"No fucking way," you said.
"Way," smiled Ted as he sat back in marvel at the big black machine taking up an entire corner of his room. You practically fell on your knees at the sight of the device. Being an engineer, you would have pissed yourself.
"You bought a fucking 3D printer! Dude!"
You gave the taller Ted a high five. He smacked your palm hard, and you could feel it sting. But you didn't care.
"Dude," you continued. "I've always wanted one of these!"
"You and me both, bro. You and me both."
"How?" you asked, looking over the printer and blinking several times to make sure it was real. "These things cost thousands of dollars! And you working as a pizza guy isn't going to cover it!"
"I'll admit, it wasn't cheap. But I found it for two hundred bucks at that weird pawn shop in downtown. The one with the creepy old lady who looks like the Wicked Witch of the West."
"Yeah, I've seen the place. Jesus, man, do you think it will work?"
"I hope so, or I'm going to be getting my fucking money back," he said as he strutted over to the machine and pressed a few buttons. "Now, how the hell do you work this thing?"
"Seriously? You call yourself an engineer. Out of the way."
You shoved the muscle head to the side to the side. While you had never seen a 3D printer up close before, you could tell that there was something strange about this machine. For starters, there were no USB ports to plug in a computer or other external devices. There were a handful of button, two big ones being Scan and Cancel. The others looked like a standard keyboard. There was also a large tray that could only be described as a copy machine and a monitor for displaying the to-be-printed 3D object.
"I...Uh...," you shrugged. "Have you tried turning it off and on, again?"
"Real fucking funny, wise guy. It looks like there's some sort of scanner on this thing."
"Yeah..."
"Maybe...We have to, uh, scan something?"
You could literally feel yourself losing IQ by talking with Ted. You glanced around Ted's room for what little there was around. "Do you have like a paper or something we could test this thing with?"
"Yeah, hang on."
Ted waddled to a nearby table and grabbed a picture frame of you and Ted, as well as three girls. You were all at the freshman fair at the start of college, just hanging out and enjoying the carnival. You recognized them at a glance. Kim, your roommate, Pat, her bestie, and Lisa, your boss.
"Wonder how this will work," Ted placed the paper down and hit the green Scan button.
The machine hummed to life as a light scanned the photograph. There was some worrisome beeping as an image came up on the screen of the attached monitor. You squinted and saw a 3D image of a human body slowly being formed with wire frames. The shape was distinctively female, but you couldn't quite tell who it was. As more details appeared on the body, you quickly realized that it was a 3D model of...
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