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 A terminal for all blogs coming in or going out. A view into my life. |
Started July 1st 2019 for contests, etc. as other blogs are filling up and have other purposes.  My new new new blog is
I'm starting a new blog because
I'll be linking to
I've started an appendix (I no longer have one personally) to keep track of my Space Cadet journals for Space Blog. It's a work constantly under construction. Mind the mess.
I needed to start a folder for contests as there are so many deadlines and details to remember.
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"Blogging Circle of Friends "  Day 3271: October 26, 2021Prompt: What is your favorite October food or drink? Pumpkin pie; although, I really prefer sweet potato pie. Every autumn I ask "when will you have pumpkin pie". I'll hopefully get out tomorrow and go to the Break Espresso to visit friends. There'll have pumpkin pie. "With whipped cream, please." Months and favorite foods used to go together before we could have anything delivered at any season. June was strawberry shortcake... as in picking those uber sweet wild strawberries by the greenhouse. July became cherry-picking when I was older. December was fruit cake. My father preferred a brand from Georgia that was more fruit than cake. April was left over candy. I hoarded candy. End of October Blues: It's the end of the month and I'm running out of steam.  I'm getting out more, which is good, but I'm sleeping too much and that's cutting into my time to write. I know the solution. I'm just not up for it. I'm cheering on the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" . It needs new voices, more voices and more diverse voices. I told NormaJeanTrent: I'm trying to drum up some new customers. I thought of your cheerleading efforts at OctoPrep. I'm more a proper trouble-making pot-stirrer than a cheerleader but I'm trying to behave. I'm working on: men marginalized minorities non-American newbies and black cases octopi I already had a couple successes, so it's working. I do think a few new voices always revitalizes any group of people and avoids having to read the same-o same-o month after month. Now... how to get the nanowrimo crowd involved.  All contests need rethinking and rejuvenation. When I've done what I could, it'll be up to the participants to make it a success by doing as well as they can with the prompts, by encouraging each other through reading and commenting. My role may be commenting on as many of the entries as I can and getting around to everyone, especially newbies or those that may seem neglected. Thankfully, I'm not a judge and if life intervenes I have no obligation. As I age I'm trying to keep those obligations to a minimum. To Lilli re QotD 'tranquility': "Odd that I can't find an answer. First thing that came to mind was silence... but that's not quite true. I felt a certain tranquility crossing a fjord in Norway. But also exploring the alleyways of Taipei. I loved being lost in Bremen. Walks through the woods down old roads comes to mind but so does a corner in a cafe or a place with books. What doesn't work: loud bass, a booming beat, acoustically bright hard walls, people yelling or screaming. I avoid most restaurants and anywhere where I have people behind me. I prefer corners and edges. I can be totally happy in a hostel or in a noisy city as long as I'm not being bombarded with noise. The muted sound of traffic or trains doesn't bother me. Maybe heavy rain on a tin roof in Orosi, Costa Rica. At night.  " I listen to the snow falling on my eyelashes/brow. The touch/trace of your fingers leaving an indelible mark on my heart. The words do not matter. The dreams do persist. |
| Finished and posted: "Nightfuries" "Spirit of the Big Orange Squash" "PPC#19 As the sky lowers [257] (dream dust)" "PPC#20 Anarchy [256] (Campfire)" Since the prizes are great I really need to enter this: "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" What would be the barrier? Language, custom, talking/miming in metaphor, is this a human, cat, alien, alien cat. I need to check my lists and get a move on. Castle Rock, Montana (postcard) You invite me for dinner, a table set for multitudes, a mile high and draped in rainbows of rock and scree. A setting that changes with the seasons, yet fit for eternity. © Copyright 2021 Kåre Enga, [178.259] Sent to susanL  in Minnesota.The rock is biotite granodiorite. Early Sunday Morning 1930 (Edward Hopper) There comes a shortening... ...to the shadows at the break