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 |   My first blog about my life, my favorite music, my opinions, my feelings. Whatever. |
This is the first blog I've ever had! You'll have to bear with me because I'm still learning how to do this whole thing. I'll admit that it's bit of a mess right now. I started blogging for "The Soundtrack of Your Life"  and I couldn't just let it end there! I don't think there's any point in keeping a separate blog for all of the blogging groups I want to join. I'm going to keep them all in this one so I can grow into an eclectic pot of confusion.What you'll find here:  My opinions on everything. Blog prompts for various groups. A different song everyday that means something to me. Experiences I've had in lifeWARNING This blog is rated GC and will contain offensive language, stories, and opinions. Please don't read if you're easily offended! My intentions aren't to offend anyone, so trust my warning and turn back now or forever hold your peace!  Things I'll be using this blog for:  "The Soundtrack of Your Life"  "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise"  "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" I want to hear from you! As I mentioned before, this is my first blog. I'd love to hear from anyone who reads this. Leave a comment, rating, or review. Let me know what you like to read about. Have a suggestion for me to write about? I'd love to hear it. The best thing about a blog is the exchanging of opinions between bloggers and readers. I want to keep us all interested. Plus, it's just nice to get a little love sometimes. Let's get to know each other.   Charlie ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **   ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
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Artist:Butthole Surfers Album: Electriclarryland Song: Pepper [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm in a mood today. I'm trying really hard not to be, but it isn't really working out for me. I hope you're all having a good Monday. Okay, you know what? Fuck it. I'm just going to rant and you can skip ahead if you don't want to hear it. This is my first year paying self-employment taxes and holy shit. It really pisses me off that the government wants to take so much of my income. I would literally be able to afford the same lifestyle I have now if I just didn't work and mooched off of the government. Fuck me for not having a bunch of kids I can't afford, right? It's really upsetting to me, as you can see. I mean, I'll get through it the way I get through everything. But it really gets me down. Like, why didn't I just stay a junkie sleeping on people's couches? The government is basically telling me that I have to stay with that quality of life because they want to double tax me for being self employed. I know this isn't rational thinking, but why have all of this responsibility and nothing to show for it? I know that I have to grow up and be a contributing member of society. But I don't know why self-employed people get swept clean like that. You're treated the same way that a huge company like Wal-Mart is treated, as far as taxes go, but you get none of the benefits. I feel like the government just wants me to be a waste of space. Okay, I'm done. You can resume your reading in peace.  Blog City March 10, 2014 Prompt: Tell us about some of your commuting experiences to work. Is it enjoyable or horrific? If you work from home, what is it like not to commute? How did you turn your home into a work environment? Working from home is amazing in terms of commuting. I used to wake up at six in the morning to make the commute to my job. It's so nice to be able to roll out of bed and be at work. I can work in my pajamas (and do regularly) and pretty much do whatever I want. There's no one to tell you what to do or when to do it. The downside is that you have to be really self-motivated. I think working from home is what you make of it. If I have a really lazy month, I don't make near as much money as I could. When I worked for a company, I could have a week straight where I just did the bare minimum and I'd still get paid the same amount. There are a lot of ups and downs, too, it's like a roller coaster. I have an extra bedroom in my apartment where I have a desk and computer. There isn't much in the room, which is good because it keeps me from getting distracted. I can go in and close the door to just have silence and a 'work-like' environment. I don't use the room for anything else, either, so I have this mental association with only working when I'm in there. The longest commute I've ever had for work was forty-five minutes each way. There's positives and negatives to that. I liked the drive home more than the drive there, just because I could blare my music and kind of decompress from the day before I got home. It was a good winding down time.      30DBC March 10, 2014 Prompt: I recently rediscovered the usefulness of the library ( *Blush* ) even after working here all year, and began looking more and more in depth at the covers of books. What book are you reading now? If you aren't currently reading a book, what is the next book you want to read, or what is the last book you finished? What drew you to that book? Look specifically at the cover design, the back cover, and the inside flaps. What makes this book one that would stand out on a library shelf I have a terrible habit of judging a book