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 |   My 2nd blog. My spot for sharing my life, music, and writing with my friends. |
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Hello, Hello. Fancy seeing you here. I'll work on making this nice and pretty later. *  I also have a poetry blog, for those who dig poetry:
AND I have a mental health group with a monthly challenge:
[Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lay my hands on Heaven and the sun and the moon and the stars While the devil wants to fuck me in the back of his car ♡ * I will never make this pretty. |
Maaaaaan, I'm so fucking sick. Just a PSA: If your doctor ever tries to put you on Effexor, say no to that shit. The withdrawal is pure hell. Nausea, vomiting, headaches, dizziness, insomnia, muscle aches, brain zaps... Just awful. And I'm weaning too. I didn't even stop cold turkey. I'm on Day 4 of this. It's like the worst flu. Plus I have to go to class in 10 minutes. Fuck me, man. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Prompt: Your boss has to fire half of your team. Why should he/she keep you? Why should he/she fire you? Have you ever volunteered to take a lay-off so one of your co-workers does not lose their job? He should keep me because I've worked here longer than most of the other people and I'm consistent as fuck. If I was a boss, that would be one of the main things I looked for in an employee. I hate working with people that are inconsistent. Like, sometimes their shit is on point and then two days later, they're producing complete shit or not showing up at all. Consistency is totally underrated in the job market. I might not be the most socially acceptable, but I am consistent. He should fire me because consistency is all I have going for me.  I'm seriously just doing this job because I'm in college and it pays well enough that I can't quit. The second I'm able to quit, I'm going to, probably without notice too. I'm just going to drop all my accounts in the middle of them. Peace, motherfuckers!I haven't ever been at a company where there were major lay-offs. If I was, it would all depend on my situation and the other employee's situation. Like, if I knew I could get another job a lot easier than they could and I kinda hated the current job anyway, I might be willing to take the lay-off so that someone else could not lose their job. If I needed the job though, I definitely wouldn't take the lay-off because we all need to look out for ourselves sometimes. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** "If I have to hear this song one more time, I'll kill myself." A customer within earshot glares in your direction as you pretend to hang yourself with an Xbox power cord. "I dunno, it's not that bad," Ashley says. "Not that bad? It wasn't that bad 6 months ago." A customer comes up with a armful of DVDS and throws them down on the glass counter. "Which of these are good?" You and Ashley look at each other. She calls smoke break before you can and heads out the back door a few feet away. Ashley doesn't even smoke and still calls smoke breaks when an annoying customer pops up. You look at the movies scattered on the counter. Just Like Heaven, 300, Green Lantern, The Switch, The Unborn What is the fucking theme here? "300 is pretty good..." The guy crosses his arms. "And the others?" "Eh, not so much." "Not so much? What does that mean?" "It means I haven't seen them," you reply. He scoffs and a line starts forming behind him. "Do you not work here?" You laugh. "Yeah, man, I work here. All the time. That's why I don't have the opportunity to watch a lot of movies." This must have been the wrong response because he starts demanding to speak to a manager and can't seem to understand the concept of a manager not being on shift until 3 o'clock. You tell him about IMDB as the woman behind him sings the song to herself behind him. Insanity, indeed. You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness Like resignation to the end, always the end |
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Prompt: You finally landed your dream job, You drop everything you were doing and change career directions immediately, to become...trash collector. Tell us about your first day on the job. Wait... So, I landed my dream job as a trash collector or I landed my dream job and then immediately quit to become a trash collector? Why would I do that? Hmm, I just can't imagine ever being a trash collector. I don't even like washing dishes because it grosses me out. I'm a princess when it comes to getting dirty. Everything grosses me out and I have to wash my hands like a million times a day. My first day of being a trash collector would definitely be my last day of being a trash collector, too. Unless I had those super fancy trucks that picks the trash up with a claw and I didn't have to get out of the truck at all. Otherwise, that would probably be one of the worst jobs in the world. I mean, lifting heavy, dirty stuff all day? No thanks. Day one of trash collection: Me: Do we have any more hand sanitizer? Boss: You need to bring it from home, pansy. Me: I quit. The end. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** The ride to the hospital has two music options. 1) a mix cd with P!nk and Kid Rock OR 2) a mix cd with 70s and 80s music. The decision isn't hard, even though Ma plays pretty much the same Clash track all the way to work and back. It's a 45 minute drive each way to the hospital where she got you a job as soon as you dropped out of school. She works in the quality improvement department upstairs on the business floor. They don't have to deal with anything gross up there. In two months, you've been sick four times. Stomach flus, common colds, viruses and pathogens everywhere. You get the delight of working in the most depressing unit of the hospital- ICU. Here, people are experiencing the worst moments of their lives. Loved ones being kept alive by life support while they make grueling decisions about when to give in and pull the plug. Your job is to be the middle man between hospital staff and family members. They don't tell you when you're hired, but the main reason you're sat at a desk at the head of the room is so you can keep an eye on everyone and call security if a fight breaks out. "These are very delicate times. Emotions are running high," the 70-year-old man who trained you explained. He was working as a volunteer while you got paid. Fucking politics. For an hour and a half each day, it's just you and Ma, talking about music or the guy who coded in the lobby or whatever. And in between, there is the rollercoaster of pulling through and not making it. Sometimes when this place gets kind of empty Sound of their breath fades with the light I think about the loveless fascination Under the Milky Way tonight |
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Prompt: It's Groundhog Day It's a North American tradition; A celebration of winter; It's about the weather, and a yearning for spring; It's science; It's a bunch of hoo ha! What's your take on Groundhog Day, and the weather in general? They say that, "Everyone talks about the weather, but nobody ever does anything about it." What little secrets or inventions do you have to help you cope with inclement weather? Well, I liked the movie... Honestly, everyone knows that Groundhog Day isn't like a 'real' thing. It's just something that's tradition, so now we do it and, like, 95 percent of people probably don't pay attention to it. I literally couldn't tell you if the groundhog saw his shadow last year, or any year. In fact, the groundhog could easily not even exist and I would be none the wiser. Is this something they air on television or something? I got an electric blanket for Christmas a couple years and I'm basically glued to it from November until April. I never realized how much a needed heat applied directly to my body 24/7 until I got a heated blanket. I didn't invent it or anything, but if you live in a crazy cold climate like we do in the Midwest, I'd totally recommend getting one. Other than that, the only advice that any winter sufferer could give you is to always stock up on things like water and canned food. You never know when you're going to get snowed in for a few days and it sucks dick when you don't have anything to eat. I mean, the roads get cleared pretty fast around here, but only the major ones. The side roads are sheets of ice for days when there's a bad winter storm, so if you're brave enough to venture out... get me some soup. