Bon Appetit.

(This won 2nd Place in rogue_66's "Flash Fiction Contest")


         It was lunchtime and sales were brisk, as usual, at the popular fast food chain. The two men sitting in the corner looked out of place. They weren’t eating, only drinking coffee out of Styrofoam cups from the coffee shop across the street. The patrons of this restaurant were mainly office workers, stay-at-home moms with their cranky kids, and teens from the high school beside McDandys. The men in the corner, on the other hand, looked like high powered executives.

         The guy in the blue pinstripe suit was jotting down notes in his daybook. Every so often he’d look up and scan the crowd then look at his associate with a little knowing smile.

         “This location’s achieved 132% of their sales target for the year...not bad, ” grinned Mr Pinstripe. “That’s a 46% increase over last year at this time.”

         “If this store’s any indication of the corporation’s overall fiscal health, I’d say that little investment we made was the best thing we’ve ever done,” replied his partner.
                                                 ~ * ~ * ~* ~

         Two years ago, the ideas people at McDandys head office read about a leading scientist, Dr Ubel from Europe, who was doing research with microorganisms. His theory was that he could prevent food poisoning in people by injecting his subjects with a harmless parasite, which in turn would feed on any staphylococcus bacteria entering the host and neutralizing the negative effects. Thus, saving millions of dollars for the already cash strapped health care systems.

         The corporate head honchos thought this was something worth looking into. They persuaded Dr Ubel to give them exclusive rights to his discoveries in return for the financial backing he needed to continue his experiments. Dr Ubel reluctantly agreed.

         Soon after, he discovered that when the parasites had finished neutralizing the bacteria, his subjects were left with an intense craving which could only be satisfied with more of the offending staphylococcus. McDandys Food Research Team saw possibilities that repulsed even the greedy bean counters. But, of course, that didn’t deter them from approving the idea of adding the parasites to the city’s water supply.

         Their reasoning was that everyone drinks water and so would be infected with the parasite, which wasn’t harmful in and of itself. However, as soon as they ate the staph laden burgers at McDandys, that would activate the perpetual cycle of the two organisms. Eat the staph, activate the parasites. Once the staph was expelled from their system by being digested, the unsuspecting diners would crave it again and again. Thereby providing a never diminishing supply of customers and ensuring that McDandys would ultimately become the world’s largest fast food chain.

         “I’m dying for some real food. Let’s get going or we’ll be late for our reservation at Sebastians.” As the two men were leaving, the familiar sing-song jingle was playing on the sound system:

         “There’s a lit-tle McDan-dyyys in eeev-ery-one!”