of Sunday as the shop still shut, waits for the barber to show up ...and to our life when our hair's been cut, as our best suit's laid out to prepare us for eternity. © Copyright 2021 Kåre Enga, [178.258] A response to Cappucine who wrote "'Same fog, same conscious movements. Feeling fat, slow, slothy. Elderly, doddery, foggy.' I have a bit of this. It makes me hesitant about travel, something I looked forward to a couple years ago. At least I got out today. If I do that everyday my fog may lift (along with my depression). Now about my weight..." To Tgifisher: "Wonderful memory. I sat in the old drugstore downtown today (now Butterfly Herbs). It still has a counter and booths in back where I can get a milkshake (I like fire&ice = chocolate-cayenne). I was surprised when one kid ordered a raspberry Italian soda. It's a tea and coffee and herbs and ... everything place with tin ceilings and high shelves with a rolling ladder. Awesome atmosphere. They were playing the Tennessee Waltz today..." I restrained myself and didn't add that I have no similar memories from my childhood. I had no allowance. I had no money. I do remember Kresge's. Root beer floats and comics were considered frivolous... and I had no money. 5149 |
| Kindness? Really? Or are just saying/doing that to look good. Posted on the Newsfeed [edited]: There are words of kindness (an assertion said in a kind way... think 'tact'). There are kind actions (like opening a door for someone... think 'respect'). So there are many kind thoughts and deeds. But there's toxic kindness too. The smile that covers up the lies, the 5-star reviews that won't point out flaws, the insincere pat on the back. One can kindly disagree on social-media, here included, but many choose to play it safe and say nothing. Stik to My Own Beat has written a blog entry about toxic kindness. She doesn't like it. And then there are small gestures like a smile, a hearty hello, sharing your piece of pumpkin pie ... just saying. But even sincere gestures can have negative consequences. A smile may make someone watching jealous, pie isn't good for some diabetics. Still... don't overthink it. Be kind. Kindness is a type of behavior marked by acts of generosity, consideration, or concern for others, without expecting praise or reward. – Wikipedia "A kindly tongue is the lodestone of the hearts of men. It is the bread of the spirit, it clotheth the words with meaning, it is the fountain of the light of wisdom and understanding." – Baha’u’llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u’llah, p. 289. Well, I have some work to do. Further reading: https://bahaiteachings.org/not-so-random-practice-of-extreme-kindness/ A response to spidey [edited]: Yes, it's important to be kind and in 16 years I've mostly been showered with kindness at WDC. However... let's be real. A 5 star rating for a 2 star poem isn't being kind. Friends are willing to point out that your zipper is undone or slip is showing while others silently laugh. Are you laughing at me? How to point out flaws, give it a 2.5 and still be kind is the question. If you can... it would be helpful to provide examples that are both honest and kind. Being dishonest isn't kind.
~330 words posted in "Blogville " 5148 |
| There comes a ghosting ...to the gathering — laughing, running, flying kites upon cold hills, and to my childhood innocence — lost to the world so long ago. © Kåre Enga (21.oktober.2021) [174.255] Mel Groves RIP 11 October '21. "Even after Groves’ death, his loved ones were fighting those systems. Just hours after he died, they had to reach out to local news outlets that misgendered and deadnamed him while also grieving his loss, Gumbs said. Some updated their stories; others said they couldn’t change them without confirmation from law enforcement or Groves’ immediate family." Lauren Witzke, a self-styled "Christian nationalist" who embraced QAnon and support from white supremacists, was the Delaware GOP's candidate for Senate in 2020. In a post on Gab, Witzke claimed she was "recovering from this insane bio-weapon called Covid." The 33-year-old, who has worked as a political commentator for the right-wing Christian conspiracy site TruNews, said she had decided not to tell anyone earlier so as not to alert "the shitlibs in the media." "This bio-weapon is demonic," she wrote. "I've lost all of my senses and struggle with constant indifference, brain fog, and I've lost my joy." In posts shared on her Telegram channel, Witzke blamed TruNews for making her aware of the infection, insisting