by its cover. I like things that look kind of minimalistic. When I'm looking at a book, I like when you can clearly see the author and title on the spine of the book. I don't like when there's a whole bunch of stuff on the cover. The last book I read was actually off of recommendation, which is a common way for me to find a book. Usually if I hear someone talking about a book, TV show, movie, etc... I'll end up wanting to experience it myself. One of my friends was telling me about Looking for Alaska by John Green. She had actually been telling me about it for a long time before I finally read it. I like the cover because it's just the simple rising smoke on a black cover. It looks like it could be kind of bleak and realistic, which I like.You can see the back of the book through that link, too. It has "before" and "after" in big letters. It caught my eye when I was in the bookstore and I realized it was the book my friend had been telling me about. When I opened it up, I saw that the book was broken up into sections, like, "One hundred fifty days before". It made me wonder, before what? So, I thought it would be a quick, easy read and went for it. I definitely enjoyed it, though probably not as much as my friend who talked about it for six months straight.  That's my usual way of finding a book anyway. I like a catchy title and a minimalistic cover.Some will fall in love with life And drink it from a fountain That is pouring like an avalanche Coming down the mountain |
Artist: FIDLAR Song: No Waves [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I feel like I've been hit by a bus. I have no idea why, but Daylight Savings Time totally ruins my life every year for, like, three days. It's funny because I don't even have a conventional job where I have to wake up early and lose an hour of sleep. I just lose an hour during my day and it throws everything off. Yeah, I'm whiny. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ So, today is something of a freebie day. There's no prompt for Blog City, and it's just the weekly news prompt for 30DBC. Look at all this room I have to say whatever I want. I'd like to thank those of you who commented on my entry yesterday. I know I talk about some taboo topics sometimes. I kind of think of my blog as an extension of my journal. I don't put everything here that I would put there, but I'm definitely not in the business of pretending to be something I'm not. I'm sure you guys understand. This week went by really fast for me. This entire year is going by fast. Actually, I think since I turned twenty-one, I've hardly had time to notice the time flying by. I never wanted to be older than twenty-one anyway. I mean, what's the point? I wish I could have stayed that age forever. I'm sure a lot of people think that. Time is something that really bothers me. Well, the concept of age is anyway. I know that sometime shortly people are going to stop looking at me as a kid. They're going to expect me to be responsible and have my shit together. I don't like that. I've been thinking about moving to California. I've lived in a lot of different places, but never there. I've thought about it in the past, but always ended up somewhere like Chicago or Houston instead. I'd really like to live in San Diego, at least to try it out. I don't know, I get bored. It's expensive, but I'm already paying over a thousand bucks a month for an apartment where I'm living now. I don't need much, because I probably wouldn't be home that often. A studio or one bedroom would do fine. I've looked at apartments, but I don't know the specific neighborhoods so it's hard to know where exactly to look. Anyway, just a thought. I'm going to move on to my post for 30DBC. 30DBC March 9, 2014 Prompt: Provide your thoughts/opinions on a newspaper/magazine article or a radio/television news story from the past week. This is a difficult prompt for me, like I said last week, because I never watch or read the news. It's funny though because for the past two Sundays I've gone through and looked at all of the big news stories for the week. At least it has gotten me current on events and stuff. So this week I found one that at least entertained me on a personal level. It's about Colorado's new drugged driving ads . They're pretty hilarious.I like them because they're getting a good point across that will appease people on both sides of the table; but they're also lighthearted. I think it's geared to the right people. I don't know. I guess this isn't exactly news. I'm just rambling at this point. But I don't really feel like talking about the Malaysian plane missing or whatever else is going on. Wow, I really haven't learned anything, have I? I feel, feel like I'm a grandpa I feel, feel like I'm already 80 years old And my skin's so cold I need a new body and I need a new soul |
