Too Big A Sense of Loyality & Duty

My loving husband has a highly over-developed sense of loyality and duty. He was in the Military for over 30 years. He is retired now from the Military, but do you really think that means that he is a normal civilian?

I admit that loyality and duty are great qualities. But do you realize that there are civilian employers that can take advantage of these great qualities. I probably would not have believed it myself if I was not living it.

He performs his job duties like it is a matter of life and death. The military trained this man well. His standards of job performance far exceed any that I have ever observed. This should be a good thing. He is an honorable man.

But civilian employer can and has taken advantage of this man's hard set sense of loyality, duty, and responsibility. I am not sure if the same wonderful qualities that enable someone to have a successful career in the United States Military translate into the same type of success in civilian life. I hope that this is just one unique case of a civilian employer exploting qualities that were ingrained in this man during his service to the United States. I am just not sure.

He works all the time. I have seen him work 3 weeks straight including week-ends without a break. This is a common occurance. He has not had a raise in over 3 years. They have discontinued the 5 days a year paid sick leave that he had when he took the civilian job. There use to be a small year end bonus, and now that has been gone longer than it has been since he got a raise.

He has come home and repeated comments to me that his company's owner made to him that have sent me into a foaming at the mouth rage. My husband really does not understand why I get so upset when he comes home and tells me that the owner said to him "You took 22 days off last year. You really need to work on that."

I try to calmly explain that if he had not been required to work 36 hours straight on one particular job that he would not have needed one of those 22 days to recover. It just so happened that after 36 hours straight and getting home after mid-night I did not allow him to go to work the next day. I had turned off his alarm, call his supervisor, and explained that he needed to rest. The man is 57 years old. He really is too young to sit on the porch, but they will work him into his grave. When he woke up he was really annoyed with me, and seriously thought that he would be fired.

After being at work for 21 days straight, working 10 hours or more a day, why was anybody surprized when I insisted that he go to the doctor. The doctor immediately gave him 4 days off due to exhaustion and dehydration. The man slept for almost the whole 4 days. His boss actually called twice during the 4 days just checking to see if he felt well enough to go back to work.

The Military takes care of their own. Unfortunately my husband thinks civilain employers will do the same. He thinks that I am over-reacting.

I have promised my husband that he can take it to the bank that if he gets hurt, or worse drops dead on the job I will hire the best attorney money can buy and I am going to own the company that he has now worked for going on 7 years since his retirement from the Military as an Officer and a Gentleman.

I have been keeping an employment abuse journal now going on some 5 years. If the man dies in his sleep I will still claim that the company worked him to death.

Are there any other wifes of Retired Military Officers that have observed this type of problem adjusting from Military to Civilian life?

I loved the Military. They actually spoiled my husband. Of course I did not realize this untill after he was retired. He spent over half of his military life on board ships, or stationed out in bum-#@$& Egypt where wives and family could not go.

The military required annual physicals, his current civilian employer has taken away all sick pay, and makes nasty comments if he needs to take any part of a day off to go to the doctor.

I am going to stop now, but I am sure I will visit this subject again real soon.

I will have my husband read the article by Magnolia Queen that started me on this rant, but I already know that he will not even consider the fact that that could possibly have any connection to him and his civilian employer.

I do not understand forced Military retirement. This man is just pretending he is a civilian.

Shame on his employer!