Though my mother has inspired me in many ways she could not possibly handle knowing- I do miss her and I do love her dearly. Sadly, we do not speak.
This is not my preference or my choice.
Although I embrace the same beliefs in God as she, I do not practice certain rituals as she would like for me to. For a great many years, I chose to pretend for the sake of her approval.
I gradually became disgusted with myself, as did my former husband. Then one day, I realized that in more ways than one I was very much so like my mother.
When I was inching my way toward thirty and with children of my own, I decided that enough was enough. I am not against my mother's religion.
The only thing that I am against is the extreme hypocrisy that limps along on the crutches of extreme denial. My mother is a contortionist of sorts in that she can manipulate, twist, turn, shape and finagle any situation or reality to fit only that which she is willing to accept.
So it is, that I quit practicing along side her some time ago and so it is that I am officially dead to her. Yes, I know that each of us are capable of twisting things here and there- but sadly my mother has made Hypocrisy her religion of choice. It is to such an extreme that she no longer can decipher between what really happened and what she needs the truth to be.
This folder shall be my therapy. I write about my pain and my many grievances and it does seem to help me. I often use subtle tones and hints of Catholocism in metaphor. However, I do not have anything against anyone who embraces or practices that or any other religion.
Once again, I am simply against extreme hypocrisy.
And that can most certainly be found anywhere.
Also, while each of these pieces are both personal and emotional, I sincerely welcome any thoughts or comments. I am always striving to perfect my pieces and constructive criticism is a blessed thing. Honesty is welcome and appreciated. Thank you for visiting my port and especially for visiting this particular folder.
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