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Ma makes a big production of making sure that you're aware that Uncle Kurt is not actually you're uncle before she drops you off with your cousins. There's a difference between relation by blood and by marriage and it's important that you understand that her sister is just a complete fuck up. But, most importantly, Uncle Kurt is not really your uncle. Don't listen to anything he says. By now, you know why you're getting this speech. Uncle Kurt mixes lemonade with vodka and 'finds' lost treasures in 'dumpsters'. You promise to not forget that Uncle Kurt is in fact not your uncle before climbing out of the passenger seat, dragging your backpack out with you. Dad says that Uncle Kurt and Aunt Terri are the most unlucky couple in the world because they accidentally had six kids in a row and the last three homes they've rented have been haunted, even the new build above the barber shop in town. It's only 3 in the afternoon, but Uncle Kurt is a special brand of fucked up today and screams at you the second you walk in. "You have to go to the right, Charlie. The right." He comes over to demonstrate the difference between stumbling left into the dining room and stumbling right into the living room. You'd like to just stumble up the stairs where your cousin's probably already playing video games. Resigned, you sigh. There is no option but to play along. "So, to get up the stairs...?" Uncle Kurt looks at you as if you're psychotic. "You have to go around, man. You have to go right when you walk in." You clear your throat. "Right, um, so... I go in a circle around the house, and, uh... And then come back to where I'm standing right now and go up the stairs?" "You have to." He chugs straight from a paper bag. "You have to, man." You don't bother to ask, but of course he follows and tells you anyway. "The entities, Charlie. We talked to, uh, the... On Sunday.. we talked to--" "The priest." He snaps his fingers. "Yeah, man. We talked to the priest. We talked to him on Sunday. The entities, they might belevolent." "Malevolent?" You make it back around to the front door. "Alright, I can go up the stairs now?" "Did I ever tell you the story about the witch under the bridge?" "Like, a million times, Uncle Kurt." "Hey, you wanna help me get some money?" He looks around in paranoia. "Maybe later. But, hey, are the evil ghosts cool with me going upstairs now?" He stares blankly at you for far too long. "What? Oh, yeah... I think you're cool now." Goin' up to the spirit in the sky That's where I'm gonna go when I die When I die and they lay me to rest Gonna go to the place that's the best |
Welllll, hey guys! I hope you're all doing well. I know I've been super absent the last... few months. In fact, I've only written 2 blog entries since October 2015.  I bet you thought you'd never see the day, eh? So, the good news is that I'm going to make an attempt at blogging every day this month for "The Soundtrack of Your Life"  and "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" .Between work, school, and chronic migraines... we'll see how it goes.  Trying not to pressure myself into getting back into things too quickly, but I kind of just jumped in headfirst. I even signed up for "Give It 100!" again. I have no idea how I'm going to manage that, but feel free to watch me try 100 poems in 100 days over at "Invalid Item" I should probably apologize for being so out of the loop on everything and just sort of disappearing, but... let's not make a big thing of it, yeah? Instead, I'll just get started on the 30DBC prompt and hopefully, somehow, I will get my groove back. How Charlie Got His Groove Back?  ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Prompt: You've gathered a small group of the favorite people in your life together, (Your closest family members and most beloved friends.) You've finally been able to gather them all together, and treat them to a meal at your favorite restaurant, (The restaurant you've raved about to them for the past many years.) When you all arrive at the restaurant you're horrified to discover that ... ... ... I'm horrified to discover that... the place has closed. Okay, sounds boring, right? Hear me out and then judge. First, you should know that I'm one of those people that won't even SUGGEST something to do, because I'm too afraid something will go wrong and then it will somehow be my fault. I have no idea when or how that started, but I don't remember ever NOT being like that. For example, if someone wants me to choose a restaurant, I just won't. I just say that I don't care, and I really don't care. Why? It's like I'm afraid that if I choose X restaurant to the west instead of Y restaurant to the east, we'll get into a horrific car accident and the person I'm with will get killed and then for the rest of my life, I'll be like, Why oh why, god. Why didn't I just choose Y restaurant to the east instead of X restaurant to the west?!" Before you start lecturing me, I'm super aware that this is no way to live, but it's my life and I'll live it how I want god damn it. So, that's an extreme example, yeah? Here's a much more common thought: X, Y, and Z movies are all playing at different times. I choose Z, the latest movie playing. We get to the theatre and then find out that Z movie isn't going to be playing because someone accidentally pooped in the pool. (Whatever, I can't think of why the movie wouldn't be playing) Basically, the point is, I've ruined the whole moviegoing experience because Z movie isn't going to play for whatever reason.  I almost think the major problem is that I care about so little in terms of what I'm doing, where I'm going, what I'm eating, etc... Like, I couldn't care less. BUT, if I do choose and then something goes wrong, everyone's all, like, sympathetic. "Aw, poor, Char. You had your heart set on that." And then, I'm almost embarrassed, because I totally didn't have my heart set on that. You just forced me to choose and it ended up not happening, but I'm totally okay with that. I just don't care and I never did. When I read this prompt, that was the first thought I had. Oh god, what if I had talked about this restaurant for years and how good it is and then we all piled into each other's cars and went there only to find out that it was, um, closed. I swear, I'm getting shivers just from thinking about it. Like, my face is literally flushed thinking about it. I have to move onto something else because that's how much it bothers me. Oh god, what if everyone got food poisoning? No no no. I'm done. I bet you wish you hadn't asked, huh?  ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Friday nights are reserved for 80s music and neon, off-the-shoulder tops. All the girls wear mismatched socks halfway to their knees and side ponytails, diligently crimped to perfection. Chelsea points out the "House Rules" painted on the back wall and shouts over the music, "What the fuck is a dungaree?" You try to say something like, "I think they're overalls," but she interrupts by pointing out another house rule: All clothes must be checked. "That means we have to skate naked, you know," Jimmy says and you cringe at the perviness as he wraps his arm around her waist while she twists away, and skates toward the rink. He informs you that she's just playing hard to get and you raise your eyebrows and nod. Sure she is. Noah is out on the floor, colorful lights flashing around him as he leans against the sides and talks to a girl that you recognize from your freshman english class. After a brief internal struggle, you decide not to inform him that she's, like, fourteen years old. Hannah zips by, grabbing your arm and screaming about how much she loves the song. It's a familiar one with a chorus that can get stuck in your head for days. You've skated in circles to it probably about a million times. Out on the floor, she laces her arm in yours and skates lazy 8s while talking about some guy from her philosophy class that is supposedly deeper than a well, but sounds shallow as a puddle. Two guys in the grade above yours start fighting in the middle of the floor as you skate around them, accidentally