Victoria's Secret

VICTORIA'S SECRET

______________

A 10 minute comedy

by

Jim Binz

8/2023

1212 Zeno Lane

Allison Park, PA 15201

Cell: 412-303-8607

E-mail:[e-mail]

CAST OF CHARACTERS

ALGEBRA PERKINS: Underwear model, 20's

ROSSETTI: Photographer, 30's

SCENE

Art Studio. Backdrop, stool, changing wall, camera on tripod. Lights, etc.

TIME

Now

ALGEBRA poses throughout in bra and panties. ROSETTI takes photos and gives directions.

ROSSETTI

More.

ALGEBRA

Queen Victoria reigned in Britain from 1837 to 1901. She influenced the arts of the times by insisting on the Victorian attitudes. Sexual disciplines like covering table and chair legs and having men wear trousers instead of tights. Women in polite Victorian society wore ever increasing amounts of petticoats and undercoats and corsets and bustles. The more elegant, the more layers.

ROSSETTI

Shoulder.

ALGEBRA

Britain was the dominant nation of the world at the time. They had the best Navy, the best trade, the best economy. They had the best arts and culture. Britain seemed in every way to be the most blessed nation on earth.

ROSSETTI

Back.

ALGEBRA

But, the real Victoria's Secret was that in the cities, the urban workers and orphans lived lives of desperation and poverty. Conditions were horrible. Sanitation was primitive and so many died. Their children were left to fend for themselves. Orphans worked in sweatshops and factories with very little pay and no rights and no safety considerations. The secret was that under all the finery - British life stunk.

ROSSETTI

Change.

(ALGEBRA goes behind the wall and changes into the next outfit)

ALGEBRA

The Victorian intelligentsia were clear on what they saw. Read Dickens. The life of the orphan in the city was a pitiable one. Dickens was forever changed. He peeked beneath the gown and saw the soiled underwear of his nation.

(Algebra returns to her stool)

ROSSETTI

Open.

ALGEBRA

Thomas Hardy wrote of the surface of Victorian society. That they knew what was beneath, but were powerless to change it. Alfred Lord Tennyson, in "The Charge of the Light Brigade" made war seem almost romantic and simple, but a cursory look beneath his intentions showed his view of the horror.

ROSSETTI

High neck.

ALGEBRA

Of course, George Eliot wrote at this time. She was a woman and a genius and disguised herself as a man. A deception so appropriate for this time period.

ROSSETTI

Shoulder

ALGEBRA

And then there was Oscar Wilde. Imagine "A Portrait of Dorian Grey" in those times. Your true identity is locked away in the attic and only the perfect you is ever seen.

ROSSETTI

Change

(ALGEBRA goes behind the wall and changes into another outfit)

ALGEBRA

My personal favorite from the Victorian Period was Algernon Charles Swinburne. Not just because of his beautiful name. He was truly a champion of the Victorian style, a master of meter and rhyme and he loved tackling the most challenging poetic forms from the history of poetics. His "Sestina" and "Choriambics" are master classes in how to write old style poetry. Such incredible beauty and style and intelligence at a time of penny dreadfuls and cheap magazines was astonishing.

(Algebra returns to her spot)

ROSSETTI

Petite

ALGEBRA

I love the trochees and the iambs. They make me so happy.

ROSSETTI

Bigger.

ALGEBRA

Aristocratic villains. Romantic triangles. Unrequited love.

ROSSETTI

Coy.

ALGEBRA

Sherlock Holmes and Watson. The truth hidden underneath the mystery. So Victorian. Swinburne's "Atalanta at Calydon" came from the Greek to the British. Such a gift. The beauty of the language. "When the hounds of spring are on winter's traces..." I love that. It just knocks me out every time.

ROSSETTI

Full front.

ALGEBRA

His poetry is full of anaphora and sibilance and septuplets, oh my.

ROSSETTI

Over shoulder.

ALGEBRA

I wish my life was more Victorian. I wish I was able to hide things and vaguely refer to them in passing. I wish I was a Victorian Pre-Raphaelite poet in 1865 Britain.

ROSSETTI

Less.

ALGEBRA

I would wear men's trousers and waistcoats and hide my gender from the world. I would write sensuous rhymes and master archaic poetic forms and styles. I would live with Dante and Algernon and the rest.

ROSSETTI

Good. Finished. Thank you.

(ALGEBRA shakes hands with ROSSETTI)

ALGEBRA

You are very welcome. Thank you. When will these appear?

ROSSETTI

Maybe the next catalog. Or perhaps the one after.

ALGEBRA

Great.

(ALGEBRA goes behind the wall and puts on a robe - ROSSETTI leaves with camera)

So many deceptions! Perfume, padding, fake poses and smiles. Life is a Victoria's Secret catalog, filled with deception and untruth.

(ALGEBRA begins removing her makeup and putting her hair in a messy pony)

Our lives are all made up. We are simple actors going through our daily choreographies and keeping our true natures hidden beneath the veil. Victoria's Secret lives on in each of us. What do you have hidden under your outer visage? What secrets do you keep under your hat? "The brown bright nightingale amorous is half assuaged for Itylus, for the Thracian ships and the foreign faces, the tongueless vigil, and all the pain."

(ALGEBRA Exits)

END OF PLAY