Hey guys! It's a busy day and there's lots of prompts to do. It's Soundtracker Saturday! So there's going to be a portion for that at the end. If you weren't with us during "The Soundtrack of Your Life" , you're probably going to be confused. Feel free to completely skip over that part because there's graphic content and it's maybe offensive. Other than that, I hope you're all having a great weekend. March 8, 2014: If you could relive one moment from yesteryear what would it be? I'm trying to think here. Is yesteryear like last year or is it just like in the past? Hang on. Okay, so it apparently means recent past, like the past few years. Well, you guys don't want to know what I was doing before last year, trust me. I'll try to think of something that isn't offensive or nefarious. Let's see. Yeah, if I could relive a recent memory, it would be when I was living in an apartment with six roommates and my current wife when we were just dating. We lived in the middle of a huge city, but barely paid any rent because there were so many people living there. We were dirt poor without internet or television. We spent a lot of time playing cards and just hanging out around the city. It was just nice to have so little financial responsibility. That's the best thing to do in a big city, by the way. Just get a bunch of like-minded roommates and split all the bills. You end up paying less than if you lived in the middle of nowhere. But, yes, you have to have roommates.  March 8, 2014: It's Saturday! Did you get to sleep in? Make a few creative excuses for why you were able to sleep in this morning. If you didn't get to sleep in, what woke you up? I did get to sleep in, like I do everyday. I don't try to, but I have a perfectly reasonable excuse. I roll around in bed and realize that it's late and I should get up. But there's this little voice in my head that says, "It's okay if you sleep a little longer." I love this voice. He's my best friend! Every time I feel like I should be doing something, he's there to let me that's it's cool if I totally don't do whatever it is I should be doing. He's been there as long as I can remember, just giving me that extra push I need to stay in bed alllll day long. It's actually perfectly reasonable for me to sleep in late. I mean, I stay up until like three or four in the morning. I'm productive in the afternoon and evening. Then I stay up late playing music or listening to music. I don't see the problem here. ツ Soundtracker Saturday Week One There aren't that many people who have pure darkness in their soul. Sure, there are plenty of people like you, who are generally somewhat shitty. But to meet one of the few people in the world who are bad to their very core, that's almost an accomplishment. What's wrong? You don't want that? Feel her pull the strings like the puppet you are. Rehab is a strange place, especially when you're young. It's like seeing into your future. You see all these people who have been at this so much longer than you. You get to watch them make excuses as they talk about how their kids won't speak to them. They're all so proud of themselves, and for what? For fucking up the lives of everyone around them for a few decades before finally deciding to get clean? You don't owe anything to anyone and you've got it all figured out. You just have to get through detox first. You decide immediately, within an hour, that this isn't going to work. You got yourself into this and you'll have to get yourself out of it. You don't have a problem the way these people do. You aren't like these people whose blood itches so bad they have open sores all over their body. Think you're going to get lice or scabies from them. Laugh at the fact that she got to go to this beautiful rehab by the ocean while you're stuck inland with the crackheads. Think you'll play along for a couple weeks, then get her a-okay to come home. That was before the withdrawal. The anxiety is the worst part of it. You can't stop shaking. There's this overwhelming feeling of fear, but you can't put your finger on why. You just lay on the uncomfortable cot, curled into a ball. The nurses come in and say that you've got to 'sweat it out'. They give you what they can. The sheets are soaked, but then the chills set in. You sweat so much it drips into your eyes. There's a bucket next to your bed for when you vomit, but that hasn't set in yet. Every muscle in your body is on fire, screaming at you to give it what it needs. It all feels tight, like it's stretched out as far as it can go. You feel stuck in certain positions, like you can't move. You can't sleep because the second you do, the nightmares set in. You almost last three days. It's awkward coming back home after that. What can you say? One thing's for sure, you realize now that you have a problem that's bigger than you. But you're stupid enough to think that it's only a problem if you let it be one. It's this whole sick thing where you get out and hit the ground running. You don't even bother with making excuses anymore. What's the point? That night, she sits you down to have a discussion like a real adult. She tells you about how your addiction is negatively affecting her recovery. You ask her if she just wants you to leave, but she starts crying the second you say the words. She says that she wants to be with you, help you through this and all of that, so that we can get married. It sickens you that she could think about something like that at a time like this. How selfish can one person be? You tell her that she should probably leave the room, on a count of her rehabilitation process. She glares at you and slams the bedroom door as hard as she can as she leaves the room. You feel so at peace though, happy even. You don't know yet what she'll do to you. Come on over and do the twist Overdo it and have a fit Love you so much it makes me sick Come on over and shoot the shit. |