blocking the floor guard from breaking it up- twice. "They got into a fight at school too," you inform Hannah, and she feigns interest. "Yeah, it was pretty much just like this." "It's déjà vu all over again," she agrees and stares on as if she had been there. "You ever notice how there's always a fight here on Friday nights?" "At least one." "Why is that?" You shrug. You've never thought about it before. "What is a fight though, really?" you ask, mocking her philosophical crush. She unhooks her arms and pushes you, causing you to slip on the newly waxed floors. Sitting in the rink, you decide this is as good a place as any for a smoke break. You watch the floor guards walk the boxers out of the rink and stand by on watch as the change into their street shoes. It seems like the fight would continue in the parking lot after they're kicked out, but it won't. Who would be there to break it up? One of the floor guards comes over and says, "Hey kid, you know you can't smoke in here." You go through this routine every week, you and this same floor guard. "Come on, kid. Don't bust my balls, yeah? At least go outside." You reach out and he helps you off the ground. He doesn't care if you wear the skates out into the parking lot. He knows you won't steal them. And just as expected, the boxing champions have disappeared. Come on Eileen Oh, I swear (what he means) At this moment, you mean everything You in that dress, my thoughts I confess Verge on dirty Aah, come on Eileen |
| Hey everyone. I haven't updated my blog since before Halloween of last year, and I start classes again on Monday, so I thought I'd sneak in here and update you all a little bit about where I am when I'm not here. As most of you know, 2015 was a bit of a rough year for me and my family. I lost my grandmother very suddenly at the end of August, and while I've lost people before, it hasn't ever hit quite so hard. I think the fact that she practically raised me and the complete lack of foreshadowing caused a bit of a fallout in my mental health. I think everyone here can understand me when I say that I wish I could have just one more conversation with her. I’ve spent a lot of time dwelling on all the things I should have said when I said nothing. Anyone who has lost someone close to them will tell you that you always want that one last conversation with the knowledge of what’s about to happen. You want to wrap it up into a neat little package and say your thank yous and tie up all the loose knots. I don’t believe that I have a lot of good qualities, but the good qualities I do have, I attribute in large part to my grandmother because she was a very self-aware and good person on every level. The aftermath of her death has left a huge hole in my family and all the unresolved things of the past have boiled to the surface in her absence- proof once again that communication is extraordinarily important in life. If you have had the displeasure of talking to me in the past 5 months, I’m sure you’ve noticed a distinct change in my personality on a general level. Only a few of you have mentioned it, but trust that I’m aware of my complete lack of really feeling anything at this point. It was just kind of like a light switch turning off. Things I used to care about and be extremely emotional about have all but escaped me. I tried to fix the roboticness of the situation during the fall semester because it isn’t like me to have such a strong flat affect, but I wasn’t able to conjure up whatever it was that made me care about things. After a rough semester, I realized that I had two weeks left in school and was about to lose my 4.0 standing because I was having so much trouble concentrating. A month and a half of migraines left me in and out of doctors offices more times than I can count and most of the time I should have spent studying became ‘lay in the dark and stare at the wall’ time because it was all my head would allow for. I was able to pull off the straight-A semester, but at great cost of my work and personal relationships. During Christmas, we went out of town to visit family and that was a nice break. I spent most of the week feeling like I was forgetting to do something, even though the semester had officially ended the day before we left. As soon as we got back, it became apparent that we had picked up a cold virus on our travels and we’ve both been sick with that for over a week now. As I mentioned before, Monday marks the spring semester of school and I have a few tough classes on my plate. Because of that, I’ve had to scale things back here at WDC. Today is the last day I’ll be sending out the BCOF prompt because I’ve stepped down as assistant leader. As far as other things here, yeah, I don’t know… I did finish NaNo, but other than that, I’m just kind of out of it for now. I’m not into reviewing, or challenges, or writing. I’ll get back into it sometime, but it’s probably not going to be anytime soon. Anyway, this is basically just a quick update to let you know that if you’ve talked to me recently and I sounded like a robot- it’s because I am. *robot* Make love to me like you know I am better than the worst thing I ever did. Go slow. I’m new to this. But I have seen nearly every city from a rooftop without jumping. ~Buddy Wakefield |
Artist: Bad Suns Album: Language & Perspective Song: Cardiac Arrest [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm killin' these prompts like I'm paid to do it. WTMR : 20. What cheers you up when you're sad? If I find a cure for sadness, I'm going to be a super rich dude. I don't know what cheers me up when I'm sad, but I do know what DOES NOT cheer me up when I'm sad. I hate when people have 'solutions' for problems that they don't understand. "Oh, you have a migraine? Why don't you take some tylenol?"  "Oh, you have major depressive disorder? You should think positive!"Just, no. That would be like telling someone with Alzheimer's to just think harder or telling someone with allergies to try to think optimistically about pollen. I realize that people are just trying to help in their own way, but it's not really appropriate to offer advice for medical issues that you don't understand. I wouldn't offer advice for someone with tuberculosis because I have no experience with it, even though I did have a cough one time. So please, don't offer advice to people with depression because you were sad that time your dog died. As far as dealing with sadness, I just take it a day at a time. If it's worse, I take it an hour at a time. If it's the worst, I take it a minute at a time. That's all you can be reasonably expected to do. If I'm sad over something normal, like losing a family member, I allow myself to follow the grieving process and don't try to hide how I feel. Sometimes there's nothing wrong with being sad. WTMR : 21. Tell us about a first day. First day at school, at Writing.com, at a new job, as a parent... I'll talk about my first day working in a major city, because it was kind of funny. People in cities move a lot faster than they do in small towns. You can look at it in a negative or positive way, because it's sorta both. On one hand, people in cities seem smart and productive because they're faster. On the other hand, people in cities don't seem to take the time to enjoy much because they're rushing around like chickens with their heads cut off. Anyway, I was working in this cafe/hookah bar and it was so slow. I remember watching people going by outside and none of them were stepping foot into the cafe. I spent most of the day just sitting on the counter drinking coffee because it was a privately-owned business and it was just me and one other employee there. We got a little busy around 5 or 6 o'clock as people got off work and wanted coffee for the commute home or whatever. But at around 8 o'clock the place just went crazy. There were huge groups of people sitting together, smoking hookahs and ordering drink after drink, like straight shots of espresso. I started falling behind on my tables fairly quickly because it was my first day and I had no idea what I was doing. After about 45 minutes of this, I really needed a smoke break, but we were so busy that I knew it would be impossible to get it approved by the owner, who was now inside sitting down with a group of like ten of his friends. So, instead of asking, I just went out back and sat down