%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
  My blog was filled up. I'm too lazy to clean it out. So I started a new one. |
| Oh, my domestic side came out today. I made old-fashioned bread pudding. It was delicious, but way too sweet. I had two servings before dinner! The old weathered cookbook needs some updating. If I make it again, I'll cut back on the raisins. They plump up and make their own sweet liqueur. I'd reduce the brown sugar. With the raisins, the sugar is just too much. It didn't use as much bread as I thought either, so it didn't get rid of all my bread. When I vacuumed, I moved all the furniture to sweep under it. (I usually do that after the children leave to retrieve all the crayons and small toys.) I cleaned up the refrigerator, which I just did yesterday, but I want to keep it clean. It's a pretty time-consuming process. I sorted through the cosmetics on my dresser top and parted with some of them. I did laundry this morning. I usually have trouble doing all that in one day. I even did my e-mail and cleaned up the files and tried to order concert tickets. By the time I decided I could not get specific seating for an elderly person on-line, the box office was closed and I couldn't do it by phone. After cleaning the kitchen after dinner, I watched jeopardy, only to fall asleep after the last commercial and miss the winner. I managed to study and come back to the computer. Bottom line, I think I could like more days off with no appointments. I love checking things off my mental to do list. |
| My dad is getting older, but he remains in general good health. However, his vision is troubling and his hearing is almost gone. I hate for him to drive. So I took him shopping today. We went to Sam's Club to get a few bulk items. He loves to shop, so he has to look at everything. While he took forever to look at some things I browsed the expensive jewelry and daydreamed, like I would ever have a place to wear a $999 necklace! We ambled back to the car and drove to the fabric store that carried Vanna White yarn. That was for me. He sat in the car while I found what I wanted immediately. I'm planning to teach my 8 year old great niece to crochet, since she told me that was what she wanted. I got her a hook and the yarn and have a tote bag for her. When I got back in the car, I started talking to my dad about waiting in line so long while the only cashier waited on all those customers. As I backed out of my spot with the radio playing, I realized he was snoring and hadn't heard a word I said. He woke up when I pulled to the far side of the shopping center. I asked if he wanted to stop at Kroger, since he had mentioned it earlier. Yes, he wanted bananas. He loves to shop for groceries, so I knew this would be a long time. We parked near the front of the store. He walked in under the big sign Kroger. Halfway down the first aisle after produce, he saw a stand in the aisle that said Kroger, so he pointed to it. I nodded and we kept going. Since he's been in the grocery business most of his life, I thought he was just noticing the display stand. At the far side, after he reviewed all the meat counters, he saw the ice cream case, and said, "They even have Kroger ice cream." Suddenly, it dawned on me that he didn't know where he was. "You're not at Costco. This is Kroger's." He was totally surprised. He told me that he had noticed a man with a cart and thought to himself that he used to work at Kroger. I had noticed him staring at the guy who came out of the double doors, but again I thought it was his industry curiosity. I had wanted to go to Costco, but I realized it was getting late. He probably needed to go home. So I asked, and, yes, he wanted to go home. Nearer to home, we stopped at the drug store, where I picked up my routine prescriptions and some cold medicine and cough drops. He was asleep again, but woke up on our street. He still has physical strength. He could lift the detergent that I could not. I handled the eggs, because he tends to grip the carton too tightly and break a few eggs. He hobbled into the house and tried to do as much as he could. I help but I can't do it all. That would make him feel helpless. He tries to warm up dinner for me when I work late. He has to feel like he's still in control. I can deal with his feebleness and his extended naps. I'll drive him where he needs to go. But it worries me about the confusion. I have to yell to make him hear my soft voice. It takes adjustment on both sides. He has to deal with his loss of self-reliance and dignity. He's always been a strong man who took care of others. His mother, sister, in-laws, wife, and children have leaned on him. Now it's time for him to lean on me, my brothers, and the grandchildren. |