Hey, look, it's Friday already. When did time start going so fast? I'm probably going to jump straight into the prompts today because I have some stuff to get done this afternoon. So here we go! Blog City March 7, 2014 Prompt: March 7, 2014: Describe the last time you were moved to tears by something beautiful. Wow, I think you may have actually caught me here. Let's see here. The last time I was so moved by something I cried. Hmm. I'm thinking... Just give me a minute. Okay. I don't think I've ever done this in my entire life. Let me explain though. I'm not one of those super macho dudes who are like, "Yeah, I'm a man. I don't cry." I totally cry, but it's always because of a negative emotion, usually anger. I can't think of a single time something was so beautiful I cried. Oh my God. I didn't even cry at my wedding. I have no soul. I can't even watch the ASPCA commercials because the animals look so sad, but I didn't cry at my wedding. I mean, if ever you were going to cry of happiness, it would be then. I think I'm missing the gene that makes you cry at beautiful things. I'm defective. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 30DBC March 7, 2014 Prompt:Who is your evil twin? Write about the mischievous deeds that he/she has done today. Who's my evil twin? I am the evil twin. Why, just today I loitered outside of a gas station for at least two to three minutes. Not only that, but I went up to ten miles above the speed limit. I got a call from my mom and I hit the ignore button. I woke my cat up from his sleep just to see him yawn. I made an appointment, then forgot to go to it or cancel. I called my friend a jockstrap just because I didn't get my way. I threw away half of my breakfast and lunch because I was full. I was too lazy to do anything, so I laid in bed listening to music instead of working. I told my wife I didn't care how she felt about where I want to move. All this and I've only been awake for a few hours. You see, I am my own evil twin. It's no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy, Cause every now and then I kick the living shit out of me. Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk? I didn't mean to call you that. |
It's about that time of year again when I start my apartment hunting. You see, I do this horrible thing every single year where I move. It's weird now because I've actually collected personal belongings, like beds and couches. We used to move at least once or twice a year, but we didn't have anything then. We could just pack up our car and go wherever, get a six month lease and a crappy job. It's a lot easier to do it that way. Now we have to get a moving truck and actually pack things into boxes. It's horrible! You might wonder why we don't just stay in one apartment. That's a fair question, but I've got a good answer. Maybe. Well, for one thing, every apartment wants to jack the rent up by at least a hundred bucks or so a month after your first lease is up. It's hard to stay in the same place and pay more every month for it. Also, I guess just change of scenery? I don't know. I don't like being in one place for too long; it makes my blood itch. We're hoping that we can get our rent lower in our next place. Of course that means we'll lose some space and amenities, but you gotta do what you gotta do. You have to look early, too. We've found that out. If you wait until a month or two before you move, everything's going to have a waiting list or they aren't going to have what you need available at the time you need it. We're not moving until June, but it's best to start looking early. Okay prompts, yes. Blog City March 6, 2014 Prompt: This winter just does not end! It's been going on for over 400 days. Write about it: what is causing it, what can you do about it, how are you handling it, etc. I think that I must have done something really horrible to someone to deserve such a terrible winter. In fact, I'd like to apologize to everyone for this winter that was bestowed upon you all by my bad karma. Also, I'd like to apologize for my grandiose ideas. But, seriously, this winter has been the worst thing that's ever happened to me. Wait, I'm being dramatic again. I'll get the hang of this. I don't know what's causing a winter like this. Could it be global warming? Sure. Could it be just really sucky? Yeah. All I can do is curl up under my covers and hibernate like a bear until spring comes. I don't handle it well at all, which is funny, because I'm from Maine originally. You would think I'd be used to it. I'm living in the Midwest right now though and, at this point, I'm pretty sure I will never get used to the winters. My biggest fear is that it will literally never end. I mean, what if it just doesn't end? What if it's May and still snowing?      30DBC March 6, 2014 Prompt: Mac or PC? Ah, the good old-fashioned Mac vs. PC debate. Look, if you wanna fight about it, let's just go out back right now. So, I'm not an Apple fanboy, but I do prefer Macs. Why? I like OS X. It has a simple, clean interface. I think Macs are more secure as far as viruses go. Even with an anti-virus, I've still ended up with a virus on PC. Most trojans are written for PC though and largely don't affect Macs. I also like the design of Macs more. I typically find that they're sleeker and more modern looking. Now, there are obviously a ton of different PCs, so I'm sure you can find some that are sleek in design. By and large though, I've found that PCs are typically bulky and ugly in comparison.That being said though, I'd choose an Android phone over an Iphone any day because you can have so much more control over it. Plus, if someone wanted to give me a free PC, I'd consider taking. Can't you see I'm trying I don't even like it. I just lied to Get to your apartment, now I'm staying Here just for a while. I can't think 'cause I'm just way too tired. |