on a milk crate in the alley and lit up. I had been smoking for a couple minutes when I saw something move in my peripheral right next to me. It was dark out, so I jumped up thinking it was a raccoon or something like that. Nope, homeless guy. The guy starts saying something to me, I think asking to bum a cig, right as the owner opened up the back door and shouted into the alley, "Kid, what the fuck are you doin' out here? Get your ass to work." I always remember that because I was so completely out of my element in the situation. Everything was moving so fast that I couldn't really keep up with it. I'm not like that anymore because I've lived in the city so long now. When I go to smaller towns now, I can't help but think, Christ, why is everyone moving in slow motion? It's crazy how perspectives change over time. WTMR : 22. Many people associate smells with memories. Tell us about one smell that triggers a memory in you. Who or what does it remind you of, and why? Lilac reminds me of my grandmother. She really liked the smell of lilac and lavender and her favorite color was that light, pastel purple. Also lemongrass because I think her soap was always lemongrass scented. I was somewhere recently and there was lemongrass soap. I could hardly use it because it reminded me of her and it made me sad, but I still used it because it's gross to not wash your hands. I get really attached to the scent of people's cologne or perfume. I had a friend growing up who always wore the exact same perfume. It was her favorite kind. I was in a big crowd several years after I last saw her and I smelled the perfume. I couldn't remember at first where I knew the scent from, but then I realized that it was from her. I don't know why, but I looked for her in the crowd because I thought that she might be there, as if she was the only person in the world to use that perfume. I was also across the country from where I had known her, so the odds were so slim. Of course, I didn't find her there because she wasn't there. I still remember the scent though and if I smelled that perfume again, I would think of her. I kind of like when someone has that, like a signature perfume or cologne that they use because it always reminds me of them later on. A lot of the girls I've known have used vanilla perfume. I really love the scent of vanilla. WTMR : 23. Tell us about a time when you quit. Oh, yes, I quit high school. That was a fun day. I can't remember now why I wanted to quit so badly, but I simply gave up. I had a high GPA and the classes were easy peas, but I just couldn't stand it a moment longer. I didn't even really think about it at the time. It just seemed like the natural course for things to run for some reason. The funniest part was that I had to return all of the books to my teachers, but some of them wouldn't accept the book... they wouldn't sign off that I had returned it. My English teacher especially didn't want to sign off on it. She said, "you can't just drop out of school! What are you going to do?" It was funny because I kept trying to give her the textbook and she kept pushing it away, so I finally just put it on her desk and then she picked it up and put it on my backpack. I picked it back up to put on her desk and she blocked me from doing it. It had to be a funny scene, really, in retrospect. At the time, I was just annoyed because she was like the 4th teacher I had gone through that with and I just wanted her to take the stupid book and sign off on it. I finally told her that I was dropping out whether she signed off on the book or not, so she could do what she wanted with it. I started to walk out of the room and she said right before I left, "But, what about the poetry presentation?" She sounded so sad when she said it too that I kind of felt bad, but I also didn't because I just wanted to get the hell out of there. WTMR : 24. What sort of people do you tend to connect well with and/or choose as friends? Men? Women? Older? Younger? Outgoing? Introverted? Geeky? Cool? Honestly, it would be faster for me to talk about the type of people that I don't connect well with because I do connect well with so many different types of people. I typically don't like people who are around my age, but a bit younger than me. I don't know why, but I have trouble connecting with the 17-21 range. After that, they seem to mature a little bit more and I can get along with them decently enough. I get along with people who are older than me quite well. People who are 30+ I seem to have a quick connection to when I meet them. I'm sure there's a cutoff for that though. Maybe people who are like 30-55 I connect with easily and nearly instantly when I meet them. Babies, I don't really connect to well. Like, young children. I dunno. I don't really like kids. Elderly people, well, it just depends there on how crabby they are that day and how crabby I am that day. At school, I get along with a lot of my female classmates, but I get along with the guys too. Gender doesn't really seem to have any impact on whether or not I'm going to like somebody, to be honest. Same with introvert v. extrovert. I have both qualities depending on my mood, so I can easily relate to either one. I like to talk to introverts and kind of break their shells down a little bit because they usually have interesting things to say when they do start talking. Most of all, I'll typically get along with anyone who isn't super obnoxious and egotistical. I hate that so much when someone is 'humblebragging' about how cool they are and you just want to be like, ugh... stop. I also won't get along with anyone who puts someone else down. If I see someone putting another person down, I instantly don't like them and it's doubtful that I ever will unless I see something that shows me why they would feel the need to treat someone like that, or if I see them change in a major way.Other than loud, entitled people, I can get along with damn near anyone. If I'm around someone for long enough, I start to care about them anyway on a human-to-human level. I don't want anything bad to happen to them and that usually leads to a connection of some sort. WTMR : 25. Tell us about a cause you're passionate about. In case you haven't noticed, I am EXTREMELY passionate about the mental health cause, like the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). I think that it's disgusting how people with mental illness are treated in our society and the way that mentally ill people are pushed under the rug. There is a stain and a stigma that goes along with having a mental illness that isn't fair to the sufferers, who are often good people just trying to live the best they can. You don't see people with heart disease, cancer, or diabetes being put down the way that mentally ill individuals are put down. For the inexperienced, they don't see mental illness as a 'legitimate' problem because they think they understand it far less than they actually do. They think about how they get anxious before an interview, but they power through it anyway and they think, if I can do it, anyone can do it. They don't understand the differences between healthy, natural anxiety and the debilitating anxiety that millions of people suffer for no apparent reason every single day. They think, oh, I was so depressed after my last break up, but I just got a haircut and started exercising and eating healthier. I cured my depression and anyone who doesn't do the same is being lazy. They don't understand the people with major depressive disorder who are simply disappointed to wake up some mornings for no apparent reason. They don't get what it's like to not be able to get out of bed, or to eat, or to even bathe because you feel so entirely empty and hopeless that you have no energy, interest, or focus to literally even stand up. I'm a huge advocate for mental illness treatment. I think that talking about mental illness should be the same as talking about any other medical condition, like diabetes or cancer. I think that the more we talk about mental illness, the less ashamed sufferers will feel and the more likely they'll be to get the medical help that they need before they hurt themselves or other people. It's an important cause that more people should get behind. I’ve been tryin’ to keep my grip Yeah I think I’m over this |
