Never Enough

I watched you get high
The heroin giving you relief I never could
I didn't understand at the time there was so much going on in your head
I wish you could've told me more about it before you passed

         I watched you party your way through life
         You always seemed so happy to be doing what you wanted
         No thoughts about what that would do to me
         Then I watched you leave you said vacation only you never came back living but not speaking to me

                   I watched you grow to hate me
                   I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire life
                   Yet I mean nothing to you that much has grown painfully obvious to me
                   I wish you would tell me what I did wrong why I am not worthy of you anymore

I watched you get sober multiple times
I thought for sure one day it would stick
That I would make a difference to you
But in the end I was nothing compared to relief

         I watched you take one child with you
         Leaving the rest of us behind
         I still don't get how you could do that
         Leave your children behind I was never loved enough by you

                   I watched you love someone new
                   The love I thought I had from you
                   I always knew I didn't deserve it
                   I wish you would stop lying and tell me that truth

I'm sorry I couldn't fix you
         I'm sorry I couldn't be a child you wanted
                   I'm sorry I love you

I want to be enough for you