Smile, and the whole world thinks your laughing at them

Smile, and the whole world thinks you're laughing at them
By Jonathan Dubreuil


In the not too distant future, next Sunday A.D....

I dreamed that I was walking down the beach with God. And I looked back and saw
footprints in the sand.
But sometimes there were two pairs of footprints, and sometimes there was only one. And the times when there was only one pair of footprints, those were my times of greatest trouble.
So I asked God, "Why, in my greatest need, did you abandon me?"
He replied, "I never left you. Those were the times when we both hopped on one foot." And lo,
I was really embarrassed for bothering Him with such a stupid question.

“Why do you do this to yourself?” a voice behind me asked. The question pulled me from my dreams and brought me back to the reality that was my room. I stopped my pacing and glanced sidelong at my unwanted guest. My head ached from the days events, and I really didn‘t want to have a conversation .
After a brief pause I said, “I…I don’t know.”
Resuming my nervous habit, I found myself feeling frustrated at how some people never seem to learn when their not welcomed. Annoying how some people claim your things as their own.
“That’s not an answer.” was my companion’s reply. I tried not to pay attention, but I just couldn’t resist.
“No, that is an answer,”, My heart was beating faster, “I don’t know because I don’t care. Since I don‘t care I am free”, the bitterness was practically dripping from my lips.
“Your not being honest. Not with me…or with yourself. I really think your lack of
honesty is your biggest flaw.” I sensed more pity than displeasure in his voice.
Finally I stopped moving and just stood still. I could feel the stress of the day taking it’s toll on me. I felt so weary as my mind throbbed and stewed. I found myself beseeching to my shattered brain for relief; yet, it was unwilling to rest. My vision dimmed and
blurred. Moister glistened at the corners of my eyes. I would have truly cried, if only I could remember how. I tried to think about something else, but nothing came to mind. In that moment I realized the only real problem with life is deciding what to do next.
“Well are you going to say something?” my friend asked, concerned over my long
silence. I wanted to reply, but I couldn’t. I had nothing in my brain. Then I remembered a saying
that my English teacher always quoted when children would bother him with stupid questions.
“Initiative comes to those who wait.” and I smiled.
I glanced at my friend and saw that he was still waiting. I opened my hands and shrugged my shoulders in a gesture of helplessness,
“What does it matter if I’m honest or not?” and with a final shrug I turned away from him to stare at the wall,
“What if I do run to lies for comfort?”
“Then your comfort will be made of lies.” he said. I rubbed my forehead and sighed.
“ Just Great! Now I have a friend who thinks he’s Socrates.” I tried to look upset, sarcasm helps you avoid telling people what you really think, but I
couldn’t help but laugh. Looking hurt, my friend sat pouting in the corner.
“What’s so funny?” he asked, knitting his brows into a frown. I wiped the tears from my eyes and sat down on my bed. It took me a minute to catch my breath, my sides were still sore from the laughter. Taking a deep breath I let out a long sigh.
“What’s so funny?” I said, “ I was just thinking what the difference an optimist and pessimist.”
“Well, what is the difference?” my friend asked, he was already brightening up. I drew myself up and lifted my chin in a dignified air and told him. “The Optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist is afraid that it is.” I said it as if I had discovered an eternal truth. My friend just stared at me. I couldn’t decide if he was about to clap or leave. At that moment I heard a knock at my door. Sitting up, I ran my right hand through my hair.
“Come in,” I said politely. My Mom gradually opened the door and looked into my room. I was sitting alone on my bed, an innocent expression on my face. Glancing around the room, she had a concerned look on her face.
“Honey, who are you talking to?” she asked.
“Nobody.” I replied.
She just stood there for a long time and without a word slowly closed the door. I was relieved she wasn’t going to lecture me again about how I need to go outside make real friends. Maybe I should go out and have a real conversation. What if I was crazy? Then I remembered,
“Truly great madness cannot be achieved without significant intelligence.” and I smiled.