Song of the Sand Demons-chapter 1

         The bright yield sign yellow rust bucket of a car once known as a sporty Firebird, rounded another curve, only to place its worn,bald tires on another long stretch of desert highway. The two lane blacktop seemed endless to Karla.
"What are you doing?" she whispered once again as if it were the only thing she could mutter over and over ever since she left her husband sitting in his usual chair in the suburban living room home he occupied, surrounded by empty beer cans and the TV set on, as he slept it off in the usual nightly routine. Drinking was not always Dan's problem. But that was another time in space as far as she could remember. Right now, too many demons followed her, her feet swollen, which was a normal occurrence along with poor eating habits she had developed after her bout with becoming severely ill a few years back.

         Back then, she had always thought things were alright between the two of them, the kids now grown had went off to live their own lives. Her daughter, now married with her own little boy, and her son, who had traveled off to what he felt was a better life, at least a better life for him, confused as he was both then and now, to the big city, the 'Big Speakeasy' of New Orleans. Her youngest, James, decided to make it on his own there and she hoped it would go well for him.
Even though this was her family, what was left of it anyway, she knew they were all only a thread away of being severed from her life.

         Eyes now darkened from lack of sleep. A bit puffy from the last crying jag she managed to indulge into at the last rest stop somewhere near the Colorado state line, just made her feel that much more empty inside. Karla had always been an emotional sort of woman, even as a child her emotions ran high, she cried easily, but after living with Dan for the past few years she felt completely alienated from the one person on this earth she always thought would be there for her, after all, he always was before, and she had a good idea what brought on the whole 180 degree change in him. It was James.
She shook her head wildly, trying to erase the thoughts of what remained of what she had always called her family now, and tried desperately to focus on the road ahead of her.

         The sun, now just making its way over the horizon, bringing daylight into existence again, and shedding the nights shroud of shadows behind it. But, shadows never disappeared in her mind, they were always there, chasing her,consuming her, and the constant repeating words stabbed her mind in regular intervals. "God, I wish i could die. I want to die. please help me die. I can't do it alone."
Yes, she was afraid.

         She had been told when she was sick in the hospital that she had indeed died twice and had to be revived. Why did'nt she stay that way? and why was she here now? going through this personal hell, and trying so desperately to run from it?.

         She stared ahead, the road remained straight, no more curves in sight, at least not yet. The road was an unfamiliar one, and ran directly through the now desert landscape, it was going to be hot again, perhaps too hot for her liking even though she always loved the heat and hated the cold, snow, ice, and long winters that plagued the north with a vengeance. She would not complain if it got too hot, she would just keep driving on, with no true destination in sight.

~~~


         "hiss" There it was again, that sound. Karla moaned and sighed heavily knowing it well, the car was going to overheat again but she kept driving, lowering her speed hoping to get just a little farther down the road. But to what? there was nothing in sight other than a few large boulders of red rock, and the never ending desert in every direction. The palate of sand, a few cactus standing erect among the bright turquoise sky, and the ball of fire shimmering above it all would have made some artists dream come true. To her it was another nightmarish fear, the thought of being stuck out in the middle of nowhere, with an overheated engine just made her heart sink lower than the dirt surrounding her.
"What next?" came the words uttered mutely as she navigated the Firebird slowly down the road.

         It had overheated three times before on this little journey of hers. Each time she was lucky enough to be near a gas station, rest area, or some small town not far from where she finally had to pull the old junk car over to the side of the road. This time, she was not going to be as lucky. Although she did think, and filled up three one gallon water jugs up and threw them in the back seat, just in case.

         "hisssss,hissssssss" it was growing louder now, what she called smoke, which was steam, decided to billow out now, making its way to the windshield, causing her view of the road to get harder to see at every second. The car began to go into its convulsing state, not sure if it wanted to keep going or stall out completely, it suddenly hit her, she had not seen a car or anything in at least a good hour or so. She winced, rubbed her tired eyes and finally guided the car off the road, navigating it the best she could through the smoke, steam, haze that seemed all too consuming at this point.
"Now what? why does it keep doing this?" Of course those answers would never come, unless she made up some reasonable ideas in her mind, and at this time, just did not seem to come. Letting out a deep breath, and leaning back in the seat, she began to rub her temples, going into sort of a rocking motion, she attempted to will her mind to just accept this set back now.

         It seemed like just seconds had gone by, and she instantly raised her head and began to unroll the window, the heat was more intense than she imagined. Even with the window open the hot air just seemed to stick to her with no relief in sight. She was thirsty too and reached back grabbing one of the water jugs to take a drink herself, the car could wait. She twisted off the plastic top and tossed it to the passenger seat, took a long drink. Almost choking it down from drinking it so fast, she stopped, wiped her lips and stared out through the vapors still surrounding the windshield and the rest of the car, letting her other hand idly fish for the plastic cap. Hand sliding across the imitation leather seat, now also hot to the touch, the left over air conditioning not lasting long at all once the car was turned off and the window opened proved that vinyl was not the best investment if you decide to drive through a desert. The cap now long gone, she did not divert her eyes to even look for it, instead, she switched the water jug to the fishing hand, pulled the hood release and opened the door to get out.

         She had forgotten she removed her shoes and stepped out, landing bare feet on the hot ground a sharp gasp was quickly heard. Her feet, they were swollen. Thats why she took her shoes off, she remembered now and grabbed for her worn out tennis shoes only to find, her feet had swollen up so bad, she could not get them on.

         Finding an old newspaper in the back seat, among all the rest of the rubble and things she thought were either important, or things she figured she would throw away later, which never happened. At least not within the past six months or so, and grew into quite a mound of a junk pile. She threw the papers down, piece at a time and made her way to the hood of the car, finally opening it up, the steam slapped her in the face with such force it took her breath away. Quickly lifting the bottom of her skirt up she twisted the radiator cap as slow as she could, letting the pressure out little by little, the water jug now on the ground beside her, she waited a few seconds before finally removing the cap totally. She remembered that from High School, the only girl to be allowed in the vocational schools auto mechanics program. Yes, she did open the doors there for any other female student who felt the need to compete in the world of the auto mechanic. Right now she was glad for that knowledge gained at least, although her true intentions of taking the class was to "check out the guys" instead of actually applying herself like she should have. "Guys" Karla muttered that word with almost total disgust now. "Who needs em?"




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