| I am slowly adjusting to the idea of not working. My hours are cut back, which is normal for January in my company. I go to work each day, but as soon as I pull into the parking lot, I tell myself, I don't want to be here. Once, not long ago, I wanted to work over, when I was paid by the hour, to get more time in, more pay. When I was on salary, I worked over even more just to get the job done, even though it was never appreciated or recognized. Not any more. I start counting down the minutes until I can leave at the end of my shift. There was a time when I would look at the stay at home mothers and wonder how they could stand it. Oh, I understood the newborn stage and early toddler time, but I couldn't imagine babysitting and house cleaning all the time. I knew women who bragged about watching soap operas and getting their nails done before the kids got out of school. I couldn't understand how they did not want to get out of the house and be productive in the business world. Now I knew a few who volunteered a lot at the schools or at church or who gardened quite a bit. But I knew more who just took it easy, some without children. One lady told me she didn't have to work because she was a girl. Six months later she was getting a divorce and she was going to come out pretty well financially. Me, I wanted to work and thought everyone else should want to work, too. I told myself I would never retire unless I was rich and could travel instead. Well, now retirement is looking pretty good. I don't mind not working. It's no longer fulfilling. I'm not rich. I can't afford to travel. But I can pay my bills, and I have a roof over my head. I don't crave the latest gadgets. I don't want to take any more classes or plan an alternative career. It's like I have to retrain my thought patterns. Or the thought patterns have shifted without me or despite me. I don't want to advance in my career, write a better resume. I don't care so much about what other people think. It's okay to have little ambition, or a different kind of ambition. Bottom line: this is the year I will retire from the working world. I may do some things on my own, but I will stop reporting in to other people or punching a clock. I'm just working my way up to it. I don't want to be like the friend who retired at age 62, still in good health, and drawing a really nice pay check, only to say, "Now I wait to die." I'm not going to be that caught up in my work, so it won't be a shock in my life style. |
| Well, the month is almost over and I'm finally getting into the New Year. The last of the Christmas things went into the attic just an hour ago! I made some headway this week on last week's goals! I am making progress. I suppose it helps that I'm breathing better than the first week of January. My cold is almost gone. I'm on my second round of antibiotics to clear my throat and stop the cough. I thought I was getting better, but my eyes got weepy during the night and the cough kept me awake again. This crud won't leave, yet I still feel so much better than I did for a few weeks during and after the holidays. I can't sing, and sometimes can't talk, but I can run a vacuum and change beds again. Whew. Being ill kills your enthusiasm and resolve. However, once you regain control somewhat, you can get back on the right path. I've paid my bills, got some paperwork done, and did some dusting. (I hate housework, but it won't go away.) I'm trying to plan a mini-vacation on which I can take my dad, who can't sit in the car all day, and can't walk a lot, but wants variety, too. It is a new year and time both of us did something different. Life is too short to stay home and work all the time. I would tell young people, "Get out and see the world now, before you have too many responsibilities." When you're older, you have obligations to others, you may have health problems, or you may have unforeseen burdens. If you wait to travel or have fun, it might not be possible. Some people do manage after 50 to do what they want, to benefit from their labor. But there is no guarantee that it will work that way. I am ready to make this a brand new year. I'll redecorate if I can. I'll do whatever it takes to shake things up. I'll write and I'll read and I'll travel as far as I can. It's going to be different one way or another! b |
| We finally have a new calendar on the kitchen wall. Usually we have lots of freebees, but we had to buy one this year. On this calendar, we primarily mark my dad's doctor appointments, which I also have on Google, his grandchildren's birthdays and other significant days to him. I have to keep my things, with his, on my own calendar. The Christmas tree is down. but the boxes are still in the family room. This room where I'm typing is full of Christmas boxes, too. They have to go into the attic. Only the outside lights are stored away until next year. We're just too sick still to climb into the attic toting heavy boxes. And it's cold up there. I still have Christmas cookies and fudge in the refrigerator. We can't use all that sugar, and I didn't go back to work after Christmas to take them. The fudge might still be okay to my co-workers, but I'm not so sure about the cookies. I want a vacation. I have to finish the holiday storage, go to the dentist and do my medical things, and dad's medical things. But I want a trip! I have to figure something that doesn't involve him flying, riding for more than six hours a day, or walking a great deal. So he is not really into sightseeing any more. He may have to scrap his dignity and settle for a wheel chair for day trips. I can't go anywhere without him. Maybe if I can find some place nice and scenic, he can endure a long ride, then just relax in the same place for a few days. Something lazy.I'm ready to start packing. I'm ready and willing to black off a week on that calendar. |
