Engulfed

The fires of vanity, the mires of insanity,
The simplicity of beauty,
The wires are scrambling, rambling,
Gambling on a money shot, a funny thought, in the path
Of my mind crosses, and ends up all for not,
The right one, the wrong one, the entire lot,
It scares me, ensnares me, trips me up and rips me,
Limb from limb, sink or swim, I got to rise up and think to win,
One last time I drink the gin
And swallow hard and blink it in, my tears, catch me tripping,
I’m slipping from the peak of my wisdom
I’m living like I’m meek but I quiz ‘em, I list ‘em all to see the truth
You are living proof I’m engulfed in your flames....

Sorry for crying, my eyes are blinded by your effervescent surmise
A story of mine, dying in sliding surprise, your glory is divine,
The pleasure of you is fine it’s mine, and your infinite soul
Burns holes of love through a tortured frame
Your simplistic goal, not money not fame, not everyone’s love,
Not screaming your name, not biding your time, not fighting the rain,
You’re easy to please, and the sight is so plain, to see you’re needed to be,
A light to my brain, and I want you
Haunt you do in chains, binding spirits held fast, and stuck the blade,
Truly jade, soothing, fade; I’m washed clean of your grave,
An enticing engage, I’m wasted, wrecked; I’m willing to wage, to bet on the time
Your silly games trade, in spades, my passion is consumed
By the engulfing entrails of your listless flame...

So sickly do the words from me flow, a torrential rain, a tremendous show,
Of wickedly splurged ideas that grow, a residential pain, in my head it’s slow,
Its evil thoughts; filtered fluid drops, of good pain and bad joy,
A searing, sane, drifting toy; a boy, a coy young person in the body of a man,
Who understands your mind, knows mine is like wine, maybe too weak at first
But gets finer with time, and I don’t mind the wait, the sugar is cane, is sweet
Its' grain, like sands through my hands, my fingers cant stand up to the
Scalding demands that I require, I set my eyes higher, to the skys that can't be reached
I preached all I can to you; you left me no choice but to choose the ultimatum,
That leeched, stalled, and fanned your flames; I played your games verbatim,
You were near but far and masked your scars from me,
Knowing you were weak, knowing your indecision to meet, I was so to speak,
Unstoppable, impossible to capture your heart; I became uncrossable,
Listen to each syllable closely; choking on my words I don’t breathe, I won’t leave,
I wont deceive you, I want to be you, with me, with ease, with pleasing grieve,
I don’t deserve you, I won’t desert you, and I can’t believe you think I would hurt you,
I love you, I’m lost without you, I stop to think but you took my thoughts too you robbed me clean
You ripped my dreams blatantly and I stopped to scream Satanly, matronly, I wait patiently
For you to see, your flames aren’t bleak, your fires not weak, and I’m not out
I’m in, swimmingly with sin in your fires I’m engulfed....

Now when I first saw your face, I was amazed, the beauty the grace,
I was dazed and crazed with emotion the motion has set in, has jetted and wetted
My whistle, a thistle in my hand and a crack of the whip, my heart galloped on and
My body thrummed like a drum, raged like a caged
lion, I try and tell you I’m dying but I fell through the cracks my lip split I was racked with sobs
And stopped to catch my fleeting breath, I’m feeling death knocking on my chest, clenching
With stress I arrest, I feel it come down, the lights fade out, the smells the sound,
The air in itself is heavy as the world it crashes
It burns it dances away on its heels it smashes
Me thrashes me prances on my mind it lashes
Its fashionably romantic, the feeling I get, I’m hit with it, like I bet I know the answer, the reason behind
The every crazed comment the romance divine, I am enslaved by your torment, of solace defined
Of holding my line, my life, the sign, my strife, my master design
I am flawed but I hold not counter aligned, mismanaged dreams and saunter from dry
Wells, I’m felled by you, like the redwood mighty sliced by blue
Licks of lightning, it's frightening the kiss you blow.
I feel the glow of your love blossom
To fires of colours of power so awesome
It engulfs me…

The methods of mayhem I induce to use, to get you to see this heart you abused,
Are my words on display I’m not right to infuse you with a sense that you lose?
That you lost something great, I’m right here its not fake, the crush on your shoulder
Is but a small pebble to the gargantuan boulder that I hold on my back, the
Arrogant soldier who slings bullets and tracks, behind enemy stacks, I’m trapped in limbo
I’m flagrant violation of a martyr's life code, I’m right though to think that you left me to
Flail, you gave me no choice, the water must bail, from the bottom of the boat, I want to set sail
To leave this world alone without fail, you must see me for what the autumn does nail
The times have a changed, rearranged the deranged insane delay, its all I can say
I cannot explain the rage you fuelled in my pain, I cannot stay afraid of what you might say,
I must move along at a pace you are afraid, to tread you dread all the crazy dismay
That I serve you, with love with care and to unnerve you, I stare into your empty eyes
And want to alert you to the flare you burn into my swath of care,
I’m losing my mind, your choosing to find, the true thing that binds you to love,
So with words I’ve defined and chosen the decline of all the good you bring,
I shove away, I’m so scared to let you go but it’s all I can say to make sense to myself,
What do I do now, who do I talk to when you've been my release, you’ve been my peace
You have been the ear that needed to cease, to hear true lies, so simply deceased,
You’ve folded my heart and wrinkled the crease,
You’ve boiled my soul in searing hot grease, you’ve left me alone and I’m scared to persist
I’m scared to carry on into the mist; the gist of it is this,
I fell for you
I live for you
I knelt for you
I dealt for you
I took a chance and wept for you
I slept with you
I touched your hair
I talked to you
I made you see I cared
I stared
Into my mind's eye.... I craved to feel your transforming body deepening
And pour your loves liquid into my fire steepening
But alas,
it's lost,
the flames have tossed
and taken hold
Of your butterflies,
And engulfed you...