Artist: Banks Album: Goddess Song: Waiting Game [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm definitely going to push it with 6 prompts for this entry, but I've not had much time to blog all month, so stay with me. Just find a prompt that sounds interesting and read that part or something. I promise I won't be offended.  WTMR : 9. Tell us about a book you read recently. Was it good? Bad? Tell us YOUR reaction to it. I actually read a book when I couldn't sleep at night earlier this week. It was, fuck, trying to think of the name of it. It was by David Levithan. It was The Lover's Dictionary. It was a super quick read because it's just that kind of book. He wrote it in 2 weeks and it's just written in like dictionary form, alphabetical order with one word per entry and it tells the story of a relationship. I don't know exactly how to explain it, but here's one of the first entries: abstain, v. I’m sorry I was so surprised that night you didn’t drink. “Is something wrong?” I asked. It wasn’t like you to turn down a drink after work. “You go ahead,” you said. “You drink for both of us.” So I ordered two Manhattans. I didn’t know whether to offer you a sip. I didn’t know if it could be this easy to get you, for once, to stop. “What’s wrong?” I asked. After a dramatic pause, you said, totally serious, “I’m pregnant.” And then you cracked up. I laughed even though I didn’t feel like laughing. I raised my Manhattan, tipped it a little in your direction, then asked, “Who’s is it?” So, it's basically like that all the way through the alphabet. I don't know about you guys, but sometimes I can totally get into a 200-300 page book that has no real purpose and that I definitely never had any intention of reading. It just sort of shows up and I think, why not? It seems like it happens a lot with YA books because they're so easy to read, but this book was apparently an adult book instead of YA, his first, in fact. I thought it was decent. It was probably fun to write up on the fly and if you know anything about my blog, I could probably do this fairly quickly with different words and all that. Those little vignettes are a lot of fun to write and they're fairly fun to read too. I can't imagine they're as fun to read as they are to write though, at least not for me. There were a couple parts in the book where I wanted it to have a little more punch, just be a little darker or something, I don't know. I have that reaction sometimes and then I have to remind myself that if I want to read something dark, I should write something dark. Yeah, it was a fun three-hour read. WTMR : 12. What's your opinion of Halloween? If you've ever had an interesting Halloween experience, share it. Halloween is probably my favorite holiday that you don't actually get off work for, so it's not technically a holiday to a lot of people. I love everything horror. I'm like, just horrify me. When someone's like, "do you want to hear something awful/crazy/scary?" I'm like, why yes, I do. If I watch a movie, it's usually a horror movie. Even comedy horror stuff is cool with me. One of my favorite Halloween movies is The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I only connect it that way because you can go see it in theater every Halloween and it's one of the best movies to see in person by far. The audience gets so involved in it. I love when they do the Rocky Horror Picture Show plays and everyone has rice and water pistols. A lot of that is banned in theaters now, but if you ever get a chance to do a participation showing, dooooo it! There are always Halloween parties and those are fun, especially when everyone dresses up and then gets so drunk that their costume start falling off in pieces and not making sense anymore. You know, like someone was a scarecrow at one point, but now they're just walking around in overalls? Like all their props are missing or something. One of my favorite Halloween memories is funny because it's not even entertaining or crazy or anything. I'm going to tell it anyway, because, prompt. I spent one Halloween in a super small town in the deep south. There was legit nothing going on for Halloween and it was kind of a bummer. I tried looking on the internet for a haunted house in the area and, lo and behold, there was ONE haunted house about twenty minutes away. We piled into the car and set out on the desolate road to find this haunted house. As we got nearer to the destination, someone commented about how there weren't any cars around. I think someone asked, "Are you sure it's still open?" Suddenly our GPS quips, "You have arrived at your destination!" We look out the window and there is the creepiest fucking house you could imagine. It was two-story Dutch Colonial with the creepy ass quarter-moon windows like they had on the Amityville Horror  house. It was old as fuck and the paint was chipping off the outside. The shutters were like, hanging off and covered in cobwebs.We all looked around the car at each other and then someone was like, "Holy fuck! It's an actually haunted house??" I swear, we laughed so hard. I thought we were going to, like, a setup haunted house with an admission price and staff that worked there. Nope. Just a creepy-ass house. WTMR : 13. Share with us a possession that has personal significance to you. Where did you get it? Why does it mean so much to you? I have a cross that my older brother gave to me and, even though I'm not religious anymore, it still has a personal significance to me. I wore it forever because it reminded me of him. After I wasn't around him and didn't see him anymore, I still wore it because it made me feel close to him and reminded me of him. I think I wore it every day for like 5 or 6 years. It was like a gold or silver cross either. It was a black cloth necklace with a black plastic cross. I can't tell you how many times people pointed it out when I was 16 or 17. They'd be like, "dude, you're religious?? I saw you snorting lines off a coffee table last week." And I'd have to explain that I wasn't religious, it was just a gift from my brother. And then they'd be all like, "what? you have a brother? is he dead?" I'll be the first to admit, I ended up taking it off eventually because I got sick of people asking me about it. I think because I was so incredibly anti-religious at the time that it just completely blew people's minds to see me take my shirt off and have a cross underneath. I got sick of answering questions about it, so I just took it off one day. Not after anything in particular either. I was just taking a shower or something, I think, and I saw it in the mirror. I realized that I hadn't taken it off before because, even though I wasn't religious anymore (or was trying desperately hard not to be), I was afraid that something bad would happen to me if I did take it off. Welcome to religion, folks. Anyway, I did end up taking it off, but I still have it tucked away in a box somewhere. I got a lot of use out of that old el cheapo necklace, but it was time to retire it. It got me through the times I was away from my siblings and now that we're all back living near each other, I can just call up my brother and see him when I want to instead of holding onto some cheap piece of cloth and plastic in the hopes that it'll bring me closer to him. WTMR : 17. What are your biggest pet peeves and/or soapbox topics? This is going to sound funny after what I was just talking about, but I absolutely cannot stand it when people feel the need to publically voice their viewpoints and beliefs. I hate when I'm out and I see people holding up anti-abortion signs or something like that. I'm a huge fan of 'you do what you want with your body and I'll do what I want with mine.' What I find hilarious is that a lot of anti-abortionists are Republicans and they don't want anyone to get abortions, but after the kid's born, they also want to cut back on welfare so that the kid can't eat. They essentially want the baby to be brought to full term and birthed so that they can starve it. Like, man, fuck that kid. So, that might be a bit dramatic, but it still makes me laugh to think about because it's sort of a legit way of looking at it. It's not just that though. It's everything in general. I don't need to know about your fucking religion while I'm sitting in class. I really don't. You're Catholic? That's fabulous. We had a kid during our introduction speech is my public