| I'm making progress. Two weeks of illness, but I can almost breathe normally. My eyes are clear and don't hurt. I still can't talk and have an "injured" throat. I cough a little less, but still too much, which keeps my throat and esophagus hurting and my voice barely audible. I'm finally able to concentrate enough to read. I can sweep the floor without major coughing spells. We measure progress in these little ways. My boss has been very understanding and gave me some extra time off to recover my lung strength. My father is perking up a little. Chicken noodle soup really does seem to help. 'm starting to think about organizing (isn't that the usual January activity?) and setting some new goals, not resolutions. I just sort of missed all that holiday stuff. When I know I'm germ free, I may try some new recipes. |
| 2016 definitely ends up with a sizzle, but not in the good sense. It just feels like I've been in a frying pan. Ouch. I ended up the year with pink eye! Never had if before. In all my many decades, never had it. But I got it pretty good, pretty fast. In less than 24 hours of the first symptom,my eye, according to the doctor, was lit up like a satellite in space. Of course, it hurts more in adults. It's a bloody mess, yes, but I didn't see anything on the Web as bad as what I saw in my mirror. In my 10X magnifying mirror, I saw 3 colors of pus oozing out, and in several shapes. Poke gently on the lower lid, and a whole block of white could suddenly appear on the eyeball. Some were flat like sheets of paper. Some hung like rectangles off the lashes. There were balls and cubes and cylinders. There there was this solid white goop than hung over my lashes like s a spider web. I was careful because I know it's contagious and can spread. I managed to keep the second eye clear. Looking like a cast member of The Walking Dead, pink eye wasn't my only reason to stay home. I had laryngitis, sinusitis, a cough that would scare the most fool-hearty person, and generally felt like a zombie or how we perceive a zombie must feel. And it turns out my trouble breathing wasn't just the coughing. I was starting pneumonia. Buzz kill. Then it was Dad's turn. I wasn't really up to leaving the house for any reason, but I had to take my big baby to the doctor. By the time he agreed to go, he was feverish and dehydrated. Which means he was out of his mind confused. I had to call for reinforcements. It took 3 of us to get him ready, to convince him it was 3 in the afternoon, not 7 at night Getting him out in the day light sort of helped his mind. Getting some Tylenol and water into him helped more. His blood pressure was extremely low. He was treated with steroids for his lung, an inhaler, and an antibiotic.Now I'm watching over him, forcing him to eat meals on time, and drink all his water. I even fixed him orange Jello; he likes it, he doesn't think of it as nursing home food. That was difficult for all of us to see, but it signaled a change in our relationship. He is truly my responsibility, and I have become his guardian.I can no longer ask if he wants a doctor. I will tell him. When he tells me he's not hungry, I will make him eat something anyway. The self side of this is that the outing seemed to have seriously set back my own recovery. I was left exhausted and my symptoms have risen up again. I'm dreading going back to work, but I have to eventually. Tomorrow is as good as any. As for New Year's Eve, I will watch TV and go to bed soon after, Now that's a sizzle. |
| Most days at work are pretty boring, at best, horrendous at other times. The public is not nice and polite. The charming people, the ones who smile and use nice manners, are the exception. It's easy to take care of them, and we usually go out of our way to do nice things for them. People who demand favors and treat you, the clerk-whether government, service, or retail, as beneath them, are the ones who only get favors when they are rude and ugly. No one volunteers to do them any favors. Recently, I have noticed that when I'm working with a good team, it becomes more bearable. We laugh about the bad folks together. We help each other out. I've got a large group of employees, but there are certain ones I prefer to work with, from all age groups and walks of life. We have a closing team, where the manager is the age to have been one of my children. there are two sub-managers, one who could be my grandson, and another woman about my age. We all have codes to solve problems with guests and keep the money and books straight. We work well together, but haven't been put all together at once so often before the seasonal rush. We have one part-time guy who only comes in late, but will stay until we're ready to shut down for the night, even if it's after midnight. He's