that nasal swabs were ultimately responsible for her getting COVID-19. "I'm an idiot for submitting to their demands and getting tested," she wrote, "and yes I know I need a good husband in my life to keep me from making bad decisions." PP#20 Anarchy [256] (Campfire) Anarchy This is how it started: a ring of stones, cold bare earth, a campfire lit meant to shed some light, some warmth, some heat, enough to boil water, steep the tea, brew the coffee, enough to awaken the world that preferred to sleep. And this how it ended: an errant scrap of paper lit then borne aloft carried on the wind to where the waiting tinder glowered, welcomed its glow its power to light the imagination of the angry world, enough to burn it down, to burn it down. © Kåre Enga (21.oktober.2021) [174.256] 22 lines PPC#19 As the sky lowers [257] (dream dust) As the sky lowers Dreamdust sifted over embers a desperate attempt to assuage the dying fire. Oh to live and die again! Once as a tree they provided shade while a child attempted to touch the sky flying high on her swing. Now logs die to keep her warm snug under an worn-out afghan she once wove — long ago. We ask what were her dreams, what now her future — as the sky lowers to kiss the earth and caress her cheek. © Kåre Enga (21.oktober.2021) [174.257] 14 lines To Charlie: "Covid didn't help my emotions one twit. It severed my routines and left me rudderless. Here at WDC? In general, people send out the vibe that they don't want to be connected except at some happy happy superficial level... and I'm not good at doing that. So I have fewer close contacts than before. And it's not for the lack of trying. I've really been trying. As for leaving... At various times in my life friends left; at other times in my life I did. Now we're just ghosts that use to know each other. At least ghosts have little power to hurt; but, the living sure can." I wanted to add: folks do not understand how hard it is to get out of bed or how daily living can overwhelm. My good news is that a friend has agreed to be my lawyer. I'll set up a simple will and should problems arise ... they can just call Nick. KINDNESS There are words of kindness (an assertion said in a kind way... think 'tact'). There are kind actions (like opening a door for someone... think 'respect'). So there are many kind thoughts and deeds. But there's toxic kindness too. The smile that covers up the lies, the 5-star reviews that won't point out flaws, the insincere pat on the back. One can kindly disagree on social-media, here included, but many choose to play it safe and say nothing. Stik has written a blog entry about toxic kindness. Yes, it's important to be kind and in 16 years I've mostly been showered with kindness at WDC. However... let's be real. A 5 star rating for a 2 star poem isn't being kind. Friends are willing to point out that your zipper is undone or slip is showing while others silently laugh. How to point out flaws, give it a 2.5 and still be kind is the question. If you can... it would be helpful to provide examples that are both honest and kind. Being dishonest isn't kind. |
| To ruwth: "This illustrates some of the issues we writers face (and not just on WDC). I need to downsize here as I'm very close to my item limit. I've deleted before... because I needed the space for my blog. I think I made copies... somewhere. Which gets to the issue of decluttering and rearranging my port. But as for a will... I spoke to a friend Saturday and he has agreed to be my lawyer. So "Call Nick" will simplify matters here and elsewhere. Of course... that still means making decisions and lists. "It's noon and I've made coffee, although I haven't drank it all. There comes a puncture ... ...to false pride when treasured words once cast like pearls land before the swine as they squeal in sheer delight then turn their snouts to root out other garbage hidden in the slime. © Kåre Enga 2021 [178.252] (20.oktober.2021) Also to ruwth: "Daily struggles remain one's own until you share them. Then you find out that you're not alone! Not all life is an edited essay or an award winning movie. The mundane, by definition, is what we face every day. It's messy and oft-times frustrating." There comes a tumbling... ...when autumn comes and roots break off from dried out weeds, now driven 'cross the prairie by the wind and to the wash as water sloshes cleaning coats and woollen sweaters just in time for winter. © Kåre Enga 2021 [178.253] (20.oktober.2021) There come a hush... ...to the public square as the bell tower tolls while the full moon glares behind a cloud of smoke; but, from my secret place I watch two goblins prance and joke, a werewolf with its eyes aglow, the vampires stalking both. © Kåre Enga 2021 [178.254] (20.oktober.2021) To concrete-angel "Thank you ever-so-much for many reasons: 1. I counted 1... 