i want a cat

i dont even know anymore. my writing become very messy. i dont even know anymore. im so lonely. i want a lover. i want a lover. i really want a lover. i want someone who will ask how my day is. who will ask how im doing, who will be by my side. who's just like me.

i dont know who is "him" when i talk about that man now. he never tried. he always give up. he always do. i dont even know if a a 'point' can make it even more convincing for him to understand that he was not even love me.

i dont like him, but i like to talk about him. he's the guy you'll see everywhere because his life choices is some sorts of dumb but he always made it to the end. he's the type of guy who will like a girl because the girl like him first. he wants something useful from me. i'm no longer want something exciting from him. i dont even know what im talking about right now because i dont even feel like im living anymore. im so lonely. i want a lover not him.

he's not a lover. nobody suits me. i want someone who understand me and try hard for it. i dont know.

i want a lover. im so lonely