Artist: Vampire Weekend Album: Modern Vampires Of The City Song: Unbelievers [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics This is so strange. I got a call at 3:30 this morning that woke me up, so of course I answered it in a complete panic thinking someone had been arrested or died. There's this guy on the other line and he says, "Is Charlie there?" So I'm like, "Yeah, this is he." Then he seems to get really anxious and says, "Sorry, wrong number." I started saying, "What? No. This is Charlie." But he hung up on me. How weird is that? I mean, I know I have a somewhat common name, but it doesn't make any sense. If you're calling somewhere looking for a 'Charlie' and the person says that they are Charlie, how can you have the wrong number? I know I'm probably overthinking it. It was most likely just a prank call and they weren't expecting someone to answer with that name. I don't know though, it set off weird alarms in my head. I mean, the guy sounded older, and prank callers are usually like twelve. I looked up the number he called from and it's out of Oregon, which is even stranger because I don't know anyone there and I never have. I dunno, just odd to say the least. Let's do today's prompts. Blog City March 5, 2014 Prompt: You get to spend one hour with any person you choose - living or dead. Who is it? What do you talk about? What do you hope to learn from them? Ah, this is a good question. I'd definitely go with someone who's dead, because who's to say I won't get the opportunity to spend an hour with someone who's alive?  Well, this is probably the easiest prompt I'm going to get. There isn't a person that has ever existed that I'd want to spend an hour with more than Ernest Hemingway. It isn't just that he's my favorite author (although he is). The reason I would choose him over anyone else is because his life was so full. He would have so many interesting stories to tell. He did so many different things, traveled so much, experienced so much. Of course I'd want to talk about writing. But I'd also want to just have a drink and have a full on philosophical conversation that would make me unwell in the head for days. I don't know what I would want to learn from him. Truthfully, I probably wouldn't want to learn anything. The end of his life was really sad and I don't think I'd want any advice he'd have to offer. He fascinates me, but not in a way that I idolize him or want to live the way he did. Plus, cats. Lots and lots of cats.       30DBC March 5, 2014 Prompt: What is something you did as a kid that you still enjoy doing today? Or, what is something you did as a kid that you wish you could still do today? The best thing I did as a kid that I can't do anymore is not worry about paying bills. I thought my parents were being overdramatic when they said that all they got in the mail was bills. Now I realize that they weren't dramatic enough, my God. I don't get anything in the mail unless it's a bill. The second I pay one bill, there are two more bills waiting to be paid. There are still things that I do today that I did as a kid though, mostly because my job allows me to. I sleep in and eat cereal while watching cartoons. I stay up as long as I can, I never 'intend' to go to sleep the way you think of adults as doing. You know, I don't tuck myself in at nine or ten and wake up at six in the morning. Basically, my sleeping patterns are like a big kid's. I did notice something recently that I wish I could still get away with doing. You know those checkered tile floors that you see in public? I was in a mall the other day and I realized that I was only stepping on the black tiles. I mean, I started out just kind of trying to do it. But after a few more feet, I was really trying to avoid the white ones. I was, like, maneuvering around people to avoid them, and sort of skipping.I looked up and there was a woman talking on her phone, giving me this terrible sneer. I just wanted to scream, "Look, lady! I know it's immature, but the white ones are hot lava. OK?" We know the fire awaits unbelievers All of the sinners, the same Girl you and I will die unbelievers bound to the tracks of the train |
Artist: Blind Melon Album: Nico Song: Soup [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I'm so tired I can barely think straight, so this will probably be interesting. Well, that's apparently all I have to say. Maybe this won't be interesting after all. I had a really horrible panic attack this morning. I know that's not the kind of stuff people want to read about, but I'm having trouble thinking of other things to talk about with my mind racing and my hands shaking. I'm sorry, I'll just move on to today's prompts. Blog City March 4, 2014 Prompt: Today is the beginning of Mardi Gras. Have you ever been? What do you think of the festivities? If you did go, what carnival costume would you pick? If you live else where are there similar festivities? I've never been to Mardi Gras and I honestly don't know much about it. All I've ever known about it is girls flashing for beads. Is that what they do, or is that just something people say? Hang on, I'm going to have to look Mardi Gras up. Okay, so, from what I've read, girls mainly do that only on Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras. I'm not sure what that means. I would dress as a vampire if I went to Mardi Gras because I read Exquisite Corpse by Poppy Z. Brite and it took place in New Orleans with vampires. Okay, I'll admit, I didn't research far enough to see what people typically wear to Mardi Gras, but it looks like bright colors. So let's say I'd dress up like a neon vampire. I'm kind of from a lot of places. I move around a lot, and I've been to things like parades or state fairs, but I can't think of anything in particular that would be like Mardi Gras. I've been drunk at a carnival before and vomited off the side of the ferris wheel with the city lights below. I think that's pretty similar? 