Potion to Defend Against the Dark Arts

Written for "Invalid Item" . Prompt: Either in form of a poem, a story, or a diary entry write about a Darks Art lesson or series of lessons where you invented a Dark Arts potion. Extra points will be given for creativity in creating it and what it can do. (under 750 words)

Dear Diary,

In today's Defense Against the Dark Arts class, we were supposed to test those protection potions. Remember I said Hermione's potion turning the drinker into an impenetrable beast was genius? It worked. That girl gets on my nerves. Okay, I'm jealous.

Ron's was odd. You have to squirt them and they turn into a flea? But then you can't find them and what if they jump on you and follow you home until it wears off? No A for him.

Do you know who is getting an A? Not me. I've been working to create a potion so if you get attacked, a rabid wolf appears and attacks your attacker? (Yeah, I used "attack" a lot there. Thankfully, I'm not entering this into a writing competition.) It's been difficult, but I thought it was good to have a potion that you could just drink and not have to worry about sneak attacks. The rabid wolf appears so long as there is still potion in your system. The combination of cortisol and adrenaline levels trigger the response. It was genius, if I do say so myself.

I thought using both the plant Oenothera wolfii for the wolf properties and Theobroma cacao plant for bitterness that cacao brings before it's chocolate would make for a feisty wolf. I still say it would. But well, let's just say mistakes were made.

Here's what happened. I stayed up almost all night last night getting my potion ready because it's pretty labor-intensive. Problem one was after adding the dried Theobroma cacao leaves, I was supposed to stir 6 times to the left. Apparently, I stirred to the right instead. Honestly, it was like 3 a.m., so I'm not surprised. Why do these things have to be so precise? II could stir Mrs. Dursley's Pudding either direction and it would be just as delicious...and the sugared violets wouldn't turn violent.

Problem two--my Latin. I said "lepus" instead of "lupus." I was so tired. The stupid potion knew what I meant. I hate Latin anyway. Since "lupus" means "wolf" and "lepus" means "rabbit," yeah, you know where I'm going with this...I'm going to repeat this class is where I'm going.

So, I drank the potion and I hadn't even gotten to class when Pansy Parkinson started teasing me in the hall. Apparently, that's all it takes. I felt threatened and well, the good news is the potion works, sort of. But instead of a rabid wolf appearing and attacking her (which, I admit, might have been going a bit far, you know, sticks and stones, etc.), a chocolate rabbit appeared. We were both quite surprised. Then she started laughing and teasing even more, until it attacked her. Now that was a sight to see!

The good news is that Professor Snape saw the whole thing, so he knows I did my potion. The bad news is Professor Snape saw the whole thing, so he knows I did my potion wrong. He also had to do the Episkey spell on Pansy because she attacked the rabbit back by trying to eat it and she felt quite sick afterwards--probably like Muggle children after Halloween.

So, what happened? Pansy got out of her class. I got a lecture--something about teasing not being a "Dark Art." Agree to disagree. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow when the whole of Hogwarts has heard about my defense potion. I'll be the laughing stock. Too bad I can't use the Forgetfulness Charm on everyone.

Anyway, my punishment is for the next two weeks, I have to do all of the stirring of everyone's potions in class when left stirring is required since I accidentally stirred to the right. And I have to write "A lepus is a rabbit and a lupus is a wolf. Lepuses leap and Lupuses lope" five hundred times. At least he didn't make me eat the rest of the chocolate rabbit. There was chocolate carnage everywhere!

Alright, Diary, that's enough. I hope one day, when I'm a famous wizard, these events will inspire other young wizards that they too, can become great like me. Or this might serve as evidence in a future trial to have my wizarding privileges revoked. Honestly, it could go either way. Anyway, time for bed. Oh, before bed, I need to send a quick note to my parents. I'm going to ask them to just give me jelly beans for Easter next year...no more chocolate rabbits for me.

Word Count = 748