speaking class go all Billy Mays on us, like pointing at himself and then us saying, "God saved ME and he saved YOU too." Bitch, shut up. If you want to be religious or anti-religious or for abortion or against abortion or for guns or against guns, that's totally cool with me. I just don't want to hear about it at times when it makes no sense. Like, when I'm sitting at the bus stop, you don't gotta tell me your political affiliation. Not only do I not care, but I also don't want to hear you talk about it. If I wanna hear you talk about it, I'll go to a designated area where people are peacefully protesting or I'll go read your internet blog about it. Don't tell the random kid at the bus stop that Obama is the devil or that 9/11 was an inside job. It should be illegal for solicitors of religious groups to knock on your door and convert you to their religion. What in the fuck? You think someone old enough to own a home or rent an apartment has never heard of Christianity? Like they're gonna open the door and be like, "Whoa, wow! This is a new and exciting group in which I'd love to take a part as I've never heard of it before today!" People should totally have opinions out the ass, but they shouldn't go to random people to share those opinions. As someone who apparently looks friendly enough to approach about anything, I don't care about how developed a fetus is at 8 weeks. If the mother wants an abortion, she should get one. Stop handing me literature about it. WTMR : 18. Share with us something that you're proud of. I actually have a lot to be proud of this week because I've managed to get a lot done despite being stupid busy and stressed out. I've been having headaches for weeks and can't seem to get a doctor's appointment at my usual office. It was midterms week and I managed to keep my A's in all my classes, even with having a headache every single day. I managed to get caught up with NaNo Prep and the 52 Week Fiction Image Contest. I've not been caught up with 52 week since the first week. I was always one behind because that was the maximum you were allowed to be behind. Of course I had to push it as much as possible. I'm so ready for NaNoWriMo to start. I've never written a novel or even attempted to, but I'm sick of prepping for it at this point. I just kinda wanna do it, ya know? I've also been working quite a bit. I'm still behind, as always, but I'm trying to make it work. OH, and I wrote a poem this week, which seems like it wouldn't be something to make a list of accomplishments, but it kind of does because I've not written any poetry in forever. Here it is: "Invalid Entry" So anyway, with all that put together, I think it's been a fairly productive week. I just need to put a little more work in, but I'm ready to do the second half of the semester and get to winter break. It's all about getting to the next break, haha. That's all I focus on.WTMR : 19. Tell us about a belief or opinion you've had that has changed as you've got older. I used to be a lot more fiscally liberal than I am now. I'm super socially liberal still, but I'm more fiscally conservative now. I'm basically a libertarian. I believe in a free market and I think welfare should be more restrictive. If you've read my response for prompt 17, you'll know that I can freely say this because I'm also pro-choice. It's not like I want to force people to have kids they can't afford and then I also don't want to have a ton of welfare. I know that the two are so intertwined that it's nearly impossible to separate them enough to actually be fiscally conservative and socially liberal, but in a perfect world, that's what I would be for. After being an independent contractor and having 30% of my income taken by the government, my views started to shift a little bit. I don't think people should be allowed to have six kids who are all on welfare. I don't think someone should be able to just live off of welfare indefinitely. I think there should be more of a push for those people who are able to work, but just don't want to, to better their lives. It's too easy to say, well, I get my groceries paid for, I get subsidized housing, I get X amount of money per kid back in taxes that I don't pay... I've known people who refuse to work because it would cut into their handouts. I've actually worked with people who were offered promotions and they turned them down because it would cut into their SSI. Why take on more responsibility at work when you can... not do that and still make the same amount of money that you would by taking the promotion? This is completely different than how I viewed things when I was younger. I thought that people should be given as much welfare as possible and that the poor should be taken care of completely. Now, I don't really think that way as much. I mean, I don't think there shouldn't be any welfare, but I think all of those programs should be finite. It shouldn't be like, "Ah, well, just keep having kids and we'll take care of it until the youngest turns 18." Welfare shouldn't be seen as an end-game; it should be a supplement while you get yourself back on your feet. Of course this doesn't apply to the truly disabled folks who literally cannot work. That should go without saying, but just adding that in there. What if I never even see you 'cause we're both on a stage? |
Artist: Jeff Buckley Album: Grace Song: Hallelujah [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm feeling a little bit better now, and by that I just mean that I'm not wallowing in self pity anymore. It's the small things that count. I'm not doing Soundtrackers right now, but has anyone done this song yet? If not... for shame. Jeff Buckley is dead af. Is it that the original artist has to be dead or the cover artist has to be dead? @Fivesixer  @Cinn  (P.S. I lost our IM, Ky.)I wrote a poem today. It's sad to me that it sounds like such a foreign thing at this point. Like, didn't I used to write a poem every day? Now it's been months? "Invalid Entry" I keep telling myself that I'll start working on "Invalid Item" prompts for the month, but it's the 20th and I don't see myself making any steps toward actually doing that. I'll try to just do a couple to get myself back on track or something.WTMR : 1. In your opinion, what tools and traits does a writer need in order to be good at their craft? I don't think writers need much at all in order to be good at writing. In fact, you don't even need pen and paper. I write all the time in my head while I'm driving or sitting in class or just laying in bed. It's a good idea to have pen and paper nearby to write down ideas, but sometimes I just like to let them flow in and ebb away. There's something natural about it. Not everything needs to be tied to a poem, after all. There's something about a writer who says, "I have to sit at this desk, in this time frame, with this method, and this sound coming from the speakers or I can't write at all." You mean you can't write in a crowded lecture hall? You can't write on the subway? It's so structured and... opposite of what I imagine when I think of writers. In my opinion, all you need is a muse. I'm not talking about a hot forest fairy nymph or anything like that. It just has to be something that sparks your creativity. For some people it's music or other people's writing. For me, it's life itself. Your life experiences can give you endless amounts of material if you use them the write way. It's all about perspective. Even a simple conversation can turn into a poem... or a stairwell banister . If you don't pick inspiration up where you can, it'll just pass you by.WTMR : 3. What do you think are the benefits of blogging, or writing in general? The benefit of blogging, for me, is that I can just let loose and talk. I don't have to worry about censoring myself or correcting what I've said. Sometimes things don't come out the right way. I'll come back read the entry later and think, That's not what I meant. Or, That wasn't received as intended. Sometimes things make sense in my head, but they sound trivial and silly when I actually write them down. Still, just the process of purging your thoughts can help reduce stress, even when they didn't come out the right way. Sometimes I just want to rant and I don't care if it's offensive or mean or if it's whiny and self-indulgent. I just want to scream on paper. After