and detail in comparatively few words, and the dialogue effectively moved the story alone.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought this was a solid nice. Nice work!

This was a charming story that you did a great job setting up and paying off. I like the fact that you detailed the importance of a sense of humor to defuse situations at the beginning of the story and then brought it around and paid it off at the end of the story. In such a short piece, that's not easy to do. Well done!

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, this was a light, enjoyable story. Well done!

I thought you did a good job with this story. The 300-word flash fiction stories featuring a prompt of multiple keywords that have to be used can be a real challenge sometimes, and I thought you did well incorporating them into the narrative.

No specific suggestions for improvement.

Overall, I thought you did a good job with this piece. Nice work!