30DBC March 4, 2014 Prompt: There are many new, fantastic changes happening around WDC. What thrills you about the community we call Writing.com? On a broader note, what does Writing.com mean to you? How would you "sell" a community like ours to a writer friend of yours who is looking for a good writing site? I've been on WDC for a month, and I know that most of you have been here for years and seen the site grow and change over that time. What I love about WDC is that the community is unlike any other community I've ever come across. The people are so welcoming and kind. I'll be honest, usually when you're new on a site, everyone treats you like crap because they've been there longer than you. I've never understood that mentality, but that's the reason I've never become a permanent member on another site. I don't like the attitude of, "Oh, you're new and I've been here longer, so, yeah, screw you." This community doesn't have that feel at all. It's full of positive vibes and good energy. In just one month, I've found that WDC is a place that I can always come just to relax and talk to people. There's always someone around who's willing to throw some love your direction. I can see why so many people call WDC their home. I haven't gone evev a few hours without being on the site since I joined in mid-January. There are so many activities to be involved in and so many ways to help others out. It's a really good feeling. If I were to try to "sell" our community to a fellow writer, I would tell them about how everything on the site revolves around writing, but it has so much more to offer. You can find friendship here. You can find critiques on your work. You can find inspiration for writing. Maybe it would be faster if I named the things that you can't find on WDC. Well, I think that's going to be about it for today. I need to get some reviewing done and stuff. I hope you're all have a good week. I apologize again for the negativity in my blog. I'm sure you guys can understand. And I got a corner store and that's all the more For me to praise upon the holidays And now I'll close my eyes really, really tight And make you all go away |
I guess it's Monday now. Working from home is strange because you lose track of days. Sometimes I'll be in conversation and I'll end up saying something like, "Well, at least it's Friday!" Only to have the other person look at me like I'm the biggest jerk and sneer, "Actually, it's Wednesday." It's not that I don't feel like my work is work. There are days I hate my job as much as anyone else. But there aren't really days off when you work from home. Sometimes I'll take Tuesday off and work Saturday to make up for it or whatever. I guess it really isn't just that though. I've always had the habit of not knowing where or when I am. Do you ever start filling out a check and think, wait, what year is it? I mean, you don't want to get that wrong. I think Daylights Savings Time is soon too, but I'm too lazy to Google it right now. That's another thing that will throw me for a loop. Is it seven or is it eight? Wait, is it six? Today is my first day blogging for Blog City, so that's something new that I'll be doing everyday. I'm still trying to get my blogging style down, but I'll get the hang of it eventually. I want to congratulate all of the Quills winners and nominees. You all deserve the best. Blog City Prompt: March 3, 2014: Tell us about the last thing you got excited about — butterflies-in-the-stomach, giggling, can’t-wait excited. I've got to be honest here. When I first saw this prompt, I thought, yeah, I never get that excited. Then I was like, maybe I should stop being a pretentious douche and actually think about it. Guess what? It worked! I can't believe it didn't come to mind right away, but I just got married last fall and had this feeling the entire week before the wedding. I couldn't even eat because I was so excited/nervous. You would think it would end there, but it didn't. At the reception, everyone was all, "Dude, food!" And I was all, "I'm not feeling it." Funny actually because I'm already a pretty lean guy. Okay, I'm scrawny, whatever. It's the same thing. So not eating for a week before the wedding was not a good idea as far as tux fitting went. So yeah, I guess five months ago was the last time I had that feeling.    