Daily Flash Fiction. 11-16-20. W/C 206 |
Disenchantment “We aren’t friends anymore. I hate you.” “No you don’t.” “Yes, I’m pretty sure I do.” “No, you don’t.” “Pretty sure I do”. “No, you don’t.” “I hate you so bad, hate everything about you.” “No, you don’t.” “You are the worst. I hate you with every fiber of my being.” “No, you don’t. “Yep, pretty sure I hate you.” “No, you don’t. “ “See? It’s this very thing that I hate about you. Your constant denial of my feelings for you.” “No, you don’t.” “I can see you are stuck on the denial of this relationship. I do hate you.” “No, you don’t.” I disconnected the battery from the Roomba and returned it to the store. The lady at the service desk asked the reason I was returning it. “It talks back to me.” “Impossible. It’s a robot vacuum. It’s not able to talk to you.” “Oh really? Tell that to my terrified cat.” I showed her a picture of Mitzi cowering on the top of the curtains. “I’ve never seen a cat climb that high.” “Climb? The Roomba sucked her in and then spit her out. Mitzi jumped to the top of the curtains to escape.” I got a full refund on the recalcitrant robot. W/C 206 |