You Aren't Going to Believe This

You Aren’t Going to Believe This

“You aren’t going to believe this,” Jack said.

“So why tell me?” Alex said, not even slowing down.

Thrown off, but recovering quickly, Jack said “What’s the matter with you?”

Alex stopped walking, “Me? What is the matter with you, if you want to tell me something and you know I won’t believe it, why would you tell me I won’t believe it?”

“It’s a saying…”

“What’s a saying?”

“Ah… it’s the words people usually use to say something so the person their talking to… so the person you’re talking to, knows… I don’t know! It’s what people say, a say-ing.”

Alex looked perplexed, “So what are you saying?”

“I’m saying it’s a saying.”

“No, I mean what were you going to say after you said I wouldn’t believe what you were gonna say?”

“Now I’m getting confused…”

“What were you going to tell me!”

“Oh! Yeah! So, Tommy Scheller got a new bike.”

“I don’t understand. Why wouldn’t I believe that?”

“See, I don’t think that’s what it means really…”

“What else could it mean? Either somebody believes you, or doesn’t.”

“Well… the way my father uses those words. It’s almost always him saying ‘you won’t believe this,” and then he tells me and it’s true, and I believe it.

“Oh. Well that doesn’t make any sense, but I know grown-ups are hard to understand sometimes. I wonder if we will be like that when we grow up.”

“I guess I already am.”

“So, what did you want to tell me that I won’t believe but it’s really true?”

“Huh, I don’t even remember now…”

Oddly enough, both boys remembered that conversation for the rest of their long, and successful, lives. Plus, neither one of them ever started off a conversation with: “You aren’t going to believe this.”