a biography of a lonely girl |
She was into Goth and bloodplay, walked around in black T-shirts that said "Wholesale Slut," admitted to having a jones for the Osmonds, never allowed a man with a memory to share her bed.
In high school, she was voted Most Likely to Underachieve.
In college she only dated black guys.
In graduate school she decided not to become a registered voter.
Her journals were filled with entries like: "The world is my oyster and it just gave me a bacterial infection," and "Between sex and love, I would choose nothing."
Word on the street was that she behaved admirably in the company of archbishops and historians though not so stellar in the presence of philanthropists and diplomats.
I was in shul the day she was bat mitzvah-ed on her 30th birthday.
She wore a black leather yarmulke, a cape covered with little sequined Star of Davids', accompanied by a goth metal band during the reading of her haftorah.
On the day of her funeral, we all played hooky at work, walked around barefoot, smoked strawberry-flavored bidis and lactuca virosa, got snookered on absinthe and behaved as if we were in the company of philanthropists and diplomats.
But we all agreed that when she made the covers of Time and Newsweek the following week that she had had too many dates with strangers and not enough bloodplay with archbishops and historians.
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