City Slicker, Sam

Written for Writer's Cramp....

Clippity-clop, clippity-clop.

“Are we almost there yet?” complained Samuel.

“Almost,” I told my impatient son.

“Who is Cousin Zeke, anyway?” he asked, hoping that the time would fly by if we talked a little.

“Zeke is my mother’s 2nd cousin, which means he is my 3rd cousin and your 4th cousin, I think.”

“Oh.” Samuel shook his head in confusion.

“Never mind that,” I said. “It will be nice to visit the farm once again. It’s been a long time since we’ve left the city.”

“But I’ve never left the city,” Samuel reminded me. “What’s it like… on the farm?”

“Oh, it smells of fresh straw and hay, pigs, cattle….”

“Mom!” Samuel interrupted. “I’ve never even seen pigs and cattle, so how can I imagine what they smell like?”

I sighed. “Well, let me think. There’s a big red barn and a white fence that surrounds the pasture, endless fields of green grass and corn, a 2 story house with lots of people…”

“People?” Samuel asked hopefully. “You mean it’s not all animals, right?”

“Well, of course not, silly!”

Samuel relaxed.

“Look! Cousin Zeke’s place!” I shouted.

Samuel’s nostrils flared, as he comprehended just how many farm animals there were. He already missed the city.

“You’ll get use to it,” I reassured him. “After you’ve been here a day or two, you won’t want to go back.”

“Humph!” Samuel was doubtful.

“Look! There’s Cousin Zeke!”

Samuel trailed behind me as we headed for the barn.

“Long-time-no-see, you ol’ city slicker, you!” Zeke laughed loudly, throwing his head back.

“This is Samuel,” I proudly introduced my son.

“My, how time flies,” Zeke sighed. “Born and bred in the city. It shows, I’m afraid. Come on, let me give you a tour of the barn.”

“Well, I happen to like the city,” Samuel blurted, holding his head defiantly.

“Never been there, to be honest,” Zeke answered. “But I sure can tell you ain’t from no farm, boy.”

Samuel looked at me for back up, but I just kept laughing right along with Cousin Zeke.

Zeke showed us the newborn calves, the sow with her piglets, and the sheep bleating in their pen. An unfamiliar sound grabbed my attention.

“Zeke, whatever is that noise?” I asked.

“Ah, you have not yet met my wife!” he exclaimed. “She’s over in the corner reading to the twins.”

“You can read and you’re from the country?” Samuel asked, surprised.

Zeke chuckled. “Not me, I never did. But Nelly once lived in the city, years ago. She was a city slicker, like you, Sam. We’ve been together for about 5 years this coming spring.”

“Are you going to introduce us?” I asked with enthusiasm.

But before Zeke could open his mouth, a beautiful white mare galloped excitedly to the trio.

“Whoa, Nelly!” Zeke whinnied tenderly to his wife. The twin fillies followed their mother awkwardly.

To make a long story short, Samuel grew attached to his 5th cousins, Annabelle and Miss Lucy, and decided that farm life had much more to offer than pulling people in buggies every day. I was introduced to Nelly’s brother, Mr. Ed, and eventually birthed my own set of twins who could not only read, but talk, if you can believe that!

The end…