2... 4... as a child. I never cared much for the number 3. This of course makes no sense. However, I was at 399 and now I'm 400. The 300s are history! 2. I entered these and mostly forgot about them, then time passed and I was busy doing other things. 3. I used one for Shadows&Light (S4) but I was disappointed in the results. But... the other poems were awesome.  4. I need to edit these and find the originals as well and add those written since then and recently. 5. I need to review, edit and basically delve into my portfolio to see what's hiding in there. Some I've quite forgot. Others I need to consolidate into a single entry. My unread or unloved flash fictions come to mind. I'm near my limit of allowed items. I need to do some house-cleaning. Items with lots of views or lots of reviews or high ratings will be kept. The others? Depends. Thanks for the encouraging cattle prod.  "This was what she sent me: For a breathtaking and evocative compilation of themed poems  There comes a fattening ...to the crab before we free it from our traps to boil then crack its carapace, and to our flesh as fashioned shells begin to grunt and groan and outfits split. © Kåre Enga 2021 [178.255] (20.oktober.2021) To Kit re families: "It's helpful to read and watch depictions of family in other cultures. In Thai TV series the strangling, supportive and/or toxic roles of the parents can be in-your-face. Westerners might think parents are controlling, and even some Thais may agree; but, when I visit, their cultural concepts of respect given and received is not up to me." 5145 |
| A Newsfeed response to Samberine Everose: Something I've noticed in the comment sections of romcoms (like Thai TV BL) is that many watch for 'the kiss' (which is usually in the last episode as a resolution of 'tragedy' in the episode before it) and the happy ending. Imho, neither are necessary and at times too cliche. But apparently that formula works for consumers and producers of this genre. Length? If it's emotionally satisfying readers want part 27 whether it's "Game of Thrones" or "Halloween" And if it's commercially successful it never ends... A short story can have a greater impact than a novel and become a classic but whether it 'sells' or not may determine its 'success'. *sigh* I'm not motivated by money. I write for myself as it helps me emotionally but I also write for others as a gift. I had a flurry of over 30 emails. This unnerves me as it triggers the 'what did I do wrong' response. But... there was no reason to be concerned. Still, it illustrates how no news is better than good news at times. I manage depression better than anxiety. I told Harlow Flick: "Much is taught and not innate. When I visit Thailand I have to remember to not be angry, to use words and not intonations (the languages are tonal), to learn the proper pronouns that depend on situation and relationship, to learn how to eat with fingers and spoons (forks are not put in the mouth, knives are not present, chopsticks only used for noodles). Respect is paramount. As is a smile. I have much to learn." To Neva: "Tolerance may seem lukewarm but it's a virtue we need to learn unless we are eager to live in a hot/cold hell." "Space Cadet" quote? We sat there staring at the emeralds dissolving before our eyes. The Vulch consoled me. "There's a lot of stardust out there that needs to get a life. You have one. The Void be jealous." To Fathertymme: "Jack has payed us a visit. I collect dead and wilting marigolds and snip the petals off with scissors. They are drying now. In the Season of the Snow Queen that Jack heralds I will add some color and flavor to rice. I wonder whether red roses and peach carnations will also suffice." ...building bridges between mountains, the isolated peaks of our existence, the valley slumbering, dreaming of visions, never opening curtains nor looking up towards the sky... ~410 words Posted in "Blogville " 5141 |
| Prompt from "Space Blog" . The captain here, popping in with a prompt. I'm still typing one-handed, but... Writing intentionally bad poetry is difficult as Brooke is plotting. can tell you. Check out