mellow like me, and about the same age, and very efficient. He only tidies up and restores the look of the place. We make a great closing team, and it doesn't matter who the seasonal people are who work with us, or how many teenagers who have to leave by ten. Friday, we were super busy. No one was in charge of the front-end (cash out), so they put me there. (I get no credit or pay for it.) Two guys were trying to help out with whatever was necessary. The three of us were all over 50, still learning new things and helping each other. The seasonal help relied on us. The customers relied on us. The phones were being answered by me. We actually had fun. We ran our butts off, cleaning, stocking, holding employee and customer hands, and running registers ourselves when necessary. I wouldn't want to work at that pace or that stress level every day, but we discovered that the three of us made a winning combination. We didn't need anyone else to solve problems or handle guests. It was very smooth. When the guy in charge showed up, it went smoothly for him, and we all continued to work as a team. We have a long list of employees today. Some of the seasonal people have already been fired and replaced. We're still hiring, just for the next two weeks! Some of them will not be around the day after Christmas. I already know a few I hope get to stay, but most won't be missed. Some of the regular, despite their knowledge, I wouldn't mind replacing. Some of them are just easier to work with. The right grouping puts good personalities together, with a desire to do quality work. Those shifts are good ones to do. Working with people who want to do a good job makes a big difference, as opposed to people who don't care. |
| Whew! Can't believe it's December. I still don't have my monitor replaced, so I'm operating from a laptop, which is not my forte. I feel like all I do is work, which is stressful this time of year. I've been told I'm rude, stupid, and other things. I try to make everyone happy and give them what they want, but you can't please everyone. I bought a present for a kid my neighborhood association adopted, along with several families from our vicinity. I never got it wrapped and delivered to the right place by the deadline! And it wasn't a cheap gift. I hate to be one of those awful people returning things. It seems like I'm running late on everything. I haven't been writing anything. Doing this is taking away from my housecleaning time before I run out to work. We've had several special called business meetings at church concerning a potential land deal. I'm an officer, so I have to be there, and do a lot of follow-up. Those men have no idea that this is a terrible time of year to be doing those things. There's also lots of projects there. Thank goodness our choir is small, so we aren't doing anything special with that. I'm also thinking I need to quit work to spend more time cleaning up after my dad. I already go to all his doctor appointments, which are many. I took him shopping which took forever and we didn't get much. He's rearranged the furniture, which looks terrible. He rearranges the refrigerator in ridiculous ways. I don't want anyone I know who isn't related to me to come to the house. My hours will automatically cut back after Christmas, but I don't know if I can make it that long. Time is relative, so I'm told. The older you are the faster it goes. I'm pretty old, I guess. Christmas will not be spectacular this year. It's a matter of just surviving it. So I'm feeling old, rushed, and inundated with responsibility. Not much Christmas spirit there, no matter how much charity you do. I'm holding my breath, so to speak, until January with the promise of new beginnings. |
| If you're like me, you're tired already and Turkey Day isn't quite here. I'll be up early preparing for company, serve, clean up, and change to go to work for an 8 hour shift. That's hard for an old lady. I get about 4 hours of sleep, before showering and going back into work for an early shift Friday. I'm not doing anything Friday evening but sleeping. Saturday morning will be a lazy one. I work a late shift Saturday. There is a lot of food at my house. My boss will be working late tonight, until the wee morning hours. He told me he'll go home, walk the dog, sleep, get up, eat cereal and come back to work. I don't know if he was trying to get sympathy or what. His kids are in another city. He won't be seeing his mother or his girlfriend who has her own family to visit. He thinks it's because of his job. I think it's from life choices he's made. But I can't say that out loud. And I will take him a plate or two of food--cold things on one plate, things to heat on another. Not to kiss up, but because it's the right thing to do. HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE! I hope that no matter what your life choices have been, that you will have someone with whom to share a few special moments and a smile. |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
. Isn't it funny how we take things like electricity and plumbing for granted... until we don't have them. Happy for you!