that, I'll usually feel better. When you can get a few people to read along and leave their thoughts, that helps too. Even if I disagree with what someone says, at least it's another point of view. With blogging, that's the worst case scenario... another point of view. Writing in general comes naturally to a writer. I mean, can you imagine just... not writing anything ever again? There are people who don't write. Actually, most people don't writing anything except the occasional work email or Facebook status update. If you're a writer, the thought of being confined to just those types of writing will make your throat tighten a little bit. It's suffocating for a writer to not write. That's why even when we have writer's block, we attempt to push through it. We don't just give up writing because it's something that will come about one way or another. Now or later. WTMR : 4. Things always look greener on the other side. Share the 'things no one told you', that you wish you'd known about something, eg. parenting, high school, leaving home, etc. Everyone always tell kids that life isn't fair. I think that's kind of bullshit. Not that life isn't fair, but that it's left just at that. No one ever tries to explain that to a kid. It's just, "Oh, you're complaining about something? Yeah, well, life isn't fair." It's so... depressing, when you think about it, to tell a young kid that things just suck sometimes and that's just the way it is for no other reason than being the way it is. They should at least be taught how to deal with it or how to make it better or something, Christ. Just, "yeah, it isn't fair and you'll live with it." It's true, of course, but it's not comforting. Then they grow up to be like me, looking around going, "Yes, I get that life isn't fair, but why the fuck shouldn't it be?" I mean, everyone should get theirs at some point, right? I feel like, "Life's not fair" is another way of saying, "I don't give a fuck about your problem." Sure, it's perhaps a bit more sympathetic, but the end result is the same, isn't it? In fact, I would rather people say that because at least it's honest. When I asked my brother how people go on with such sadness, he said that they do it with sadness. That's something I can get behind. Don't tell people that life isn't fair and leave it at that. Tell them that some shit sucks and some shit that sucks for them doesn't suck for you and some shit that sucks for you doesn't suck for them and you live with it by having days where you'd rather be dead; but you live with it. Well I heard there was a secret chord That David played and it pleased the Lord But you don't really care for music, do you? |
Artist: La Dispute Album: Somewhere at the Bottom of the River Between Vega and Altair Song: Andria [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm not sure how to start this entry. I've gotten so used to writing with prompts, but I need to blog without them today. I've been feeling so strange lately. I'm not sure when it started, but I think it may have started when I got back in school. I'm around a lot of people who are in my age range on a regular basis and they just seem so different than me. They all seem so full of energy and life. Their futures are bright and exciting. Mine doesn't feel that way. I feel tired. I feel worn out and I'm only 23. They seem... happy. I don't even feel like a person. I feel like the shell of a person, walking around mimicking people so I won't look out of place. I conform to whoever I'm with at the time and it's like I'm just miming their movements and their thought processes. When I'm alone, I have no idea how to act because I don't have anyone to use as an example of how I should be behaving. This shouldn't come off so snively, although I know it will. There's just such a big disconnect for me and I don't know how to get the pieces to fit together. I can't help but feel this weird sense of frustration because, as much as people say it, life really is not fair. It's not that I have it worse; don't worry, I am aware of that. I think it's just a combination of the sober mind with going to school and seeing all these people who are in their early 20s and still live with their parents while they go to school, or these kids whose parents are paying for their education. It's not that I want more from my parents, although it will sound like that. It's more just the huge disconnect between my life and theirs. I haven't lived with my parents since I was sixteen, so when someone tells me that I should've stayed with my parents through college to save money, I just can't help but laugh. It's, like, the innocence. That's what it is, I think, that makes me so sad. It's the innocence of a 22 year old to be upset because their mother didn't pay their phone bill or a third-year student whose parents have supported him through school. Then I compare myself and my life, and I'm like... holy fuck. It leads my mind down this crazy path where I'm like thinking about all the things I had to do to keep my head above water when I was that age. I think the ones who are like 18 or 19 are the worst for me because it's like what I could've been like if I didn't live on the streets and do such incredibly vile things to keep myself where I wanted to be. And above all, that's the sickest part to me. It's the things I did to be where I wanted to be, not to survive, but to survive in the way I wanted to survive. It's not like I was just some homeless kid sleeping on a sidewalk. I wanted to exist in a way that is above what the average person even does, and I have no idea why. I don't know what made me feel like I needed or deserved to live so... trying to think of a good word here... so frivolously? Like, I went above and beyond what I needed to do just to survive, is what I'm saying. And that leads to this cycle where I get pissed off because I'm like, it's so not fair that this person is so supported and so well taken care of. It's weird, I'm not angry at the people who are taken care of that way. I'm happy for them. Some of my best friends are completely supported and taken care of by others while they go through school. I think it's awesome. I wouldn't want anything less for them. It just makes me angry at myself, and I have no idea why. I don't know where that emotion would come from, but it does. It's like I'm pissed off at myself for constantly doing everything myself and driving myself mad with pressure. I can't even imagine what it would be like to just worry about school. I can't picture working two shifts a week at a pizza joint and smoking weed on breaks. Sometimes I hear people talking about things, like how they just got a new car or how they're going to graduate without debt or how their apartment has three bedrooms with a loft. I just want to make them understand that the only reason they have those things is because they have so much help. I don't want to tell them that, I just want them to understand it on their own. You can't really brag about graduating without debt when you've been supported by other people through your entire student life. Anyone could graduate without debt if someone else paid their tuition, I mean, by definition they would graduate without debt if they didn't pay for anything. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this. It's more than what I'm talking about right now because it leads my mind into all sorts of weird directions. To make matters worse, I have incessant headaches and moods that swing like a pendulum. I've been taking my medication like I'm supposed to, but I spend a lot of time just laying in bed working because I can't even get myself to stand up and move to another room. I just feel my moods snap and I have to get away from everyone before I say something awful and then feel bad about it for the rest of the day. Once it fades, I feel fine again usually, for a little while. I hate the way this entry sounds. I won't even go back and reread it. I'm not explaining myself properly and it sounds like I'm a spoiled kid complaining because their parents won't pay for college. That's not what this is, I swear. It isn't about money or self-pity or anything like that. I swear it's not. I just get into these negative cycles of thinking because I start wandering in my mind and I can't shake it. It may have started when Grandma died. I don't know. If I just blog without a prompt sometimes I can sort of open the doors to let my walls down a little and get back to my roots with the whole thing, or whatever. If you made it this far into my entry, you're a trooper, gotta say. I appreciate you. no matter how we part, i hold you sweetly in my head and if i do not miss a part of you, a part of me is dead. |