and write about intentionally bad poetry. I responded to a posted response by Prosperous Snow celebrating: Why do it intentionally? Half of what folks consider poetry here is bad, real bad, as in 19th century uber uber baaaad. The cure is learning how to use the poetic tools (and not just their names). Reading a wide range of old and new poetry can open the mind to more than "roses are red" or Shakespeare (most of his sonnets are dreary). There is this notion that poetry is easy because it's 'short'. But finding the right word to fit the intonation, rhythm, rhyme, or 'heaven-forbid' evoke an emotion? Not so easy. Even free verse isn't easy. Your 'bad poetry' entry by-the-way was far more poetic than much of what tries to pass as poetry here. I look forward to locking antlers with fellow poets who can fashion diamonds out of crap. And yes, we all write crap. If the contest includes entries by Beholden, 🌖 HuntersMoon, concrete_angel, Brian K Compton I'm usually humbled. And that's good. If they don't enter any win by me may be a pyrrhic victory. I'm hoping to see their terrifying (as in instilling terror in me!) entries this week for "Invalid Item" or in some other contest.I miss Tinker as she may be the best poet on site. But... newer members like Adherennium are challenging us! And this is great. I rather lose to poems worthy of Pushcart Awards than "roses bleed red" any day. Rose bleeds red. Violet bleeds blue. Are there aliens among us? Hey, get a clue!  So this week I placed 3rd in Darleen's Dark Dreamscapes... which out of 20 entries is no small feat. Last year I won twice and bombed twice. But 'crap with a ribbon is still crap'. So... I was happy with this poem... not ecstatic... just happy (it's not crap; it's just that I know I can do better).
And 2nd the week before:
I have high hopes for one poem entered in a contest that's not judged yet. But that's up to judges. In the past I've flopped in one contest to resubmit and win 1st in another. Those who want to write daily might try "EXPRESS IT IN EIGHT " . I love geology so the prompts this past weekend led to four (now edited) poems:"Don't take me for granite [248]" "Scar tissue [249]" "Continental drift [250]" "Weather or not [251]" 5131 |
| flash's comment is excellent. Once one knows/sees the face/name/sprit of a being (be it a tree, a monster, your neighbor, an alien) it's much harder to kill/muder/exterminate. That's why Jackson's story "The Lottery" is so horrifying; it breaks that rule. And why dehumanizing dead civilians, referring to them as 'collateral damage', allowed the War in Iraq to not evoke as emotional response (in the US) as the American hostages held by Iran in '80. Much easier to care about missing famous people than the girl down the street you never spoke to. So yes, a ghoul may have the same response. Never look at dinner's face; never give breakfast a name. Much harder to eat Piglet than pigs raised on a factory farm. For Friday's QotD: "Talking to my friend who has agreed to be my lawyer lifted a burden and put a smile on my face. Since I don't trust anyone it was important to cross that bridge. It's a load off my mind. Because I've stepped over the threshold of old age I need to have a will, health and financial proxies, someone on my side. I really needed that years ago, but that's history. Looking forward, aging isn't guaranteed to be easy." I was in deep anguish at a school in the Great Lakes. I will not mention which one. I despised my dorm and my roommate; the feeling was mutual. I couldn't drop out unless I wanted a one-way ticket to Viet Nam. My draft number was #49. I was a goner. I decided to switch schools. Excerpt from Road Trip 1872 (plus 100 years) [ASR] from On The Write Path Third Place in Week 2 of Octoberfest 2021  Award by 🌑 Darleen - QoD   to
I wrote and posted 4 poems today the 17th. On to the 18th. I told Viv: "I felt at home when I lived in Kansas in a way that I didn't where I grew up. I moved to different places to grow but they were never home. Oklahoma was enticingly alien, but not home. Kansas part deux wasn't as easy after 40 years; we both had changed. Montana can be comfortable in some ways but it isn't 'home'. To an extent we are like turtles, we take our home with us. I felt perfectly safe in Japan and Taiwan but could they be home? The Balkans would take some adjustment, but I feel good there. Norway is extremely safe and pleasant but it's hard to make friends. Portugal is closer to where I'm at ... but I will change as will the Portuguese. I adjust. Or I leave. I should never have moved back 'home' years ago. The price I paid was too high." 5128 |
