Close Encounter

“This is the….best day ever! Not only… am I at the coolest Star Trek Convention of all time but… I get to talk with the William Shatner!”

“What...what are you doing?”

“I’m trying…to talk like you, of course, Mr. Shatner. I mean your speech is one of the most iconic in all of Hollywood history.”

“That’s not the way I talk.”

“Sure it is! I’ve been practicing all year. Um, I mean, I’ve…been…practicing all year… And since this is...International Talk Like William Shatner Day…what better…way to celebrate than to talk like the Shatner with the…Shatner?”

“Kid, I know two Facebook loons thought it would be funny to…invent a day to…mock…my speech but this isn’t Talk Like William Shatner Day. It’s my birthday.”

“Meh, potato, tomato.”

“You don’t seem to…understand…This is my birthday party, not a Trekkie Convention. How did you get here?”

“Spaceship, duh!”

“Uh, huh…”

“It’s right outside, above the building. Er, uh, I mean, I…parked…it above –“

“Don’t hurt yourself, kid.”

"You know, I traveled pretty far to get to this event. Been waiting a long time to meet you, too. Took awhile for the radio waves to get to the far end of the galaxy so I could see all your adventures and then, you know, a lot of gas to get my ride all the way to Earth..."

"Look, I’ve got a pretty good sense of humor but if you don’t vacate posthaste, I’ll have to…call…the cops.

“Sheesh. Fine. Just lemme…push…this button. Alrighty, Qex, you were right. Even the famous star ship captain doesn’t want our company. Beam me up!”