30DBC Prompt for March 3, 2014: Did you watch the Oscars? Tell us about a time in your life that was worthy of being made into a movie/TV show/novel/short story. I definitely don't watch the Oscars. It's not exactly my cup of tea. I was sad to hear the Leo got snubbed again though. Maybe someday? As far as a part of my life that could be made into a movie or book or whatever, it was hard to narrow it down to one situation. If you've read my blog before from "The Soundtrack of Your Life" , you know that I had a bit of a rough run in my teenage years. I don't want to tell something I've already mentioned before, so I'm going to tell the story of the worst thing that ever happened to me. Hey, misery makes for good entertainment, right?When I was eighteen, I moved across the country to be with a girl I had been seeing on and off for a couple of years. At that point, I hadn't been living with my parents for a while either, so it wasn't a huge deal for me to move so far. Anyway, this girl was basically a toxic wasteland, and I was well aware of that when I moved in with her, so only I can be to blame for what followed. After I lived with her for a little bit, she really started pushing getting married. I tried to tell her that we weren't stable enough due to various issues we had in the past and were still having. She wouldn't budge on it though, and was nagging me all the time about it. If we were watching a movie or TV show and someone got engaged, she would burst into tears and lock herself in the bathroom for hours. She would talk to her friends on the phone about how I wasn't committed and didn't care about her. I'm sure you get the picture. Somehow, every situation and conversation would come back to marriage. It was driving me crazy. One weekend we literally fought about it Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday. I couldn't take it anymore and told her that I was done with the relationship. I guess it would be hard to understand if you don't know the full story, but we hadn't been in a committed relationship since we met. It's hard to explain. Anyway, I was done. I took a flight back home that weekend and tried to get over the whole thing. I was living with my brother and got myself a job. Just as I was starting to forget about it, I got a phone call from her. It was like three weeks after I moved. She told me she was pregnant. I was completely confused because she was on birth control, but she told me that she had to take antibiotics for something and had forgotten that it could make her birth control ineffective. I won't lie, I was really upset. I didn't want to have a kid and I especially didn't want to be attached to this girl for the rest of my life. She kept telling me that she would get an abortion if I wanted her to, but, while I'm not against abortion, I'm against abortion for me. I would never want that for myself and I would never ask a girl to do that, so I told her no over and over. I had no idea what to do. I was across the country and I really didn't want to move back in with her. It was just such a bad a scene. I really didn't want to bring an innocent child into it. But over the next couple of months, I started realizing that this wasn't just about what I wanted or didn't want anymore. We had to put aside our problems and try to work things out. So we did. I got so excited when she sent me the ultrasound picture. I told her I would keep working until close to when the baby was born because I was making good money. I said that during the sixth or seventh month, I'd have enough saved up to move and decorate the nursery. All that parent stuff. I was actually okay with it. I even told my family about it and they thought I was an idiot, but were halfway supportive of the fact that I was going to do the right thing. It was during the fifth month that I got a phone call from one of our mutual friends. She was all excited and telling me about how she was going abroad for school the following year. At some point during the conversation, she asked how I had been and what I'd been up to. I told her I'd just been working and saving up for the move. I was surprised that she had no idea what I was talking about. You know where this is going, but it went like this: Friend: Emmy and I aren't talking anymore. We got into a huge fight a few months ago. Me: Oh, that sucks. Wait, you know about the baby, right? Friend: The baby? Me: Yeah, Emmy's like five months pregnant. That's why I'm moving back down there. Friend: What are you talking about? Me: ... It's my kid. She's pregnant. Friend: Uh... Okay. Well, I literally just saw her last week and she's, like, as skinny as ever. I really couldn't say anything from there. I mean, what can you say in a situation like that? I can't even remember what I did right after that, but I think I might have gotten physically sick. It was the worst feeling ever. I know I was denying it, but in my head, I'm pretty sure I knew. I called Emmy and told her what our friend had just told me. Her response? She hung up on me. I called her back and it was like someone answered the phone and just hung up. I called for a third time and it went straight to voicemail. I kept trying to call after that and it would always either go straight to voicemail or it would just ring. Eventually we ended up talking about it, but I never got a clear answer on what she was thinking. I mean, she said that she wanted us to be together and yadayadayada, but I mean, seriously. It's not like someone is just going to marry you and magically forget the part where there's supposed to be another human being involved. It pisses me off to even think about it, so I think I'm going to end this entry here if that's cool. Big me to talk about it I could stand to prove If we can get around it I know that it's true |