Artist: Jon Bellion Album: The Definition Song: Luxury [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics Blog Like You're... Holden Caulfield: Tell us about your best friend. Today is the last day of being Holden Caulfield and I have to say, I can't wait to be my goddam self again. I have a best friend. His name is Jordan and I've known him just about forever. He's a real honest guy and all. If you look at him in the eyes, he can't lie to you like Abe Lincoln and all. He's confident as hell too. He can be a sonuvabitch, but he's always real confident about it, so you maybe don't notice right away. I'll about go into withdrawal if I don't see him for a couple days though. I really will. I have hardly any confidence at all, so I like to see him and feel better for a while. Even if he's only flattering you, Jordan makes people feel better when he's around. He really does. We have a lot of fun together, but I don't even know what we do, to tell you the truth. I guess we just lay in goddam bed and listen to music all the time. What I like about Jordan is that he's always up for something. He hardly ever says he's not in the mood right now, but I have to be in the mood for almost everything. I really do. I'm quite a nervous guy, but not Jordan. The only thing that turns him into a pain in the ass is when he doesn't have his crumby cigarettes. He'll damn near have an aneurysm if he loses his goddam cigarettes for a few minutes. But all in all, I guess if that's your worst feature, you aren't that bad of a guy. He can be a bastard, I guess, but who can't? He isn't a snobbish person. I mean, he's not a hot-shot and all. He's just real confident. The way you know if someone is your best friend is you can't imagine ever not being their friend. That's the way we are, I think. We hardly spend time apart. The first thing I do when I seem him, I'll give him a big hug, even if I saw him yesterday and all. He isn't a phony person. He's honest as hell, to tell you the truth. He doesn't care if I get depressed as hell or if I start acting like a screwball. If I'm not in the mood to do anything, he'll just lay in bed with me. If all of a sudden I get the itch to do something, he'll jump up and do it. He doesn't ask questions. That's what I like about Jordan, you don't have to explain every goddam little thing with him. He just understands you. List Mania: Are there questions you have about life that you don’t know the answers to? Make a list of all the questions you have – they can be silly or as serious as you want them to be. Questions that I seriously don't know the answer to... 1) If someone is a judge/lawyer, do they have to serve jury duty? Wouldn't it be a conflict of interest? Like, if they lived in the same county where they worked then they would know the judges/court staff because that's also their place of employment. What if they stop working there, would they be able to get called for jury duty then? Wouldn't it still be a conflict of interest because they'd still know the staff? 2) When a pregnant woman has twins, are there two umbilical cords, one for each baby, or is it just like, one that branches off? I just have no idea how this works. If there are two umbilical cords, then were there eight umbilical cords when that woman had eight babies at once? 3) If someone has a lazy eye, do they see in two different directions at the same time? Say one eye is looking at you and the other one is looking up, can they see the ceiling and you at the same time? If so, is this a superpower, because it sounds like a superpower. 4) What happens to fish in the winter? Do they swim below the ice? How do they not freeze? Do they just all die off every winter? As you can see, I have about a million questions regarding this subject. Isn't water colder the further down they go? At what point is the water not solid ice anymore during the winter? It's not ice all the way down because people go icefishing. But how do the fish not freeze? 5) Why do I get chills/shivers when someone walks behind me? If someone walks behind me, my whole body gets a chill through it starting at the base of my spine. It happens all the time in class when someone walks behind me. It also happens when someone touches my hair. Just... why? 6) When people do sign language, is there a way to put an inflection on the words? Or, like, could you be sarcastic in sign language? Is there a certain way to sign the letters that lets the person know you're being sarcastic or is it in the facial expression? If you're excited, can you show it by signing even more dramatically or do you just have to sign that you're excited? 7) If someone was born deaf, what do they hear in their head when they think? Is it a specific language or is it just, imagining sign language? I don't understand this one at all. I assume that deaf people have thoughts in their head, but what does it 'sound' like? When I think in my head, I think in English, but if they've never heard any language, how do they hear thoughts in their head? Do they hear the words in what they think they'd sound like when spoken? Is it just all jumbled but serves the same purpose? 8) Say that X person has a restraining order against Y person and Y person is at, I dunno, a library. If X person goes to the library too, does Y person have to leave the library? Don't worry, I've never had a restraining order against me, I'm just not sure how this would work. Like, would the person with the restraining order against them have to leave everywhere they went if the person who filed the restraining order showed up? What if person Y & person X both have restraining orders against each other? Do they both have to leave or do they have to call the cops and sort it out? Rock paper scissors maybe? 9) Are there any animals other than humans that are ticklish? And while we're on the subject, why are we only ticklish when someone else is tickling us? First of all, I hate being tickled. I will kick a motherfucker in the face. But what I wanna know is, are humans the only species that are ticklish? And why can I touch my ribs with no issue, but if someone else does, I can't stop squirming and laughing? Plus, why do we laugh when we're tickled even though it's not funny and we're actually super annoyed? 10) What would a prison/hospital do if there was a huge fire inside? How would they get everyone out of a prison all at once without a riot? Is there, like, a picking order where the small-time guys get out first and then if there's time, they'll come back for the death row inmates? What about a hospital? How do they vacate everyone before they burn up? What if someone's in the middle of heart surgery and their sternum's all open? Surely they can't just take them outside where all the bacteria can get into the patient's body. I really need to know the procedure for all of this. could you lay with me, underneath the stars, just conversate with me? |
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It's great to see you back around. I'm sorry you've been having life issues. I hope you're doing much better now? You know I have a foul mouth. 
Just why. It's so gross. We need to get you some personal finance help! This is only tangentially related and not a statement on you, but one of the nonprofits I work with consists of me making budget plans for people who were recently homeless and have just gotten back on their feet. A lot of the people I work with have only been at their job for less than a month or been in an apartment for a week or two. My role is to gather all of their financial information and then consult with them on their bills, disposable income, purchases, and stuff like that. It's shocking to see the financial decisions people make after just being homeless. I'm like, dude, you were just homeless 2 weeks ago. 
I have seen so much of the disasters it has caused with some people. I have in the past been unconsciously roped into financial situations that were most unpleasant and having to make sensible plans to unravel them.