| Ask me whether I care. Part of me doesn't. I'm up earlier than usual and need to head out. I took a bath last night but a shower may be a good idea. Off I go. Is this the season of dry skin? 2 solutions: 1. use lotion. 2. travel to a moist climate. I went to market and bought hargisa and a blueberry pastry from Irina. At Butterfly Herbs I got a mint oreo milkshake with Irish creme. A goo combo. Saw Nancy Rishoff. She'd look good in my alpaca turtle neck. Sacramento State is in town for a game against the Grizz. I had a chance to go but without glasses what would I have seen? I'm fading. I worked again on my poems and ended up writing four instead of two. Now to choose. I also will write a poem to a postcard of Montana. Who will be the victim? No clue. What the meek inherit postcard of the Boston and Montana Copper Smelter Copper came. And copper went. What remains but toxic tailings. The land once rent must be cleansed; more money spent, while sons and daughters of copper barons went — elsewhere. Slash and burn. Dig deep and leave the mess. No thoughts for the wounded Earth that the meek inherit. © Copyright 2021 Kåre Enga [178.248] (16.oktober.2021) Sent to Pat. 71 degrees at 4:20. Barely a cloud in the sky. The Grizz fans weep. 27-28. Nick caught up with me and we spoke about him being my lawyer and getting my affairs in order, will, etc. About time. I'm not getting any younger. Ate pumpkin pie, drank the devil's brew ... black. Feeling a bit better. Spoke with Jackie Smartt outside of the Wilma. I told her I was jealous of her walking stick and then her son Kent showed up (he gave it to her). "Things like Texas’ declaration of secession in 1861, which, in part, stated: “We hold as undeniable truths that the governments of the various States, and of the confederacy itself, were established exclusively by the white race, for themselves and their posterity; that the African race had no agency in their establishment; that they were rightfully held and regarded as an inferior and dependent race, and in that condition only could their existence in this country be rendered beneficial or tolerable." Texas succession 1861: https://avalon.law.yale.edu/19th_century/csa_texsec.asp 5127 |
| Part 1 Halfway through the month and I feel like my wheels are spinning as I sit here in bed contemplating The Void (a.k.a. my future). Merry's call interrupted my thoughts. I got to see her on Messenger and she got to see my awesome hair (uncut for two years). She wasn't scared  . I'm 'sunken' and my skin isn't good and ... no use looking in mirrors. My father and uncle lived to age 82. My grandfathers 73 and 75. I'm aiming low. And no... that's not being negative. The reality is that I'm slipping in so many ways. Do I really want to outlive myself? I need to do that WDC Will, need to talk to Nick, need to get a grip and salvage what I can before the lights go out. Part 2 Saturday: farmers market winding down until the 30th. Check mail. Sunday: wash clothes every three to four weeks. I might not go out. Monday: see friends if I get out of bed. Tuesday: see Monday. Wednesday: regular market. Thursday: Billi Jo's worker Angie stops by and we chat. I might see friends. Friday: see Monday. I used to have a different rhythm. I used to have a life. Part 3 Yeah... I need to ramp up my writing. Contest entries are due and I'd love to enter "Invalid Item" as it's only twice a year.Need to have a more disciplined approach to learning Thai, but reading and watching TV series are helping me understand the cadence of the language and the culture. 1. You defer to your parent's wishes; thou shall not whine. 2. You defer to class, age, power and money. 3. You never show anger. It doesn't end well. This is a passive/aggressive culture. 4. I'm not sure what I can eat as I don't do spicy. I'm left-handed. 5. I need to make up some itineraries to calm me down. I'm good at that type of planning. I'm dreaming of meeting people and the stories I will share. Part 4 Certain aspects of my life are on hold and therefore a disaster. I need to deal with my depression before it's replaced with anxiety. I do eat. Today I had rice mixed with lemon, mackerel and yellow marigold petals. I've been eating cashews. I'm keeping up with my caffeine. I ought to drink more tea. I 'processed' petals I'll dry and add to my food: marigold (yellow, orange, red), carnation (peach and red), calendula (yellow). I'm going to take a soak now (because I can) in hope that I steam away the ennui. ~430 words Posted in "Blogville " 5113 |
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