Artist: The Velvet Underground Album: The Velvet Underground & Nico Song: Sunday Morning [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics Ah, another week past, or is it starting? I've never really thought of Sunday as the beginning of the week. I wonder why it's like that on calendars? I just looked it up. For those who are interested, apparently it depends on your religion. The more you know, right?March 2nd 30DBC Prompt Provide your thoughts/opinions on a newspaper/magazine article or a radio/television news story from the past week. Well, I can't claim to be a big fan of the news. I'm one of those terrible people who lacks opinion on nearly everything political. I have no idea why, but I 'just don't care'. I think all of the political parties are basically the same, I'm not religious, and I'm cool with everything as long as no one is getting hurt. I guess one of the biggest news stories this week is the Russian invasion of the Crimean Peninsula of Ukraine. Here's a link for anyone who isn't up to date. This is the news story I'm basing this blog off of, though there are hundreds of others that you can find on the internet.So, I can only give this the perspective of one American who is not cultured in any sense of the word. I'm just not. I'm most likely incredibly offensive when talking about world affairs without trying to be because of my own ignorance. So, keep in mine, these are just my opinions. Feel free to correct me in the comments below or educate me in any way you see fit. The first thing I think when reading about this news story is, Great, another power play by Russia. I mean, from what I can tell, Russia's interest in Crimea is the military base they have there. But really, the Crimean Peninsula is full of Russian sympathizers, is it not? Really, I think Crimea is just a pawn for Russia to play with and see how the rest of the world reacts. They're always flirting with trouble just to see how the US and the rest of NATO are going to react. The sad thing is that these are people's lives that are being used as a token of power. Basically, the US will be very vocal about their disapproval, but nothing will come of it. It's one of those, 'If you don't stop, I'm going to have to tell you to stop again' situations. Don't make me tell you to stop again! I don't even think the US citizens are concerned about Russia at this point. I don't ever hear anyone around me talking about it. Just like Russia did in Georgia in 2008, they're going to push ahead and do their thing with no interruption from the rest of the world. That doesn't go to say that it won't further isolate their country from the rest of the world. It doesn't help that Ukraine itself seems confused. As an American, I'm not sure if there's a split there where some people actually want Russian invasion and others don't. It's a confusing situation for an outsider, and is probably confusing for an insider as well. Well, that's enough of that for now. I need to try to get some reviewing done, but I'm so into this blogging thing right now. Here's my blogging motto right now ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** If you have anything you'd like to add to today's discussion or you want to clarify something for me, feel free to leave a comment below. Thanks for reading and have a great Sunday. Sunday morning Brings the dawn in It's just a restless feeling By my side |
Artist: Pearl Jam Album: Vs. Song: Daughter [Embed For Use By Upgraded+] Lyrics I have good news and bad news. The good news is, I learned how to embed a youtube video. The bad news is, I learned how to embed a youtube video the day after "The Soundtrack of Your Life" ended. I'm in a state of denial right now, so I'm going to keep pretending like the soundtrack challenge is still going on. Who can it hurt? I've signed up for a couple more blogging challenges, so that's cool. One of them is "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" . The other is "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" . The more daily prompts I have to do, the more I'll have to write about.Oh, more good news! I'm going to start talking in first person, usually, maybe... Okay, so I'm going to do my first entry for the 30DBC. The BCF doesn't start for a couple more days, but I'll have daily prompts for that when it starts. Prompt for March 1, 2014 Write for fifteen minutes using "I used to think..." as your starter. I used to think that nighttime was when a black trash bag was pulled over the Earth. I thought the stars were little holes in the bag. I have no idea where this idea came from, but what do you want to bet it was one of my older brothers trying to scare me? I had so many horrifying theories as a kid and I was afraid of everything. I thought heat lightning meant there was a tornado nearby and clouds came from smoke stacks  .I was not a very smart child. I thought that if you just talked to a bee, it wouldn't sting you and if you slept too long at once, you would die. It's actually embarrassing how long I believed some of these things. Don't make fun of me, I'm serious, but, I thought that manicotti  was a country in Europe until I was twelve. I think I heard someone talking about it in Olive Garden once and assumed that it was a country near Italy. I also used to mix up the words 'rigor mortis' and 'rigatoni'.Phew, I'm so happy to get all of that off my chest. Well, I guess that's good for today. What do you guys think? Good day one? Alone, listless, breakfast table in an otherwise empty room. |
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